Key Elements

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  1. @Shinyes it is possible, if you stop looking and focusing at the person's gender and get to know him/her for real. The same is true for other things, like "race." The thing to do is stop putting ppl in certain categories and judging/assuming, and listen and allow the person to be authentic.
  2. I'm going to keep this as simple as possible. I chose to learn two languages so that I could express: what does it mean by "we are one." Learning two languages also gave me the opportunity to be more marketable. I became a bilingual teacher. There are also other opportunities: translator, bilingual art, bilingual art teaching, etc. It's very broad and flexible. My LP: to teach non-duality and languages through bilingual art in fun, easy, and simple ways. Hint: try to make your interests broad so that it could include profound things and other opportunities.
  3. Ok, I'm talking about the US. A marriage certificate by itself is not an expression of anyone's love. It's just benefits. You could choose to have those benefits or not. It's your choice. It has nothing to do with an expression of love because by itself it doesn't hold a marriage together. Some ppl still get divorced. Also, it has nothing to do with culture. I see wedding dresses having more to do with culture, but hardly anyone now follows those rules. A wedding dress doesn't even indicate what religion a person is in. Ppl just want to have a nice party with family and friends. It's important not to judge ppl based on how they got married or whether or not they hold a marriage certificate. It doesn't tell you what mindset they have. It tells you nothing about the person.
  4. This goes for any type of relationships, including intimate relationships. To me, he forgot to mention that a person could develop from a root to trunk. That's when a person is very independent, well-rounded, and is capable of solving many types of problems effectively for himself/herself and his/her loved ones, esp in very challenging times.
  5. If you never want that marriage certificate, that's fine. It's your choice. It's a good decision. But, just keep in mind that some ppl are married to each other not just for the sake of getting benefits. They do love each other, and their love runs deep. A marriage certificate isn't the thing that's holding them together. All in all, it's just a piece of paper. They don't fear that. There are always two sides to the same coin. Then, there are those who stay together for years without the certificate, only to breakup in the end for whatever reason. ----- When ppl hear of other ppl loving each other, they only have their own definitions of what that means. And so, ppl are on all sides when it comes to the definition of love, right? Why not? I think this clip explains love the best: It also works for the dating world and also for intimate relationships. Most ppl that you run into will only end up coming and going. If you truly want to find that root, then you got to develop yourself to that level to attract one. And, if you do find that root, then the both of you could develop even further and go from root to trunk. To me, he forgot to mention trunk. A trunk is a non-quitter who is well-rounded and could solve many problems easily. Trunks are extremely rare.
  6. Does "high consciousness" mean only pickup guys and a certain group of ppl? No. Because it's not restricted to a certain group. If it was, it would be far from being nuanced. I do recommend exploring different "groups" and different cultures / countries that are very different from what you know and learn from that first without getting involved. I also think you have to be careful here. How do you define "partner?" How do you define "dating?" Does dating to you involve casual sex? Because if you say yes, different gals feel differently about this. If they don't believe in that, it doesn't necessarily mean they are at stage blue or orange. You cannot judge ppl at what stage they're at just based on a few boundaries / values. Who is this person overall?
  7. You know what, when you say the term "high consciousness," you're talking about something that's not popular to most people in society. Even Leo said this sometimes. For example, what do you think of this clip: I posted this before. Most ppl, in your life, who you will come across, will not stay in your life or even keep in touch. Dating is like that too. They come and they go. All I'm saying is, be careful. If you really want to find a partner, make sure you know yourself, develop yourself, and love yourself first. Then, you'll be able to know who you want to be with.
  8. You know what, if you're even considering marrying someone, you got to really talk about it before it happens. Research. It's no joke. Even if you're a polyamorous, and you're thinking of marrying your primary partner, do you think they don't talk about these things? Of course they do. They do discuss about their other partners and whether or not they're going to swing in their actual relationships. Why would they not? The ppl who do not know themselves or what they want out of their actual relationship or what they want out of life, will not even bother to talk about it. They'll just go with the flow and accept whatever, only to end up leaving because they didn't know better and put the blame on someone else. Have you heard of prenuptial agreement? Some ppl consider that...
  9. It's the Ox's tail. "What you got there is a glimpse of a few hairs of the Ox's tail..." said the Zen master to Leo. I bet you were referring to Shinzen Young.
  10. I see a pointer in this profound relationships clip. At around 2:25, he said, "We want to keep chasing love, but we don't actually want to fall into it." Falling into it refers to falling back into our ego via singularity from the nothingness. Then, there's this intense love. He might have had an awakening or is aware of it.
  11. Hmmm...just had a thought I find interesting. Recently, I made a new friend. He's a guy, and he's single. Yes, he's a good one with a good personality. He told me that he wants to get married one day and have a family. I don't find him "traditional" just because he wants to go down the "monogamy" path. Yeah...he's in his late 30's and still hasn't found a good match. I'm thinking it must be really tough now to find a good one to eventually know and get married to. Yes, he's into non-duality too without the religious bs. I'm sure he will make a loving husband if he finds a gal who matches him.
  12. Yes, because I don't find Jay and his channel to be bigoted toward other groups. If he is, I don't even want to look into it. Leo doesn't talk about polyamory, and I know he's not against that group. If Jay is a polyamorous and he made the same clip, you would probably feel differently about him. Yes. I was living in another country for a year while my husband was in the US -- I had no problem with this. We communicated through social media sometimes. Jay is not saying that social media is wrong; he's saying that most ppl don't do it like this.
  13. @Serotoninluv I want to say something I find important in our discussion. I've already mentioned labels. I find that labeling someone to be "monogamous" for whatever reason to be out of line. I find that this is a huge label nowadays, and it makes the person seem dogmatic and evil. A "monogamous" person who is married, for example, is not chained in handcuffs like a criminal. This person is also capable of going out and sleeping with many and then lie about it to his/her spouse. But, anyway, my point is, there is also the person who chooses not to do this, and there's nothing wrong with this person. He/she doesn't feel the need to do it. I'm not even sure why this particular person is labeled as a "traditional" stage blue type.
  14. @Elton just a little warning. Don't make it too complicated than what it is. The complications make a relationship misguided -- too many fights, too much nonsense talking, misunderstanding/not being clear/and then criticizing because you're not clear of what the other person said and vice versa.