Insecure & depressed about my height. Considering suicide

[Karmadhi]

@Olivia24 What term would you like me use? I said i find average girl to be rude term so i avoid using it. Talk it with preety india not me.

[Preety_India]

@Karmadhi I think using the term average doesn't lead to any further discrimination. Only a category. 

However when you say "an okay looking girl," it begs the question/thought that there might be another group that is considered "not okay looking" and that makes it really controversial and degrading, because to tell someone that they are "okay" or "not okay" is kinda making them feel like almost worthless either way, it's like telling someone they didn't make it through or they just barely made it through. 

That would be quite discriminatory if you ask me. 

Plus someone being called "okay looking" gives a sense that they have desperately made it to your validated or calibrated category of what you consider to be "fine" or "nice" this somehow adds layers to the validation you assume they should be pining for when in reality such validation itself is a huge question of human virtue and dignity. 

 

You're almost stepping on human dignity here when you're trying to categorize women. 

Men are also categorized as "less charming" or "boring" or "handsome" yet these categories aren't dehumanizing just descriptive terms

 

Yet calling someone "okay" is far more dehumanizing because it really borders on human dignity. 

So calling a woman average shouldn't be dehumanizing. 

For example you can call me an average girl. 

There are average men as well. Then it becomes sort of gender neutral. 

I am curious to know as to why you would think that the word average is so demeaning when it's the general usage. 

It could be that you have added extra layers of contempt to the word "average", and this is possibly your own projection and frustration. 

I never felt offended whenever you used the term average. 

 

Average can mean anything almost, it's highly ambiguous and quite safe because it doesn't create too many distinctions. 

Or is this because you think average women should not be in the same line as average men and so you found a way to lower average women even further so as to differentiate them from average men, as to be less worthy of average men. 

 

Edited August 6, 2021 by Preety_India

[Emeline]

On 05/08/2021 at 3:14 PM, Karmadhi said:

@Preety_India 5 .45  and 5 6 is not big difference. It is like 3-4 cm, that is fine. Difficult but doable, however i never saw one where guy is for example 172 with a girl that is 178 or 180.

If you have any example of a normal non special guy getting a girl taller than share with us, because i almost never see it when im walking on the street. I see max 1 inch difference where girl is taller, but that is it.

Maybe you are really young or don’t know lots of people ? I do know plenty of small guys who have dated /are married with tall girls . Do you know why ? Because (at least in Europe) really tall girls (above 1m75) who are not models have very limited options. So many cute smaller girls are dating the tall guys that they don’t have a lot of choice amongst the taller men so they’d rather date a small man with a great personality ...

[Tudo]

@Emeline lol

in another thread that is now locked you said the following: 

"Honestly maybe it’s because I am from Europe/France but I don’t understand your obsession with « women only want high status men ». But well, in Europe at least, high status men don’t want to date  /marry a hot girl that they have to pay. Why would they do that ? They want to be loved for who they are not for their money. Any pathetic loser can buy a young hot wife . Any middle class American/European can buy a young hot wife in a third world country they are even cheaper and hotter. But only desperate people (and/or people in denial) do that. What’s the point of marrying someone who tu doesn’t love you ? It’s smarter to « lease » e.g. if you want to have sex with hot girls you can have escorts, plenty of hot girls great sex and you don’t have to bear a spoiled entitled wife/girlfriend everyday ... I know lots of high status men, some of them are now in the top 3% earners  in US and they don’t want to buy a hottie. They’ d rather date and marry a high status woman even if she is a bit less hot or young than the poor young hottie who wants their money. It’s a real challenge . Because they want real love not a transactional relationship . I can’t believe american high status men are some sort of pathetic shallow losers in denial. Some of them might be ? But imo it’s a very weird and poor choice. High status men marry high status women . If they have to pay to have sex then having sex with escorts is a much better choice. Could someone explain me why american high status men would be willing to « buy » their dates/wives ? "

 

You are just clueless about what men desire in a woman, most men don't give a shit about your social status, what they really care about is how hot/young, and feminine the woman is .

Obviously, most men especially in progressist countries like France won't say it straightforward since this can be considered politically incorrect.

By the way, do you are aware of the fact men in countries like Sweeden are bringing women from third-world countries on a massive scale, right?

 

Edited August 9, 2021 by Tudo

[The0Self]

You seem very dead set on the idea that it's your height and so I understand how you might be feeling depressed about this, but unless you're like 5'5'' (but probably even then), it's not your height the vast majority of the time. I'm 5'10'' and I'm taller than many of my friends and shorter than many as well -- not many (men) in either category have issues with attracting women.

I don't know anything about height insecurity -- basically just never have thought or cared about it. It would have never even crossed my mind. I can guarantee you, if I somehow had height insecurity, that would be a cause of not being able to attract women -- if I were 2-3 inches shorter and didn't have success with women, all else equal with my current circumstance... well then that would not be possible since I don't have height insecurity... and it would not be possible without height insecurity.

Edited August 9, 2021 by The0Self