Are girls the lonelier sex?

[Schizophonia]

8 hours ago, Hojo said:

Look at whos killing themselves. Why do people kill themselves? Because they are lonely and have no hope. Men are lonelier they just wont admit it because we are trained to not admit it. If you ask a man and a woman if they are sad and they are equally sad a woman will say they are sad first and the man will wallow in sadness and say hes fine. A man knows there is no one there to help his sadness a woman thinks there is.

People rarely commit suicidal just for loneliness.

It asks terrible conditions, like depression, cluster headache, severe insomnia, cancer, PTSD…

Edited November 24, 2024 by Schizophonia

[Yimpa]

3 hours ago, Peo said:

When your consiousness expands on psychedelics you will feel true loneliness. When you realise your all alone in this world. Women should stay away from psychedelics if they feel lonely sober. 

I think you are confusing feeling lost with feeling connected. 

Can confirm that both can be the case after taking psychedelics.

Edited November 25, 2024 by Yimpa

[Emerald]

4 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Your explaination does not account for why women are more social than men.

Women are more social because their survival requires it.

Men's survival also requires it. No human being is exempt from our collectivist nomadic wiring.

And the bottom three rungs of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs (which your channel is named for) have always been met through existing within a community. 

Men did not evolve in different circumstances than women. To say that women need social connection and that men don't, is like saying women need food and men don't.

Every single man (prior to a couple hundred years ago) who survived and went on to reproduce lived a life that was deeply intertwined with a community of people. And the more socially adapted a man was, the more likely he was to reproduce.

Men today are less social because they have more of a capacity to ignore their needs and disconnect because men are encouraged to be stoic and disconnect from their feelings and needs, while women are more generally more in touch with the goings-on of our nervous system and sensitized to their feelings.

And my conjecture is that men tend to have more of this emotional disconnection capacity because men who tended to be the ones that would need to kill animals and other people to provide and go to war for the community. So, there is a built-in capacity for emotional numbing when circumstances call for it.

But just because a man has that built in Novocaine to help him go unconscious to his emotions and needs, doesn't mean he doesn't have those emotions and needs. He can just go selectively unaware of his emotions and needs for short periods of time if the situation calls for it. 

It's the same way that, if you numbed your hand and stuck it down on a hot stove... you may not feel the pain but the harm is still being done.

The issue with the way things are is that men tend to be fed with ideas about how to be Masculine that focuses on rugged individualism and personal achievement. 

And in a more individualistically oriented society where there is the possibility of getting our physical needs met without social connection, men might have less of a tendency to seek out connection because of these hyper-individualistic achievement-oriented tendencies that are enforced by the culture.

But it's really clear if you look around the men are collectively hurting a lot more than women are by a hyper-individualistic society... precisely because they don't feel their hand resting on the hot stove as much as women do.

[Hojo]

@Schizophonia Depressions is loneliness of the self. The self is not there anymore the person gets upset because they are in a body with no identity. It is sadness of losing God.

 

Edited November 24, 2024 by Hojo

[EternalForest]

Women get more quantity but its more difficult for them to translate it into quality because a good chunk of the guys contacting just want sex and a good chunk of the girls contacting are being nice out of politeness and don't form deeper connections. Men have the advantage in the sense that, even though they have less people around them, the ones that are there are more likely to genuinely want to be there.

"I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone."-Robin Williams

[Emerald]

4 hours ago, Raze said:

But studies find girls are better at reading non verbal cues and emotional states indicating the evolved to be more socially aware then men 

Yes, women tend to be more socially aware than men on average. We are better at socializing as an aggregate... partially due to nature and partially due to nurture.

But just because men aren't as good at meeting their social needs compared to women, doesn't mean they need them less. In fact, they might potentially need them more BECAUSE they aren't as good at socializing. 

It's kind of like if humanity evolved into a form where people needed to be constantly lifting really heavy weights to get by, women might struggle to adapt to such a society quite a bit more than men. And they may require more outside assistance.

The same thing is true with connection and men. Connection is a heavier weight for men to lift. And it's evident to me that men are struggling to adapt to hyper-individualistic society far more than women are... precisely because women on the whole have greater levels of talent with regard to social connection.

I know a great many people that I've met as friends and as clients in my role as a coach. And 8 times out of 10, it is the men who are struggling the most with loneliness and connection. 

And there was a study that came out of older men and women whose spouses passed away.

And when the women's husbands died, the women were still able to keep themselves together and live full social lives.

The men, on the other hand, really fell apart and became isolated and struggled to care for themselves and their homes when their wives passed away.

Now, this could be because they were studying a populace that had a clear delineation in the man's and woman's roles. And women had learned to socialize, cook, clean, and all that other stuff that's necessary to maintain a quality of life. While men had learned more individualistic achievement-oriented skills like working and making money, which became less relevant upon old age and retirement.

But when we think of socializing only as something women need and we don't teach men how to connect and the importance of finding community, it is men that end up suffering for that misconception.

[Princess Arabia]

2 hours ago, Schizophonia said:

People rarely commit suicidal just for loneliness.

It asks terrible conditions, like depression, cluster headache, severe insomnia, cancer, PTSD…

I don't agree with this. What you mentioned, except for depression and PTSD are physical ailments of the body. People will go through a physical ailment with more strength than a mental incapacitation. You mentioned depression; that can be caused from a feeling of loneliness. Many tines I've heard, especially men, say if they had the courage to they would kill themselves over not having a gf or an intimate partner. In fact, many probably do. The fact that it's been said indicates that it's probable that some have.

Old people committing suicide is also on the rise because of loneliness. All their friends and family died off leaving them all alone. That's just one reason. I find people will fight their diseases quicker than to deal with the crippling effect of feeling lonely. That feeling usually comes after many attempts to avoid it and then the hopelessness kicks in after they've exhausted their attempts. People can still feel lonely being around others. It's because it's not the lack of others that's causing it, it's the mind's interpretation of what it's like to not feel lonely. When that's not met, people or no people will still bring on the effects.

[Princess Arabia]

30 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Yes, women tend to be more socially aware than men on average. We are better at socializing as an aggregate... partially due to nature and partially due to nurture.

But just because men aren't as good at meeting their social needs compared to women, doesn't mean they need them less. In fact, they might potentially need them more BECAUSE they aren't as good at socializing. 

It's kind of like if humanity evolved into a form where people needed to be constantly lifting really heavy weights to get by, women might struggle to adapt to such a society quite a bit more than men. And they may require more outside assistance.

The same thing is true with connection and men. Connection is a heavier weight for men to lift. And it's evident to me that men are struggling to adapt to hyper-individualistic society far more than women are... precisely because women on the whole have greater levels of talent with regard to social connection.

I know a great many people that I've met as friends and as clients in my role as a coach. And 8 times out of 10, it is the men who are struggling the most with loneliness and connection. 

And there was a study that came out of older men and women whose spouses passed away.

And when the women's husbands died, the women were still able to keep themselves together and live full social lives.

The men, on the other hand, really fell apart and became isolated and struggled to care for themselves and their homes when their wives passed away.

Now, this could be because they were studying a populace that had a clear delineation in the man's and woman's roles. And women had learned to socialize, cook, clean, and all that other stuff that's necessary to maintain a quality of life. While men had learned more individualistic achievement-oriented skills like working and making money, which became less relevant upon old age and retirement.

But when we think of socializing only as something women need and we don't teach men how to connect and the importance of finding community, it is men that end up suffering for that misconception.

Makes a whole lot of sense to me. The dying of the spouse part, especially. I can see how that can be the case.

[Whitney Edwards]

6 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Your explaination does not account for why women are more social than men.

Women are more social because their survival requires it.

Men are more social than women because their survival entirely depends on it. Men need jobs and work. They can't be sitting at home making pancakes. Remember men had to be hunter gatherers. They have this bro culture. Men had to be friendlier with other men to survive together despite competing with each other. Men also need to socialize more because guess what, they need women to pass on their genes which is nothing but survival. Men get frustrated without women. So men go out and cold approach women. Don't kid yourself. It's men who are much more social than women. Women were largely dependent on men financially through centuries. They just needed one man to settle down with. And spent most of their time just cooking, taking care of the man and raising kids. Most women spend their entire lives in loneliness because when the husband is not home or kids are away, the woman of the house has nobody to talk to. 

It's women who are lonelier than men. And you visited clubs, women come there only because they feel lonely. 

 

[Princess Arabia]

25 minutes ago, Buck Edwards said:

Men are more social than women because their survival entirely depends on it. Men need jobs and work. They can't be sitting at home making pancakes. Remember men had to be hunter gatherers. They have this bro culture. Men had to be friendlier with other men to survive together despite competing with each other. Men also need to socialize more because guess what, they need women to pass on their genes which is nothing but survival. Men get frustrated without women. So men go out and cold approach women. Don't kid yourself. It's men who are much more social than women. Women were largely dependent on men financially through centuries. They just needed one man to settle down with. And spent most of their time just cooking, taking care of the man and raising kids. Most women spend their entire lives in loneliness because when the husband is not home or kids are away, the woman of the house has nobody to talk to. 

It's women who are lonelier than men. And you visited clubs, women come there only because they feel lonely. 

 

Agree with everything except for the last sentence. Girls just wanna have fun. I do agree with the socializing part. I've been in bars and clubs quite a bit and my work depends on it. Looking back, I can see where  more men gathered together and the women were mostly, not all the times with other men. The ones who were mostly by themselves (just women) were there amongst each other. The men were looking to socialize more. Men will hang out for socialization more and women to just be out for the sake of being out.

This is just generalizing and is not in all cases, of course. I'm speaking from my own personal experiences. You will see this on holidays, special days like St Patrick Day, Cinco De Mayo, Memorial Day, Labor Day, Super Bowl, Work conventions, the list goes on. Men are very social creatures. Women too, but not any more than men; infact, i see it to be the opposite. Go in any local bar and count. You'll see more men drinking it up and chit chatting or watching the game or playing pool. It's very rate you might see a bunch of women together at a local bar without men. Night clubs are a different crowd. Everybody has these days. Not everyone will go hang out at local bars after they get pass a certain age and have outgrown the nightclub scene. Not to mention golf clubs and all those kinds of events that men created to get out of the house to socialize and call it relaxation. 

Edited November 25, 2024 by Princess Arabia

[Whitney Edwards]

2 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

You'll see more men drinking it up and chit chatting or watching the game or playing pool. It's very rate you might see a bunch of women together at a local bar without men.

This exact here. 

[Yimpa]

*nonbinary has left the chat*

[Basman]

6 hours ago, EternalForest said:

Women get more quantity but its more difficult for them to translate it into quality because a good chunk of the guys contacting just want sex and a good chunk of the girls contacting are being nice out of politeness and don't form deeper connections. Men have the advantage in the sense that, even though they have less people around them, the ones that are there are more likely to genuinely want to be there.

"I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone."-Robin Williams

This reflects my experience as well. Girls will mingle more easily but that doesn't necessarily translate into deep relationships. The couple of male friend relationships I have are ironclad and are effortless to maintain.

[AION]

People don't understand that men and women have completely different brains, chemistry and hormones. And their interface of reality is completely different. For example if you are a hot woman you want to get penetrated but as a guy that feeling is a totally alien feeling for you, and visa-versa.

Edited November 25, 2024 by AION

[Princess Arabia]

5 hours ago, AION said:

if you are a hot woman you want to get penetrated but as a guy that feeling is a totally alien feeling for you, and visa-versa.

Maybe more years and maybe more experiences will or may not reveal to you that this is only a belief system, assumptions and speculations. When you meet that hot girl who hates penetration and that guy that gets excited with a finger up his butt(not gay), you'll change your mind. Until then, keep speculating, just don't be surprised when it happens because I told you so.

Another thing, it's the fat ugly woman (whatever race) that craves penetration more than the hot chick. Ever seen that black dude with the big fat white chick on the beach in the funny memes and he's getting his green card through her...lol or go to a Chippendale male strip club you'll see a bunch of fat ugly women upfront screaming at those male gay guy bulges fantasizing about getting laid. 

[Tenebroso]

Men and Women are lonely for different reasons, why is it a competition.

[Basman]

32 minutes ago, Tenebroso said:

Men and Women are lonely for different reasons, why is it a competition.

If its a competition then I'm going to win.

[Schizophonia]

16 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

I don't agree with this. What you mentioned, except for depression and PTSD are physical ailments of the body. People will go through a physical ailment with more strength than a mental incapacitation. You mentioned depression; that can be caused from a feeling of loneliness. Many tines I've heard, especially men, say if they had the courage to they would kill themselves over not having a gf or an intimate partner. In fact, many probably do. The fact that it's been said indicates that it's probable that some have.

Old people committing suicide is also on the rise because of loneliness. All their friends and family died off leaving them all alone. That's just one reason. I find people will fight their diseases quicker than to deal with the crippling effect of feeling lonely. That feeling usually comes after many attempts to avoid it and then the hopelessness kicks in after they've exhausted their attempts. People can still feel lonely being around others. It's because it's not the lack of others that's causing it, it's the mind's interpretation of what it's like to not feel lonely. When that's not met, people or no people will still bring on the effects.

Being sad, depressed is unfortunate but nothing to do with physical torture.

Is also different from actual, severe depression who is a neurological disorder, in which you even barely can take a shower.

Men don’t kill themselves because they can’t have a gf, they just over complain.

[Princess Arabia]

40 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Men don’t kill themselves because they can’t have a gf, they just over complain.

Tell that to these family members that this incel was just over complaining. Just one extreme example of which there are others that didn't take other's lives along with their own.

[Schizophonia]

2 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

Tell that to these family members that this incel was just over complaining. Just one extreme example of which there are others that didn't take other's lives along with their own.

ER was traumatised and severely neurotic in general.

It’s not just being an incel, it was the straw that broke the camel's back.