Beginner Mind

Have you ever truly made a choice?

110 posts in this topic

There's a quote from David DeAngelo that has stuck with me over the years.  He said, "Attraction isn't a choice."  Whether someone feels sexually attracted to someone or not is not a conscious decision they are making.  Attraction happens automatically beyond one's control.

This got me thinking, is anything a choice?  Have we ever truly made a choice in our lifetime?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

yes of course you have made choices. it just depends where the choice was coming from. unconscious feelings, conscious feelings, your mind, your ego, your need to survive and live through or uphold some complex. usually a mixture of everything just mentioned.  

Edited by SunnyNewDay

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

you're conscious now aren't you? you can see, hear, feel emotions, etc. It's never entirely 100% unconscious. It just depends how much is there and what you're able to do from where you're at. it's why we do this work, to regain our ability to make more clear choices consciously based off a purified mind and conscious values. You're the master of your ship if you so choose to take responsibility and turn off the auto pilot, which is a process. 

Edited by SunnyNewDay

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@SunnyNewDay Even now as I feel inclined to disagree with you, I'm conscious of the fact that I am not consciously choosing to disagree with you.  I really have no say in the matter. 

Having said that, I think it's necessary for us to act as if we make choices.

Edited by Beginner Mind

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes you can make a choice. A turning point is always presented in one's life. It's up to you to decide if you want to take that turning point or not. If not, you'll probably be stuck in the same routine and mindset. There will not be a deeper impact in your life and others' life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Key Elements @ajasatya If I am truly capable of making choices, then I should be able to choose to feel attracted to an obese woman.  But I can't do that.  And so it is with everything.  You don't choose to have liberal or conservative leanings.  You don't choose to prefer coffee over tea.  You don't choose to be a spiritual seeker.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Beginner Mind Don't be to simplistic. You can't choose the number of molecules of water that your gut will absorb either. But that doesn't mean that you can't make choices.

You can choose to wake up early and work hard on your life purpose. You can choose to stop eating trash food. You can choose to exercise and practice meditation.

If you're trying to use spiritual jargons to justify petty choices and lack of responsibility, you'll hit a huge wall very soon. It's up to you.


unborn Truth

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Beginner Mind did you choose to graduate from high school? That was your choice.

There is always something inside of you giving you a wise direction. It's up to you to act on it. Yes, of course, this can lead to awakening and enlightenment.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@ajasatya I'm not trying to avoid responsibility.  I'm just not convinced that I truly am responsible.  I don't really feel that I deserve the credit or blame for what has happened in my life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Beginner Mind if you live unconsciously, then your actions will be unconscious and autonomous, even though there is an illusion that you are doing these things. When you live consciously your actions will be your choice and not slave to unconscious behaviors. And after all that there may be an even deeper truth that noone is making these choices, and then another that You were after all. There's no simple way of talking about this, so the answers you get from this question will be all over the place. 

Edited by seeking_brilliance

Check out my lucid dreaming anthology series, Stars of Clay  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At an ultimate level, no, you cannot make a choices. Because there is no individual you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
31 minutes ago, Beginner Mind said:

@ajasatya  I don't really feel that I deserve the credit or blame for what has happened in my life.

You do and you don't.  Live from both perspectives.  Face yourself and the choices you have made, meanwhile relax in the fact that these happenings were unconscious, and completely the natural order of things, and no one is responsible.   


Check out my lucid dreaming anthology series, Stars of Clay  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Beginner Mind You will find that by asking this particular question you will always receive conflicting answers.

Why can’t our ubiquitous experience of making choices of our own free will be aligned with the actual reality of making choices? In my opinion, decision making on a human level is self evident.

However, at this point in time (and possibly for the rest of human civilization) we cannot know whether we actually do control our choices. The question is, can you be okay with not knowing?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
29 minutes ago, Beginner Mind said:

@seeking_brilliance Yes, I think we do need to act as if we make choices.  Accepting responsibility is an empowering thing to do.

Just do what feels natural. Why fight it? If it feels natural to you to act as if we make choices, then do that.  BTW, it's what feels natural to me, too... 

 


Check out my lucid dreaming anthology series, Stars of Clay  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@seeking_brilliance Definitely feels natural for me to act as if I am responsible, but that's probably due to my conditioning from parents, school, etc.  It would be interesting to see what kind of society we would have if people realized that they aren't truly responsible.  There would almost certainly be less shame, guilt, hatred, pride, arrogance, etc.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Beginner Mind Yeah...such a society would be completly foreign and alien to us, but could possibly be the One we are evolving into.  I like your forward thinking.... Such a society we often think of as a utopia, but if we truly examine it, it's like all the fun will be sucked out of life.  It sounds really happy and great, but kind of boring. And it'd be interesting to see how they would think of us. If they even remember us. 


Check out my lucid dreaming anthology series, Stars of Clay  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@seeking_brilliance It might be boring but there would be far less suffering.  There are certainly things in my past that I'm not proud of.  It brings me some peace to contemplate the possibility that I wasn't responsible for those choices.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now