Itsokimok

Member
 View profile  See their activity

  • Content count

    63

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Posts posted by Itsokimok

  1. Posted

    I've been thinking about my values and among them are self-actualization, wisdom, truth, love, beauty, consciousness and spirituality. I feel like wisdom, truth, beauty, consciousness and spirituality are very similar. Especially wisdom/truth and consciousness/spirituality. Beauty seems to be present in all of them. What is the distinction between these things would you say?

     

  2. Posted

    @Nahm Yeah, I think that I'm here and that I'm a person. I don't know for sure though. I guess I'd just hate to be here again as another "person" and going through "life" which seems to have circumstances, many of which aren't pleasant. Something seems to be suffering, whether it's a person or not. That something seems to be me and other people also seem to be suffering a lot. If this is not what's actually happening, I'd like to know. I guess I do want an awakening experience to see how things actually are..

  4. Posted

    I'm scared of non-duality. Remember that episode (The Radical Implications of Oneness)  where Leo talks about how you will know what it's like to be all other people in all other situations and animals? People and animals that appear other than you in your current life, at one point, you will be them. It's totally terrifying! I can't even comprehend the magnitude and terror of that. This is extremely threatening because I feel like if it's true, I'm basically screwed and not even dying at the end of my life isn't going to do shit because I'll just be born again and who knows who or what I'll be and what a terrible existence I could live. I could be born in the Middle Ages during The Plague for fuck's sake or become a pig in a slaughterhouse. It's like existence is inescapable. Is there a way to stop being born again? Is enlightenment the answer? Nirvana in Buddhism? Exiting Samsara altogether? But my motivation is not positive. My motivation is that of a terrified human who feels trapped. Not a great motivation for awakening. This is why I sometimes wish the materialist paradigm were true because at least that way I'll never be alive again  to worry about the terror of infinity after this life is over. Btw, I don't know what I believe. I'm trying not to believe things without direct experience. Like many of you, I want to have an awakening experience. but with my fear, I suspect it won't be a pretty experience. 

  6. Posted · Edited by Itsokimok

    I have 6 questions to ask a life/personal growth coach for my career exploration journey. Would anyone currently working as a coach be willing to spare a few minutes to briefly answer my questions? I can DM them to you and you can just reply back with your answers.

    To clarify. I'm looking to interview a coach about what it's like to be a coach as a possible career path for myself. Just 6 questions to answer very briefly via DM. I don't want to take up too much of your time.

    Thank you much in advance.

  8. Posted

    Abuse is a humiliating, degrading experience that causes shame in survivors. Even if it's obviously not your fault, just the fact that you were violated makes you feel diminished and exposed. I know that very well in my head, but damn, the shame is still there. When I look at articles on how to heal self-blame and shame, it often says, "stop blaming yourself". Well, I know. The question is how??!! If I try to use my mind to do it, it doesn't work because this feeling isn't rational. The shame is living deep in my body/psyche, not just in my head.  

  9. Posted

    I'm nowhere near this stage, but I find this intriguing. @Knowledge how would you explain that person showing up next week and telling you how their week went then? Why is there that consistency and sense of continuity and logic? I'm very curious. 

    So far, I feel like all I know of existence is my consciousness. That's the only thing I know for sure. But other people seem very real. I'm afraid of them, I love them, I hate them, I find them interesting... I don't know for sure they exist but I feel as if they exist. I have thoughts and emotions about them and there's this continuity and logic that I asked you about. 

  12. Posted

    So I've been diligent about my daily 1 hour meditation lately, but I have a problem. When I note the thoughts as they come and let them go by not resisting them but not holding on to them, after a while my mind settles and my awareness becomes clearer. That's how you're supposed to meditate right? However, I noticed some thoughts are really good ideas for me to contemplate later on or even just ideas about what to do to improve my life. These ideas are better quality than the ones I come up with when I'm not meditating. But when I write down these ideas as they come while meditating, my mind doesn't ever settle and I'm missing the point of meditation. But when I meditate how I'm supposed to, I'm unhappy about forgetting those thoughts and ideas that I like so much. If I don't write them down, I forget them. Any suggestions? 

  14. Posted

    If you're trying to awaken to Truth but have a bunch of childhood trauma, do you have to heal most of that before you even think of pursuing awakening, using psychotherapy? Or if you singlemindedly pursue awakening, you'll be forced to heal the trauma anyway, like there is no way around it? 

    I've been mostly focusing on healing trauma and it's gradually getting better with therapy, but I don't want to run out of time to pursue awakening as that can take years and years! I've heard of nondual psychotherapy, which basically posits that "there is no "self" to be traumatized, there's no "self" to hold grievances against others and so the only way to heal trauma is to observe the painful memories in choiceless awareness. What do you think of this? Sounds like it's spiritual bypassing but also intriguing. 

  18. Posted

    I'm just getting into the outdoors and really want to go on solitary walks in certain parks, nothing crazy really but there are a few city parks where I live that are very big and quiet. They feel like the wilderness because they're so expansive and you don't hear cars anymore when you go deep enough into them. You can get a good long hike and contemplate in a way that's hard to replicate in the concrete jungle. But these parks are full of coyotes and sometimes off leash, potentially aggressive dogs are running around.  When you look online, almost always there are tips against going to big secluded natural spaces alone. But how do you then do the work you can do in solitude? 

  20. Posted

    Is there such a thing as objective beauty standards? feel guilty because I think being fit and having sharp features looks beautiful. One of my female friends who's an awesome person, I would never be interested in her that way as she's at least 30 lbs overweight and has a rectangular body shape, no curves whatsoever and has no jawline. I feel bad because of the body positivity and fat acceptance movement and people emphasizing that we can find beauty everywhere if we choose to look. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. It just feels like I can't help what I find beautiful and hate to seem like a sexist jerk who helps perpetuate societal beauty standards. But I think of other guys the same too. They look better when they're fit and so do I. I make an effort to be healthy and fit. You know how there are also guys who have more feminine body shapes? I'm sorry to say but I don't think that's attractive. I want to, believe me, because I feel like an underdeveloped person for not being able to find everyone beautiful. Is this a stage orange problem or has nothing do with your spiral stage? Any thoughts or tips?