Crane Bahnsteik

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  1. @Vision It boils down to practice really. Become in contact with the feelings of the body, the heaviness of the physical sensation that comes with the emotion, the visceral feeling of resistance and contraction of the muscles, and then play with it. Its like the difference of having your dog barking against your will or inviting the dog to bark see, the last one doesn't bother you so much because you are hearing the bark on your own volition.
  2. His articulation comes from the way his brain is wired in the sense that he gets an immense emotional payoff by being overly intricate in his speech. It's an art and a form of personal expression analogous Bach's compositions, which are extremely complex and intricate. His father taught him to read very early on and he became very proficient at it, probably because it was a way to get approval from his father. Also as far as i can see he has great working memory, memory in general, and a great ability to interconnect concepts.
  3. @Vision Yes precisely. Subconsciously you are afraid of letting go and being dominated by the emotion which is normal, letting go of an emotion is a pandoras box to the ego since the ego does not know whats going to happen to its identity and it also means its eventual demise. In a way, the you that feels regret will die so it takes a lot of courage. This feeling of courage is sometimes crucial in the process of letting go, if you let go from a place of courage it becomes much easier. Dificulty can arise from the fact of you trying to release an emotion when your "state" is low, like for example, trying to release fear from a place of fear, it just forms a feedback loop from which is dificult to escape, try to get to more powerful emotions like courage and acceptance and release from there, its like jumping from an airplane, you feel the surge of courage and jump. You can try and make the emotion bigger and see if it helps, feel the emotion, isolate the visceral sensation and increase it as much as you can. The sedona method technique by Lester Levenson which inspired the letting go method by David Hawkins is also helpful, especially the 1992 course on youtube, the new ones are not so good. The 90's Office Visit Series by David Hawkins is also great, you can get it for free on audible by using their trials.
  4. @Javfly33 Fear is too broad of a term and a consequence of language. What you feel in fact is a bundle of emotions. Imagine this: You dress as best you can, fix your haircut, and put on a nice cologne, it does not matter what your conscious mind thinks, you are doing this to get something from women and to manipulate them in some kind of way, now because of that there will be unsconscious guilt, now with the guilt comes the subconscious fear that the women will discover you are trying to get something from them and manipulating them, now with the fear and the guilt comes the shame of it all and you just want to hide, and with the shame comes the anger that women are judging you when you are only trying to do something about your life, and so on. This is where the "abundance mindset" theory comes in, if you are abundant you are not trying to get something/manipulate and therefore avoid the whole cascade of emotions, this is also why being in a good mood is the whole game, if you are already complete and in a good mood you avoid the first emotion and therefore the whole cascade. There are several ways to go about this, what i did was to simply dont give a fuck, i would talk to girls the way i talked to a friend, even sometimes being boring as fuck i just didnt care, didnt even dress properly or fix my hair, i then noticed my results were way better this way lol, this is only a temporary fix but can teach you a lot, in the end its all about being fully fulfilled with or without.
  5. Suffering. Eventually the suffering becomes so immeasurable that you rather face the fear and die than not face it at all and keep suffering.
  6. @eTorro Dealing with escorts is way different than dealing with normal women, escorts will pretend they love you, chase you, and approve of you no matter what you do. This happens of course because its their job, this doesnt help you in learning how to deal with women, its like having a girlfriend, you can have a girlfriend for years and still never learn how to deal with women or how to be social. Even sexually it is kinda awkward and does not translate directly into "real world experience". The day after you have an escort you will probably be back to square one mentally so to speak, so as a standalone tool it is not very effective, you can try using escorts as a momentum builder, like lets say, have an escort in the morning and do normal approaches/dates later in the day now that you are "socially warmed up", but even this is kind of messy and requires large amounts of money, because unless you are doing an insane amount of spiritual work you will need dozens or even hundreds of encounters to learn social and sexual skills. You might as well spend that money on couching and workshops I would say.
  7. Transurfing Steps I-V by Vadim Zeland.
  8. @Vision Yes family plays a big role, as well as genetics, friends, and so on, you were programmed to feel that way in that context. The situation itself is of little importance, what matters is the program running in your mind making you feel that way when certain variables align. Attachment to parents is one of the most difficult things to release because of the god image we attribute to them, we put our parents in a pedestal and live subconsciously by their notions and opinions of reality, this is obviously part genetic programming telling us to learn from them because they survived long enough to reproduce, and social programming because we have to fit in our family to survive, depending on how your brain works you can either live by their rules or do the opposite. What we fail to realise then is that our parents are just two people who had sex, no more than that, parents are of no more value than a random person in a street, this does not mean that you have to treat them like some random people, this just means that they know no better than you when it comes to living your life. The effectiveness of letting go or acceptance increases as you increase the resolution of that which you are releasing, the more specific you are the better. If you try to let go of money for instance you get stuck, money is not the problem, money is neutral, the problem are the emotions behind it, see, the ego is like a wall, if you want to tear the wall down you dont start by removing the top blocks, you remove the bottom ones and the wall will crumble, the same with the ego, you have to identify what happened in your life that made you feel that way. Now, beacause memories can be clouded by emotional content, the best way in my opinion to reach them is to experience the emotions out, dont resist the resistance, dont resist the feelings as bad as they seem to be, let go of wanting to let go, the more you want the feeling to leave the more it will stay, stay with the emotions, even if you have to sit in a room alone with no eletronics, just let them take over you, as you experience the emotions the memories will arise and it will become obvious why you feel a certain way, be it by social or genetic programing (Like inheriting an overactive amygdala for instance), and its there when you can release the bottom blocks of the wall and make it crumble.
  9. Maybe its not about the money. You failed and experienced a loss, failure is part of life and loss is guaranteed, we will eventually lose everything, even our lives, so grief over loss is something that has to be trancended. Accept that you are not perfect and that you are subject to error. Accept that life is the experience of change and in a world where everything changes loss is a given, also, look at your past and all the times you didnt deal with loss properly, surrender those losses as well.
  10. Well, I dont deal with emotions by sharing or expressing them anymore, I deal with them at the fundamental level by understanding what they are and why they are present. But first we have to the define emotions and the purpose of expressing and sharing them. I am defining emotions by anger, pride, fear, shame, desire, and all those survival based instincts, i also dont define Love as an emotion because it is a way of being "in" the World and the substract of reality itself. The purpose lets say is to reach emotional maturity. What is an emotion to begin with? Its an experience derived from an error in judgement and a resistance to the physical feeling itself. Why is talking about feelings with other people considered good? What is the purpose of expressing or sharing emotions? To make them go away? To be approved? To be Loved? This is actually the immature way of doing it. Although sharing and expression can be useful at times, they will never solve the underlying lack in consciousness/imaturity, they are only useful if you want to live your life emotionally, all emotions are based on illusions, there is no end to sharing or expressing emotions, on the short term you may feel better because by sharing the feeling, you go into yourself and face/explore part of the emotion, releasing a little bit of resistance to it, but the notion of having to have another person present to do it it's not optimal, pratical, or even considerate towards the other person since we are throwing our emotional garbage at them, this is why so many unhealthy relationships exist, there is the one who likes to throw his/her emotional garbage because he/her cant deal with it, and then there is the other person who feeds of that energy which increases his/her sense of superiority and pride. I actually used to share a lot and express a lot of emotion, i was a musician and expressed my feelings on my instrument hours a day for years, at the end of the day i would feel good, but the next day i would still wake up and feel like shit, needing the expression/sharing to feel good again. So now i just sit with the emotions and feel them without resistance as best as possible, accepting them like i accept my arms and legs, if i need to solve something in the world i do it through logic and wisdom as best as i can instead of lashing out or pushing emotions into another person. If let's say in a relationship i find that my girlfriend is flirting with other men, even though the emotions of anger, pride, jeleously are present, i dont act from them, i accept them as a construct of a body that wants to survive and is creating such feelings in a phisiological manner (Cold hands, high blood pressure, knot in the stomach...), i then act from self love and respect and deal with it logically, i don't need emotions to solve stuff, acting from emotions actually make things way more difficult, i'll just say "Its fine if you want to flirt with other men, but you'll have to find another bf." for example, without any neediness attached. We actually live in an overemotionalyzed society that keeps us trapped in said emotions and makes us believe we need them to live, emotions even move the economy itself (Clickbait, News, Politics ...) Its good to be aware of emotions but they are the tip of the iceberg as far as human life is concerned.
  11. You can try masturbation without touching the head of the penis, and instead of focusing on mental imagery focus on the feeling of love itself.
  12. Well, i would go into the feelings of those rejections and experience them out, this way eventually the emotional content of those memories dissipate, the trick is to not get caught in the emotion. Lets say you are feeling shame and guilt about a rejection, let yourself be dominated by the shame and guilt until it doesnt bother you as much, cry if you feel to, if you feel you are not making progress, become angry at the shame and guilt that set you up, not at externals, this will give you more energy to deal with the issue. Then i would isolate the feeling of rejection, that visceral sensation, and love it, just love the feeling of rejection and being rejected the best you can, until you can laugh at it, rejection is just an expression of reality, why not to accept it? The problem of rejection is not the rejection itself but the resistance to it, if you love rejection no woman will have power over you and consequently you will become naturally more attractive (Not that it matters anymore in this state.). Besides, rejection just means incompatibility. Another thing is to be honest and yourself in every situation to the best of your ability, be vulnerable to the fact that people may not like you and be yourself anyway, this is hard but one of the fastest ways to let go of wanting other's approval. The problem with spiritual work is that sometimes we become overly judging on our actions (am i being correct? is this what i should do? is this aligned with what i watched on youtube?) this creates an extra layer of resistance and mental processing that doesnt help at all, just give yourself the luxury of being yourself, consciously, while having of course, a normal social etiquette in mind, and learn from your mistakes.
  13. Trying to solve desire with desire is not the best way to go around it. Being sexual desire just a feeling in the body telling the body to reproduce, it is crazy how much we give it importance and sometimes even make it a case of life and death. The worst part of it is that we imbue desire with other characteristics, like spiritual characteristics (Wanting to dissolve in another's beingness), characteristics of love (I really love this person), or even self-worth (I can only accept myself after this person accepts me, otherwise i have no value) we put all in an imaginary box and call it "love" or "attraction" which could not be further from the truth. The moment you get that 10/10 girl to be crazy for you, you realize how mundane it is and that in fact all you felt up until that point was an illusion, too bad we forget this and start chasing the next 10/10, this happens with everything that we desire. If you are trapped into desire and cant get out just get angry at your desire, desire is the problem, not the dating market. Avoid dairy at all costs, that thing makes some people horny as fuck. When you are masturbating or having sex really become aware and conscious of what is happening, what you are doing, and all the sensations of the body. You always have value and you can always accept yourself. Be conscious of the fact that a random girl contributing to your sense of self worth is completely an arbitrary positionality, what a person thinks of you is pretty much dependent on their genetics, upbringing, personality, social context... all random variables that dont represent the value you have as a person. Imagine what you consider a 10/10 girl being crazy for you just because you have a tattoo of a turtle on your forearm because she has a fetish for it, does that increase your value? No, it makes no sense, its the same will all other characteristics like height and so forth, they are all arbitrary.
  14. A problem can not be solved at the level at which it was created, this is like a fly bouncing against the window when in fact the window is open. What are nice guys? 99% of nice guys are nice because they want something and are being manipulative to get it, so its a conditionality, they are only nice if they get what they want, since this is highly manipulative the other person will subconsciously pick on it and start resisting/avoiding or even treat the manipulative person in a harshly manner. Also, by being nice to "get" you are coming from a duality perspective, the perspective in which there is something to be gotten, this is never the case and only induces more resistance in the other person. On the other hand, being a dick triggers the innate ego response of seeking approval, thats why many people chase assholes, its an approval issue derived from lack of self esteem and self love. All these problems arise due to the innate sense of separation that accompanies experience, people feel good in relationships because a part of the sense of separation dissolves and the state of peace where nothing has to be done starts to prevail. Since we cannot control other people and trying to do so only results in more resistance, changing our behavior to get results (being less nice, being more aggressive, being rude, being sexual) will either fail or put you in relationships with like minded manipulative people. So, the solution to the problem is letting go of trying to control others and letting go of getting their approval, since anyway, all these are "internal" perspectives and do not exist in the "real world", there is no one approving of you out there, there is only a feeling inside which you unconsciously are creating, by realizing this then you realize all subjective reality is self created and separation is merely an illusion necessary to create emotions. In this state you attract people that actually like you for what you are and with whom you have the innate sense of freedom derived from the non manipulative state you are now in. In this state the people who don't like you or even treat you like shit just don't matter anymore, its their problem and only reflects their lack of self love.
  15. Speaking solely on the covid vaccine issue, the more the government pushes the vaccination the more people will push back, it is normal human behavior, that's why the best form of control is the one you are don't even aware of. About the people who don't want to take the vaccine, well, there are various types, some have good points while others don't, fundamentally nobody knows anything, it's an experimental vaccine and just because you feel tired for 2 days and then feel fine it doesn't mean you won't have any problems years from now (you can check side effects on openvaers), some diseases take years to develop symptoms, adding to this the censorship that is going on where even the Mrna vaccine inventor got censored on youtube and no one is talking about prescribing ivermectin only generates more disbelief, you even have organizations like OSHA stating that they will not enforce 29 CFR 1904’s recording requirements to require any employers to record worker side effects from COVID-19 vaccination. This will result on a segmented society where you will be able to clearly distinguish who's vaccinated and who isn't, and shame/discriminate who isn't until they are vaccinated, which is another form of control and a decentralized one. Want everyone to take the vaccine? Stop pushing and put a price on it, people love paying for stuff.