What is femininity ?

[Natasha Tori Maru]

@OBEler

It's simple. My statement acknowledges a truth another user raised. Imagine if my comment didn't say 'thank you' it said 'truth!'. It's a way to acknowledge the validity of a statement through dialogue and nothing more 

You are desperately looking for some way to make the dialogue feminine. Inserting some odd interpretation into it to attempt to use it as an example. If the statement was an example of feminine behaviour and you pointed it out - I would be all cool with agreeing.

Essentially you are forcing your frame of understanding into the situation without assessing the frame itself (as @Carl-Richardtried to raise) literally jamming a square peg in a round hole.

I'm not going to be convinced otherwise here. So that's that for me on the topic. 

Edited yesterday at 09:04 PM by Natasha Tori Maru

[Kid A]

17 hours ago, Emerald said:

And it also implies that her social circle is lacking in some way or that something is amiss in those areas of life, which implies drama or issues with social attachment. Otherwise, why wouldn't she just get involved with a man she already knows and can go slow with and build feelings for organically?

Because the (many) men she knows are either in relationships, not attractive enough, or not interested in her? 

Your perspective is interesting, but I just don’t quite see what’s so crazy about being attracted to a stranger—especially after talking for maybe 5–10 minutes, feeling each other’s energy, and discovering several common interests, for example.

For me, one of the worst things about living in a densely populated city is walking past thousands of people without ever interacting with any of them—unless you already know them or it’s their job to approach you. It’s like being given the greatest privilege in the world and not using it. Even though I'm an introvert, it feels pretty unnatural, and honestly, just boring. 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

58 minutes ago, Kid A said:

Your perspective is interesting, but I just don’t quite see what’s so crazy about being attracted to a stranger—especially after talking for maybe 5–10 minutes, feeling each other’s energy, and discovering several common interests, for example.

Being attracted within this space of time isn't an issue and I don't think is crazy. 

But for women, deciding to sleep with someone within that time is high risk behaviour. It's hard to understand from a male perspective, but women are so physically weak and vulnerable - especially during intimacy - it's top priority over almost everything else. 

Sometimes I wish men could flip bodies just to experience simple things like lifting a pot of boiling water and feeling the lack of strength in such a simple operative movement. 

Even getting into an uber is a risk. A calculated one. But a risk. So a women deciding to be so vulnerable in such a short timespan is a miscalculation of risk ie 'crazy' 

This is why the key to women is providing and making sure she is safe 🙂

 

[OBEler]

@Natasha Tori Maru @Natasha Tori Maru @Jirh 

I will point to you your feminine behavior (which is all good, I have nothing against that at all).You wrote by yourself that you thank him for that you can feel better. Read again what you wrote:

"And for your information, I am perfectly within my rights to thank a user for remarking I am not an emotional basket case. And for you to imply his statement is untrue, is implying I have erratic behavior."

See, it's all about you. How it makes you feeling good, what it implies to your feelings. It's not about truth. Truth is above anyones feelings. 

In a discussion I would never thank someone just because he shares the same opinion like me and is just agreeing because it doesn't add something to revealing what's true. I would thank someone who reveals whats really true, even if it implies that I am the one who is stupid and even if it makes me miserable. That's the difference between us. I am looking for truth and not someone who likes to distort reality to conform his feelings.

Edited 22 hours ago by OBEler

[Carl-Richard]

8 minutes ago, OBEler said:

@Natasha Tori Maru @Natasha Tori Maru @Jirh 

You are getting emotional now. You wrote by yourself that you thank him for that you can feel better. Read again what you wrote:

"And for your information, I am perfectly within my rights to thank a user for remarking I am not an emotional basket case. And for you to imply his statement is untrue, is implying I have erratic behavior."

See, it's all about you. How it makes you feeling good, what it implies to your feelings. It's not about truth. Truth is above anyones feelings. 

In a discussion I would never thank someone just because he shares the same opinion like me and is just agreeing because it doesn't add something to revealing what's true. I would thank someone who reveals whats really true, even if it implies that I am the one who is stupid and even if it makes me miserable. That's the difference between us. I am a man of truth and you are someone who likes to distort reality to conform your feelings.

Schizophonia: *makes true observation*

Natasha Tori Maru: "Thank you for making this true observation."

OBEler: "I would never!"

Edited 22 hours ago by Carl-Richard

[OBEler]

@Carl-Richard

she wrote this : "And for your information, I am perfectly within my rights to thank a user for remarking I am not an emotional basket case. And for you to imply his statement is untrue, is implying I have erratic behavior."

You think she thanks him for true observation? She thanks him because it saved her feelings. 

 

 

 

@Natasha Tori Maru @Jirh 

 

 

Edited 22 hours ago by OBEler

[Puer Aeternus]

15 minutes ago, OBEler said:

That's the difference between us. I am a man of truth and you are someone who likes to distort reality to conform your feelings.

Nah man, you just like categories.

You don't seem to be very flexible with them either. 

Slick edit btw, trying to cover that up lol.

[Carl-Richard]

1 minute ago, OBEler said:

@Carl-Richard

She said she wrote this : "And for your information, I am perfectly within my rights to thank a user for remarking I am not an emotional basket case. And for you to imply his statement is untrue, is implying I have erratic behavior."

You think she thanks him for true observation? She thanks him because it saved her feelings. 

@Natasha Tori Maru @Jirh 

I think it's a true observation.

[OBEler]

@Carl-Richard what? Do you even know what I want to say in my previous post?

 

[Carl-Richard]

1 minute ago, OBEler said:

@Carl-Richard what? Do you even know what I want to say in my previous post?

Loud and clear but I don't have much to add to it.

[OBEler]

@Carl-Richard then what do you mean as an answer to my question with "I think it's a true observation".

it was not questioned if schizophrenias statement is a true observation in my previous post.

[Carl-Richard]

6 minutes ago, OBEler said:

@Carl-Richard then what do you mean as an answer to my question with "I think it's a true observation".

it was not questioned if schizophrenias statement is a true observation in my previous post.

I just want women to thank me, I'm emotional that way.

Sorry, I won't troll anymore.

Edited 21 hours ago by Carl-Richard

[OBEler]

@Carl-Richard so you are joining this discussion, barely read and understand what my statements are and just joining her side so that she can thank you too (like she thanked schizophrenia for giving her emotional support)?

 

Edited 21 hours ago by OBEler

[Carl-Richard]

1 minute ago, OBEler said:

@Carl-Richard so you are joining this discussion, barely read and understand what my statements are and just joining her side so that she can thank you too (like she thanked schizophrenia to give her emotional support)?

Omg. I regret using the words I did earlier when speaking about pathology.

[OBEler]

@Carl-Richard I don't understand what you want to say man. Just let it out. Right now I see you are just trolling here but that gets annoying.

Edited 21 hours ago by OBEler

[Natasha Tori Maru]

1 hour ago, Carl-Richard said:

Schizophonia: *makes true observation*

Natasha Tori Maru: "Thank you for making this true observation."

This is the truth of the interaction.

Just because I was polite, and expressed gratitude, does not make the statement of acknowledgement any less true. Nothing 'saved my feelings' because I didn't even register an offense lol.

In any case, this is an 'agree to disagree'. @OBEler

It's. Going. No. Where. 

Just raising at no point did I, or do I, take offense. You don't need to reassure me. 

Tapping out.

 

Edited 20 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[Jirh]

@OBEler An easier argument would be that the mere thanking of the other user for his observation implies appreciation and approval, which is a facet of harmony, which is feminine.

I know you didn't tag me intentionally , but I thought I might drop by and give my opinion that it seems you're misinterpreting things just to defend your initial argument.

Natasha is clearly stating that she thanked him for speaking the truth, which is quite fair. What makes you feel that she might be untruthful about that?

[OBEler]

@Jirh because she explained in this comment why she thanked him in the first place:  "And for your information, I am perfectly within my rights to thank a user for remarking I am not an emotional basket case. And for you to imply his statement is untrue, is implying I have erratic behavior."

That looks to me she thanked him primarily for the protection of her own feelings. That doesn't look like she really wants to discover truth. She just protect herself in this discussion and doesn't want to look bad (" And for you to imply his statement is untrue, is implying I have erratic behavior.")

Edited 15 hours ago by OBEler

[UnbornTao]

Emotions are an unconscious drive for people in general, although I'm not clear on what is feeling and what is emotion. 

Edited 11 hours ago by UnbornTao

[Jirh]

@OBEler Oh, I think I understand your point better now.

And I think there are two things to consider here:

1. The truthfulness of a statement.
2. How it feels to someone.

She is saying that 1 is independent of 2 in this particular context, and you're suggesting that it's not.

So she is saying that her primary concern is truthfulness regardless of how it may feel, even though in this particular case the truth feels good.

And you're saying that since it feels good to her, then that's the main (maybe even the only) reason why she sees its truthfulness in the first place, and that otherwise she would probably not.

And while I agree that this could be the case, I don't know if it is, as I rarely come here. However, it seems like you're using a circular logic presupposing the verdict without examining the context carefully.

However, my view is that this behaviour that you're suggesting is not exclusive to feminine women. A very masculine man like Trump can lie to protect himself. So a masculine man can deny the truth to suit his feelings and agendas. Or he can be delusional. It doesn't really matter. The point is that gender and masculinity/femininity are not strictly tied with lying. It all depends on context, and making a final judgement can be difficult.

Edited 10 hours ago by Jirh