Joel3102

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Posts posted by Joel3102


  1. Out of the blue I've had really bad insomnia the last few days. Like 3 hours of sleep a night, and it's starting to freak me out because I don't cope well with no sleep. Feel like a zombie, can't focus or do anything, yet I don't really feel tired as much as wired out. 

    Trying to work out what could be causing this, nothing in my life has really changed, I'm not stressed or anything. My only current theory is that I've been going heavy with Leo's concentration technique recently, and made some pretty gains in my awareness. Could this be a side effect of my mind rewriting itself?

    If anyone has any insomnia tips would be much appreciated.


  2. I feel you can have an "ego" that you still operate through. But an enlightened person person directly recognised that ego is not what they are existentiallly. I'm not sure though, I feel an enlightened individual may live in constant non duality whilst their body-mind retains some elements of ego. Happy to be corrected by any fully enlightened people here.


  3. My whole life I have pondered existential questions a crazy amount, and I'm pretty excited after learning about enlightenment that these questions CAN be answered, albeit not at the logical level. One thing that's playing on my mind all the time is can you genuinely have an insight into what another human/mind/organism actually is. I've experienced the absolute pure consciousness that I am, but I've been having trouble how this fits into billions of minds. Is it actually possible to have an enlightenment of what 'another' is? 

    Another thing: Anybody experience ego death in the middle of the night? Sometimes, especially if I have been making breakthroughs in my meditation, I have been waking up in the middle of the night and a full on ego death state. I have no identity, and I completely exit the 'context' of conventional life to the point where it frightens the shit out of me. The notion that I was born into a world, and have an actual life becomes preposterous...I dunno must be something to do with transitioning from the dream state or deep sleep.  Anyone else experience such mind-fuckery during mid night waking?


  4. Check out Leo's videos on how to stop backsliding and how to be patient. Have you got a journalling habit? I journal every morning and night to keep track of my goals and habits and I write it down if I notice myself getting a bit complacent with a particular area. Just a way to help you be more conscious of the direction you're heading in. 


  5. This recent talk on the blog and forum has led me to realise my meditation has been too mechanical and not done consciously enough for serious results. I was thinking of doing a daily rating system where I assess the quality of my meditation to keep track and look for any trends as well.

    Here are the criteria for good meditationI am thinking of, any others I should add?

    -alternates/wakefulness 

    -focus

    -monkey mind (lack thereof)

    -bodily calmness 


  6. Similar experience here myself. I considered myself someone who "had DPD" after doing weed and LSD, which both completely fucked my model of reality forever. I realise now the suffering that it caused was that I clung and wanted back to my old conventional, materialist paradigm of reality. I would always be worrying if life is a dream or not. Ironically what's helped me more than anything is getting into spirituality and non duality via Actualized and learning that hey, yeah life is a dream and reality is not physical but....it's actually a beautiful thing. Now that I don't cling to my old paradigm "DP" never even crosses my mind. I'm planning on returning to psychedelics soon, mushrooms first at a low dose, as I think I will be more mature about it this time from my conceptual understanding and meditation.

    My advice would be don't identity with DP and stay away from those DP forums as they are cancer....


  7. I used to be a social media addict. What I did was wrote a complex password down somewhere that I couldn't remember, and only login when I had to check up on the basics. So I've gone from someone who looked at Facebook 4 hours a day to less than 5 minutes. Sooo much better, more time to do more productive things. I also used this chrome add on which auto unfollows every person and unlikes every page, so you don't get sucked into the click-bait, shallow like-whory shit on the news feed.

    I think this approach is good because you still keep those few benefits of having a Facebook account, if it's the most convenient way of contacting someone, going to events, or being part of groups. But you eliminate its harmful aspects.