you can't change your inner game without action

[Olaf]

I don't think you can change inner game, unless you are doing infield approaches. Here me out. JUST working on your beliefs, what you think about yourself, how attractive you are etc. It feels like a lie. It is like you are trying to earn the confidence without taking the action to get that confidence. Yet if you take action, naturally you start to feel more attractive. Whether it is true or not, when I am in flow state, I see a girl, I look her in the eyes and my mind goes "she wants me" and I am 100% believing that thought.

This might sound super narcissistic, but these confident thoughts just come up naturally when you are taking action. There is no way you can ONLY do inner game, look a girl in the eyes and think authentically that she wants you or that you are attractive, in fact it would be covering up your own authentic thoughts that tell you, you are unattractive and not confident. Maybe listen to the thoughts, take action to become more confident. And then naturally you will have good inner game. 

I think it isn't bad to think you are unattractive. If you aren't in flow state, I can feel like that too, but in flow state, you naturally start to think you are him. You naturally start to assume girls are into you, like authentically, I don't create a thought in my mind that she wants me, it is like I feel that she wants me. And who says I am making it up? lol. 

And btw, I don't think it is about having balls of steel, just saying "hi" to people could be an okay start, then maybe ask for directions and eventually approach, it doesn't have to be this cliff-feeling moment where you are going for the hardest approach straight away, in fact it probably could backfire on your confidence having that approach. Just like going in the sea, you do it step by step, slowly adjusting. 

One more note: I do come from a background of spirituality and doing basic inner work already, so if you are highly traumatised or have some mental issues, like this wouldn't be enough of course! You would need medication, a therapist or psychiatric help etc. And only after that, take action, hope you get the point. 

Edited 3 hours ago by Olaf

[Raze]

You can actually but just not with self lies or affirmation which you seem to be alluding to.

[Ulax]

Yes.

'Inner game is the answer' has got to be the biggest load of bs i've ever heard.