Hardkill

Girls Have Dating Easier?

50 posts in this topic

15 hours ago, Hardkill said:

I've tried every "game" u can think of or know, and each and everyone one of them gave me more bad than good results. The only small rays of hopes I may have are getting an expensive legit coach for dating or finding a PUA lair or an experienced wing guy (which are very hard to find). Even I am not optimistic about either one of those options working for me because I am a freak.

But of course there will be more people that won't date you than people who want to date you. I mean even if you're some kind of celebrity that might have more than average success at dating, there are still more people who don't want to date you than people who want to. I mean what would the world look like if everyone wanted to date just anyone? It would mean that nobody has any standards, and then being in a relationship with someone wouldn't be so "magical" since you know that the other person could just as well have been with that guy walking down the street or that man who's waiting for the train. Wouldn't you like somebody to choose you, because she likes you, the way you are? Then you'd know that even if someone who's more good looking and richer than you passes down the street, she wouldn't leave you for him, because she likes you. Granted, it's hard to find the person who would like exactly the traits that you have. You might like a girl, but her ideal might be completely different from the way you are. Then again, a girl might like you, but she might not be suitable to your criteria at all. Sometimes, you never find somebody who fits all your ideals, and you have to say "alright 5 out of 7 will do, the other 2 are not really that important anyway" and work it out during the relationship.

Any avenue you take, you will not find a high success rate. Suppose you were searching for a job, do you think that you'd be suited for any job that is available out there, or would you be more suited to the jobs that require your specific skill set, to the jobs that are related to the college that you went to?

You say that you have had some good results and some bad results. Build on the lessons that you learned from these. Furthermore, there is something that Leo said, but I can't remember exactly where he said this: it was something like, if you're working in a mine, searching for gold, hoping to get rich, you might fail 10,000 times, but you only need to find gold once, and you're set. Remember, Thomas Edison tried 10,000 light bulb filaments before he got to the right one. But he didn't need to find the right one twice.

One last point: so what if you're a freak? I mean in order for someone to at least find you interesting, you have to be somehow different from everyone else, there has to be a thing that sets yourself apart from the crowd. Do you expect someone to date you just because you're the same as everyone else? Learn to use the thing that sets yourself apart to make yourself "shine".

Be desireless. Be excellent. Be gone.

Edited by NEW11

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@Hardkill

Actually, I think there is something more that I want to say. I should apologize beforehand, but I'm going to be honest.

I haven't read all the posts that you have on this site, but from what I gathered from this topic only, you don't really have a deep understanding of how dating works, you don't understand why you have this problem, you just want a solution, and you want it with the stubbornness that a child might want a toy, crying out to his parents to buy him that toy. Nobody wants to even be a bystander in the store while that child is screaming at his parents. So go do the work, understand human and female psychology and much more important start to understand your desires and eliminate them. I mean "I really want a hot girlfriend". Why? Why is this so important? So that you can pride yourself with your girlfriend? Isn't this shallow? And are you really that hot too? (I'm sure that you wouldn't be having this problem if you were, or maybe you are, but that's not your biggest problem) Do you work out? If you do not, then why are you demanding for the girl to be in some way that you are not? Wouldn't I be a hypocrite if I'd demand from my girlfriend to read at least 50 books/year, while at the same time, I'm barely reading 5? Your biggest problem is needing a solution and never asking "why have I got this problem?". You desire a girlfriend so much, that you forget to work on yourself and instead you focus on petty topics like "girls have dating easier" - like that's going to help.

I'm not saying that if you find a girl that you fall in love with, and she's hot, you should run away, but that aspect shouldn't matter to you. If she gets sick and the disease somehow transforms her body into something that isn't pleasing to your eye, that shouldn't matter to you. Or are you going to leave her?

All your desires should be eliminated. You should learn to be happy with or without a girlfriend, you should learn to create abundance for yourself. Otherwise you're just like a beggar telling Bill Gates to take him as a business partner. Start by watching "The Tao of Steve", a simple movie, a funny movie and move up to reading books and do the work. I know that you can get by not doing the work. Yes, you can have a girlfriend while not doing this work. But is that really how you want to live your life? Do you want to leave everything up to chance? Do you want to have an awesome relationship or just any kind of relationship? Do you not know, that without this work there will be a lot of unneeded suffering involved in your life and future relationships?

Maybe the best advice anyone could give you right now is: assume that you will never get a girlfriend, unless you learn to let go of your desire to have one.

Finally, if you don't want to do this work, then why are you posting on a self-development forum? Isn't that why we're here? You have to take on the challenge. If you'll always run away from it, then don't be surprised that its solution will also run away from you. No matter how many avenues you try, you'll always have this problem if you don't work on yourself.

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7 hours ago, NEW11 said:

@Hardkill

Actually, I think there is something more that I want to say. I should apologize beforehand, but I'm going to be honest.

I haven't read all the posts that you have on this site, but from what I gathered from this topic only, you don't really have a deep understanding of how dating works, you don't understand why you have this problem, you just want a solution, and you want it with the stubbornness that a child might want a toy, crying out to his parents to buy him that toy. Nobody wants to even be a bystander in the store while that child is screaming at his parents. So go do the work, understand human and female psychology and much more important start to understand your desires and eliminate them. I mean "I really want a hot girlfriend". Why? Why is this so important? So that you can pride yourself with your girlfriend? Isn't this shallow? And are you really that hot too? (I'm sure that you wouldn't be having this problem if you were, or maybe you are, but that's not your biggest problem) Do you work out? If you do not, then why are you demanding for the girl to be in some way that you are not? Wouldn't I be a hypocrite if I'd demand from my girlfriend to read at least 50 books/year, while at the same time, I'm barely reading 5? Your biggest problem is needing a solution and never asking "why have I got this problem?". You desire a girlfriend so much, that you forget to work on yourself and instead you focus on petty topics like "girls have dating easier" - like that's going to help.

I'm not saying that if you find a girl that you fall in love with, and she's hot, you should run away, but that aspect shouldn't matter to you. If she gets sick and the disease somehow transforms her body into something that isn't pleasing to your eye, that shouldn't matter to you. Or are you going to leave her?

All your desires should be eliminated. You should learn to be happy with or without a girlfriend, you should learn to create abundance for yourself. Otherwise you're just like a beggar telling Bill Gates to take him as a business partner. Start by watching "The Tao of Steve", a simple movie, a funny movie and move up to reading books and do the work. I know that you can get by not doing the work. Yes, you can have a girlfriend while not doing this work. But is that really how you want to live your life? Do you want to leave everything up to chance? Do you want to have an awesome relationship or just any kind of relationship? Do you not know, that without this work there will be a lot of unneeded suffering involved in your life and future relationships?

Maybe the best advice anyone could give you right now is: assume that you will never get a girlfriend, unless you learn to let go of your desire to have one.

Finally, if you don't want to do this work, then why are you posting on a self-development forum? Isn't that why we're here? You have to take on the challenge. If you'll always run away from it, then don't be surprised that its solution will also run away from you. No matter how many avenues you try, you'll always have this problem if you don't work on yourself.

I don't like to always brag, but as a matter of fact, I always been extremely good looking ever since I was a baby. In fact, I would say that as I get older my looks keep improving because I keep sculpting my physique from being extremely physically active for several years. Unfortunately, I am only of average height and so it has been too difficult to break into the modeling career. Though, I have been working on becoming a fitness model (hopefully I'll make it one day). I'll PM you my instagram so you can see what I look like.

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@Hardkill Can I see you too? ^_^

Girly interest)

Edited by Azote

Apply consciousness to the burned area

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1 hour ago, Hardkill said:

I don't like to always brag, but as a matter of fact, I always been extremely good looking ever since I was a baby. In fact, I would say that as I get older my looks keep improving because I keep sculpting my physique from being extremely physically active for several years. Unfortunately, I am only of average height and so it has been too difficult to break into the modeling career. Though, I have been working on becoming a fitness model (hopefully I'll make it one day). I'll PM you my instagram so you can see what I look like.

Good, then fix your other problems. I hope that's not all what you made of what I said. I mean that was not even the main point. If that's all you focused on, then you missed 95% of my point.

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@Leo Gura The Rape, period/pill, needs to sacrifice to raise child and having to deal with crazy emotional fluctuations are spot on.

HOWEVER, 75 percent of divorces are filed by women so it is the men who get dumped and the women who do the dumping. Men get dumped for better men just like women get dumped so it is a problem for both genders not just for women. Men also get abused by women, maybe not physically but emotionally and verbally. You have said you had girls not return your texts after having sex with them so you probably got pumped and dumped too. This idea that men just use women for sex and dump them for hotter girls is very one sided. Dumping, cheating etc happens by both genders. Women are just as hypergamous as men (some claim even more) so this is not a women related issue.

Also as a men you have to struggle with being strong and masculine which can be very difficult. Having to deal with charisma, strength, confidence etc is  LOT harder than to put on some make up and to watch what you eat. 

Edited by ColeMC01

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On 2017-11-13 at 3:27 AM, Hardkill said:

Guys, I can't help, but feel like girls or women have always had dating much easier than guys do. They don't have to do nearly as many approaches to find a guy, let alone find and keep the kind of guy they want. They also can get laid anytime they want. Yes they can get pregnant, but guys also have to be worried about that too due to the child support laws, regardless of whether or not he is in a relationship with her to any degree. Furthermore, they generally have a higher social IQ than men do so they can learn much quicker than guys can regarding dating and relationships. Don't even get me started with hot girls because they know that they have to put in very little to no work in getting the best guys they want. Even the hottest girls, who are too intimidating to be approached by the vast majority of guys, can get easily connected to the highest status and/or coolest guys.

Being good looking as a guy doesn't do much for your odds at being successful with dating, sex, and romance, even if you are extraordinarily handsome and well-built (like myself, not to brag) because the vast majority of women aren't nearly as visual as men are. 

If a guy wants to score the best quality and hottest women then he either has to be very lucky or naturally gifted at it or a well-known hero or work very hard at improving his social/seduction skills tremendously. Men with asperger's syndrome and/or major anxiety issues especially have to work incredibly hard to the bone and go through an incomprehensible amount of torture and suffering to improve his perceived status and/or his charisma to the point of transforming into a whole other person whose level of social skills are the complete opposite of what they were when he was an aspie (assuming that's even possible for such a social loser to achieve).

Also, women don't get rejected nearly as much as men do.

So, what do you ladies and gents say about all of this?

This is the harsh reality of guys.

This fact doesn't change even if you would "stop complaining and start working on yourself" like girls and succesful guys always say you should do.

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On 11/12/2017 at 8:27 PM, Hardkill said:

Guys, I can't help, but feel like girls or women have always had dating much easier than guys do. They don't have to do nearly as many approaches to find a guy, let alone find and keep the kind of guy they want. They also can get laid anytime they want. Yes they can get pregnant, but guys also have to be worried about that too due to the child support laws, regardless of whether or not he is in a relationship with her to any degree. Furthermore, they generally have a higher social IQ than men do so they can learn much quicker than guys can regarding dating and relationships. Don't even get me started with hot girls because they know that they have to put in very little to no work in getting the best guys they want. Even the hottest girls, who are too intimidating to be approached by the vast majority of guys, can get easily connected to the highest status and/or coolest guys.

Being good looking as a guy doesn't do much for your odds at being successful with dating, sex, and romance, even if you are extraordinarily handsome and well-built (like myself, not to brag) because the vast majority of women aren't nearly as visual as men are. 

If a guy wants to score the best quality and hottest women then he either has to be very lucky or naturally gifted at it or a well-known hero or work very hard at improving his social/seduction skills tremendously. Men with asperger's syndrome and/or major anxiety issues especially have to work incredibly hard to the bone and go through an incomprehensible amount of torture and suffering to improve his perceived status and/or his charisma to the point of transforming into a whole other person whose level of social skills are the complete opposite of what they were when he was an aspie (assuming that's even possible for such a social loser to achieve).

Also, women don't get rejected nearly as much as men do.

So, what do you ladies and gents say about all of this?

 

I will have to say that I agree with what you are saying.

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If I keep seeing you guys spreading these victim narratives I'm gonna start banning you. This is a self-improvement forum, not an Incel forum.

Man the fuck up and roll up your sleeves or you'll be kicked out. I want to see evidence of you taking action rather than just keyboard-jockeying.

@Blackhawk Lookin at you, boy.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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