Alistair Kershaw

Getting out of the friendzone

34 posts in this topic

Youve been friendzoned, that is the chess position your in. Make the best move in the position. There are pros and cons to being friendzoned. For one, your her FRIEND! Talk to her like a friend not a lover. Then get into the circle of her friend group. 


How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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38 minutes ago, integral said:

Youve been friendzoned, that is the chess position your in. Make the best move in the position. There are pros and cons to being friendzoned. For one, your her FRIEND! Talk to her like a friend not a lover. Then get into the circle of her friend group. 

 

Bro, if girl likes you, it's going to be easy, no need to "  Then get into the circle of her friend group. " And this is extremely manipulative and creepy too.

"Talk to her like a friend not a lover"

Wtf, the girl already sees you just like a friend and you want to reinforce it?

 

Clueless guys out. I pity the women that have to deal with this kind of men.

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@Tudo lmao what im saying is, its done, the friendzone is what is it, make a friend and use that situation for other opportunities.

Friend circles and social connections of the like are the easiest way to get a girl friend. This is not manipulation to get laid, its just basic flowing throw life. Be friends have fun, relax with it and another opportunity is around the corner with someone you might be more compatible with. 

Edited by integral

How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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5 minutes ago, integral said:

@Tudo lmao what im saying is, its done, the friendzone is what is it, make a friend and use that situation for other opportunities.

Friend circles and social connections of the like are the easiest way to get a girl friend. 

This shit just works if you are able to build really big social connections. For the average Joe, the ideal is just to be social, go to parties and all kinds of events and talk to girls there. Simple. 

Edited by Tudo

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6 minutes ago, integral said:

This is not manipulation to get laid, its just basic flowing throw life. Be friends have fun, relax with it and another opportunity is around the corner with someone you might be more compatible with. 

Yes, it is. Because you trying to make a girl think this is a real friendship when indeed all you want is to fuck her.

Nice guy type of manipulation. 

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8 minutes ago, Tudo said:

Yes, it is. Because you trying to make a girl think this is a real friendship when indeed all you want is to fuck her.

Nice guy type of manipulation. 

Hes as of right now not her friend, she thinks they are friends and hes not! What im saying is actually be her friend. From there good things can happen outside of there relationship. I consider his chances with her 0. Move on to other things. 

12 minutes ago, Tudo said:

This shit just works if you are able to build really big social connections. For the average Joe, the ideal is just to be social, go to parties and all kinds of events and talk to girls there. Simple. 

go to parties with her friends...? Every gf ive had happened in small friend circles, i meet a guy, they have friends i meet the friends, i hit it off with one of them and its a 5 year relationship. Its very common.. 

 


How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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10 minutes ago, integral said:

Hes as of right now not her friend, she thinks they are friends and hes not! What im saying is actually be her friend. From there good things can happen outside of there relationship. I consider his chances with her 0. Move on to other things. 

go to parties with her friends...? Every gf ive had happened in small friend circles, i meet a guy, they have friends i meet the friends, i hit it off with one of them and its a 5 year relationship. Its very common.. 

 

Bro, you changed the subject, we were talking about meeting a girl for a romantic/ sexual relationship, not for friendship.

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@Tudo Going to recap my point: 

- Friend zoned, its done accept it

- Be her friend seeing as youve been friend zoned (change mind set)

- Go to outings with her and her friends, maybe youll find someone compatible with her friends

- Make the best out the the situation

Edited by integral

How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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6 hours ago, integral said:

Friend circles and social connections of the like are the easiest way to get a girl friend.

Agree a million percent

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@Alistair Kershaw There is one way to actually get out of the friend zone but it dose come with some risk. 

The reason why it's hard to get out of the friend zone is because they have formed a certain perception of who you are, even if the perception is not entirely true on your personality as a whole but once the perception is formed its almost becomes like concrete. So the best way to change this is to radically break the perception. So basically break the friendship, preferably in a dramatic way say like have an argument with her or something. Of course you also risk the chance of them hating you, but what it dose do is break down the originally friendship so a new one can now be formed so you get a second shot at coming in with the more lover frame. However

Its very gaming and could be argued low conscious so I wouldn't actually recommend actually doing it but it is worth knowing it. Maybe only if you truly loved her and wanted to marry her at all costs 

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The way to get out of the friendzone, is to let her see that you are with a hotter girl than her. This will put her in competition mode.

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The best way to get out of the friendzone is to disappear for a period of time and then reopen with a sexual frame there is no other way unless she decides she likes you all of a sudden.

I would gradually peel away from her and keep it to small talk and let er hit you up, your only going to hurt yourself more by remaining her friend tbh.

If you want platonic female friends its important to make the distinction in your head whether your going to actively set a sexual frame and see what happens or be friends. Dont be her freind for 9 months and then throw a curve ball thats weird and shows how uncalibrated you are.

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58 minutes ago, Bando said:

The best way to get out of the friendzone is to disappear for a period of time and then reopen with a sexual frame there is no other way unless she decides she likes you all of a sudden.

Yeah you're right, this has happened to me before. It didn't work out with the first girl i ever had a crush on for the same reasons as this post. I ended up breaking contact with her completely, after a couple of years I saw her at a party and went in directly with a sexual frame and it was on from the get go. I couldn't possibly imagine that working while we were still 'friends'. 

1 hour ago, Bando said:

If you want platonic female friends its important to make the distinction in your head whether your going to actively set a sexual frame and see what happens or be friends. Dont be her freind for 9 months and then throw a curve ball thats weird and shows how uncalibrated you are.

That's a great point. I'll do that from now on, it's pretty clear where I've fucked up. The worst part is I know where I've fucked up and in general I'm usually good at setting a sexual frame when I'm interested. I think I had her too much on a pedestal which caused me to play it too safe. Just rookie mistakes I'll try my best to avoid doing in the future.

Thanks

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On 5/27/2022 at 9:47 PM, Arcangelo said:

Girls don't shit where they eat bro. Unless you can't help yourself don't hit on girls that are working. It's the their job to be nice to you.

She was never your friend...

She was doing her job...

LOL!

My thoughts exactly.

@Alistair Kershaw Man I hope you are 18 tops.

You don't think anyone has ever met a friend or significant other through connecting with an employee? C'mon man.

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