Balance, a principle for happy living

[Davino]

I've been working on living better. Which decisions to take at every moment and what leads to my personal happiness or disconnection.

A core principle I've recognised is balance. This is the key to a good life, by finding the right equilibrium at every moment and in your life in general, is that you can sustain longer periods of wellbeing and contentment.

[Davino]

How can I be more balanced in my life?

How can I be more balanced now? Am I too tense or too relaxed?

What activities throw me out of balance? Why?

What activities get me into a nice inner balance?

How can my room be more in equilibrium?

What parts of my life are more out of balance?

What is the type of balance that I need in my life?

Edited May 5 by Davino

[Yimpa]

 

[UnbornTao]

@Davino I haven't looked into that principle but it may be useful to start with balance as a physical dynamic, since that helps us ground the investigation. For example what does it take for the body to be balanced? What creates balance? Also, as some of your questions might be implying, is balance a function of external things, or is it more about you and your relationship to things? Something to think about! Please share what comes to mind.

[Carl-Richard]

On 5.5.2025 at 10:08 PM, Davino said:

How can I be more balanced in my life?

How can I be more balanced now? Am I too tense or too relaxed?

What activities throw me out of balance? Why?

What activities get me into a nice inner balance?

How can my room be more in equilibrium?

What parts of my life are more out of balance?

What is the type of balance that I need in my life?

Balance is largely synonymous with holism: you want to not just focus on one thing, but many things, and you want them to exist in proportion to each other so they serve a greater whole. What the balance should be is dictated by the whole. What is a human? What does a human need?

What I might add is that humans "need" or are capable of focus, so that some things take more space or serve you more than others. That could for example be what life purpose is, or pursuing your passions. So balance doesn't have to be rigidly egalitarian, but again serving a higher telos, the whole.

Edited May 8 by Carl-Richard

[Ramanujan]

balance is a lie. Magic happens in the extreme

 

for more details , look into the book one thing by jay papasan

Edited May 8 by Ramanujan

[Norbert Somogyi]

1 hour ago, Ramanujan said:

balance is a lie. Magic happens in the extreme

 

for more details , look into the book one thing by jay papasan

Take a look around the world, and look where the extreme has brought us.

War, famine, sickness, pandemics, genocides. Deforestation, melting icecaps, extinct species, decaying coral reefs, oceanic dead-zones, desertification of certain lands, depleted soil, PFAs contaminated rainwater, microplastics, plastic islands on the ocean, contaminated fish. Dying cultures and eroding languages.

Addictions, cancer, mental disorders, obesity, diabetes, heart-attack, existential crises, families torn apart, traumas everywhere (granted we just started to learn how they work like 150 years ago), critically low attention-spans due to dependence on technology, thinking and survival skills forgotten. 

This is just the tip of the iceberg. To be honest I find it incredibly fascinating how much our body is capable of enduring.

Therefore I wouldn't say, that balance is a lie. I apologize for the derailing rant, just wanted to put this one out.

[Norbert Somogyi]

Moving onto the topic of balance, I've been contemplating on it.

Is it always ideal to seek balance, aren't there states from which it is better to step out? Things like low-energy and low-conscious states (more like phases, because as states they can appear anytime). I understand they are inherently less compatible and less likely to facilite a search for balance - but this is where I would consider spiritual bypassing to rise. Which in my opinion is a misguided search for balance, or at least ill-timed - given how much emotional baggage can be swept under the rug and kept there for an unnecessarily long time - instead of letting them rise to the surface and allowing them to be expressed.

How does someone balance the various motivations and desires that are pulling our psyches around as we interact with the world? How does one balance perspectives when one of them is pulling so hard you can barely resist. Is it better to resist, or is it better to let things happen as they need to and live out the perspectives before coming back to the earth? Meaning, is it always better to strive to learn from others' mistakes, or are there situations where it is best to just jump into? How does someone even determine when it is better to seek balance and when it is better to just jump into the chaos and let the flow take over? Is it necessary to determine beforehand? I've got so many questions to ponder on, one more being

Should Thanos win?

As I am contemplating and pondering on these, I'm forming a visual model or representation of basically all the above in my head. I will share later on, as it matures.

[BlessedLion]

On 5/5/2025 at 2:28 PM, Davino said:

I've been working on living better. Which decisions to take at every moment and what leads to my personal happiness or disconnection.

A core principle I've recognised is balance. This is the key to a good life, by finding the right equilibrium at every moment and in your life in general, is that you can sustain longer periods of wellbeing and contentment.

It’s an important and fundamental contemplation. For everyone it’s different. 
 

I also question, “what does balance actually look like” 

 

For myself I’m most stable and even keeled when I quit stimulation, things like coffee, porn, scrolling and alcohol- but then I ask is there a place for these things. I still am not sure. Because what is balance? Maybe balance is cutting them all out, and I know our mainstream culture would push that balance is including them, but as time goes on my definition of balance is changing. 
 

Maybe balance is being balanced in your nervous system and having time for nature walks, socializing, reading, and creativity. Because if we define balance as having a balanced system, then cutting out stimulation is a must 

[BlessedLion]

11 hours ago, Carl-Richard said:

Balance is largely synonymous with holism: you want to not just focus on one thing, but many things, and you want them to exist in proportion to each other so they serve a greater whole. What the balance should be is dictated by the whole. What is a human? What does a human need?

What I might add is that humans "need" or are capable of focus, so that some things take more space or serve you more than others. That could for example be what life purpose is, or pursuing your passions. So balance doesn't have to be rigidly egalitarian, but again serving a higher telos, the whole. Or in other words, focus should be a part of the balance, as it's a part of being human.

Good answer, I like this definition. If we define balance as solely parts of a whole serving that whole then societies standard definition of balance is silly (have a beer here, watch some porn there-just examples) but these things (imo) are purely detrimental with no value, if you really contemplate them and experiment you’ll see this. 
 

So with utter discipline you are left with balancing those things that benefit the whole- (what’s is the “whole” ? Your emotions, your vision, your purpose, God?) I believe the whole is your purpose which is = God, and Vision and a byproduct is high emotions. 
 

Balancing them becomes seeing each part- habit, study, creation, as an integral part of the whole. There is a hierarchy however, maybe 60% importance to creativity, 20% spiritual practice 10% social and sexual 10% to physical and so on. 
 

A beautiful contemplation 

[Yimpa]

Edited May 9 by Yimpa

[Lyubov]

Look into Taoism. It’s one of the best teachings for balance. Also look into yin  and yang. Very powerful and transformative stuff if you want to live a practical life that’s also deeply spiritual. 

[BlessedLion]

@Lyubov I’ll check it out 

 

Upon further reflection it seems balance is secondary to discovery. You must first discover what produces an effective and powerful life (FOR YOU) and then balance those key components out. Do you meditate 6 hours per day leaving only a few for work, social, health, and study? Unbalanced! 
 

So it’s not only an elimination of distraction like alcohol porn and scrolling (these factors only make the ice more slippery) you need all the help you can get to balance the powerful principles in your life. 
 

It makes sense to me now. I feel I understand what balance truly is 

[Yimpa]

7 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

Love is Infinite Balance.

If you think you can outbalance God, you are tripping infinitely down a pit of self-deception.

Edited May 9 by Yimpa

[Davino]

On 8/5/2025 at 4:26 PM, Ramanujan said:

balance is a lie. Magic happens in the extreme

You can be extremely balanced.

Certainly extreme unbalance is not desirable and must be corrected. Even if a simple parametre like your ph is unbalanced you die. 

So ironically if you wanna be extreme in a pursuit it's equally important to strike the right balance, otherwise you burn yourself and quit or torture yourself to success by destroying your health and other areas of your life.

I'm advocating for a personal and sophisticated balance.

[Davino]

@Norbert Somogyi To me balance is not about repressing fragments of our psyche by the "CEO" archetype and to push further aside shadow work to keep the ongoing momentum. For me balance it's all about leting every part of my self and shadow to have a seat at the table of my mind. Maybe it’s not either resist or surrender, but a third path: relating. What part of yourself are you not letting speak in the table? That's what is causing the imbalance. And after so much resistance, that disowned part of you rebels and steers the wheel of your life for a while; next morning the sun shines and you say: Oh what have I done? And then back again the CEO kicks him out of the table. Does this sound familiar brother?

You have to bring balance to your inner world and how to properly do that only you can say. Also consider shadow work is a very broad and personal subject and the metaprinciple of balance may not be detailed enough to handle all of its nuances.

[Yimpa]

1 minute ago, Davino said:

And then back again the CEO kicks him out of the table. Does this sound familiar brother?

As long as the CEO is above you, that will always be the case.

[Davino]

On 6/5/2025 at 1:19 AM, UnbornTao said:

For example what does it take for the body to be balanced? What creates balance?

I'd say it's the adaptive process of harmonizing all forces to perform a desired task in a unified and efficient way.

On 6/5/2025 at 1:19 AM, UnbornTao said:

Also, as some of your questions might be implying, is balance a function of external things, or is it more about you and your relationship to things?

In my opinion, at every level balance happens because it's the interplay of polar opposites. Balance happens in multiplicity and it's a property of the intelligence of life. So the bottleneck of how we are able to properly balance our life and enhance our wellbeing may be intelligence and consciousness but it's balance what grounds it into action and life.

[Davino]

6 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

As long as the CEO is above you, that will always be the case.

But you are the CEO and so is the shadow. It's really you. I am all of my inner pieces. It's just that we are all fragmented and seeking inner reunification.

In the perfect world the CEO, the lover, the artist, the darkness, every figment of you gets integrated into a complete individual and hence you would complete the process of "individuation" as Jung stated or wholeness as I prefer to state it. Although in my view, there's no end to human development, as parts of my inner self just restructurate into higher holarchies of wholeness ad infinitum.

[Davino]

@BlessedLion Pleasure is a part of life as well. One should balance dopamine and serotonine. Although our society may be so out of balance with dopamine that the balancing tendency is to quit many sources of artificial dopamine.

I like this quote from a sage man:

Quote

Questioner: But man does not live for pleasure.

Shivapuri Baba: One should not live for pleasure; but, if it comes, it should not be rejected also. Pleasure will give satisfaction if it is accepted without being sought for.