TeamBills

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About TeamBills

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  1. @Frode I've been thinking about studying what makes good writing. Do you have any other book suggestions on this topic?
  2. @phoenix666 I enjoyed your mini report too. Thanks for the comment. "I actually do miss something. I miss simply being. I could do this forever. I could stay here forever. I wouldn't miss anything at all, not my family, not my friends, not my books, not the internet.. just being" I kind of felt the same way as this at times, it was really enjoyable.
  3. I ended up doing the retreat right after I posted this thread, but I never updated you guys how it went, so I'm doing that now. First off, @Leo Gura was right with " Do it indoors. You can do a few sits per day outside to break things up." I tried to do it solely outside but what I noticed is that when you do it solely outside your mind gets so focused on how cold you are that that is what it mostly thinks about which is a distraction from what you are trying to do. What shocked me about my retreat is that I had zero craving for stimulation. This shocked me. Not once was I restless. I did think about wanting stimulation of some kind a few times, but right after I thought that thought I realized that sitting here meditating was more enjoyable than any type of stimulation that I was thinking about (I wouldn't call that a craving for stimulation.) What I learned on my retreat is that meditation really is more enjoyable then video games, computer, tv etc. It's this weird feeling/realization that is hard to describe unless you feel it for yourself. I remember watching one of Leo's videos where he said that meditation was more fun then activities like video games, computer etc but I was skeptical. Not anymore. I could totally see how someone could see that. Again, it is a hard thing to explain unless you feel it for yourself.
  4. What Actualized.org Video Has Helped You The Most? For me it is this one: I have come back to this video many times in my life. Even though I have notes on the video I still like to listen to it somewhat frequently. Very good video if you want more joy in your life, and you find life to be a chore. My notes on the video: * Interest in the world as it is, and not the way you need it to be. *A struggle in the individual in what he is and what he believes he should be. * A refusal to accept what is happening in the present. A neurotic is someone who obsessively demands that life be other than what it is. Fundamentally it is a denial or reality. * A neurotic is very often lost in "monkey mind" arguing in his own mind with what is, and how things ought to be other than what they are.
  5. Funny you responded to this topic recently, because I just looked at it again. I found 2 pc programs for Audible and they are both horrible. I am using the Audible Android app. It allows me to do the bookmarks that Leo was talking about. I have had no problems with it so far.
  6. @Joseph Maynor I've watched both multiple times before today, and yes I agree they are similar, but I also see differences. For example, (from what I remember) 100% responsibility doesn't focus as much on "the self."
  7. Thank you, that made sense to me.
  8. Enl@Gopackgo Enlightment is what non duality is? I have been searching the forum for non duality posts and to me it all sounded like a different language. I was under the assumption that it was something separate from enlightment. I also went through Leo's videos and couldn't find any of them with the word "non duality" in the title, which made me confused because I remembered him talking about it on his videos before, but I couldn't remember which ones.
  9. What service did you use to create the actualized.org forum? A site I'm on was looking to use a different service for their forum, and this is probably the best forum I have seen.
  10. I don't see guide #2 on this topic. Are you talking about the link in your signature?
  11. I hope I don't jinx it for myself, but I think this video is awesome. I wouldn't say it has helped with my personal development (unless I'm not noticing it) and it doesn't make me a genius like the title says, but this video works great at calming me down. I have tried other binaural beats on YouTube and they didn't do much for me. Nothing has compared to this video for me. I can't imagine that there is a better binaural beat video for helping someone relax.
  12. If anyone tried to help, thank you. When I posted this topic I thought I was ok with hearing what you guys had to say, but after a few days I realized I'm too scared to read what you guys think, especially the enlightened people who replied. I haven't read any of the posts on this topic, I scrolled to the bottom and enlarged the screen resolution so I couldn't read the replies. Sorry to have wasted the time if anyone was trying to help. I feel really bad about it. I will respond and read the replies later, but I'm not ready yet. I'll @ you guys so you know when I reply.
  13. I have noticed over the last few years since specific things have come up in my life that my body is completely tense, unable to relax. It is like my body is caving in if that makes any sense. I can't change it with meditation or really any techniques. The funny thing is this doesn't change at all when I run, even the times I run and I feel like I am going to pass out but I keep going to reach my predetermined distance. It is pretty crazy, So I do think this is something to look into if anyone here is noticing it. I mean it doesn't really bother me or anything but maybe it bothers other people here.
  14. I've watched these videos multiple times. The enlightment ones I watched about a year ago, forgot about it, and have now come back to. Spiritual Enlightment 1-3 What To Next After Learning About Enlightment Enlightment FAQ 1-2 Benefits of Enlghtment Advanced Tips For Self-Inquiery Does Free Will Exist What To Do Next After Learning About Enlightment How To Become Enlightened (half of it) Understading Awareness Ultimate Model of Human Knowledge How You Lie Radial Openmindness I wanted to think about this a little bit before posting on here so I could get my thoughts straight about it. Hasn't worked. So the whole thing about no free will has been scaring the crap out of me. A major, major problem for me and a 24/7 obsessive thought too is about me not being able to be an adult, not being responsible enough, not being able to hold onto a job, not being able to grow up, getting caught up in addictions which derail my life because of my lack of self discipline, and not being able to fit into society. If what Leo says is true then I have absolutely no control on whether that happens or not. I've watched the videos I listed but I am still partly confused. So someone who has reached enlightment could be homeless their whole life or have some type of addiction that derails their entire life but with reaching enlightment they realize it isn't in their control so they are ok and at peace with it and are still way happier and more relaxed then someone who has the opposite life style but who also isn't enlightened? 1. The answer of "well just get some self discipline and you don't have to worry" isn't going to really address the issue here in my opinion. It is a very, very complicated situation. I'll leave it at that. 2. If you have reached enlightment could you add that in your post? Maybe you have a different view point then people who isn't enlightened. Thanks
  15. Good stuff here thanks for the post. Never thought about a good immune support supplement. There were 2 times I could of done it during the Summer but I procrastinated/chickened out and never did it. If I don't do the retreat now then I will have to wait until at least April, probably June. A huge and scary situation is coming up in my life in June that I am terrified about so I want to do it while there still is a bit of time left before June. Also, in New York it isn't comfortable to go outside until early to late April. That is my personal taste, anything below 65-62 I feel uncomfortable. Obviously it isn't as bad as winter, but it still isn't comfortable for me. So yeah there really isn't a way around it. This really isn't on topic but there are so many people that live in New York that constantly complain about how cold and bad the weather is especially when the snow is bad yet they choose to live in New York. I don't understand it. Most of the time their excuses could totally be worked around if they put in the work. It isn't a good time for me right now in my life to be moving somewhere warmer but I definitely will eventually. "I guess my advice would be to try to use it to your advantage and be very mindful of/observe your aversion towards any physical discomfort." I really like that. Some negative things can be taken as a positive. Don't really have a choice with my current situation and what is going to be happening in the summer. @Nahm Interesting suggestion. You guys keep coming up with stuff I never would of thought of. Sure the truth can be found in the cold. Why not? Plenty of successful yogis, munks, etc have had breakthroughs or "the truth" as this forum likes to say in the cold. I've tried a million different things and gotten minimal results so why not try something a little more radical that has helped a lot of people.