Jai

Spiritual Review and Progress

486 posts in this topic

May 2

One good thing was that I went over to my friends house and saw his little hang out and meditation pavilion. It was really nice. It was cool to see all the hard work he put in. He's got a really nice back yard and I'm looking forward to hanging out there. I'm glad to have gone over to hang a bit.

Today was a pretty solid day. I woke up at like 5:30 on my day off, got some good breathwork and meditation in. Then I studied for like 3.5 hours to hit my weekly goal which was good. Glad I accomplished that early. Rest of the day went on a hike with a friend and relaxed. So good day overall. Glad the warm weather is here. Also glad I'm feeling pretty connected overall. I'm on a nice streak of maintining God contact. If I have an off moment or an off day it doesn't last. It's really nice to have freedom from worry, stress, fear, doubt, etc. Sometimes I have some regret but that doesn't last. I do want to avaoid that. Also just been focusing on the path and finding contentment on the path. So happiness isn't in the future even though I am building a nice life for myself. Happiness is being on the path. There will always be work and difficulty and struggle, even in a nice future. So I can just be happy knowing I'm really in a good spot now and really connected with God.

Grateful for today - hung out with a good friend, cut my own hair and it looks decent, didn't rain during hike

+ Spiritual practice: Good but didn't chant. I want to get more consistent with chanting. That's something that's important for me.

+ Attitude of service: not stuck in my own problems good outward energy

+ Mental and emotional states: Good here, pretty content and on the positive side of things

+ Life habits: clean and disciplined. Even on a day off I don't take off days on good habits

Moved forward today

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May 3

Something good that happened today was I had enough time after work to get something to eat before my meeting. I made a really nice veggie sandwich and I was really hungry so it was really delicious. It was nice to make it home like that and to eat something quick. Glad I had enough time to do that.

Good start to the week and it was a good monday. I made some decent progress studying which was nice. Good morning spiritual session and I had a good day at work also. A lot of these days are really similar because they're pretty much all good days. I have good habits, bring God into my life. Try to grow some by studying to build a nice future, and try to contribute and do service at work. Nothing exciting, but things are going well. I come in here to review and it's pretty much always the same things over and over. I pray, meditate, do some wim hof method, exercise, live clean, try to hang with friends, study coding, get outside some. So all pretty good stuff.

Grateful for today - I didn't get wet walking to and from even though it rained pretty much all day, having two big monitors at work, good relationships with coworkers

+ spiritual practice: good here. Good morning session. Problem is when I go in to work I can't really chant or meditate during lunch.

+ attitude of service: good outward energy, trying to be helpful at work and get stuff done.

+ Mental and emotional states: in a good spot, pretty positive all around

+ Life habits also good. I've really cleaned up mindless phone use. I basically never check my browser on my phone, not on dumb websites. Not on my phone much at all. This was tough to break but I"ve been with this good habit for like 45 days.

Moved forward today

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May 4

Something good that happened today was I was at the grocery store and I bought some healthy food. When I was checking out I realized how nice it is to be able to buy whatever I want without really thinking about it. And it felt good to only want healthy food, I don't ever buy any junk food. So it was nice to look at the bag of groceries and just feel lucky I can feed myself.

Really strong day today I felt. At work I got a bunch done and I can notice the progress I'm making. It's nice to be able to write sql queries at work. It's been really satisfying to learn more about this database and basically teach myself how it works. A lot of these are becoming more natural so all I got to do is keep practicing. I also felt some really good energy after work, just this sense that I'm growing, that my life is heading in a good direction, that I'm trusting God, that I live mostly in a solid state of feeling connected and free from fear and doubt. So the big thing is just keeping this up. It's been a great year thus far. So get to do it all again tomorrow. I'm glad I'm really prioritizing work and have a long term goal here it makes work so much better to go to when I'm trying to build a nice future for myself.

Grateful for today - good conversation with a friend, possibly gonna hang out with a girl, we'll see but it's a possibility, sun came out in the afternoon

+ Spriitual practice: this is good but I'm left wanting more on the weekdays. 30 minutes doesn't feel like enough. Now that I'm going in to work I don't do a morning session. It's like I lose almost an hour of the day with driving to work and then walking in from where I park far away to get a little exercise. I can't add anything spiritual really on lunch at work. And I already get up at 4am so hard to get up earlier

+ attitude of service: good here - contributed some at work, helping people when something comes up. Just got to keep this orientation up.

+ Mental and emotional states - really strong and positive today. A lot of my days are the same which is good because they're mostly positive

+ Life habits: also good. living really clean.

Moved forward today

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May 5

One good thing that happened today was my walk out of work. Right when I leave work I usually feel really connected. I feel satisfied that I tried to work hard and contribute, I feel good because I set good intentions in the morning and followed through. Today was nice when I left work. I really notice God's presence then, I have a good sense of serenity and feel content. So I'm glad I feel like this.

Another good day overall. I felt a little dull mentally in the afternoon. I'm really putting in a lot of mental effort and exertion. Still had good habits and actions. Day by day it's a little progress. All that little progress adds up. Just another solid day all around. Can keep trying to do better at work. I also have to watch carefully my reaction to getting back in to online dating a bit. I just want to keep the same discipline and focus that I've had with sex ideal. I'm over 45 days of retention, I have good command over sex energy and I don't want to get too distracted here. I'd also like to move in the direction of meeting a girl so I want to put in a little effort. Although generally online dating feels kind of distracting and draining. So it will be a challenge to stay positive here.

+ Spiritual practice: extra evening session. Had a friend come over and do some prayer and meditation. Every day got to put God first.

+ Attitude of service: Good outward energy, not stuck in self, also just need to keep an eye out on this, always room for improvement. Really easy to focus on me.

+ Mental and emotional states - good here. On the side of positivity and optimism. Felt capable and more confident

+ Life habits: doing good. Consistently doing good actions. Consistently moving in the right direction. Have cleaned up some other smaller habits also that were kind of annoying. Doing way better not checking my phone all the time so I'm happy about that.

Moved forward today

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May 6

Something good that happened today was that I was driving home from work and a place where it's usually hard to merge was wide open. The other light was red so the two lanes were totally clear, I totally cruised into those lanes effortlessly and it just felt really nice to have it be wide open and cruise. I instantly recognized it and felt grateful. Sometimes the little things like this keep me with a good orientation toward life.

Grateful for not getting a flat tire on my bike when I hit a bump, got some nice swag from work - a shirt and a mug, good conversation with a friend

Another solid day but also faded in the afternoon. My eyes started to hurt some from looking at the computer. I had trouble concentrating. Still got some stuff done though which is good. Living really clean overall and studying some. Sometimes I get discouraged because it's so difficult. I really want to make a move in like a year and make more money and work remote. It will be difficult to do but I'm putting in the work. Hope I can get there in a year. So today was another solid day of good habits, good work, a little bit of recreation. Only problem is the online dating - it just feels like a distraction sometimes. I got to be careful because I still want to have a really good level of discipline in my sex ideal.

+ Spritiual practice - set aside time in the morning as always

+ Attitude of service - good outward energy

+ Mental and emotional states - overall pretty good . the only disastifaction really is with dating. That distracts me some, and I end up feeling like I'm missing something

/ Life habits - pretty good overall. Was distracted by some explicit images with online dating. Not exactly porn but it still ends up distracting me

Moved forward today

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May 7

One good thing that happened today was I figured out a join on a query that was really problematic. It had to do with the way the tables are configured and a complex function and after a lot of attempts I was able to figure it out. This was good because this morning I didn't have the best study session, I cut it short to avoid being frustrated. So it felt really good to figure out this difficult queyr at work. I've come a ways in the last month or two with my query skills so I'm really happy about that. This felt really satisfying to make progress like this.

Grateful for - a gift card from work, good phone conversation with a friend, nice morning chanting session

Good day all around. A little disappointed for not getting a good morning study session in but still doing good overall. I'm living really clean and I'm living at a high level all around. It's like I'm living a high performance life which is good. I'm about to finish a year at work so I'm reflecting how far I've come. I've really had a good year and I'm ready for another great one. I just have to keep investing in God on a daily basis no matter what. If that is first everything else falls into place. God gets all the credit for this year. It's been good because I've really turned to God on a consistent daily basis in a way that is significant and meaningful. That's the formula for me.

+ Spiritual practice: Extra morning session with chanting felt nice. Wish I had more time in the morning for this. Hard when I already give 30 min, wake up at 4 and study 2 hours before work. I'd have to wake up at 3:30 or cut in to my study time.

+ Attitude of service: Good outward energy, trying to contribute

+ Mental and emotional states: good here, existing on a pretty high level overall. Still get somewhat distracted by dating from time to time. Probably need to refocus there and get back to my celibacy goal. Really only have like 40 days left to get to 90

+ Life habits: good here. It takes some effort but it's easier than the bad habits dragging me down

Moved forward today.

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May 8

One good thing that happened today I rode my bike down a road that was just paved. It was kinda fun to be on such a smooth road. Usually roads can be kinda bumpy and this road was totally perfect so it was a cool feeling.

Grateful for - dinner with family, easy day at work, good book i'm reading

A bit of an off day. I didn't feel motivated at work today with a strong attitude of service. I wasn't resonating with energy like I normally like to be. Just an off day I guess. I did have a morning spiritual practice but I was just a little flat all day. I worked the college graduation ceremony doing something real simple by just hanging out in parking to direct people. Not much to do. But I should've been really joyful for that day. College gradaution is a great day, I remember mine, so it was a shame I wasn't more energized. I also felt off today because I feel a bit lonely. Online dating is really distracting. It's thrown me off a little bit from the normally focused mind I've been used to having. It just doesn't feel like it fits with everything I'm building. But it is also a resource to try to meet people I guess. So I have mixed feelings about that. I've met people in the past but now it doesn't feel like it fits at all. So that's really it I think I need to just not participate with that. When I do I end up feeling off. Especially since I've had so much discipline with my sex energy lately. When I get on online dating I end up feeling distracted and thrown off course. I might just have to meet someone however it ends up happening.

+ Spiritual practice: good morning session here. Started the day off right. Lost conectedness during the day though, can do a better job of reorienting myself

/ Attitude of service: not where I want it to be although i ended up doing dishes after dinner so that's good. Didn't have good outward energy though, kind of stuck in self

- Mental and emotional states: Felt off some today. Not the normally positive and optimistic person I've become. So need to get back on course. Also just the general distraction of online dating caused me to lose the good focus I normally have

/ Life habits: some good things, but also not up to my high standard. Let my apartment get a little cluttered, over ate at lunch and ended up feeling lathargic. So can improve here

Not a horrible day, but didn't exactly move forward the way I normally do.

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May 9

One good thing that happened today was I made progress through a part of code that had really stumped me. It was frustrating and today I was able to complete that part. It felt good because it removed the frustration and doubt. It just shows I need to stick with it and then I'll eventually understand it and gain a better ability. Big thing is to not get too discouraged and focus on the good things and progress.

Grateful for: weekly calls with a programming buddy, nice nap this afternoon, felt good after yoga

A good day in that my habits were mostly good except for eating too much for lunch. I did feel a little discouraged with my studies but I eventually made progress and felt more positive. In general a decent day off although I'd like a little more connection and faith. My faith was lacking a little bit. So was my vitality and energy which is kind of typical on the weekend. I don't bring the same intensity as the weekdays. Sometimes I'd like to be a little more motivated and excited on the weekends and more energized. Regardless a pretty decent day. Tried to be of service with a friend and to help him through a difficult time. We hung out and did a meditation and I went to his church with him which was cool. Hopefully he can turn to me for support and I can make him feel better.

/ Spiritual practice: good but I'm not chanting as much as before. On weekends I could do more for sure and fit this in.

/ Attitude of service: good in action with my friend. The rest of the day I was a little too concerned with my own problems and didn't have the outward energy I'd like.

/ Mental and emotional states: for most of the day pretty dull - then I made some good progress with my studies and felt more animated. Difficult times with my studies will happen, no way around it.

/ Life habits - good in some senses, but fell short by eating too much for lunch. It was total distraction and comfort seeking. Whenever I feel a little off I seem to always seek some sort of distraction instead of just recognizing how I feel and making improvments in what I'm doing. I mean I also do that so I shouldn't be too hard on myself. But other times I am caught a little off guard and fall into some sort of distraction.

Moved forward today

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May 10

One good thing that happened today was I got a lot of coding done. It felt good to have a monday off and to be able to code some. It was a slower pace and open ended. I could study some then go do something else and then come back to it. It felt good to make some progress. Coding is becoming a more regular part of my identity. I'm doing it basically every day and I work hard and it's not forced. The more I learn the more I'll like it I'm sure. So felt good to be able to do that some.

Grateful for: Monday meeting, free wifi from work, didn't get attacked by a stray dog

Really the only negative today was I got a little frustrated when running an errand. It wasn't horrible but I felt a little upset when I didn't get an answer I wanted to hear at the front desk. I wasn't anticipating any problems and was surprised and wasn't really ready. So my reaction wasn't the best. I need to roll with situations like that better.

+ Spiritual practice: Nice job today getting some chanting in. Good morning session.

+ Attitude of service: good outward energy, good orientation in general

+ Mental and emotional states: In a good spot today. Pretty focused except for getting briefly upset. For the most part positive and optimistic and living in faith.

+ Life habits: good here also. Nice day off and lived pretty clean. Staying up on things although I wish I had more time for my personal to do list. I need to put more focus on days off on getting things done on my personal to do list.

Moved forward today.

 

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May 11

One good thing that happened today was I wrote 2 queries in sql and knew exactly how to do it. I had a couple query requests and made them using the interface like always, then I just went and wrote then in sql, knew what to do and the queries matched. My understanding of this production database is improving quickly and I'm feeling more comfortable. So it feels good to undertand it deeper. I also printed out some of my queries to hang in my office. This is the favorite part of my job, getting to code some at work.

Grateful for didn't get rained on too much during walk to/from work, phone call with a friend, dad checking on my car registration

Solid day overall. Had a little dip in energy and I'm missing my long lunches like when I work from home. When I go in to work I go in a little later than I start at home and I don't really take lunches. So that I have to adapt to. Good effort today and decent outward energy. Felt good about life and was pretty positive. Really ready for the day. I've settled in to a really nice focused practice and daily habit. It's become really normal and natural to fill my day with solid things.

+ Spiritual practice - good here, waking up at 3:45am tomorrow so I can have 15 more minutes. 30 minutes leaves me wanting a little more. Hope I can get up. Something about getting up before 4 is a block. It's psychological. So hopefully tomorrow I can do it.

+ Attitude of service - good in action, but I'm a little defensive emotionally sometimes when requests come. Need to work on that - I'm not overwhelmed and I generally understand what's going on so I can be more positive with this.

+ Mental and emotional states: Good here. Living in faith and making improvements. Need to stay here and deflect all negativity.

+ Life habits: Good also, pretty disciplined day all around.

Moved forward today.

 

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May 12

One good thing that happened today was I had a good conversation with a friend. I'm lucky I can chat with friends the way I do. I talked with him right when I got out of work and it was a nice way to end the work day.

Grateful for: able to cook a quick meal in my instant pot, privacy at work to focus, energy to do the dishes tonight so I don't have to do them before breakfast

Solid day overall. Felt a little dull at work for a moment and mentally fatigued. I'm giving great effort so this is going to happen sometimes. Still had a good study session and good day at work also. Life is really routine which is good, I have mostly good days. Summer will be good for a little more excitement - I got a camping trip planned and usually up in the mountains on the weekends. Will probably go by fast. This past year went by fast. Year ago I moved to this city and started work. Everything is great, I do have good friends, only thing is that sometimes I feel a little bored and lonely. Not a lot of social stuff going on with covid. Plus kinda alone and not really dating. That does bother me once and awhile. I've always liked it when I've dated more in the past and had a girl in my life. Just haven't found any opportunities and not putting much effort in there. I'm really focused on my goals and busy 60 hours a week with work and study. I kinda just want that to happen. In a year if I stay on course and keep putting in effort I think I'll be in a spot where I can really have a sweet life, so the sacrifice is worth it. Just can't let being bored and sometimes lonely get to me.

+ spiritual practice - got up at 3:45 am so I could have a longer session. Was nice to have a bit extra time

+ attitude of service - good here. good outward energy, good action, not stuck in self.

+ metnal and emotional states - also good, on the whole pretty positive. after work dipped a bit just because there isn't a lot of free time. Even getting into yoga class causes me to stay up late, postpone dinner, etc. Every minute of my day is pretty much accounted for mon thru fri

+ Life habits - good here. The retention streak continues although I was distracted some at yoga class by chicks of course. Still, I'm well on my way to goal of 90 days retention

Moved forward today

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May 13

Something good that happened is that I felt really energized after work. When I walked out of work it was nice out, I had a good day and I just felt connected. Overall I was just feeling strong today. Got some stuff done at work and made some progress with my coding which was good. So on the walk to my car I felt great. Had a conversation with the guy that puts the carts away at the store. That was nice also, hopefully things like that happen more often. I want to have good outward energy and talk to people.

Grateful for: got a computer course that work paid for, saw some coworkers for the first time in awhile, sticking to the retention goal

Good day which was great. Good energy and everything. Really the only negative was that I slept in some and didn't get a long meditation in. I don't want to make that a habit. Last night I did yoga and didn't get to bed until later so this morning I slept in. Other than that on the right side of the equation with being positive, good outward energy, did some good service today, and felt energized. Hope to carry this over to tomorrow.

/ Spiritual practice: negative on not getting a longer meditation and prayer session in. Still listened to a spiritual podcast, still stay connected and going to do a review and reflection now.

+ Attitude of service: good outward energy, felt like I was contribiuting and serving God today

+ Mental and emotional states: good here. Strongest day in awhile. Feeling better about the direction of things not that I was feeling bad. But overall feeling more convinced that I'm trusting God and on a good path.

/ Life habits: pretty good here but woke up late. That threw things off a bit. 

Moved forward today

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May 14

Something good that happened was I was sitting outside before the sun went down and it was warm with a breeze and all of this pollen or something like it was floating all through the air. It was really beautiful and surreal. I just felt a sense of awe with the beauty along with a sense of serenity. Just a really cool moment that stood out today.

Grateful for: looks like the mask mandate is going away happy for that, got my state tax return back, feeling more capable at work and with coding

Nice day today. Although again I overslept my alarm, today by 13 minutes even though I went to bed on time last night. Don't want to make that a habit. Good day though with coding, glad it was Friday, good day at work. Tried to get some stuff done and made some progress on projects. Also was just pretty connected overall. It feels good to not be stressed and to just be maintaining a solid level of well being and mental perspective and focus. It just feels nice to be on a good trajectory and it's worth the effort. I'm investing in God a lot and making great sacrifices and it's really paying off.

/ Spiritual practice - good morning session but missed out on whm breathing. I'm missing regular chanting now that I'm going in to work. Still had a decent morning session and doing review now.

+ Attitude of service : good outward energy here. Not stuck in inner turmoil. Good effort at work to be helpful and on top of things.

+ Mental and emotional states - good here. All with the exception of giving in when the alarm went off and not getting up right away. Other than that really strong and positive and where I want to live mentally and emotionally

/ Life habits - good except for not waking up on time. Need to clean my apartment also. I've been so busy it's kind of messy which is rare.

Moved forward today

 

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May 15

Something good that happened today was I was at a meeting and I really enjoyed the guys share. He had a good story and was pretty energetic and I'm glad I had went. Drove to another city with a friend to go so it was a nice weekend trip to do something I normally don't do. So overall it was a good experience.

grateful for: nice study sessions today, friend bought me a coffee, drove safely

A strong day and I'm on a nice streak. Once in awhile I'll have an off day but for the most part my days are really solid. Almost never have a bad day. I've had a nearly 2 month streak of really strong days and progress so I want to keep this up. Today I got a lot done with studying which felt nice. I also cleaned my apartment some, went on a bike ride, and went to this meeting and hung out with a friend. Great day off. Also really put God first. Had a nice morning chanting and meditation session and spoke with a friend on the phone. I just want to keep this momentum going. I've already been consistent for a year so it's critical that I look at what to continue doing and not on what is already done.

+ Spiritual practice - really nice chanting session, glad to be getting that in the mix. during the week not as consistent with that.

+ Attitude of service: good outward energy today. Not stuck in inner turmoil, looking to serve God and stay God focuses

+ Mental and emotional states: Solid here. Definitely on the side of positivity and connection

+ Life habits: Good here also. Felt good to really clean up my apartment some.

Moved forward today.

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May 16

Something good that happened today was I solved a coding problem. I had worked on it all week and today I submitted the answer which felt good. I was able to solve this completely by writing my own code without looking at answers. I also made a bunch of changes to improve it. Point is that today it felt good to finish that and have a nice sense of accomplishment.

Grateful for: good phone calls with friends, didn't get rained on during hike, good sleep

Another strong day today. Got some stuff done and still enjoyed a day off. Never really enough time for everything but it's good to be busy. I've really settled in to life and I want to keep up the high standard I've set. Went hiking with a friend which was nice. Got some studying done also. Just another regular weekend. also glad I'm not really worried about work. I can go in to the week knowing I can handle whatever comes up.

+ Spiritual practice: had a longer meditation session today and it was mostly good although I got mentally distracted and went pursuing some attractive thoughts.

+ Attitude of service: good outward energy overall, not stuck in self too much

+ Mental and emotional states: In a good spot today, pretty positive and connected. Never really fell into fear, doubt, self pity, worry, negativity, etc. Mostly I'm always on the right side of things

+ Life habits: pretty good today, living pretty clean overall

Moved forward today

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May 17

One good thing that happened today was I was able to work from home so I didn't have to go out in the rain. It ended up raining hard and it's nice to not have to get caught in the rain.

Grateful for: growing up I could play outside alone a lot, nice quick nap on lunch, got feedback on a code project I'm working on

A good day in action but felt a little dull. That happens sometimes when I get extra hours studying on the weekend. I can end up feeling dull for Monday. This past weekend I got a lot done and I didn't feel real fresh today. My mind and eyes were a little worn out from studying on the computer. Still had a decent day though. Just not in the positive and optimistic place I'm used to. I was over 24 hours last week studying so I'm glad I reached the limit. Probably still gonna try to get up early and study tomorrow. Hopefully feel refreshed. Might work from home also. Anyway, I'm used to really strong days so it's been awhile since I didn't feel really energized. Mentally I was also a little agitated today and can get a little agitated from time to time. I'm really fortunate though that I got great co workers and am on a strong team.

+ Spiritual practice: Did a chanting session during lunch, one of the benefits of working from home

/ Attitude of service: Not the best outward energy. Not in a bad spot just not as energetic or enthusiastic

/ mental and emotional states: not on the negative side of things, but also wasn't truly positive like I've been . Really just a product of probably feeling a little worn down. Got to look out for this

+ Life habits: good here. Lived really clean today, avoided eating pizza. Lots of benefit from living clean

Moved forward today

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May 18

One good thing that happened today was I saw this cute girl at the grocery store and I felt a solid attraction. All of the discipline I'm having with my sex ideal is becoming evident. I'm really working toward controlling this so that I can do retention long term like I have for the last two months. Point is that having a really solid attraction toward cute girls is great. It also wasn't really lustful, just attracted toward her. I can't wait for this covid stuff to be over so I can be more social. I really like the real interaction more than online dating. Pretty soon I probably should just start talking to people and be more social again. Anyway, this was a really good moment because I realized how in control of my energy I am and how when I'm in control the attraction feels really natural and healthy.

Grateful for: getting some coding problems done, didn't get rained on, gonna take nice vacation this summer

Turned it around from yesterday. I'm glad I don't let a single off day grow. Was thinking about getting a little extra sleep but didn't need it and got up. Had a good study session and decent meditation session. Felt a little weak in the cold shower so went to hot 3/4 of the way through. Then had a pretty decent day at work. Pretty decent service attitude, pretty good actions all around. Just got to maintain a good perspective and keep God #1. This past year was great so I'm renewing the contract with God. When I keep God first everything else falls in to place.

+ Spiritual practice - good here. Routine meditation and prayer this morning. So nothing special but the cumulative effect is growing.

+ Attitude of service - got some good things done here today. Was helfpul at work. Wasn't stuck in self. Just had a good orientation overall.

+ Mental and emotional states - felt really good after work. More energetic than usual and really felt optimistic. Obviously I want to move in this direction. Generally I've been on the positive side of things for a year. i also want to keep improving and remove barriers to increased connection and well being. 2 months of retention has me with pretty good energy, focus. Just transmutating the sexual energy which I want to continue.

+ Life habits - Strong - even though I didn't wake up with the best energy I put a good foot forward and moved in a positive direction.

Moved forward today.

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May 18

One good thing that happened today was a nice bike ride. It was warm out after work and I went on a nice cruise. Just went around the city a little bit and stopped here and there and rode past some different buildings and things. So a good ride overall.

Grateful for: lots of phone calls with friends, had success with some coding problems, less people wearing masks

Solid day today. A little slow to get out of bed but still a solid day. Work went pretty well and I'm feeling pretty capable at work. Always need to keep an eye out to stay grateful and avoid getting upset or stressed. Likewise I want to avoid being in a rush or postponing happiness until I start a programming job and make more money. I have to be excited about being on the path and what I'm doing right now. Summer is here and there is a lot to be excited about so I can focus on really having a good summer.

+ Spiritual practice - good morning session, I'd always like a little more time. Maybe after work I should start working in chanting instead of winding down and watching videos online. I don't do that for too long, just a little dumb entertainment but it would be better spent chanting.

+ Attitude of service - not stuck in self today, helpful at work, good outward energy, so happy with this

+ Mental and emotional states - generally in a really good spot. On the positive side of things, feeling connected and capable, just a solid day here. Keeping a really clean mental space

+ Life habits - good here. Looking to switch things up a little bit though. Considering a gym membership at work so i can go and work out during lunch even if I have to stay at work later. It would be really time efficient, plus I'd break up the day and really get away during lunch. I think I'd be really strong in the afternoon after a good workout and I'd be able to concentrate and focus. So thinking about this. Also I finished a full year of turning the shower all the way to cold and walking in. I think I'll keep this up but only during the week. Weekends I'm thinking letting myself start the shower with hot water. That way I'm staying more motivated about this. It's like an incentive. Weekends might include cold also, but at least get in with hot water

Moved forward today

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May 19

Something good that happened today was an awesome bike ride... really hot out so went for a nice cruise after work. The river was running high so that was neat to look at and just all around nice out. Was great to be outside on a warm day and just feel that the cold weather is gone and I can bike and be more active.

Grateful for: supervisor isn't upset that i missed a meeting, had fun writing a query today, saw our team at work in person

+ spiritual practice: good effort with morning session but always feel i'd like to do more.

/ attitude of service: mostly good but did get somewhat upset over a project at work. need to be more positive about this. Just have a better orientation and look to serve. Now that I've been at my job that's worn off a bit.

/ mental and emotional states - a little off today, not on the negative side of things but still not where I'd like to be. I want to really be positive. Good job on not falling into negativity, so want to bounce back tomorrow

/ Life habits - didn't get up when my alarm went off and that was a bad start to the day

Moved forward today

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Posted (edited)

May 21

One good thing that happened was I went to an ecstatic dance event. I had felt dull all week and this made me feel energized and connected. Felt really good to dance with a bunch of people. I ended up feeling really open and emotional after which is good. Great way to end the week.

Grateful for: growing up near my grandparents, made it to weekend, talked with coworker some today which was nice,.

+ spiritual practice - good morning session. also made good effort at work to reconnect and keep God at the forefront of my mind

/ attitude of service: a little stuck in my own problems today. didn't have great outward energy, so can improve here

/ mental and emotional states: most of the day felt a little dull and overwhelmed. just felt a little tense here at work and struggled through some of the day

+ Life habits: improvement here. got up when my alarm went off, took a cold shower, got a good study session in. So good things here.

moved forward today

Edited by Jai

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