Does body count matter for you?

[Inliytened1]

4 minutes ago, something_else said:

A common trope of women in open relationships is that they’re open because their guy pressured them into it. What usually then happens is the guy finds like zero or maybe a few other partners, while the woman is inundated with offers and quite rightly feels free to explore them. It does not end well.

One girl I hooked up with who was in an open relationship was talking about the Netflix shows she was going to go home and watch with her BF after she left my place. She also told me about the 3 other guys she’d slept with that week when I was asking her how the open relationship was going. She said the BF had gotten essentially zero attention despite pressuring her into the open relationship in the first place. It was very clear that opening the relationship up ruined it. He was jealous and she lost a lot of respect for him. 

Yea, if you want to experience this kind of dynamic the best way is a long term relationship where you both agree to explore group dynamics together. I think that has the potential to be much more stable. The moment you have partners sleeping with lots of other people outside of the relationship it’s going to create a mess eventually.

It just doesn't work.  The woman can't give herself to you.  Because she is always worried that you are fucking other women.  There is no trust.  Relationsihps are built on trust.  Trust me i know this. no pun intended.

Edited 6 hours ago by Inliytened1

[LordFall]

34 minutes ago, something_else said:

I’ve been with girls in open relationships, and I’ve played the game where I’m seeing lots of girls at once who vaguely know about each other but claim not to care. In the end, somebody always gets hurt. I’ve had threesomes in that setup too, and almost every time it created divides, even if all of us enjoyed it at the time.

Looking back, it caused a lot of suffering and chaos that was convenient for me to ignore because I was getting lots of fun sex. If a woman really likes you, she’ll often tolerate a lot and say she’s fine with things she isn’t actually fine with deep down.

So there’s no real blocker to me living that lifestyle. My experience is just that doing it ethically long term is incredibly hard, bordering on impossible. It’s a fundamentally unstable setup.

It’s hard enough to maintain one romantic relationship long term without someone getting hurt, let alone a whole web of them. For short-term stuff where everyone knows what it is, it can be great fun. But sooner or later, and with enough short term pursuits, someone catches feelings, gets attached, jealousy builds, and people get hurt.

Interesting, thanks for sharing. Were these women into polyamory or were these girls that you picked up through game?

Also how did this open relationship progress, how long did it last and why did you guys break up? 

I think open relationships make the relationship 3x more intense and there a lot of dynamics involved. A common trap I hear is after opening up the woman has a lot of the options and the man struggles to get laid, resents his partner and eventually tries to close the relationship and the woman now resents him for limiting her freedom and it falls apart. 

Edited 6 hours ago by LordFall

[Inliytened1]

4 minutes ago, LordFall said:

Interesting, thanks for sharing. Were these women into polyamory or were these girls that you picked up through game?

Also how did this open relationship progress, how long did it last and why did you guys break up? 

Alright so what has been your success with swinging ?  because essentially that is what it is.  I did find one woman that was a swinger and you know what? I fucked her in front of her husband while he drove us to the bar.  But that was only one.  I was swinging with her for a few months but it just seemed emtpty.  Do you want that?

Edited 6 hours ago by Inliytened1

[LordFall]

Just now, Inliytened1 said:

alright so what has been you success with swinging ?  because essentially that is what it is.  I did find one woman that was a swinger and you know hat? I fucked her in front of her husband while he drove us to the bar.  But that was only one.  I was swinging with her for  few months but it just seemed emtpty.  Do you want that?

Swinging sounds like the polyamory equivalent of one night stands. No it's not for me. I rather do polyamory as a polycule in a hierarchal polyamory type of setup where I invest into different partners depending on their levels in me and how aligned their life are. I host a lot of creative events and what I've started doing last year is small concerts so for example I'm sure I will get some more fickle FWBs that I invite to fun events like this and then have a more consistent partner that is intertwined in my business and finances. 

A lot of people are a fan of parallel polyamory where your partner never meet and you just date multiple without intertwining lives, I can understand why that is appealing as you avoid the friction of group dynamics. That doesn't really appeal to me though I want 2-3 girlfriends that are also bi and date eachother. 

[Inliytened1]

Just now, LordFall said:

Swinging sounds like the polyamory equivalent of one night stands. No it's not for me. I rather do polyamory as a polycule in a hierarchal polyamory type of setup where I invest into different partners depending on their levels in me and how aligned their life are. I host a lot of creative events and what I've started doing last year is small concerts so for example I'm sure I will get some more fickle FWBs that I invite to fun events like this and then have a more consistent partner that is intertwined in my business and finances. 

A lot of people are a fan of parallel polyamory where your partner never meet and you just date multiple without intertwining lives, I can understand why that is appealing as you avoid the friction of group dynamics. That doesn't really appeal to me though I want 2-3 girlfriends that are also bi and date eachother. 

well shit sign me up.  I aint too old. 

[LordFall]

2 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

well shit sign me up.  I aint too old. 

Are you on dating apps? Feeld has a lot of women into alternative lifestyles. 

Edited 6 hours ago by LordFall

[Inliytened1]

1 minute ago, LordFall said:

Are you on dating apps? Feeld has a lot of women into alternative lifestyle. 

So, recently single.  Haven't signed back up just yet. Might have a chick of old coming over to bang me tonight.  That's my plan for the present at least.  But i have to get myself going or signed up somewhere.  I'm old.  But i do good on sites because of my looks.

[LordFall]

Sorry to hear. Good of you to already have someone else though.

I would get on Feeld, I get an ungodly amount of matches on there. Way more than Tinder.

 

Edited 6 hours ago by LordFall

[Valach]

37 minutes ago, Ulax said:

Partly because often you guys prod and poke him all the time with personal attacks because you dislike his views, and then whinge and complain when he engages in more overt personal attacks back at you.

His "views" are heavily misogynistic.

[Inliytened1]

Just now, LordFall said:

Sorry to hear. Good of you to already have someone else though. I would get on Feeld, I get an ungodly amount of matches on there. Way more than Tinder.

 

Thanks.  Yeah it sucks.  But I gotta bring myself back.  Yeah that sounds good and the alternative lifestyle sounds really enticing, like I said.  

[LordFall]

2 minutes ago, Valach said:

His "views" are heavily misogynistic.

In what way? I think you're just shallow in your views man. He is not the best at expressing himself but what he says is not insane. He never said he wants to mislead women, he just said he wants a relationship on his terms in a way where he is a dominant man leading a woman that appreciates him. 

[Valach]

Just now, LordFall said:

In what way? I think you're just shallow in your views man. He is not the best at expressing himself but what he says is not insane. He never said he wants to mislead women, he just said he wants a relationship on his terms in a way where he is a dominant man leading a woman that appreciates him. 

Like 5 instances of his messages just in this very post.

[LordFall]

Just now, Valach said:

Like 5 instances of his messages just in this very post.

Wow you're very precise here and really encouraging high quality conversation. 

[Valach]

Just now, LordFall said:

Wow you're very precise here and really encouraging high quality conversation. 

Okay, the very first comment he made here. Like I do not know what to tell you. This dude gets warning for the way he speaks to woman every second time he contributes, yet you find my views shallow for thinking he is misogynistic?

[Inliytened1]

1 minute ago, Valach said:

Okay, the very first comment he made here. Like I do not know what to tell you. This dude gets warning for the way he speaks to woman every second time he contributes, yet you find my views shallow for thinking he is misogynistic?

who you talking about?

[Valach]

Just now, Inliytened1 said:

who you talking about?

Author of the post, not you.

[Inliytened1]

2 minutes ago, Valach said:

Author of the post, not you.

I know it wasn't me just confirming.  We'll watch him.  Wanna make sure he's not a dick to women.

Edited 5 hours ago by Inliytened1

[Inliytened1]

15 minutes ago, LordFall said:

In what way? I think you're just shallow in your views man. He is not the best at expressing himself but what he says is not insane. He never said he wants to mislead women, he just said he wants a relationship on his terms in a way where he is a dominant man leading a woman that appreciates him. 

just because you are OK with open relationships take a closer look at his views.  Because everyone complaining about him must mean something.  So, as a mod I'll keep an eye out.  I've just recently spent more time over in this section.

[Natasha Tori Maru]

I'm aghast and utterly confused regarding this discussion.

I don't think anyone is really comprehending what @Xonas Pitfall & @Valach are raising.

I almost verge on recommending some sort of professional therapy or help for some of the members here regarding unconscious limiting views. I know this is for deaf ears. I can hope for healing though.

Dehumanisation.

Edited 5 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[Inliytened1]

5 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

I'm aghast and utterly confused regarding this discussion.

I don't think anyone is really comprehending what @Xonas Pitfall & @Valach are raising.

I almost verge on recommending some sort of professional therapy or help for some of the members here regarding unconscious limiting views. I know this is for deaf ears. I can hope for healing though.

Dehumanisation.

We got this on lock down