Question to women

[Leo Gura]

2 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Is there a masculine version of this? Or perhaps it is inherent to the feminine polarity as the masculine is typically seen as the 'structure', or that which holds space for the feminine.

It is asymmetrical. The masculine does not need to do this.

This is a fuction of the masculine containment dynamic. The feminine needs to test that the masculine container is legit and won't collapse. The masculine does not need the same from the feminine.

The feminine is screening the masculine for strength. The masculine is not screening the feminine for strength but for beauty.

The masculine version of this is asking to see the girl with her make-up off. Haha! 

Men fake strength and women fake beauty. Which is what the real value is and why both are tested for fakeness.

Real value is always faked by imposers to gain survival advantage. It's all just unconscious survival.

Edited 5 hours ago by Leo Gura

[Staples]

 

1 hour ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Is there a masculine version of this? Or perhaps it is inherent to the feminine polarity as the masculine is typically seen as the 'structure', or that which holds space for the feminine.

Nice analogy btw - speaks right to the awakened construction manager within meeeeeeeeee 

Immature men will act up to see how much bad behavior their girl will tolerate before leaving them. But that's very different from shit testing.

[Davino]

Shit tests are very very real.

I've never gotten a women to see them.

If you are mature and grounded, it's very clear to see when there's a problem, she's going through something or if it's a shit test.

It blows my brains out they can't see it.

It makes me wonder what are the equivalent masculine blindspots, so hardwired in our psyche we are oblivious to them.

 

Pd: A sign of a shit test is if it's intense, it feels real, she touches your buttons, but it's also drama and superficial. If you pass them she's very soon happy again and everything is fine. 

Edited 5 hours ago by Davino

[Emerald]

2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

That's not what a shit-test means.

A shit-test is when the woman unconsciously acts out to test a man's groundedness. Women do do that. But it's not a conscious intention. It's just the feminine way of being. Women will say and do things sometimes to throw a man off. They do this instinctively. From the man's POV it can feel like a test even though the woman doesn't see it that way.

A shit-test is like kicking a structural support column on a building just to see that it doesn't collapse on you. A weak or inexperienced man will collapse.

My experience is that you can mostly tell where the structural weaknesses are in someone's character upon the first 10-15 minutes of meeting them... no conscious or unconscious "shit tests" needed.

You can tell someone's character, insecurities, coping strategies, and level of resilience by simply observing them and listening to their voice and watching their facial expressions and how they move their body... and the vibe they give off. You don't even need to interact with them.

Like, if I am taking some kind of liberty (conscious or unconscious) to throw a man off, I already know intuitively that he can handle it... or I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't go trying that with a guy who I even slightly suspected couldn't handle it.

Are you sure that women are unconsciously doing these "shit tests" with the unconscious intention of throwing a man off so that she can assess him?

Or is it that men tend to get thrown off by how women generally operate and interpret it as a test that's being directed at him, when it's actually just women operating differently from how men generally operate?

I notice that the tendency within a lot of male dating perspectives to want to internalize as much responsibility as possible in the context of dating to as maximizing responsibility also maximize powers and control over their dating lives.

But this often leads to distortional narrativizing about women's nature in a way that puts the man at the center of the reason for a woman's behavior. And it frames the man as both cause and solution to women's behaviors.... which is empowering to believe but ultimately untrue.

So, I could see this "shit test" thing as being about men feeling unsteadied by how a woman is operating differently from how he would tend to operate... and centering himself and interpreting it as a test that he must pass.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

19 minutes ago, Davino said:

I've never gotten a women to see them.

I can see how they would be a subconscious mechanism that is inherent to women's need for safety. And pointing out subconscious behavior in others - especially women - tends to not go down so well

49 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

The masculine version of this is asking to see the girl with her make-up off. Haha! 

Funny you say that. It was what immediately came to mind when I asked you the question! I know that can be a big core element of intimacy for a women (when she is comfortable enough to freeball it [so to speak]). I am glad I don't have that sort of pathology. 

 

 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

@Emerald  

I just like to experience lots of things with a mate. Their reaction and actions communicate everything without the subterfuge of a shit-test.

Is that a shit test though?

I would assume it is the mechanism men use also. Mature men, that is.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

Maybe a masculine shit test is taking her to the pool, swimming. Or just one of those ceremonial fuckfest 24hr lock-ins you do when you first hook up. Where there is no time for beautifying just that phase of wanting to eat each other

 

[aurum]

Masculine shit-test is when we ask if you're into astrology 

[Ramasta9]

On 10/23/2025 at 5:34 AM, Sandroew said:

Well, i was about to write a comment here, but then i tought, lets see what the women here would have to say for themselves first?

yet you still made a comment, thumbs up big man, you were the first

[Leo Gura]

2 hours ago, aurum said:

Masculine shit-test is when we ask if you're into astrology 

No need to ask, they are 

Edited 2 hours ago by Leo Gura

[AION]

Men test too but these are codependent men. They screen for security and are afraid to be abandoned. 

Secure attached or avoidant attached (narcissistic) guys don’t screen women. Their frame is sealed off. If they just want to get laid they will screen for slut test  and if they want something serious they test for slut test too. These men can smell a slut from a mile. This is their sixth sense.

Masculine containment is just a part of what is really needed for a guy to pass the test. There are far more important stuff which I won’t share here. 

Edited 4 hours ago by AION

[Spiral]

I do not like shit tests, they are annoying. Regardless if you pass them or not

[Natasha Tori Maru]

43 minutes ago, aurum said:

Masculine shit-test is when we ask if you're into astrology 

Before smartphones were a thing, my mum had one of those huge horoscope books with compatibilities. Male Sage / female Gemini, female Sag / male Gemini etc. It went IN DEPTH and was big enough to kill a rabbit if it was dropped from shoulder height. Typical of books that were floating around in bathrooms, child me read it almost cover to cover.

One day I asked my dad where they got the information from. I asked if it was from Encarta (Dad taught me electronics and how to build early PCs).

'The fumes of stale fantasies of women stuck inside their minds, who's romantic lives are exactly like the dried dog turds on the lawn out the back'

Mum wouldn't talk to Dad for a good day or two after! Bit late for a shit-test

Edited 3 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[Miguel1]

Girls do shit-test, that’s for sure. You can visually and viscerally see their attraction spike up, when you pass them.

The question is, do conscious women also shit-test? Probably no girl is beyond shit-testing, similar to no conscious guy is beyond a perfect pair of boobs.

Unless you are done with the sexual game.

[Leo Gura]

This whole notion of shit-tests can just be subsumed under the notion of masculine containment. Once you understand that notion then shit-tests are just a natural consequence of it.

The man's role is to ground the woman and she will play around with that. That's what feminine means.