Is spirituality suited for me ?

[Majed]

I have ocd and bipolar type 1, as well as a predisposition to developing schizophrenia. I was wondering if deep spiritual work is suited for me since i have these conditions, obviously psychedelics are a big no, because they present too high of a risk for mania and psychosis. 

But even meditation retreats as well as existential contemplations carry significant risks. 

I have suffered so much, to a degree beyond reason or comprehension because of these conditions, before and during early treatment. 

Now that i'm looking back i think that deep meditations and contemplations could have triggered the manifestation of these conditions in me although i certainly had genetic and biochemical predispositions. 

I think i might drop spirituality and just live a simple life. 

[Jirh]

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Edited 1 hour ago by Jirh

[ChrisZoZo]

@Majed It is hard to suggest what spirituality to you it just seem you are fear based about anything spirituality. If you feel like you wouldn’t be fear based about channelling material. Maybe you can look into that. 

Meditation itself is just focusing on the breath. If you apply negative connotations to it, it can create negative outcomes. 

For some reason I feel like suggesting to you to pray towards being that you feel like would be  very loving, caring and healing. For example of Jesus Christ who you can summon by calling him his actual name Jeshua. 

Mabye look up a names of angels and choose what you seem is best. From this, you can then ask the angel to turn your meditation into a positive outcome and it will be so if you feel into the positivity.