Why Women Prefer Betas

[Jirh]

Just now, Emerald said:

So, the idea of "non-toxic beta" versus "toxic alpha" just isn't really true.

Oh, yeah, absolutely! A "beta" guy can be quite toxic too in the context of a long-term relationship. I am not suggesting otherwise.

However, an "alpha" guy does not even qualify for a ltr, as he is generally not interested and cannot commit, or at best would cheat at the first opportunity.

A long term relationship is not an easy thing. It's a serious commitment that requires huge dedication and effort and responsibility. And most humans are nowhere near the "ideal partner" who knows how to communicate and compromise and has the willingness to set their ego aside and focus on the relationship instead of their own agendas. It's not easy at all.

[Puer Aeternus]

Why be alpha or beta when you can become a meta male 

41 minutes ago, Jirh said:

Oh, yeah, absolutely! A "beta" guy can be quite toxic too in the context of a long-term relationship. I am not suggesting otherwise.

 *Entitled "nice guy" heavy breathing noises intensify*

[Jannes]

9 hours ago, Emerald said:

While it's true that many women fall in with a toxic guy at some point in their lives, it's just as as easy for a "beta" guy to be toxic compared to an "alpha" guy.

NO, a beta cant get away with it, thats the point! If you are toxic you have to be powerful to overcome backlash which a beta isnt. 

[Emerald]

29 minutes ago, Jannes said:

NO, a beta cant get away with it, thats the point! If you are toxic you have to be powerful to overcome backlash which a beta isnt. 

That's just not true.

When a woman is in love with a man and hasn't yet developed self-respect and boundaries, he can get away with murder because she's so attached to him.

And you don't need to be some "alpha" guy for that to happen.

I let my first boyfriend (who I was with for 4 years ) get away with a lot of things that I would have ZERO tolerance for now... and that's because I loved him and was attached to the relationship. And I didn't want to even think about it ending.

And my first boyfriend was nowhere near alpha. He couldn't keep a job and was like 5'6" tall. He didn't work out and he was missing like half of his teeth because of poor dental hygiene growing up.

But I fell in love with him when I was 16 and he was 17. And I held onto that relationship until I was 20 despite him being a total ne'er-do-well.

[Puer Aeternus]

31 minutes ago, Jannes said:

NO, a beta cant get away with it, thats the point! If you are toxic you have to be powerful to overcome backlash which a beta isnt. 

Emerald is really right here.

You're right that "beta" men won't be able to behave like men with abundance though, and be toxic in the same ways as them. They're not getting away with that. If that's what you mean, valid.

But yeah, the average person has toxic traits, I have toxic traits. So of course they can be toxic. Yet it's not stopping them from coupling up. I swear, the amount of dysfunctional toxic people I've seen in relationships- is baffling. No offense but it makes me question how much real world experience you have with this.

[Jannes]

3 minutes ago, Emerald said:

That's just not true.

When a woman is in love with a man and hasn't yet developed self-respect and boundaries, he can get away with murder because she's so attached to him.

And you don't need to be some "alpha" guy for that to happen.

I let my first boyfriend (who I was with for 4 years ) get away with a lot of things that I would have ZERO tolerance for now... and that's because I loved him and was attached to the relationship. And I didn't want to even think about it ending.

And my first boyfriend was nowhere near alpha. He couldn't keep a job and was like 5'6" tall. He didn't work out and he was missing like half of his teeth because of poor dental hygiene growing up.

But I fell in love with him when I was 16 and he was 17. And I held onto that relationship until I was 20 despite him being a total ne'er-do-well.

I mean toxic behaviour in general to people around him. Like the "cool" high school kid who could tease everybody or even bully and who got away with it and got all the attention from girls. A beta couldnt just replicate that, he doesnt have the balls and confirmation for it. That super emotional high pressure survival container called school is over at some point of course but still at adult life these tendencies are present in more subtle ways. 

[Jannes]

5 minutes ago, Puer Aeternus said:

Emerald is really right here.

You're right that "beta" men won't be able to behave like men with abundance though, and be toxic in the same ways as them. They're not getting away with that. If that's what you mean, valid.

Yes thats what I mean. Without the same confirmation they cant be as effortlessly cocky. 

5 minutes ago, Puer Aeternus said:

But yeah, the average person has toxic traits, I have toxic traits. So of course they can be toxic. Yet it's not stopping them from coupling up. I swear, the amount of dysfunctional toxic people I've seen in relationships- is baffling. No offense but it makes me question how much real world experience you have with this.

Everybody can act good and bad from where they are.

An alpha doesnt need to be toxic btw. he can just calmly radiate high levels of confidence without hiding any shadow parts.

5 minutes ago, Puer Aeternus said:

No offense but it makes me question how much real world experience you have with this.

 What do you mean?

[Jannes]

21 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

All valid points.

A man (or woman) can choose to not commit to one person and endlessly wet their dick. Sexual novelty is really important to a lot of men.

The reason I don't judge that decision is 1) it is actually a decision, and 2) who am I to decide what is good for that person?

The issue for me is lack of foresight. Theres an assumption personal values are static. Sure, it may be good to be non-committal in the moment, indulge in hedonism. But let's tack on 50 years. Now you're a geriatric, your sex drive is lower. Sometimes the peepee don't work, and it's like sticking a marshmallow in a coin slot. Recovery time from sex is no longer minutes - it's a week or more. Your cock isn't governing your decisions like it was, or, you are mature enough to tell it 'down boy' when needed. Suddenly you want just one woman, you want closeness, intimacy, kindness. Commitment. 

There is inherent risk with any decision in life - but you need to make it a calculated one. Decide. At least then you can't just sit back and cry, and make everything a pity party 'life was so hard on me'. No, you took a risk and it didn't pay off. You gave it a hell of a go. You were a man. You HAPPENED to life, it didn't just happen to you.

This lack of foresight is woven in with many people. Whatever decision you make, you are going to miss out. That is just how life is. Compromise.

I've personally been with a man who went through this transition. He is well known online, and locally. He could have any women due to the fame and power he has. He is 63 years old (yes a large age gap, but I don't do anything by the book). His value system completely changed in the time I was with him. I am not saying this happens for every man, but you need to assess what a life looks like for you without your dick being the rudder.

I mean he did get a sweatheart in the end. This is not a really moralizing story tbh. 

21 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

BTW not talking to you directly Jannes, just expressing my views and experience.

This speaks very much to me, but all good. 

[Puer Aeternus]

@Jannes Yaya we are on the same page then  Sorry for the misunderstanding! I agree. Haha saying my concern for your lack of life experience was if you were saying average men can't get away with being generally toxic and still have romantic success, not how you actually meant it.

[meta_male]

18 hours ago, Puer Aeternus said:

Why be alpha or beta when you can become a meta male 

🤫

[integral]

All Mark had to do here was date  a mature person! (Sarcasm)

I guess it was personal preference or scarcity that made this multimillionaire date this woman. 🫠 (sarcasm)

Having to explain that reality and dating is not idealism that fits neatly into categories, like maturity and intelligence is crazy.

I guess he should’ve known from the moment he spoke to her that she didn’t meet the “maturity threshold” before he fell in love with her

@Emerald

Edited June 16 by integral

[Puer Aeternus]

1 hour ago, meta_male said:

🤫

HE'S REALLY REAL!!! 

[RendHeaven]

On 6/15/2025 at 11:32 AM, Natasha Tori Maru said:

but you need to assess what a life looks like for you without your dick being the rudder.

Impossible. We shall steer with cock and balls to the bitter end!

I would literally kill myself if my dick permanently stopped working.

If we were to do trial by combat, a really easy way to take me out is to just stab my dick because in that half-second, I will lose all morale, my whole aura will deflate, and I would just slowly lay down my sword with a sigh and wait for you to finish the job without resistance

[meta_male]

@Puer Aeternus Let them wake slow. No need to scare the sleepers.

[Puer Aeternus]

I shall discretely respond with affirmation as not further expose you to the public eye 

[Puer Aeternus]

1 hour ago, RendHeaven said:

Impossible. We shall steer with cock and balls to the bitter end!

Respectfully sir, you can do much better than dick rudder in this life time. Personally, I've been swinging and practicing the art of..

 

 

[RendHeaven]

2 hours ago, Puer Aeternus said:

Respectfully sir, you can do much better than dick rudder in this life time. Personally, I've been swinging and practicing the art of..

 

 

Bro's levitating

[Puer Aeternus]

1 hour ago, RendHeaven said:

Bro's levitating

People always think that, my pants are too baggy for them to know it's just my helikopter.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

12 hours ago, RendHeaven said:

Impossible. We shall steer with cock and balls to the bitter end!

I would literally kill myself if my dick permanently stopped working.

If we were to do trial by combat, a really easy way to take me out is to just stab my dick because in that half-second, I will lose all morale, my whole aura will deflate, and I would just slowly lay down my sword with a sigh and wait for you to finish the job without resistance

This cock rudder analogy is getting out of control 😂

Cock n balls steer the way!

[Emerald]

12 hours ago, integral said:

All Mark had to do here was date  a mature person! (Sarcasm)

I guess it was personal preference or scarcity that made this multimillionaire date this woman. 🫠 (sarcasm)

Having to explain that reality and dating is not idealism that fits neatly into categories, like maturity and intelligence is crazy.

I guess he should’ve known from the moment he spoke to her that she didn’t meet the “maturity threshold” before he fell in love with her

@Emerald

I was just asking you why you prepare yourself to date immature women... and whether it's preference or scarcity thinking.

Personally, I haven't found it difficult to find mature men or women. They do exist... in spades.

So, in my mind, I wanted to know why you're preparing yourself to date immature women... when you could just raise your standards and sort those women from consideration.

Sure, someone could always fall in love with an immature person. That could happen to anyone.

But my question is more along the lines of why you made the earlier statement around expecting to date immature women and planning and preparing as such. 

To me, it just came across as an indicator of scarcity mindset and preemptively not sorting out immature women from your dating pool... or as an indicator of a preference to date immature women.