advice on text game

[Olaf]

@something_else thank you for explaining, maybe a balance is necessary between flirting and getting to the logistical part of setting the date?

[PsychedelicEagle]

The phone is for setting dates.

@something_else, with all the respect, let me point that "chemistry over text" and "Gen Z" are excuses to not be as direct as one could. If the girl is into you, she'll go out with you. If she's not, nothing you can text her will change how she feels. There are very few exceptions to this, as @LordFall said.

Every character (or token, if you happen to be an LLM) must be typed in with the ultimate purpose of setting up a definite date. Trying to be "flirty" will set you up to come across as unsure of yourself or of your attraction to her. A couple of messages is more than enough.

Example:

- Hi Mary, it's John, nice meeting briefly yesterday

- Hi John, yes, nice meeting indeed. How is your week starting?

- Great! Just came back from work. Did you manage to take the train in time? Btw, it would be cool to catch up in person again. How's your schedule for this week or next?

[something_else]

20 minutes ago, LordFall said:

The chemistry is usually done when you meet the girl in person. Sure do a few texts but for example if you literally don't know the girl as she's from online dating the sequence should be opener -> she responds -> banter for 1-2 lines -> ask her out. You basically never build chemistry over text in 80% of texts IMO from my own life experience and all the men I've known from many game communities it'll most likely bore her if she's a girl with a regular social life. If you're like on eharmony or meeting women through Reddit or something out of the norm then disregard this advice I have no idea how that works. 

Yea I'm not suggesting you text for ages before going on a date, but you need to build at least some basic chemistry with a few texts. Even on dating apps, I generally send 2-3 flirty messages on the app then ask for a whatsapp, then a little bit of flirting, then invite out for drinks. If you are good at texting you can build decent chemistry with only a few messages. That is where the skill in texting lies.

There's a dating app called Breeze which streamlines the dating app process by removing any ability to chat, they plan the date for you. It works somewhat well, but I have suggested it to something like 4-5 women and most of them were irked/scared by the idea of zero texting before meeting a guy, which shows to me that texting is at least somewhat important.

[Schizophonia]

I jestermaxx better 

[something_else]

10 minutes ago, PsychedelicEagle said:

@something_else, with all the respect, let me point that "chemistry over text" and "Gen Z" are excuses to not be as direct as one could. If the girl is into you, she'll go out with you. If she's not, nothing you can text her will change how she feels. There are very few exceptions to this, as @LordFall said.

I'm not arguing you shouldn't be direct. I'm arguing that the skill lies in being both direct and flirty enough to build some chemistry over text while also moving things forward.

Don't be so direct that you scare her or are boring, and don't text for so long that you end up wasting her time and yours. The text message chain you gave there is very formal and honestly quite boring. You should be playful, direct, and flirty.

The age plays into it because most women from my generation have grown up on phones and thus expect you to have basic texting skills. If you end up in a relationship you're going to text a lot, and if you cannot do that in an interesting way from the beginning many women will interpret this as poor social skills / poor communication skills.

[Schizophonia]

7 minutes ago, something_else said:

I'm not arguing you shouldn't be direct. I'm arguing that the skill lies in being both direct and flirty enough to build some chemistry over text while also moving things forward.

Don't be so direct that you scare her or are boring, and don't text for so long that you end up wasting her time and yours. The text message chain you gave there is very formal and honestly quite boring. You should be playful, direct, and flirty.

The age plays into it because most women from my generation have grown up on phones and thus expect you to have basic texting skills. If you end up in a relationship you're going to text a lot, and if you cannot do that in an interesting way from the beginning many women will interpret this as poor social skills / poor communication skills.

The best thing to do to me is keep being authentic and let the sorting happen all by itself.

There are all the possible and imaginable games of people with a more or less compatible energy.

[PsychedelicEagle]

The phone is for setting dates.

Again, "chemistry over text", "women from my generation", and "[women] expect you to have basic texting skills" is nonsense. All that matters is how she feels about you. No texting will raise her attraction level. If that was the case nerds would all have their dicks worn out just by sitting at a desk and using GPT to craft "flirty" messages.

Be direct, decisive, and set definite dates as soon as possible.

Edited 1 hour ago by PsychedelicEagle