As a short man, did you ever had a hot girlfriend?

[Olaf]

oh of course Kevin Harts wife! He is rich and famous, but still.

 

Edited 22 hours ago by Olaf

[Emerald]

I'm 5'2". And as long as a guy is taller than me, it wouldn't be a dealbreaker.

Yet again, I also find Peter Dinklage attractive. So, maybe height is not a dealbreaker at all.

I just find that most of the guys I've been romantically attracted to over the years have all happened to be between 5'7" and 5'10... either average or shorter side of average.

And I've never specifically tried to avoid dating guys who are over 6ft. I just happened to be interested in specific guys who were average height or a bit shorter. 

So, even if I aesthetically appreciate height in the abstract... it doesn't seem to draw me that much or motivate me to seek out a romantic connection. Otherwise, I'd have selected for much taller partners and/or have more crushes on taller guys, if it did.

So, while height tends to be a more classically handsome quality and most women would find taller guys more attractive than shorter guys in the abstract, I don't find that increase in general attractiveness that tall guys have very compelling as I'm much more tuned into the guy's specific personality and physical appearance.

And many women (perhaps most) are probably selecting for other factors that pertain more to personality and facial looks/figure being generally a looks-match to themselves. 

Really, as long as you don't register to a woman as unattractive facially and figure-wise, you probably don't have to worry that much about physical traits like height being a disqualifier... especially if you are taller than the woman in question.  

So, if you're worried that there won't be women interested on you because of your height, then I can assure you that's not true.

OR if you're worried, "All women always prefer the taller man", that's also not true. As long as you're over a particular woman's "non un-attracted to" threshold (which will be around her level of physical attractiveness... and maybe a degree or two in either direction), your height won't be a dealbreaker... and the focus will be more about your personality.

[Cubbage]

I'm 5 foot 5 and have never had a gf or sexual partner that isn't hot by my standards or in general. My last actual relationship was with an Iranian model who was taller than me. I'm not particularly good looking in a conventional sense either. Height is all in your head, soon as you let it go life gets much easier and funnier due to how it offends guys who only have being tall going for them and nothing else.

[Cubbage]

My tallest partner was 6 foot 5 lol if anything, I was more unattracted by her height than she was of mine. Instead of worrying about your height being a problem, be more concerned about other factors high value women find attractive instead.

Edited 20 hours ago by Cubbage

[Cubbage]

@Never_give_up My dad is 5 foot 1 and he never had trouble back in the day either haha other men will make you worry about your height, women are not arsed and if they are then they aren't worth your time. 

[Olaf]

@Cubbage Here we go! 

[Cubbage]

Just now, Olaf said:

@Cubbage Here we go! 

 

[AtmanIsBrahman]

6 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

From a woman's perspective - I do not care about height.

I *do* care about integrity. If you lie about your height on a dating app, or to my face, I am going to assess you very, very critically. As opposed to being more charitable and open (which is my normal operandi when meeting new people).

Pretty much all men lie about height on dating apps. It is justified from a certain pov because women have height filters that eliminate a huge quantity of men from the pool. 

I mean, yes, it is low-integrity devilry technically, but compared to all the other things humans do it's quite understandable.

Edited 17 hours ago by AtmanIsBrahman

[AtmanIsBrahman]

8 hours ago, Never_give_up said:

I am 167 cm (5'6), that's what I consider short. 

The hard truth is that it's a massive disadvantage. 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

7 minutes ago, AtmanIsBrahman said:

Pretty much all men lie about height on dating apps. It is justified from a certain pov because women have height filters that eliminate a huge quantity of men from the pool. 

I mean, yes, it is low-integrity devilry technically, but compared to all the other things humans do it's quite understandable.

It is low integrity no matter how we want to twist it. Lesser of two poor behaviours doesn't make the behaviour any better or excuse it. Just because others around us have shit standards for integrity doesn't justify our own lies and poor conduct.

Fixation on height is just going to limit your mindset and reduce ones sense of agency. You don't want a woman who is qualifying a man this way. It isn't even a useful proxy. 

[AtmanIsBrahman]

3 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

It is low integrity no matter how we want to twist it. Lesser of two poor behaviours doesn't make the behaviour any better or excuse it. Just because others around us have shit standards for integrity doesn't justify our own lies and poor conduct.

Yes, but we do live in a world where survival matters. Are you aware of how bad average men's results are on dating apps? I wouldn't hold it against them for being a couple inches generous with their own height. 

I think your perspective is somewhat female-biased. And I know mine might be male-biased, but there has to be a middle ground somewhere.

 

 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

19 minutes ago, AtmanIsBrahman said:

Yes, but we do live in a world where survival matters. Are you aware of how bad average men's results are on dating apps? I wouldn't hold it against them for being a couple inches generous with their own height. 

I think your perspective is somewhat female-biased. And I know mine might be male-biased, but there has to be a middle ground somewhere.

It isn't gendered - it is a bias to integrity. It is one of my top values. Obviously a personal opinion. 

It isn't about height. It is about the lies.

Edited 16 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[AtmanIsBrahman]

15 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

It isn't gendered - it is a bias to integrity. It is one of my top values. Obviously a personal opinion. 

It isn't about height. It is about the lies.

Okay, fair enough.

[Cubbage]

1 hour ago, AtmanIsBrahman said:

The hard truth is that it's a massive disadvantage. 

It is if you tell yourself that. I have loads of short mates, even shorter than me. They have no trouble pulling girls. I have never been one for picking up girls at all I've just had good relationships with good looking girls without thinking into my height or looks ever. The difference in 'hotness' between the girls my shorter and taller mates pull is, well, fuck all, cause there isn't any. Maybe things in other countries are different, in the UK, it is not a big deal.

[bazera]

14 hours ago, Never_give_up said:

Maybe the problem isn't my height but that I can't lose my weight. During covid quarantine I became fat and since then I can't lose weight. Before that I attracted some short girls. I had completely forgot about that. Yeah, it may can happen! All I need is to lose weight. I was 60 kg athlete attracting girls , now I am embarassed to say but I am 84 kg, that's 24 kg fat. I will lose weight, maybe it will take 5 years but I WILL.  

You can lose all that fat in under a year and plus build a muscle and recompose your body. 

What have you actually tried to lose that weight? Like what specific ways did you try to lose the fat? Just list them to me. Maybe you haven't tried as hard as you think you did. 

As for the shorter guys, I've seen very short guys with beautiful short girls, but rarely I find short guy with a taller girl. 

Work on things that you can control, like weight-lost, this you can control 100%, no exuses here!

I myself am on the way to losing 35kg. Already down -10kg very easily, in a healthy and sustainable way.  

[bazera]

12 hours ago, Olaf said:

oh of course Kevin Harts wife! He is rich and famous, but still.

Yeah, being a millionaire comedian doesn't hurt 

[Never_give_up]

@bazeraI run and eat healthy. I have lost weight 2 times and regained it and more cause if I lose it too quickly my hunger goes up and it's impossible not to eat.  

I was losing 1 kg per week but that's so much for my body. I lost 12 kg and then regained them. Now I want to lose 1 kg per month , i don't want to make mistakes any more. 

My problem is  not losing weight. I can do that. My problem is not regain it. 

[meta_male]

@Never_give_up I used to have a rather short friend and he was way more successful attracting girls than I was. He was very outgoing.

Edited 3 hours ago by meta_male

[Olaf]

@Never_give_up look into the pattern, you got to fix the issue from the cause, not the effect. What makes you gain weight and why? That is the deeper question.