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  1. @creator20 I would not sweat over trying to remember how clean your car was, or any other superfluous details, when you had that conversation 5 months ago. Nor would I reflect on how I come across if I were you, if it is only to avoid unpreventable attacks based on personal insecurity. Granted, I was not there in your conversations, and I have very incomplete information, but speaking as a female, I would just look for better friends or a more woman-friendly workplace. If that is not possible for you, then work on being less triggered when people say “X is objectively better than Y.” When you get to stage green and above, that statement makes no sense whatsoever, but it’s not your job to correct others’ errors about this topic. These people are, for reasons that are not anyone else’s business, lying to themselves and others about the nature of reality, to their own detriment. Pro-tip: You are not responsible for other people’s self-deception. Just live your life, be fearlessly yourself, and don’t give a thought to what anyone else thinks of it.
  2. UC Berkeley Center for the Science of Psychedelics Check it out. It’s exactly what it sounds like.
  3. I’ve been on antidepressants for 20+ years, and I wouldn’t have been able to do my personal development work without them. They don’t correct a “chemical imbalance”—that’s been disproven. They do help some people and are worth a shot if nothing else works. Ideally, no one would need antidepressants, but this isn’t an ideal world. If your doctor recommends them and they help you, don’t let anyone talk you out of them.
  4. Antidepressants are a mixed bag, but just say no 👎 to the benzodiazepines. They make a person physically dependent (even addicted) very quickly, and getting of them is usually difficult. Try hydroxyzine for attacks as needed, as well as an antidepressant that can also help with anxiety, such as paroxetine. Many non-professionals say not to take medication at all, but it sounds like you have some issues that could benefit from these medicines, so your analyst may have a good idea.
  5. @Hello from Russia I’m in a Spiral Dynamics group on Facebook where most of us has to have some yellow to even survive socially in the group for more than a month. Most of us are intellectuals, have advanced graduate degrees, etc. Apparently, a thought leader of chaos theory (something I know nothing about) is also a member of the group. It would be interesting to run a poll to see if anyone has kids and how many. That said, I am a fairly attractive female, age 39, and have never been married and have no children. I am dating an orange/Achiever 50-something millionaire who also has never been married and has no children. We’ve focused on our careers our whole working lives, and time got away from us. Also, from our perspective we just don’t jibe with most people because we think independently and value our freedom. So yes, we failed to pass down our genes 🧬 but most people just aren’t like us. We may end up together with kids in the long run (not that long as we’re getting old!), or we may end up like Oprah and Stedman 😏. I live in a blue area where blue people do reproduce, but until very recently it was only at replacement level for most ethnic groups. I’m not sure if this year and next will see fewer or more babies than average due to COVID19. If people were intelligent, there would be fewer, but lockdown left a lot of people bored with nothing to do so 😘. I do not see any babies for me in the near future.
  6. I’ve encountered men who believe that way. The problem with that POV, even from the rapist’s perspective, is that you get what you ask for. One male I spoke to was very upset that all of his girlfriends were sluts and whores. They all cheated on him and had no self-respect, no class, no ambition, and were not marriageable. I laughed at him and asked, “What did you expect? If you think all women are sluts and whores, you will only be attracted to sluts and whores and vice versa. The high class women you dream of banging will be repelled by you.” Now, before you fuss at me about my interpretation of that perspective: 1) An amoeba has no concept of rape because when it reproduces, it does so by mitosis (it splits in two.) To an amoeba, there is no such thing as rape. 2) To a human at the red stage of spiral dynamics or the opportunist stage of ego, rape is an act of dominance of the strong over the weak, and it is right to be strong, so there is nothing wrong with rape. Rape can likely be justified at other stages, but those stages it is the most obvious to me. 3) At very high stages of consciousness and ego transcendence, free will is an illusion, and so is the body. Rape (at a lower level of consciousness) is generally considered a violation of the body and free will because there was no consent, so at that very high level of consciousness, rape cannot exist, either. That all being said, most humans in Western society exist at a conventional or post-conventional ego state and are at blue/orange/green/yellow parts of the spiral, where rape is viewed as real and most certainly wrong or at the very least illegal. To get along with the rest of society it’s socially advantageous to understand that viewpoint, but it’s even more helpful imo to understand the others, at the very least for self-protection.
  7. Get a full-time job as a cashier at Whole Foods. They make $15 an hour.
  8. I’ve read about people who do this already. Get a Ph.D. in counseling psychology and certification as a life coach. Then start a private practice doing whatever you want to do. That way, you’ll have the credentials and the practical experience to work in psychology but also the ability to work along the fringes of the field and do whatever you want to do.
  9. This what I am going through right now. Of course, the pandemic isn’t helping all that much. That said, I think I have evolved a lot since I entered COVID-19 isolation. I agree to an extent. They say you’re the average of the 5 people you hang around most, but I’m the only one into spirituality, personal growth, spiral dynamics and metaphysics. My interests are kind of isolating, but it’s my choice.
  10. Be present. Be honest. Be real. I realize that sounds simple and obvious, but try it. Be the most you can be with this person. If it still doesn’t work out, you’ll at least know that you gave it your all.
  11. Hi, I have identified as post-conventional re: Leo’s latest video. It is very conventional (conformist, expert, achiever) so I survive as an achiever. Needless to say, I am not happy at work but I need this job. Until I can find something more Strategist, how can I survive in a conventional, high pressure workplace?
  12. Get a pomodoro app and learn the pomodoro technique.
  13. Sorry if I missed it, but I really enjoyed your “Why Women Fall for A**holes” video, but I couldn’t find a video like “Why Men Fall for B**ches.” Men say they want the angel but fall for the wh*re. I’m curious to hear a man’s perspective on why.
  14. I just want to let you know from a patient's perspective that you may be idealizing the psychiatrist's role a little bit. The majority of psychiatrists I know are just as conventional as any other field, many are atheists at stage Orange, and they don't take too kindly to a belief in the supernatural or prescribing psychedelics. Some of them won't see female patients if they get pregnant, partially because they don't want to get sued due to side effects, and partially because they don't like the idea of the mentally ill reproducing (I have horror stories). What many psychiatrists focus on is medication management. There are psychiatrists who do what you dream of, but they have to start their own practices as they are swimming upstream. Also, many private psychiatrists in my area (southern US) don't even take medical insurance, leaving the poor out of luck or dependent on county services. You sound more of a fit as a general practitioner or integrative medicine. You will see plenty of mentally ill people in your practice should you go that route, and you will have more freedom to pursue multidisciplinary treatments as a GP than as a psychiatrist. I honestly feel psychiatry is not that great a fit for you given the current state of things, and that you dodged a bullet by not being accepted into a program. Sorry, but congratulations