I want to hear a womans opinion

[Ulax]

43 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

I wonder what the male version of "the ick" is?  

We should invent a word lol

[Ulax]

Hmmm, I got the "Boner demoter", the "flaccid", the "drop"

[Joseph Maynor]

10 minutes ago, Ulax said:

We should invent a word lol

We can't say right because we should be gentlemen.  

[Ulax]

5 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

We can't say right because we should be gentlemen.  

Having flaws helps us seem more attainable

[Joshe]

55 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

I am going the opposite way as a method of meta mind exploration - and I feel like this insane experiment might appeal to you, haha! So far it has lead me down some unusual growth paths - namely in being able to cross pollenate and merge different frameworks together. Feeling and emotional based stuff.

Please, do tell!

[Joseph Maynor]

10 minutes ago, Ulax said:

Having flaws helps us seem more attainable

This is true.  Flawlessness is suspicious.  

[Monster Energy]

8 hours ago, Joshe said:

You could see those as data points. Collect a thousand and you're probably doing well. Or just theorize from macro surface behavior, up to you. 

Sure, we can learn something from it. I just wouldn’t confuse two women’s personal preferences with the female instruction manual.

 

 

Edited 22 hours ago by Monster Energy

[Monster Energy]

7 hours ago, Emerald said:

Do you mean the OP lost "aura points" in my eyes and the eyes of the few other women on this thread?

First off... no it didn't. It's a normal question to ask.

Secondly, if it had lost him "aura points' in my eyes... why would it even matter what some married 37 year old internet lady thought about his aura?

It’s not that the question itself is bad. The problem is that Olaf, a guy, is asking women how he should approach women. That can come across as insecure, and that’s where the aura points are lost. If a woman asked the exact same question, it wouldn’t be nearly as bad.

Olaf isn’t a woman asking this, nor is he on his way to becoming one. So why pretend the optics don’t matter? Of course you don’t care. You’re not in your prime anymore and you already have a partner. I’m talking about women who are still in the game and under 30.

And this is exactly why I made that other thread about women being deceptive. You want us to believe you’re all angels who never judge a guy for things like this, but we both know that’s not how attraction works.

Attraction responds to confidence, not a guy standing there asking, “So what do women want me to do?”

 

 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

31 minutes ago, Monster Energy said:

Attraction responds to confidence, not a guy standing there asking, “So what do women want me to do?”

But that isn't what he asked. That is your interpretation to try to validate your points.

Quote

that can come across as insecure, and that’s where the aura points are lost. 

Status re-enforcement. The aura points argument is more likely to say more about the person claiming it - namely that they aren't secure in themselves. Comparison based. Inter-male dominance hierarchy stuff. It reads as low status to me from here. In addition "that CAN come across". Yes - it can - it relies on interpretation. One possible interpretation of many. Many dudes won't interpret it in the way you did. Just as insecure guys will see threat.

You seem very confused and upset about this topic. Based on the rhetoric you engage in.

Edited 21 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[Ulax]

Only people who really understand casual dating are the advanced pickup dudes

[Joshe]

16 hours ago, Monster Energy said:

I just wouldn’t confuse two women’s personal preferences with the female instruction manual.

I've known many women in my life and they all basically operate this way. So if your manual doesn't see these viewpoints as representative, it's a bad manual.

I was best friends with a couple of serial fuck-boys and it was insane how easily they got laid. Once had two hotties (or is it "baddies" these days?, lol) in the car and I already knew the 10 was going to my buddy and figured the 8 would be mine. Nope, they both wanted him. Crushing!

I could have interpreted the experience as "This is unfair. Women are shallow sluts. Fuck them, and fuck guys like him". 

Or "Well, this motherfucker is producing an effect that I'm not producing". 

Notice the second interpretation allows for agency. "What do I have to do to compete? Obviously, I can't rely on my looks here." 

So yeah, on the whole, women are more likely to fuck guys like that, because who wouldn't go for the most attractive person if given the option? You can't allow that fact to make you resentful toward women. You are the same way. In my 2-girls 2-guys car story, everyone wanted the most attractive person, lol. That's just how it works on short horizons with little history. Both girls from my story used to called me regularly and the 8 eventually did come around and the 10 grew a little attraction toward me over time as well, which only happened after I talked to them a good bit. 

Luckily for us, women actually do care more about deep connection with an ordinary dude more than they do about shallow connection with Chad, even if Chad gets them easier and they're willing to put up with shallow connection for a time because he's attractive.

It's an interesting idea that pickup is an attempt to be an antidote not just for getting pussy, but to deal with the emotions of not being wanted the way Chad is wanted.

Edited 6 hours ago by Joshe

[Joshe]

"Chad wound", lol. 

[LordFall]

@Joshe This is a high quality post. It's a key insight to separate the dating strategy from the self-esteem strategies. It's important to develop self-awareness and identify what you actually want in life and not just react to your formative trauma.

A lot of guys don't care about getting women, they just want to feel okay with themselves. The average man is not ambitious at all.

To me I used to sort of hate popular people and think they had the best life while I was not doing much. The more I experience life and level up the more I realize a lot of popular people are mostly extroverts that like to socialize a lot which makes them popular. A lot of them are genuinely fun people to be around and they offer a lot of value so people wanna be around them. Some of these popular women have pure golden retriever energy not a single evil bone in their body but people hate on them due to sour grapes. 

For me I find the quest for status to be like a video game in real life. The more you understand how the world works and climb the more bonus items you unlock as well. Getting hotter and more girls and more money is like the cherry on top. It's also very cool to increase your ability to impact other's lives, I've started to become a community leader and genuinely solving people's problems for them is also maybe not intoxicating but very deeply grounding and rewarding. 

Edited 6 hours ago by LordFall

[Joshe]

@LordFall Thanks! 

That's cool about helping the community. I'm too introverted for all that, but I do like helping people and it's definitely good for the soul. What exactly are you doing, if you don't mind?

 

[LordFall]

4 minutes ago, Joshe said:

@LordFall Thanks! 

That's cool about helping the community. I'm too introverted for all that, but I do like helping people and it's definitely good for the soul. What exactly are you doing, if you don't mind?

 

I run a few creatives pages/group chats in different cities in Canada. Considering starting a full on talent agency next year as my techstack and marketing ability should be able to start getting good results for others and not just my own brands. 

This is my biggest community so far in Calgary, Alberta

https://www.instagram.com/calgary_creatives

Being an introvert doesn't stop you from participating socially, you have to find high leverage ways though so you can work on it on your own time and then get together with people monthly and biweekly to host events or meetings. 

[Inliytened1]

17 hours ago, Monster Energy said:

It’s not that the question itself is bad. The problem is that Olaf, a guy, is asking women how he should approach women. That can come across as insecure, and that’s where the aura points are lost. If a woman asked the exact same question, it wouldn’t be nearly as bad.

Olaf isn’t a woman asking this, nor is he on his way to becoming one. So why pretend the optics don’t matter? Of course you don’t care. You’re not in your prime anymore and you already have a partner. I’m talking about women who are still in the game and under 30.

And this is exactly why I made that other thread about women being deceptive. You want us to believe you’re all angels who never judge a guy for things like this, but we both know that’s not how attraction works.

Attraction responds to confidence, not a guy standing there asking, “So what do women want me to do?”

 

 

It doesn't make a guy weak to ask a girl what it takes.  Actually it takes guts.  Because maybe they will tell you something you needed to know.   So guys don't give @Olaf a hard time. I commend him.  Why not pick a chick's brain?  If they think you weak for it then move on.  They all say they want a sensitive guy anyway.  There's nothing wrong with it.

Edited 4 hours ago by Inliytened1

[Joshe]

1 hour ago, LordFall said:

I run a few creatives pages/group chats in different cities in Canada. Considering starting a full on talent agency next year as my techstack and marketing ability should be able to start getting good results for others and not just my own brands. 

This is my biggest community so far in Calgary, Alberta

https://www.instagram.com/calgary_creatives

Sweet, looks interesting. 

1 hour ago, LordFall said:

Being an introvert doesn't stop you from participating socially, you have to find high leverage ways though so you can work on it on your own time and then get together with people monthly and biweekly to host events or meetings. 

You're still young and full of zest. That might not always be the case. 

I do like the idea of planned, minimal meetups though. That could work for me. What do you do? Just social media outreach invites? And what is the stated goal of your meetups? I could only get so far into your profile without an IG account. 

[LordFall]

Yeah depends on what your goals are. People like to meetup in person so hosting events is a great way to offer value and build your relevance and brand.

With that page I host creative events like photoshoots and open mics. Here is a content creation type of event I hosted in May.

I have a business and investment page and I hosted an investment meetup at that same venue a few months earlier. That went well but I'm not as qualified in that niche so I have to work with other people richer than me to give me credibility but it's the same principle of leverage. 

 

[Joshe]

1 hour ago, LordFall said:

Yeah depends on what your goals are. People like to meetup in person so hosting events is a great way to offer value and build your relevance and brand.

With that page I host creative events like photoshoots and open mics. Here is a content creation type of event I hosted in May.

I have a business and investment page and I hosted an investment meetup at that same venue a few months earlier. That went well but I'm not as qualified in that niche so I have to work with other people richer than me to give me credibility but it's the same principle of leverage. 

 

That's awesome dude. You're on your way!

I did some phenibut the other day and had insanely deep insights into how to be more socially likeable. I worked a lot of it out and started systematizing it, but then abandoned it because I just really don't care, lol.

Your socializing is very good for an INTP. It seems totally normal, so props to that.

If I were you and wanting to maximize, which you seem to want to, I would figure out how to effect any interaction in the way that you want. You can systematize affect while also being authentic.

It was some deep shit that I came across and would like to share at some point. If you've never done phenibut, you can get some from nordic chems and try that out socially and see if/how that changes things.

Good shit bro!

[LordFall]

@Joshe Thanks bro I appreciate it! 

For me the next thing I'm working on is doubling down on systems of leverage. I found a happy medium of mostly being an introvert that works and researches his own concepts for most of the day and now have a way to collaborate with people on them.

If I could scale it to the point where it's a functioning business that takes advantage of AI to help local creatives build their careers through my agency, that would be sweet.

17 minutes ago, Joshe said:

If I were you and wanting to maximize, which you seem to want to, I would figure out how to effect any interaction in the way that you want. You can systematize affect while also being authentic.

That's an interesting concept, what do you mean by it? I think I get it but I'm not sure. I've bonded quite deeply with my fellow human beings in the past few years but there is a limit to that bond with my current ability since if we can't solve our problems what are we doing bonding? What good is gonna come out of it?

I did Phenibut a few times years ago, I don't remember much from it but I had a buddy who loved taking it for socializing. 

Edited 2 hours ago by LordFall