Self-enquiry awakening report.

[AminB501]

I want to share an experience I had during self enquiry. I have done self enquiry many times and I have a discernment by now of what pure consciousness is, and how to remove what is not through neti-neti.

So I was seeking with questions like, what is that is aware of my experience? What is left if i remove every objective element from my experience? What is the nature of the knowing with which I know my experience?

As I asked the last question of one very similar I sort of came to a memory of my experience and saw as if my existence was so because of the existence of the things I was experiencing. Like if my experience go flipped from something inside experiencing out, to outside experiencing inside. It's like i went from living in a position seeing the outside world to being the outside. Like things outside where eyeballs and I was empty, I'm sure this is what is meant by "the universe is experiencing itself".

It's like if I told you looking at a wall, what is the nature of the knowing which knows the wall? That is the wall, in terms of the awareness of course is empty but is the wall and everything you can see around you, anything can know. From there of course you see that you're nothing.

What do you think? Is this a genuine insight? It kind of feels apparent to me now but i want to get some external opinion.

Edited August 22, 2021 by AminB501

[Malekakisioannis]

@AminB501 genuine insight as in: another achievement for me? Then no. Go further, to the point no question remains and no insight is important.

[Ry4n]

Very good progress, hitting that "pure consciousness" can be a blissful experience; by being that you become the world. No inside your skin vs outside your skin. Totally empty yet totally alive. 

You may find surrender and do-nothing pair nicely with these exercises; it's like the less words/questions are present the more potent those questions become. It's all about the timing. In that space of pure silence, not knowing, surrender of all beliefs and attachments, acceptance of all that is...from that place....what are you then? What's left? The answer will not serve your intellect in anyway, but intuitively  you'll know. And in the end that's all you'll ever need. Satisfied as fuck!!!

I've also found yoga asanas really good for sharpening the brain and staying grounded through this work. I can't overemphasise staying grounded. 

[AminB501]

@Ry4n cool thanks! 

[Endangered-EGO]

@AminB501 Yes that's a genuine insight into what you are. You're the consciousness, not the thought about consciousness or the representation of itself. You should also know that you are not a human that has consciousness, but consciousness that experiences the body right?

It's fun to play with that realisation.

You're not this not that, now you found the emptiness that is distinct from this and that. What you can do now is "know" the consciousness in every qualia/percept/sense/object. Just like maintaining the knowledge of what you are. I'm not sure what teachers talk about that.

[AminB501]

@Endangered-EGO More than the emptiness, which I realized before, what I mean is the inversion in my reality from believing that i'm the one who looks to being what I'm looking at. I don't know if i'm explaining myself well it's difficult to explain, but besides emptiness, this experience really doubles or quadriples down on the depth of the emptiness. As I researched about it's called, insight into the nature of objective experience, or the world of objects, which comes after the insight into the nature of consciousness. Rupert Spira talks about it very beautifully.

[Endangered-EGO]

@AminB501 We're talkingabout the same thing.

 

Somehow I always get trapped in mind again, until I meditate. And then I'm back in ego mind.

 

[Flyboy]

http://www.awakeningtoreality.com/2007/03/thusnesss-six-stages-of-experience.html

This may help contextualize this stage for you.  AtR has some of the deepest material you will find on awakening (which also means you probably won't understand it until you are close to that stage yourself, FYI).

[AminB501]

@Endangered-EGO about this I think I can help, in this situation you have tension between going to "ordinary life" and "ego mind" this creates a duality, but more practically means that you're not too good in ego mind. In my experience this is produced when the mind unconsciously tries to jump from a current state into a desired state and sees that is not working. I recommend you to sit in meditation, bring these feelings to mind and stay with them until you lose the negative response of your body to them, it's like exposure therapy.

When you get to the point that you body is not tense towards this fact then you'll be indifferent and can reach the state easier. Although It can happen that them you're tense for another reason and have to focus on that, can happen multiple times more. I hope I have explained well.

 

 @Endangered-EGO @Flyboy

Edited August 24, 2021 by AminB501

[Inliytened1]

On 8/22/2021 at 1:46 PM, AminB501 said:

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What do you think? Is this a genuine insight? It kind of feels apparent to me now but i want to get some external opinion.

Good work!  However if you are asking us if it was a genuine insight then it wasn't enlightenment...but you are on the right track   self inquiry is a very powerful tool.

 

[AminB501]

@Flyboy this is very cool, where can I find the spices of this concepts? Are they in some Buddhist texts? I would love to read them all.

[Flyboy]

On 8/24/2021 at 1:48 PM, AminB501 said:

@Flyboy this is very cool, where can I find the spices of this concepts? Are they in some Buddhist texts? I would love to read them all.

Well, AtR has a 1000 page pdf you can download for free that should get you started (I have not read it yet, but heard great things).

Depending on where you're at, Seeing that Frees is one of the best deep dives from the Buddhist perspective.  You would do well to understand other things first though, like the stages of insight, Jhanas, maps of the path, etc.  So maybe invest time in MCTB and TMI first / simultaneously.  I'm also really enjoying the book "Awake" by Angelo Dilullo.  There are about a billion books on Dharma, some of which cover specific aspects really well.  I think you'll have to dive in and then start following your interest / personal progression.  Buddhism has one of the most systematic approaches, but don't discount the value of exploring various other methods as well as you go.  We're after Freedom, not a tradition   Also don't forget that doing the practice is the most important part, by far.

[Nahm]

@AminB501

Awesome. Sounds like an incredibly insightful experience indeed, good for you man. Undefinable, but ‘collapse of the knower & the known’ comes to mind. Keep rockin that path. 

[The0Self]

On 8/22/2021 at 2:46 PM, AminB501 said:

Like if my experience go flipped from something inside experiencing out, to outside experiencing inside.

Congrats!

Some call this Witnessing or the figure ground reversal. Almost like looking in at the world instead of out at it? Very, very transcendent? State of pure subjectivity. It's an auspicious sign. It's often brought about by turning attention away from all objects no matter how subtle, but it can arise for many reasons. Don't reflect on it too much though as that creates a divide -- just inquire as normal and treat the memory of the state like any other object -- ignore/relax/turn-away-from it / attempt to find its assumed knower.

You can continue to do self inquiry on Witnessing itself, or perhaps just abide as Witnessing and solidly enjoy it... until it gets old and you move on to whatever the next step is.

Edited August 27, 2021 by The0Self