John Paul

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About John Paul

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  1. If you've grown and "verified direct experiences" yourself you can feel good about that without other's approval. The only person you should worry about controlling if you're going to worry about that is yourself, so why not use your energy to imagine a scenario where you love your family for whatever bullshit they buy into and at the same time value your own knowledge, experiences and, community while not letting anyone talk down to you. I'm guessing you feel alone because you have opened your mind and you feel like your loved ones haven't.. maybe you should also consider how many things your parents have experienced that you haven't, many of them they will probably never even tell you. You could also imagine being at ease with millions buying into propaganda, hating you because they are perceiving you as a member of a group or community etc. and you being unscathed by this. I could also be wrong about many, many things. Ask God or whatever; ask the silence
  2. Life has twists and turns. Why not do what feels right in your heart?
  3. I just find it pleasurable to imagine them and act mysterious with myself in my own head. It doesn't really matter to me what's real or not because I'd rather imagine cool things and have fun with them.
  4. Yeah... pretty synchronistic because it's been happening a lot lately at work. I think I'm helping myself say things to people in my head that I want to say but wouldn't actually say to like.. get it out of my system. Sometimes it's angry things or nice things that for some reason I feel like I wouldn't say. I'd call the whole thing daydreaming though is really what it is for me.
  5. From my POV: spiritually-yes, emotionally-yes... and in for other areas of life maybe a little but I think there will be a plateau because the person won't get up and go practice living life and taking action. But I think if someone experiences mystical states or whatever while meditating there is probably high potential of positive effects crossing over to other aspects of life like relating to others compassionately or being open-minded to new ideas.
  6. @Conscious life What do you believe god is? Have you experienced god? What's your motivation for asking these questions?
  7. Good for you Yeah... there is an abundance of homophobia in the world... it sucks
  8. Hello Actualized.org. What stage of Spiral Dynamics do you believe you have developed to in your moral line? Why? I'd like to hear details or even personal stories along with why you believe you are at the stage you are at as well as any details or stories about stages you've been through. Please be vulnerable and kind. If you don't know what lines are at all, go and see Leo's video-Spiral Dynamics - Important Insights & Nuances If you know nothing about SD at all, don't jam up the thread with BS please. Leo and others, what documentation of the moral line do we have? Please share any resources here and let's remain open-minded and truly skeptical (obviously). Thank you! I believe that I am at stage ORANGE. I believe this because I follow my own moral compass, not one suggested to me by the church (for e.g.) or some sort of group that is focused on human or animal rights or the environment (for e.g.). I'd like to share a couple of ways in which I've lied to myself in order to convince myself that my moral compass was more developed than it actually was (Why? The ego and self-glorification of course). I've tried to convince myself that "Oh, I believe in Universal blah blah blah.. *politically GREEN ideaologies* And therefore my moral line is stage GREEN." But in action I consume a lot of material waste, slack on educating myself when it comes to the timeline of equal rights and practical systemic change, etc. Really I just do whatever the fuck I want to do; I don't mean in a RED way, I mean in an ORANGE way. I know that I am beyond stages RED and BLUE in the moral line because my personal experience of stage BLUE morality was based around misinterpretations of early Leo videos and that's how I constructed my morality through stages BLUE through blue-ORANGE. Funny! While I was in stage blue-ORANGE I lied to myself constantly that I was in stage YELLOW morality simply because my stage BLUE morality included the conceptof relative morality.. which of course is different in practice than actual "transcendental morality" which is what Leo labeled consciously doing the right thing in the moment versus morality being fixed in one of his older videos. Is buying a plastic Starbucks cup of coffee before going to exercise a signal that I'm beneath stage YELLOW morality? I don't believe so but I believe that being a lazy, low-productive person who won't prioritize tweaking my life in order to not have to buy plastics all of the fucking time is. I wrote that as an example but also for those above me to let me know if I am understanding the moral development line in SD accurately. If there's something obviously contradictive in my writing point it out to me! I know you will… Thanks! (I will share stories of what I believe were times I was developing through other stages of the emotional line after some discussion)
  9. Hello Actualized.org. What stage of Spiral Dynamics do you believe you have developed to in your emotional line? Why? I'd like to hear details or even personal stories along with why you believe you are at the stage you are at as well as any details or stories about stages you've been through. Please be vulnerable and kind. If you don't know what lines are at all, go and see Leo's video - Spiral Dynamics - Important Insights & Nuances If you know nothing about SD at all, don't jam up the thread with BS please. Leo and others, what documentation of the emotional line do we have? Please share any resources here and let's remain open-minded and truly skeptical (obviously). Thank you! I believe that I am stage orange-GREEN or just GREEN or GREEN-yellow. I don't know! I believe this because I am starting to allow and honor or appreciate all of the emotions (GREEN?), not just certain ones. This is not always a straightforward path because I am not currently in therapy, receiving coaching, or a part of any supportive, open-minded groups consistently. I sometimes choose to turn off certain emotions and only allow certain emotions. If I go snowboarding, I can't be feeling sad or ashamed because they aren't confident. I have to choose joy or anger. This in my mind is SD ORANGE along the emotional line but maybe stage GREEN-YELLOW for me personally because I am consciouslysuppressing/choosing emotions to be productive/creative versus doing this as often as possible. I'm not sure how much of the time and to what degree I am allowing or suppressing emotions, how much suppressed emotion is just stored somewhere inside of my being, what emotional healing is, and how much these notes are allowed to affect my behavior. My point is I don't know how much my general level of consciousness and ability to be honest is affecting my self-evaluation. Sometimes putting myself into all of this SD information can feel very fuzzy…can you relate? I wrote that as an example but also for those above me to let me know if I am understanding the emotional development line in SD accurately. If there's something obviously contradictive in my writing point it out to me! I know you will… Thanks! (I will share stories of what I believe were times I was developing through other stages of the emotional line after some discussion)
  10. *eye roll emoji*
  11. Leo, in your SD lines etc. video you listed these lines as the most important to consider in life: cognitive/values/main, emotional, moral, career/livelihood, health/nutrition, interpersonal relationships, spiritual/metaphysical, educational, political, psycho-sexual, kinesthetic. Would you add, subtract, or combine/change this list at all? What do you all think?
  12. What is an alien? Use your direct experience of aliens. Don’t think too many thoughts about what seems to be true... question what seems to be true until you’re just paying attention to what’s happening right now
  13. I am wondering if going to college will be a good way to get me to stage yellow. I feel like a post isn’t enough and that I need life coaching but I can’t afford Leo and don’t know one person to put that much faith in for a second opinion. I am 24 years old. I graduated high school when I was 18. I had motivation/laziness/concentration issues, self-esteem issues, issues with authority and structure and challenge (masculinity), had a spirit of rebellion/anarchy, and frequent (varying intensity) “negative”, “toxic” emotions. Some amount of these things are still in my psyche, I don’t know how much. I went to college for one semester (I think it was right after high school but I can’t clearly remember 🙁) and I dropped out during that first semester. My first jumps into stage green were Bernie Sanders, followed by dogmatic veganism, thinking about healthy eating. I went through many phases of addictions, trying to escape my emotional baggage. Two years ago I was introduced to what I’d judge as a good therapist. She taught me where my anger had been coming from and helped me be more honest with myself and start healing at a faster rate. I really appreciated her support. Her help, a little traveling, and then Leo’s spiral dynamics series (blue-turquoise) opened my eyes a little more to the beauty of feminism. After I returned home I think I was in stage orange/green. BTW I live on Oahu (Hawaii) and I was born here. Although I’ve done a good amount of traveling through the US as a kid with family, lived in Dallas for 6 months and travelled in Japan for almost 3 months, I think that more traveling is going to be a necessary step toward tier 2 in my development. I just don’t see it as the next step right now because of intuition and coronavirus. But I don’t know, I’m here for advice. Last December I quit my full time job and have been hanging out with people, doing yoga (very good), crashing at a friend’s houses, reading books from the book list, going through waves of health/splurging (splurging on food, I’m drug and alcohol free besides weed and the most popular psychedelics mostly LSD), using psychedelics (BIG healing), and dating a bit (a girl and I are falling in love now which makes my life feel even more chaotic). And I feel like I’ve really made it to stage green especially with reading the dating books, looking at what sex addiction is coming from, and attempting to heal or integrate my masculinity and femininity.... I love women and masculinity more and more. I love my life but I’m over it. I’m tired of judging leaders and therefore not becoming one. I’m tired of my ego telling myself that I’m turquoise but trying to cheat completely past yellow. I’ve released a lot of the past and I want to contribute to society, human development, and be a leader and/or a creator in my life. I also want to get more in touch with my artist. I moved into a mountain a couple weeks ago and have been staying in a tent in between staying at friend’s houses. My eating seems to fluctuate a lot. I’ve lost a lot of weight from detoxing/fasting and people notice and say things (I don’t feel like this is an issue besides using health as a distraction and it throwing me off balance/direction). I don’t use the vegan label or feminist label or any political ideology label. I am trying to identify with nothing but Love or Nothing. I’ve been dating and having conflicting thoughts about sexual freedom, addiction, dating/labels, yoga/tantra, energy, sexual cleansing/celibacy etc. I barely work, less than 8 hours a week on average and I don’t feel pulled in any direction besides maybe stumbling on purpose into some psychedelic shaman and pursue that as a path for some years/time. Do I need a structured path? As somebody who is dealing with confusion/low productivity in stage green but also taking psychedelics and contemplating a little throughout my days my reality is making me more confused. Self-esteem, depression, and laziness are coming up and even anxiety is showing its face which it hasn’t for a while. I need advice and support. College? Trade/massage/cooking school? Focus on finding life purpose (seems obvious)? Keep reading the tier two books from the book list and taking psychedelics and don’t add time consuming activities (I’m planning to do this no matter what direction I go as long as it’s still working)? Should I just throw out the model since that’s all it is and focus on being more present by minimizing my lifestyle and meditating more? Please dear angels and magical people! I need your different perspectives and experiences and am open to answering more questions. I may already be in stage yellow and just functioning very “low” and just missing my life purpose... I just feel lost. Please help. Thank you
  14. I've heard that I should wait at least 2 weeks between journeys. I've heard that I should wait at least 2 days between micro-doses. How should I strategize (schedule) my trips if I want to use micro-doses (a third or so of a strong gel LSD tab) and regular doses (1 LSD tab or maybe 2). Is a schedule itself unwise versus intuition? Could I take a micro-dose every three days and then a regular dose every 2 1/2 weeks if the dose is 2 days after the micro-dose? Also I want to stay mostly on topic but is there a maximum dose of LSD one shouldn't go over or is it again an intuitive thing? I don't expect anyone to have any answers that I don't but I'm looking for some quick advice because I just got my hands on a few tabs and a source and I want to begin taking them since I'm excited for this new year.
  15. @Leo Gura, you made me very curious in your "..Facets Of Awakening.." video when you mentioned different psychedelics hitting different notes. I think the reason is because you said something like "..it's a complicated subject for another time". Since my last and next journey will be induced by LSD, can you tell me what LSD is really getting to the bottom of? What "notes" is it more likely to be striking? Maybe this will be helpful information because I can use it to set clearer intentions and with contemplation and a high dose hopefully I can grasp a deeper realization of a certain facet of what is. Or maybe not, thoughts Leo or anyone?