Why I'm Leaving America (for good)

[ryoko]

You've got one thing right. The biome you're in have a huge effect on culture and values. What biome is SK? Did you check? You also have a really toxic tendency to generalize places as "East Asia", what you refer as East Asia are countries with so varying levels of culture and biome. Don't get tricked by how similar their faces look. 

If you are going to move to a laid back region. Goodluck. But know this, no matter where, you'll always find low conscious people. May be with different values. 

It's easy to get tricked into thinking Korea is laid back. I'm from a tropical region. I can suggest some places, if you're interested. But know that it's not gonna be compatible with what's around, integrating with any culture is bad. Best places are isolated places where you're left with no noise. 

Also people in these countries are Xenophobic to great extents. Especially the laid back people you romanticise. 

[ryoko]

It will be an interesting experiment to go off the grid. Live through barter, get deported because you're staying illegally, or heck even spend some time in prisons. You're living so deep in nature you got no energy to worry about passports and electricity. 

This is extremely hard work, and that exact laid back energy is what helps them survive while doing these hard things. Living in nature is hard. 

Try Nepal, stay in basecamps, bare minimum survival. 

[Staples]

@WonderSeeker Enjoy Korea. You will appreciate the break from American life.

Don't expect life to get easier just by being in another country. You will still have problems, just different problems.

 

[Schizophonia]

On 11/08/2025 at 6:48 PM, PurpleTree said:

Are you talking about the Islamic Republic of Francistan?

hihi jk

i do like France(istan)

On 13/08/2025 at 9:20 AM, meta_male said:

@PurpleTree Still one of the most scenic Middle Eastern countries in the West. Right after Switzerland.

Al hamdulilah

 

[WonderSeeker]

On 8/10/2025 at 8:23 PM, BlessedLion said:

Hey man,

 

I just wanted to say I really resonate with your post and everything you are saying here. I grew up in the US, Southern California and Texas. SoCal was dope but Texas was awful. Anyway, I went to college there and the second I graduated i got a job that let me travel remote (before it was mainstream, like 2017) This let me go to Colombia, Mexico, Bali, Brazil, Europe and I quickly learned that I had been a square peg trying to fit myself into a round hole my whole life. I always felt America was so tense, cold, and hyper competitve, and also just so indiviualistic with little care on community, connection or depth.

I have been pursuing self actualization and consciousness for around a decade now and I spent about 8 years outside the US. For whatever reason this summer i had the "Call" to come back to America and see how it is. So i got an apartment in a city and have been living here for like 8 weeks now. 

Man.... It's tough to live here. I'm not going to say it's all bad, there are positives, and this is a nuanced thing, but for the cost of living for the value is totally not worth it. I've also found it really tough to meet people, everyone is just kind of on their own pace and even in yoga events, ecstatic dance, etc people just come- do the event- and leave. The ability to connect here is lost, it feels like people have lost that skill, the individualism of American culture has backfired massively. Without drugs, or alcohol most people just can't dive deep or be themselves.

 

I went out to some clubs and bars to try and socialize or have fun, it was so soul draining. So much performance and everyone is high and drunk as fuck. I've partied in other countries, yet in other countries it feels more like a celebration of life (Like in Brazil) but in the US it's like a numbing/escape. Luckily I have only 1 month left here and i can't wait to leave. Im either going to move to Mexico or Brazil, likely Brazil it has more than everything I'd ever want. 

This was such a clarifying trip to me. I don't belong here, it's unconsious, and not very warm, it's tense, everyone is obsessed with politics. The dating scene is awful, the women here are mostly out of touch with their femininity for the large part- i couldn't hook up with them if i wanted to, so i've just been going into celibacy and semen retention practices here, which has been super potent. Idk, I just look around the city and get this huge "childish" vibe. Like everyone is living their little clay life, eating their avocado toast, walking their dogs, and living for the weekend, no one seems to be pursuing mastery of any sort and it's just coffee to scrolling to booze to porn to video games. My roomate is a good example of this, dude sits on his phone for 8-9 hours a day scrolling tik tok, then goes out to drink and fuck a random chick, his poor dog barely gets taken care of and i have to help it because i don't want it to suffer. 

 

One of the most challenging things about self actualizing and development is that it gets lonely. You no longer care about what the masses care about, you see it as a waste of time, energy, and an opening to karma you don't want. I simply can't connect on these values and interests and i don't drink or do drugs so that cuts out a good portion of bonding activities. 

 

Anyway, I think choosing to leave is a good call and you won't drown in debt either. There are much better places to live than America where you can find strong community and aligned vibes. 

 

This is just my take, so i hope people don't get butthurt and start flinging shit at me because my perspective makes them insecure about their own decisions.

Thanks for sharing. You hit the nail on the head. Really can't add much more. Takes a certain type to see "this" U.S. as somehow normal or better.

Some positives, yes. Access to nature is #1 for me. I grew up in New York state / Vermont, and you have there some of the most beautiful land I've seen on planet earth to this day.

But yeah, Americans are out of touch with genuine, easy-going sexual polarity. Whereas those countries you mentioned (BRAZ, MEX) got that down to a tee. My buddy has been to Brazil and tells the best stories. I took a couple Brazzilian women to the bars last year in Phoenix... Holy shit they were fun. The Mexicans too.

But somehow my own people are hard to connect with and it saddens me. It's like,  "What the fuck is going on in the collective psyche here?!" I'm not here to speculate, only asking.

This part resonated: "Hope people don't get butthurt and start flinging shit at me because my perspective makes them insecure about their own decisions." I swear that's exactly it. When I talk to REAL PEOPLE face to face they have INCREDIBLE experiences to share about Korea, Brazil, etc. But then people who look up other places and only the negatives without ever buying a plane ticket think they know the world... this is basic epistemology. Direct experience vs the internet...

Anyways thanks again for sharing!

Edited yesterday at 07:48 AM by WonderSeeker

[WonderSeeker]

On 8/11/2025 at 0:53 AM, Kid A said:

@BlessedLion Really interesting reading. I rated Norway 10/10 in the "How would you rate the place you were born or live"-thread. I have realized that I made a mistake because my experience of social life in Norway is very similar to yours in America. 

Woah interesting, I'd love to hear more! 

I think scientists should research this topic of experiencing non-native cultures more.

Like I'm genuinely curious why some people just do better some places, while others suffer in different places.

[WonderSeeker]

On 8/11/2025 at 5:38 AM, samijiben said:

Any of you fuckers in Nepal by the way? Hit me up!

When I come i expect Mad Honey served to me at the temple 😋

[WonderSeeker]

On 8/13/2025 at 7:13 PM, Staples said:

@WonderSeeker Enjoy Korea. You will appreciate the break from American life.

Don't expect life to get easier just by being in another country. You will still have problems, just different problems.

No doubt. This is just the next step.

On 8/13/2025 at 1:39 PM, ryoko said:

You've got one thing right. The biome you're in have a huge effect on culture and values. What biome is SK? Did you check? You also have a really toxic tendency to generalize places as "East Asia", what you refer as East Asia are countries with so varying levels of culture and biome. Don't get tricked by how similar their faces look. 

If you are going to move to a laid back region. Goodluck. But know this, no matter where, you'll always find low conscious people. May be with different values. 

It's easy to get tricked into thinking Korea is laid back. I'm from a tropical region. I can suggest some places, if you're interested. But know that it's not gonna be compatible with what's around, integrating with any culture is bad. Best places are isolated places where you're left with no noise. 

Also people in these countries are Xenophobic to great extents. Especially the laid back people you romanticise. 

SK is my easiest foot in the door out of the US. I plan to mobilize after a year there. (I'm on a TEFL contract)

Also good reminder I totally get what you mean about generalizations. Maybe you've been, but having not gone yet I'm still exploring the nuances to each culture. Just from basic history class and reading I know where these countries came from and more or less where they stand.

But I'm not gonna pretend to know 'what' they are. Maybe you know more than me. What kinds of islands are you talking about? 

Also totally agree on the low consciousness people part. When I dated the Japanese girl in Mongolia she'd been to 3 vipassina retreats, spoke 5 languages, and worked at the U.N. Like you couldn't make this up. Still kick myself for letting that slip. But I wouldnt even say she was super aware, not that i need that in a woman I guess. High-consciousness only comes in unicorn individuals and rare pockets... not localized to any nation or city (that i know of)

Edited yesterday at 06:29 AM by WonderSeeker

[ryoko]

Tropical Islands, and Mountains, can be in anywhere, if it's isolated enough. Not referring to tourist spots. I'll come back to this. 

I read something yesterday, and I see this story everywhere, there's rebellion and the fire to get out of the system, then there's a woman who tries to contain him, she fails, but she plants the seeds of conformity in him, which later gets reaped by another woman. Take it literally or figuratively, doesn't matter.

I just feel concerned for you. Have you looked at the requirements for being a citizen of those countries? It often requires you nueter yourself literally. All countries do this, this is simply compromise with extra steps. 

About the islands and mountains I mentioned; I'm not referring to tourist spots, but, this is the sad part, these kind of places are often made into tourist spots labelled as "where people from the west come to unwind, for a few days". This is why I believe, it would be best if you're looking for such places, do it where you got some leverage. I'm not saying it isn't possible in other countries, but usually it's more convenient where you won't be disturbed by the law and people around, this is why I think you can make the most out of where you're from. America is a Big continent. I'd understand if you're in some small land locked region with not enough diversity. But that's not the case. Keep an open mind ahead.

Edited yesterday at 08:07 AM by ryoko