Philipp

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Posts posted by Philipp

  1. Posted

    I am sorry this text is long and repeating itself. I just had to stream out my thoughts as they came in order to express myself genuinly. I dont have the strength or clarity to organize my thoughts better.

    Also I posted this in under consciousness because a lot of anxieties, thoughts, strategies to get better came from spiritualty. ||


    I cant anymore. I feel so empty. I feel just sadness. I have no energy. I cant sleep. I did not sleep for a month (0 hours.) I don't understand what is happening. I just feel no love anymore. No desires. I don't want to cause pain to my family and friends, but I am just completly empty. I feel no desire. No real long lasting desire. Is it about loving myself? What should I love about myself? My personality? My achievements? My Body? My thoughts? I am not sure I hate anything about me. 

    I just have no desires and energy. I have been trying to escape my mind with spirituality. I have been trying to let go of my mind. I meditated for hours. Some spiritual shools teach that desires are bad. And some cravings probably are bad for your wellbeing (like sugar). I just want to feel relaxed. I just want to feel relaxed. And to have some strength. Some vitality. 

    If I find something I want to do. It feels empty. I just want to love something. I cant really identify with my mind. But I am far from letting go too. I just feel confused, what to do. 

    Are desires important? Happiness seems to lie beyond desires, yet I have no energy to live. I need some desires. How do people live in caves? I feel drawn to that, but it seems like a trap. I dont have the energy and strength to be so stoic. 

    I just cant anymore. I need to get better. I need to sleep. I need to find some desire. Am I holding onto my ego? Am I desperatly trying to identify with my desires? I don't know why I care so much. 

    Where do I find some strength? Some purpose. For all I know a purpose is as meaningless as a desire. Yet it feels like I need one to survive. How could I live without purpose? What if I was alone on a planet? No humanity. Would there still be a purpose to be found? 

    What does it mean to love myself. This phrase has been used a lot. What should I love? Or is it more about following my desires? Allowing myself to have desires? Love seems to be used as acceptance. Accepting myself. Accepting my "false self". Accepting my ego? Accepting my desires? 
    Or is there no such thing as "loving yourself". Is there just love. Accepting experience. Accepting Emotions. 
    I just want some vitality and some desire. Some pleasant experience. Something that helps me forget the sadness. Something that helps me to relax. 
    I want to survive. 1 month without sleep. Medication has worked once but I dont want to used as it seems to prevent real healing. But i feel so weak, that I might just die, not even suicide. Just death by weakness.
    I would love some guidance. Is transcending the ego a trap/misunderstood? I often seem to want to escape myself. Yet desires seem so linked with an identification with the ego. Is it okay to feel identified as the ego? Is meditation too much at the moment? What does it mean to love yourself? Should I pursue my desires? 

    Some stress seems to come from the fact that I don't feel like myself. No truly knowing what I am. Yet I have not slept for 1 month and I just want to find some strength. Should I ignore such feelings? 

    How can I sleep? I feel anxious, sad and without purpose (and of course compeltly exhausted). My sadness seems broad. My fear more specific about not surviving, not finding happyness/ not finding peace.  

    I feel irritated by living with my parents. Yet I have forced myself to accept it. Acceptance is king. But I cant. I am not in able to accept all just like that. My mind is too weak. I have grief and anxiety going rampant. Was this some spiritual bullshit. Trying to convince myself that my circumstances don't matter? That I can love everything. That I can apreciate everything. 

    I had no mystical experiences. I don't know what god is. I am just a 27 yo male, very depressed, unable to sleep/relax/ let go. Does anyone think they can help me?

  3. Posted · Edited by Philipp

    A question to all, which is not about moralizing or taking sides, just about predicting. 

    What do you think will be the future of the Palestine/Israel conflict?

    1)    Israel control over entirety of Palestine and most Palestinians end up leaving to other countries. 

    2)    Israel control over entirety of Palestine, and Palestinians stop resisting and continue to live there under very poor conditions.

    3)    Israel control over entirety of Palestine, and Palestinians stop resisting and continue to live there under good conditions

    4)    Israel control over entirety of Palestine, but Palestinians keep violantly resisting and war continues for the next 20+ years.

    5)    2 autonomous, independant, peacefull states.

    6)    2 autonomous, peacefull states, but Palestine is not allowed to have a military. 

    7)    2 autonomous, independant, peacefull states, but with completly different borders.

    8)    unification of Israel and Palestine, under a secular constitution.

    9)    Israel anexation of Palestine, but Palestinians gain full citizenship. 

    10)  Israel anexation of Palestine, and most Palestinians are forced to leave. 

    11)   Israel dissolution and Israelis gain full citizenship in Palestine. 

    12)   Israel dissolution and Israelis have to flee. 

  4. Posted

    In the interview with Piers Morgan he said that all his bank accounts were frozen and that his possession were taken. He seemed to have worried a lot about his financial situation, whilst in jail. I highly doubt this man donated that amount of money. Is there any trust worthy proof that he donated so much money. This man is a grifter and will say whatever he wants to gather support online. 

  5. Posted

    @BlueOak I am sorry but FOX news is not as radical as those internet spaces including twitter, etc. FOX news still has a liberal voice in their pannels. OAN is more radical BUT STILL. OAN is also not as blatlantly promoting racism and conspiracy theories as you see it happening online. This crazy to say but they are still better.

    @hoodrow trillson True! It is actually quite interesting why the internet radicalizes us. The common explanation was echo chambers, but it turns out that your real life is a bigger echo chamber than your online life. Online you are way more confronted with differing views. Even if you are watching people with similar views, you are often watching them react to opposing views. Whereas in real life you just did not really care about the others. The people around you was what you cared for and those have usually similar thoughts than you. 

    But the confrontation with opposing views is not the only driver of radicalisation in my opinion. A big factor has to be the attention grabbing mechanism at play and the underlying attention industry, the cognitive stage of capitalism. 

  6. Posted

    Radicalization is crazy nowadays. 

    It really kickstarted during the Covid pandemic. Trust in academia, media and institutions erroded, we now live in the reign of idiots. Conspiracy theories, ideologies, anything that feeds the ego, is spreading fast. And Idiots don't have to feel ashamed anymore. They have gained a critical mass to self validate and all moderating barriers (academia, conventional media, institutions) are extremly weakened. 

    When the left goes left, the right goes right. 

    Who knows where this will end. But some amount of violance is almost guaranteed. My hope is that the left gets rid of stupid ideologies and starts convincing some of the moderate idiots. 

  8. Posted

    The things that shocks me, is that israelis are fine with creating an ethno state. 

    Imagine the US or any developed country came out and said "we will from now on give special priviledges to christians". This would be crazy. But if Israel does it, it is somewhat okey and I don't know why. Every developed country needs to seperate State and Religion and so should Israel. There should not be an exception for Israel. 

  15. Posted · Edited by Philipp

     

    here is a quick video on the history of the jewish people. Judaism is as old as people believing in Zeus. Unfortunate that we don't have any Zeus worshippers anymore.

    It is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel regarding this conflict. The border are already skewed so much in the favor of Israel. I am not sure if Palestinians will ever be fine that. 

  17. Posted

    Have you read "Refuse to Choose"? The perspective given in this book is quite unique. It states, that you should not do one of the things that motivates and interests you, but you should do ALL of the things that interest and motivate you. Leo for example also did psychology, politics, spirituality, dating (and explored game design and buisness for some time). Of course you should not be all over the place, thats why you need to be organized and focus on one or two things at a time. Maybe have a routine for 15 minutes each day, where do something else that interest you. 

    I think the lesson of this book is:  Don't waste your trying to choose that one thing you want to do, and instead figure out how you can do a lot of it ( even if you just for 15 minutes a day) 

  20. Posted

     

    I am curious if anyone saw this video. 

    I found it interesting how there are 3 different perspectives in this video, instead of the usual 2. 

    Also I am not fully sure who I agree with. Of course not with joe rogan.

    I am not sure if Johnny Harris presents a genuine stage yellow perspective, in seeing some value in Joe rogan and not hating people you disagree with. 

    Hasanabi is also convincing in his opinion that you should not be that lenient with individuals like joe rogan. 

     

    Curious if anyone has sawn it (or wants to see it) and has an opinion.

  22. Posted · Edited by Philipp

    My friends who are usually extremly deep on anti trans, anti leftist and anti vax stuff, actually like him. The only thing that bothers them was his apparently pro Israel stance. He seems to appeal to some young people who rejected conventional politics. 

    One quality I like about him is that he makes a real effort, to not talk bad about his opponent. 

  25. Posted

    @Lila9 Nice, thorough answer. I would however be skeptical of claiming sex is not a big deal back then. And man not claiming females and getting jealous if they get fucked by someone else...Maybe if it were like orgies and multiple man would be fucking a woman at the same time. I do also believe rejecetion had to be a thing back then. A woman was surely not letting anyone fuck her.

    FROM A SYSTEMIC POINT OF VIEW sexual selection is an incredibly important evolutionary process. It is like evolution on steroids. Sexual attraction is not just fun and games. It was key for selecting highly effective genes.