Riccurdo

So for you having this polarity was a good thing in the end? Are you single now?

Thank you for your thoughtful reply! Yes most of things you mentioned I can check mark. I've been in a spiritual path for a while so this thing that happened is one obstacle after another like me using psychedelics. In a mental level were are not aligned fully because she just doesn't understand reality like I do. I still love her but ehh it is tough atm... She never hated. Just confused. But this thing what happened might add some hatred towards it.

So, I've been with my girl for 2 years and I have grown spiritualy a lot. She is not spiritual person. Scientific minded doing her PhD. Lately there has been a lot of backlash from our differences. It kinda started from me meeting this girl in a meditation retreat in last Sep. I don't really have spiritual friends so I thought she could be my first. Long story short, we texted a lot and I gave her a lot of space to be herself (I noticed she was really fragile for not showing her authenticity). I felt in my heart that was the right thing to do. What happened was that she got a crush on me and was sending me half naked pics and such. I told my girlfriend of the whole situation and she couldn't understand why I would do this. We had talks after this and I noticed how it's really important to me to give space to people and help them to be more authentic. I feel a lot of suffering in the world in that regard. Of course, she doesn't understand this spiritual level and was only thinking that I was naive and stupid. She said to me that why don't you prioritize me over her. The thing is that I'm getting more spiritual and having this egoic side picking is less and less relevant. I listened to my gf and quit talking to the girl. I'm not perfect either and I feel like I learned that even if you want to help somebody to be themselves there has to be boundaries. After this incident, I have tried to explain how I see the world from relative and absolute truth. She doesn't understand and thinks the absolute is some kind of sandbox gta where people just murder others for no reason. She wants her to be the most important thing in my life, but I feel like spirituality (truth) is actually mine. Even though she tries to be openminded person, she mostly sees things from her eyes. Lately I feel like living alone, so I can get this spiritual freedom that my soul wants but it is also scary because I know how I can make my girl suffer. I still love her but I don't know if it will be fading away. Maybe I mostly love her so she won't feel bad. TLDR: My girlfriend doesn't understand spirituality like me and it causes a lot of friction. I feel like my heart wants to explore the reality and she is slowing it down.

Yeah I have been promiscuous too and have some experience with STDs but I have done some pretty dumb things. I think if you use protection always and be picky which girls to pick, you are good to go.

I was resonating with your story a lot. I'm having the same problems right now in my life and I find that I need to practice self-love more. Maybe you are right with the last paragraph.

Thank you for all the answers! You guys are awesome!

Hello everyone! This is my first post on this forum and I'm quite excited! Last weekend, I had a LSD trip and after it I started to question the whole spiritual work. If the key in life is to awaken and keep awakening even more, what is the point in the end, if reality keeps unfolding and closing in a loop infinitely? Don't get me wrong. I value spiritual work and it makes being here more enjoyable, but is this enlightment work, getting to the highest consciousness and maybe this sort of grind to self-actualize, meaningless in the end, if we just melt back to the universe and become another being later? Then all of this work should be done again? In a way, I can find grinding spiritual work as an ego trip, if not being aware of it. But as long it is enjoyable, why not just do something, that makes you happy? I know this can be just a phase of my ego dying and later on I get things better but I would like to hear what others have to say about this, who maybe know more than me on this forum.

Any updates? Just purchased the course :((