Bubba66

Member
  • Content count

    25
  • Joined

  • Last visited

3 Followers

About Bubba66

  • Rank
    Newbie

Recent Profile Visitors

883 profile views
  1. What are your top three highest impact, most authentic, and most engaging habits you have explored so far? What do you plan to keep doing regardless of course-demands and social obligations ?? (yes it is healthy to have these in school) For me, my top three habits that make me actually excited to start each day is: 1) fun outdoor workout. Sprint up hill, climb trees, outdoor chores, rock climbing. 2) Creative writing; I alternate from vision exercises, research on my business, or simply writing a story or song lyrics. No matter the intent; I write in a self-reflective way for 1 hour every single day. I use Onenote for my “commonplace book” (see Leos video on that) 3) take 10 minutes to break the day up into 90 minute segments; plan breaks and implement a “hard stop” time. This is usually 5:30pm for me; past this point, I free read and play guitar. I work part time, school full time (between both about 60hrs of obligations per week); and I feel like these 3 habits give me that feeling of free time I am always looking for. After implementing them, my mood and creativity increased, and my fitness habit is consistent bc I personalized it to be fun for me. just some ideas there, hope they help! Good luck in school!
  2. Realizing a DEEP Self-deception, check this one for yourself... It has been stressed in many actualized.org videos over the years, including the more recent metaphysical topics like holism and integrity. All of personal development work starts with a direct experience of it. Recently, I became aware in a startling way of a self-deception that went DEEP with regards to my internet use, including this website. It is that I would walk "down the path of unearned wisdom"-- renounce my actual level of development (stage orange, getting good at basic survival, pursuing relationships), in return for a phony sense of pride in "stage yellow thinking abilities," just because I heard someone talk about meditation for an hour. Owning this work requires self-honesty first. Self-honesty is a decision you make not once, not temporarily while listening to Leo for an hour or two, but Every Single Day, three or four times a day or more. Honesty starts with a situational awareness of where your needs deficiencies are; because these holes will be the exact traps you fall into on your way to self-actualization. You are deficient in sex? Guess what you will always have problems with, despite your bank account status. You are deficient in physical health and fitness? Guess what you will always be tempted by (food), or what will restrict your growth pattern (body ailments/ confidence issues)? Own your deficiencies, your subtle addictions, and your bad habits. Watch them carefully, and suffer honestly. This is the foundational honesty from which all else good is built. My personal action steps in light of this situation are as follows: Mission: total self-acceptance 1. Contemplate my actual needs deficiencies, flaws, and daily addictions (subtle and gross). Journal on "Maslow's hierarchy of needs" every day for 30 minutes. 2. Keep an energy log, measure my mind state along "self-awareness", "alertness", and "flow/engagement" on a scale of 0-5. Measure these at each meal and before bedtime, with a brief note of what you are doing/ eating at each interval. 3. Keep a tension log, measure my mind state along "Restlessness or cravings," "Uncertainty, fear," and "fatigue, lack of clarity" on a scale of 0-5. Measure these at each meal and before bedtime, with a brief note of what you are doing/ eating at each interval. 4. Review these energy logs every Sunday, and write out "what works" and "what is not working." I invented this protocol for myself. I did not need a coach, a video, or a book. I simply sat down and contemplated what my highest impact personal development initiative should be for the time being. It can be hard to take the first step, so I would suggest to just pick a model of prioritization and try it out for a month. I chose Maslow's for now because it resonates. Others might choose spiral dynamics, or choose a different model entirely. This work is highly customizable (which is the cool part). One step at a time, choosing the highest impact experiments I have also become directly aware that Simplicity is key. Complexity fails. The proof of this revealed itself in the first week of this exercise. I found after only one week of trying several other "missions" at once. I tried to "take ownership of my fitness," and address my relationship deficiencies, and address my school/career development needs--- all at once. I failed to take action. I fell into an unconscious loop of distractions. I even lashed out at people I cared for, from the overwhelm and guilt of procrastination (procrastination is a deep and pernicious cycle of behavior for me, I will be searching for a root cure authentic to my needs soon). So I stuck to ONE mission for now: total self-acceptance. I defined a time frame to measure the results: at the end of this month. I found my state of mind changed completely with self-awareness at the helm of my decisions, rather than unquestioned impulses (procrastination, stimulation, distraction mechanisms: including Leo's videos). Sometimes, you eat an elephant one bite at a time, and climb the pyramid of "needs" one step On a final note, I have an interesting metaphor for listening to this content or any content authentically: In life you start out in the center of a corn maze. Here is where your authentic thoughts dwell, where you and your friends laugh and relate. it is where you are really at, developmentally. Here burns a pyre of home, of authenticity, for better or worse. Then, someone tells you to see if there is a way out of the maze, so you say "I am open minded" and you start down a pathway in the corn. Before you know it, you are in a completely different place in the corn, for better or for worse. You might even like this spot in the corn maze better than your starting point. But when the sun sets and it is getting dark out (life gets hard and challenges YOUR EGO, not Leo's thoughts and opinions) shit gets real. The wolves are howling in the dark, and you feel anxious as though you are being watched. You realize you are completely lost without a way back. You have this anxiety because you walked the path of Unearned Wisdom with a Bright Red Tether back to where you started. Tie that Red Tether to your original thinking on a subject, before you tread down a path of new ideas. With this approach, you can entertain a path without getting lost and losing who you were to begin with. This is your end of the bargain when entertaining new ideas. If you do the work to avoid getting lost, and trace your steps back to your thoughts on a subject after you listen to a lecture, podcast or actualized video; before long you will find that all progress you make on your way out of the maze will be authentic to you.
  3. @peqkno thank you! This is exactly what I was hoping for in throwing a line out here! Great suggestions. What I mean by outdated may just be insecurity about a publication date older than 5 years; some academic PTSD about using good quality resources I am sure. @Leo Gura I probably was not clear, but I aim to research coaching the demographic of adolescents and college-aged people; not necessarily coach training geared for this population. This age range is ripe for discovering wisdom that can be gained through proper introspection, grounded in evidence-based psychology (I assume most coaching practice is evidence based, right?) My life purpose is born out of a passion for improving the lives of people who feel lost in public education. I became a nurse so that people take my credential seriously and trust my sources; and so that I know professional tact on some level. This purpose requires more than “improved guidance counseling”; it requires a systematic approach to coaching and mentoring young people who want more out of life. I am not a cheapskate btw, I am interested in iPEC’s training. I value learning things with discipline and structure. I am preparing by studying up and saving up. I was that kid who wanted more out of life when I started college four years ago; and thats right when I found Actualized.org. Pretty good fortune there; but personal development could become a standard, not left up to chance.
  4. What are some examples of quality life coaching resources online, specific to the adolescents and college age range? I am interested in the actual practice of coaching as it is applied in person or by phone/skype, and would find YouTube or web recommendations useful. More specifically, I would love to know if there is a high quality resource with Coaching Case Studies, which are pretty much summarized scenarios based off of real coaching practice, that I can reliably study and learn from. There are some inauthentic case studies out there used as marketing tools. I am not interested in that sort of thing. My purpose in asking is to help me understand the utility and practical application of "coaching", and further define the difference between coaching and therapy in my own mind. Coaching is going to be one tool I use in my life's work, and I have decided to turn to this forum for help in investigating it further. Currently, I am reading some of the books on the book list, which do seem helpful but a little outdated. Any book suggestions would be awesome as well. I understand that there are coaching programs out there that would readily provide this information and training. I am not looking for information behind any sort of pay wall at this time. I don't discount the value of these programs, but I also do not intend to spend $9000 on IPEC training right now.
  5. Congratulations, you are partaking in the purest form of free speech, and a form of modern philosophy. I did standup for three years on and off again, started the very same time that you did actually, in 2016. I rarely went up on stage with a script. I dont know how you feel about scripting your jokes, but times when I "killed it" I did so without a script, and with a recent and relevant anecdote from my life. Something that really helps me is to reflect on the type of people who laugh at my jokes: are they your friends who like to set things on fire? Are they your buddies from Law School with a dry sense of humor? Are they your siblings who laugh at your physical expense? This tells you your joke content and style (physical-pratt humor, Ryan Renolds-paced wit, Jerry Seinfeld story-telling, George Carlin Nihilism, Etc.). Really sit down and journal or ask yourself about WHO you are usually making laugh in your day to day, and then pretend to be speaking to that person once you are on stage. This also plays into that old public speaking rule of "speak to one person at a time, and you will do fine." Think about which is more fun and less stressful: trying to make your best friend laugh for ten minutes, or trying to make a whole crowd of strangers laugh. Also remember the Legend Steve Martin: Props, wit, music, and hell, even a skit or powerpoint presentation can be damn funny. Its the ultimate art form, left up to you and your audience's interpretation.
  6. Also, people are dynamic creatures. Just because they work a "mundane" job and lack the knowledge of who Joseph Campbell was, does not mean that they are less human and creative than you or I. It means they make a different series of decisions, day in and day out, which then shapes their perceptions and abilities. This sort of thing can change, and it is the purpose of this website: to help break people out of the matrix called "unconscious living." Be careful in oversimplifying a whole segment of the population. Instead, see yourself in others, and acknowledge the difference in decisions you each make, and that really high quality communication can often guide people to the insights you find so valuable in your own life.
  7. @PepperBlossoms I asked a similar question four years ago when Leo started this Forum. I asked "Why are some people ok with living mechanically, while becoming more conscious is always an option." I asked it of myself as well as those more "traditional" folks around me. Leo responded with something like "this work is really about killing yourself. You still think this is a game, but once you realize this, you will quit." To me, this was a little severe and dramatic, but it does hint at a clue to the question: Why are some people ok with NPC lives? Why aren't more people the Hero? If I may play "traditionalist's advocate" for a moment... I once listened to my friend's dad grumble about going to work one morning. He does a pretty important but traditionalist job, working in transportation of rocket fuels. I asked him point blank why he didn't try and find a career he was less stressed about. His answer was, "Somebody's gotta do it". Really think about this statement, and all that it says. this one sentence alone uncovers years of limiting beliefs constructed over time. It is absolutely true that we need hard working people who will support the infrastructure as such. There are problems every day behind the scenes that we are fortunate enough to ignore because of these individuals. Without Plumbers, we would have a hepatitis-ridden population. Without Nurses, we might very well have people dying in the streets. Without Coroners we would have dead people in the streets (yikes, I'm feeling morbid for the holiday I guess). Without Powerline workers, I'm pretty sure we would not be posting to this forum from our computers. To put this in simpler terms, you should consider re-watching (or watching if you haven't) Leo's video on Survival, and then his Self-deception series back to back this week. It will remind you of a few core principles that direct human behavior. That said, also acknowledge the crucial work that more traditionalist people play. I personally work as a Registered Nurse, and play my part in the infrastructure that way. I do approach my career with new innovations when I can, and also strategize to only work part-time, because at the end of the day it is a "moralistic" form of wage slavery, and its only a part of my life purpose, not the whole of it. I will leave with one final thought food: What if a self-actualized society started to develop, where those traditional jobs still existed. Instead of wasting our time in school, 14 year-olds are taught how to fix cars, and work on computers or even power lines. By 16 they can make a full time salary and save money for their education, or for their lives. Also consider a society whose employers acknowledge the existence of a life purpose, and act as coaches for people and not tyrants. Coaches who inspire the individual to use their mundane job, like accounting, as a launch pad to develop the financial and mental discipline needed to pursue their true passion, music theory. Even crazier yet, picture a world where everyone has a vital skill set, like plumbing, and everyone helps out in providing for the stability of the infrastructure; But only Part-time, so that each and every person has the ability to take 5 month retreats to awaken, or can work on their business or passions 5 days out of the week. Imagine a world where people's thirst for knowledge and creativity was rewarded, not stifled, all while we take on the honorable responsibility of taking care of one another. Brings a tear to the eye, almost. But then again, there is a life purpose for that (much like the saying "there's an app for that").
  8. Just sharing an insight here. I realized recently that simply strategizing to “free up your time” is not enough to help you stay on purpose in life. I have often thought things like “if only I wasnt working so many hours a week, Id have the time and energy for Life Purpose work”; or “If I was single again, Id have so much time for inner work and music”. The mistake is assuming that simply having free time will equate to me becoming a more authentic me. This is false, unless you have done the inner work to handle obstacles to being authentic, like social pressures or a demanding career; or taming your inner gremlin and stopping those negative thought loops. As it stands now, I have carved out two weeks of free time. What happened? It was unconsciously filled with bullshit and obligations right away, While also falling back into ALL OF MY bad habits (video games, mindless youtube, sleeping late and not exercising). I have always struggled with three things in life: Time Management, People Pleasing, and Focusing. If you relate, just know that those tendencies are not a result of being too busy or obligated in life. The core of your problem is an emotional one and a Values one. You could be a trust-fund baby and have financial security for life, and all the free time you want; it would not help you. In fact, you’d be SOL, missing out on character level ups by staying true in the face of pressures. Today I got back in touch with my vision grounded in my top values, and magic happened. I suddenly feel like I have so much more energy, and so many things to do. Here’s a secret: if you are on purpose in life, there will be feelings that say “there just isnt enough time in the day!” Thats actually good, since its what helps you jump out of bed the very next day. Life is short, afterall. notice: it is hardest to get out of bed when you are off purpose; then boredom takes over and you get stuck in those nasty dopamine loops of horseshit time-wasters. Sit still and do nothing, when all else fails; you’ll reset and do just fine. Let me know what your insights are for managing the giant puzzle on the way to daily flow states and personal freedom. I feel like Im getting closer, even despite working full time and being in a relationship.
  9. @Strangeloop right on! Yeah, coaching people is hard to do without some semblance of theoretical and practical study. Human beings are very complicated. But here are a few steps for you to consider: 1) keep trying 1/1 coaching, but READ Leo’s list of Coaching books on the book list. There are 5 or 6 there that are crucial reads. 2) google some “Life coaching programs“ and figure out your price range. iPEC has a great reputation and is what Leo went with, but it is pricey. Nothing wrong with a cheaper option, but check those reviews first so you dont waste your time. 3) treat your coaching practice as sincerely as a Doctor does. That means, get your priorities straight with each and every conversation. Are you sure coaching is for you? We often underestimate how hard it is to develop REAL listening skills. 4) get some coaching yourself. Hard to sell something you have never bought yourself, right? 5) great! After all that, consider your specialty. You could actually make your purpose about GROUP COACHING in the recording studio setting; or coach bands for a living. And interestinf possibility there for you, but you can take that and run with it Im sure! Best of luck my friend.
  10. @SirVladimir I find it ABSOLUTELY LUDICROUS that I “technically” am not allowed to enjoy your Beautiful Mystical writings while having a toke, because the large corporate hospital setting is steeped in stage Orange consciousness that values mandated drug testing (we are truly in the dark ages!). The thing is, many healthcare workers experiment as psychonauts. Its partially what makes us empathetic and higher consciousness creatures, and if there was integration between an agency and the understanding that we nurses are “grown ups“ and wont come to work tripping balls, then I think we would have a higher quality of care and Love in our work again. Instead you have some folks who feel burnt out, and those who treated nursing as a life purpose feeling more like a wage slave at the end of it. Being a strategic motherf***er, I plan to take a 3 month retreat/ sabbatical from nursing a year and a half from now in between jobs. I have the whole thing planned out, and will be focusing primarily on higher consciousness strategizing during this time as well. If I return to the profession, my savings being depleted, I will do so as an independent contractor or someone with financial independence, because I have a specialized skill set and can do that sort of thing. I am building a sound foundation to launch from first, and collecting survival insights as I go.
  11. Hello actualized boys and girls. I am currently working as a nurse in an emergency room, and I have experimented with consciousness in my practice, with some profound results. Insight one: Mindfulness can save lives. I started to feel burnt out with the influx of Covid cases lately, and found myself returning to default consciousness and habits. I mean drinking too much coffee, watching bad youtube videos way past my bedtime, and eating fast food on the drive home from work. The fast food craving happened after seeing a decapitation case; I must have internalized a little stress from that one. I know several nurses who went out drinking at 6am, but I settled for a quarter pounder. Anyways, all this is to say that one day I stopped, and made it my intention to stop listening to crappy youtube on the way into work, instead practicing mindfulness with silence on the drive. Then I continued down the list of my default habits, until I found myself being mindful during CPR for a full cardiac arrest. The crazy thing is, my mindfulness helped me to realize that the reason this person's heart was not pumping was due to the fact that they were so overweight in their upper body area, that their adipose tissue weighed down to compress their heart, creating a tamponade effect. That is to say, my awareness led me to stop doing compressions at the two minute mark, and sit the patient up in bed. The pulse came back. Awareness at its finest right there. Insight two: Meaningful Work is not necessarily your life purpose.(for you young and indecisive people, like me) More and more lately, I am seeing the need for balance in the lives of our healthcare workers, myself included. This year has really highlighted that need, and the fact that there is a war on consciousness waged by big corporations (Hospitals are corporations who benefit monetarily from your well-insured ass having a heart attack multiple times in a year). That said, I am not here making a political statement. I am outlining a fact of modern employment that needs to be contended with, and I wish to create a realistic expectation in those of you who are young and have not started working a real job yet. I see a trend on this website a lot, ever since Leo's wage slavery video. I believe it is best described as younger people who think they can make the problems of survival emotionally easy just by aligning their income with a "conscious career" like Life coaching, nomadic web-based work, or being a gamer on youtube, or starting a podcast with an associated Patreon account. I was in this boat a short while ago, and almost pursued IPEC's $9000 training to become a Life Coach while simultaneously dropping out of nursing school. I am glad I did not do that, looking back. That would have been a subtle way of me running from painful growth opportunities in front of me. I am not going to say that any of these career choices are bad. But if you read that and are saying "wow, he described my aspirations pretty well there," I implore you to go out there and get some real world experience, and grow some fangs and claws before you pursue enlightened and creative work full time. Even though my career of nursing is not the most conscious and perfectly authentic path to me, it has taught me a lot about survival, lessons I would not have gotten any other way than by working a 9-5 (in my case, 3 12hrs in a row). And I would add that I chose nursing very intentionally. It was the only form of vocational training within my price range that even mentioned Self-Actualization and Maslow's hierarchy in its course curriculum. I took that as a sign I was maximizing my skill points in a strategic direction, and let me say, it feels like it is finally paying off. I went through some really dark times to get here, practicing as a nurse, but man I have a vantage point to work from. I might very well start my educational Coaching business this summer, given the population's infection rate backs off and the Covid vaccine does not create Zombies. Insight Three: Expand, because its your only option. Let me make this clearer with an analogy: You can grow into a little potted houseplant, seated in a comfortable little planter that you are familiar with, in a nice sunny spot in the front room that only gets shady after 2pm. You will be a potted houseplant, until your owner forgets to water you a few days while on vacation. Or you can become a badass Venous Fly Trap in the Amazon Jungle. You can ditch the potted soil, and sink your roots into some savage land, and grow into something of a force of nature. You can even grow up above the tree tops as a Kapok tree, with authentic roots that run deep, and become a form of flora that has survived floods and erosion, and has housed other creatures like Bees and Jaguars. Apply that weirdness to your own pursuits. Basically, accept the pain that comes with the freedom to grow, and remember that the species of plant your grow into is up to you at a certain point, only once you become tough enough. I see far too many older nurses who are "burnt out", who have been spit at, sworn at, kicked and even shot at too many times to find the mindfulness in the work that they do. They have become ungrounded, and often pursue unconscious and familiar pleasures that constrict their awareness roots, just to justify their continued torture of employment. That, my friends, is what I am talking about. Externally you can have the prestige of working in the ER, but on the inside you are a comfortable houseplant that struggles with making decisions, and always has fear and doubt that water will not come the next day. And you cannot reach shamanic levels of consciousness as a house tulip. Better to become the big ass tree the shamans smoke from, and risk enduring a flood from time to time. I see plenty of nurses and physicians who are entrepreneurs outside of their careers, even amidst the pandemic. Some leave work to go to the library to do market research. Others hit the gym after a 12 hour shift. Others still have a gig coming up with their band in a recording studio. One nurse even works part time during the holidays in order to make little holiday coffee cups as a side biz. In conclusion Perhaps that was not quite what your mind thought of when you read "insights from the ER", but I think the topic of life purpose and what to study is on a lot of people's minds this time of year. I know it was for me when I took final exams. I have more interesting stories and insights that are a little more bloody and interesting if you care to hear them some time. But for now, this one is long enough. Take care, keep meditating, and remember, Mindfulness can save lives. Ps: Id love to know your opinion of balancing a "real job/career" with life purpose and authentic consciousness pursuits like psychedelics or transcendant meditation retreats. I realize we need nurses, plumbers, and even lawyers. But maybe it is up to us to work on ourselves to bring consciousness standards into these professions, rather than running away from these professions all together.
  12. Here I just want to thank Leo for posting a video a while back called "awareness alone is curative" NOTE: Before you skip, observe your resistance to reading all this text. Practice observation here. My lack of decisiveness is my core issue. Through simple awareness, with a dash of self-love and compassion, I have had these insights: 1. my lack of decisiveness = lack of time spent observing the truth. 2. Awareness can cure procrastination and suffering for good, here's how: realize that the duality between "what you'd rather be doing right now" and what you "have to do to survive/ pay the bills/ pass the test/ get fit" is nonexistent. There is no difference between suffering and discipline, and the freedom of relaxation and fun. In fact, I have used awareness to build a "positive feedback loop" relating to anything requiring discipline, such that i have been way more consistent and actually EXCITED to work! The harder I work now, the bigger my excitement becomes for the things my discipline will afford me on my off time. Just apply awareness to solve your suffering, again, with a dash of self-love and understanding. Note: this "excitement" to work does take a few cranks to get going. For example, school work usually requires that i am sitting quietly for at least five minutes becoming present. Its kinda like warming up and stretching your awareness muscle before a workout... Be sure to do positive self talk and love for added benefit. Dont knock this hippy dippy bullshit until you try it for yourself... "I am a hard worker, Look at my discipline right now, When i am done with studying i will feel great and a lot smarter!" just as an examplar. 3. There are some parts of myself which i can trust, and other parts of myself that i cannot trust. The difference is asking the question: "who would be ok just sitting and observing this right now?" ... whoever squirms or tries to distract you is the traitor. example: I needed to read for school. Parts of me resisted and said "lets do some dishes, or even laundry..." While the part of myself that I trust was OK with simple sitting and observing myself reading for school... observing the boredom and passage of time until i got interested in my work again... 4. You have creative responsibility in relationship to your habits and mental hygiene. I mean, that you literally create your own positive/negative feedback loops, so do this mindfully. For example, take the time out of your day to mindfully create a positive logical system surrounding getting gas for your car. Think it through: instead of taking the gas pump for granted and grinding your teeth at the gas prices, observe just how cool it is that you are putting a combustible fluid into an elaborate system of bio-mimicry, metabolizing this fuel for the sole purpose to automatize and optimize your travel towards YOUR GOALS and LIFE...you can literally think of filling your gas tank like an act of freedom and an ability, rather than a hassle. 5. sit and wait, and it will come... I promise you, that feeling you had when you were little and could play all day in the summer time. that memory you have of family holidays playing monopoly, or that feeling you had when you first played Skyrim or some other cool game, or that feeling of touching your first football or playing your first guitar. It all comes back to you, in your gut, balls/ovaries and bones. I promise, with enough patience, observation, and self-love not judgement, you will allow the deepest most passionate recesses of your past selves to have the courage to step forward and infect your current circumstance. I just found myself making jokes with a cashier the other day out of no where, and when i observed this for what it was, i discovered it was a previous self having the courage to step forward and be fully present in the moment, rather than my normal status of self-absorbed planning and worrying about work or school. And finally, 6. Courage is a muscle which is hypertrophied through continue self-exposure to work and suffering. I know, its not what i wanted to hear either. consider it like a workout the next time you just sit and observe your own emotions, the next time to resist an addiction through observation and love, the next time you listen and observe to your loved one without trying to manipulate them to your needs. Remember, positive feedback loops are your responsibility to build, so take full responsibility for the training required to stomach this work: take the time to practice observation and build courage. You feel that "gravel" like feeling in your gut at the thought of this work? Observe it. Feeling resistance to reading a long paragraph? observe it. Anything at all, just observe it. Observation is marching up the sled hill. Once you put that work in, you can enjoy the ride down
  13. You can fall flat on your face trying to be a "yes man", "jack of all trades", or an "overnight Arnold Schwarzenegger". Here are words to live by: Perhaps consider your current mentors; are you employing a healthy comparison (inspiration) with these overachievers, or are you trying to snap your fingers and achieve their success by compelling yourself to take on "productive chaos." Really, how many successful projects do you need? (hint: just one).
  14. This week: Simplify elegantly Get back in touch with my value of boredom. (boredom leads to my best work). Make 30 minutes for a boredom session. This will be like starter fluid for the carburetor to my creation engine. Do it Badly I will shadow during a neurosurgery this week. Hoping to ask the right questions to learn something. First time for everything. Shed some light on it; its medicinal Let's take some stock of myself. I will fight for my life this week, combating what people think of me. People change, and so can I. I cannot let my fear destroy me. Will I let myself be mindlessly painted into a safe cushy job, throwing away my potential, and leave this life with a wimper? No. I will go out at 109 with a BANG. I want to give myself security in my creative capabilities and insight. I want to be able to count on myself to live a dream life. I'll bet that making time to be bored with put me in touch with the thing I've been sick without for a while now. I believe my fuel is unrestricted creation. Living life in sand box mode is the life I aspire to. Will I create something this week?
  15. I love music that makes me feel my heartbeat. I love making music with my friends; a good jam out is the shit. I am in love music>> I love writing a story. I love picking the details that interest me, and using language to illuminate them. I am in love with writing>> I love art. I love how life feels when we create things and we mean it. I am in love with art. Welcome to my journal. I will spread some positive energy here, as well as insights I glean from time to time via living my core tenants: Simplify elegantly Do it Badly Shed some light on it; its medicinal. We need art. We need self awareness. We need balance in life. If you're reading this, join me for some healthy entertainment. SPEAK FROM THE GUT.