Men: How do you feel & react when you see women cry?

[Joseph Maynor]

Using the word stalking should be used carefully.  This has a sexual connotation that is implied.  

[Emerald]

15 hours ago, Jirh said:

How would you rate their IQ and EQ?

The two types you mentioned earlier typically rate high EQ for type #1 and high IQ for type #2. But I'm curious about those who react negatively.

It depends from person to person.

Almost always, the guys with high EQ tend to also have a high IQ. That's because high EQ requires a strong intellectual capacity for reflecting on feelings. 

In fact, I don't know if I've ever met a person who has a high EQ who wasn't also very intelligent.

But the guys who have lower EQ can have a wide variety of intelligence ranges.

I've met really smart guys who have a hard time being with feelings, who stay in their head. I have a good friend like this. He's a great thinker, but tends to default to thinking mode. 

And I've met average intelligence guys who also stay up in their own mind or who fear emotions. 

[MuadDib]

Elated to witness her experiencing the sublime.

[LordFall]

3 hours ago, Lyubov said:

I don't disagree that I'm a bit dismissive and give off your typical uncle vibe but I personally don't expect perfection from myself in this domain especially with all the women I've been with and shit I've been through. Women are annoying and the hotter they are the crazier they get. Many guys will go in with an idealistic mindset, however when the rubber meets the road... man you change your tune. Developing your own healthy boundaries, being a strong un-reactive pillar, and restoring your own energy is waaayyyyy more important than ever trying to solve a bitch's problems. 

 

I respect your openness, and honestly, almost every man who's had a lot of dating experience goes through that numb phase just to survive the circus of dating.. The trap is getting stuck in cynicism and ending up jaded. The more experience I get in my dating business, the more I realize a lot of this is due to not setting strong boundaries early on in your relationships and it leads to women baby stepping their way past them and the man resenting the woman and himself for it. 

I think there's no shame in taking a break from dating to go back to your centre and as a matter of fact I've done it myself a few times. Once that's done one can go back to the dating market from a position of self-awareness and power as opposed to being needy for approval and companionship. 

[Judy2]

6 hours ago, Jirh said:

I think this is very important and tricky at the same time. It's always like this with emotions.

And this is true on the personal level too. On the one hand, you want to listen to your emotions. You don't want to shut yourself off to that authentic side of yours. Yet, on the other hand, you don't want to let your emotions dictate your life and decisions, because they often fall short compared to logic.

And I think it's not as simple as deciding whether it's serious or silly. It's serious enough for the child to cry about it. But most parents don't have emotional maturity to know how to handle their own emotions properly, let alone their children. They operate mostly from dogmatic beliefs and autopilot and dysfunctional upbringing.

Ego factors in this too, and it can blind the caretakers for example. Maybe they just don't want to admit being wrong. Maybe they care about their self image more than they care about their child. I've seen real life applications of those examples. And there's definitely worse.

Striking the right balance is the hardest thing, and it's what emotional maturity is all about.

That maturity would then propagate to others automatically as we interface with their emotional systems and struggles.

Yes.

Not ignoring someone doesn't mean you have to agree with them. You can take the emotion seriously and still tell them "no more ice cream today" or "please give that toy back to your friend".

[Judy2]

6 hours ago, Lyubov said:

Women are not children. In general I don't care for this comparison when it comes up in this forum which it has before. No, women and children are not similar in temperament.

yes, i am glad you see it that way.

i explored the example of childhood emotional development in response to something Leo said. 

12 hours ago, Judy2 said:

(...)

Of course, there are differences between children and adults. That is why i chose not to bring this up as an example. I thought it was obvious that there are good reasons to be sympathetic with children.

 

children are still people, though. some key aspects of dealing with children's emotions are the same for dealing with adults (male or female) while others are not (since kids are still developing and dependent on their caregivers for survival).

Edited 48 minutes ago by Judy2

[Leo Gura]

Humans are children.