I broke up

[Asia P]

My ex boyfriend treated me like a princess but i left him because he smoked cigarettes, drink a lot of alcohool and snort cocaine sometimes (sth like once a moth) i think that who can’t respect his body cant respect others in ultimate. 
there was a feeling of real love and admiration between us but i started feeling unsafe and paranoid. 
am i crazy and i like to destroy relationships? Or maybe there is something reasonable in what i ve wrote.

[Hojo]

If you still thinking about it you dont know.

People dont choose to smoke there is no doer. Gods doing everything.

Edited 4 hours ago by Hojo

[LordFall]

Why did you feel unsafe and paranoid? That seems more concerning than substance use although that can be problematic as well. Also how did he address it when you brought that up to him? If your partner respects you then you should be able to have difficult conversations without toxicity emerging. If he started to get angry at you or to gaslight you around these subjects then that's undoubtedly toxic behaviour. Comparing that to hearing you out and then working on the issues and perhaps having an occasional slip up here and there are two very different situations. 

[Hojo]

What will happen is the woman will guilt the man in what hes doing when God is doing everything. The man will have to pretend that hes in control and try to hide it but it will come up. If you dont wanna be with a smoker thats up to you but to get paranoid about it is kinda weird. 

If you dont want to be with a smoker its fine, to be with a smoker and not like it and judge his actions everytime he does it is devilry. Cause this will cause him to do devilry, to fight with himself over something he dosent want to do. Its like if your mother shames you over porn you just do it more.

Edited 4 hours ago by Hojo

[LordFall]

6 minutes ago, Hojo said:

If you still thinking about it you dont know.

People dont choose to smoke there is no doer. Gods doing everything.

What a weird coping mindset. You have the power to change your habits if you so desire. If you don't want to then that's a whole different story and you can fall into gaslighting like you just did there to justify it. 

[Hojo]

@LordFall You have no power to change a habit you dont want to change. You have no power to want to change. Its made up fiction. You had no free will to start and non to stop. Free will dosent exist.

All that can be done is someone gaslight the observer into hating God.

Change something about you that you like right now cause its bad.

Brain dont work that way champ.

Edited 4 hours ago by Hojo

[LordFall]

Just now, Hojo said:

@LordFall You have no power to change a habit you dont want to change. You have no power to want to change. Its made up fiction.

Stop drinking the kool-aid and touch some grass buddy, you're describing insanity. Worse then that you're using it to justify toxic behaviour and trying to paint some beautiful picture about how it's all god's doing. Which is gaslighting. 

What you're describing is about the existence of squirrel. Give yourself some credit in that you have more agency than a squirrel. 

[Raze]

If your standards is no substance abuse, then no.

[Jirh]

@Asia P By the brief description you gave, you dodged a missile.

Don't look back. He's as low quality as a guy can be.

[Majed]

@LordFall Lmao i agree Hojo is weird.

[Hojo]

@LordFall How is that gaslighting? Inside you and a squirrel is the same thing.

Stop having sex with woman. Thats gaslighting yourself. When there is desirable woman coming at you say no next time. 

There is no difference between wanting to have sex with a woman or having sex and smoking.

Edited 4 hours ago by Hojo

[Asia P]

@Raze seeing him always using made me feel always sad. Real pain each time he lit a cigarette

[Majed]

@Asia P Cigarettes are fine, the issue is his abuse of alcohol and use of cocaine lmao, that's the real issue. 

[Majed]

@Hojo

3 minutes ago, Hojo said:

There is no difference between wanting to have sex with a woman and smoking.

Hojo should be banned. Wtf is this crap ? Lmao. 

[Hojo]

@LordFall If you see and understould God you will understand you arent in control of anything that is happening in the field of light(You arent even there). God wrote the script and pressed play. All the observer can do is argue with it or flow.

Edited 3 hours ago by Hojo

[LordFall]

5 minutes ago, Hojo said:

@LordFall How is that gaslighting? There is nothing in my that is different from a squirrel.

Stop having sex with woman. Thats gaslighting yourself. When there is desirable woman coming at you say no next time. 

Yes you do you have many parts of your brain like the neocortex and the prefrontal cortex which allows you to make conscious decisions and not react to stimuli solely based on impulse. 

You are gaslighting because you are switching the villain and the victim. Now someone that advocates for their partner to stop doing damaging substance is just "going against god" and doesn't understand free will. That's not how the concept of free will works so you're not the one that's being talked about in this thread but I assume you do this in real life as well to avoid responsibility for unproductive behaviour. 

1 minute ago, Hojo said:

@LordFall If you see and understould God you will understand you arent in control of anything that is happening in the field of light. God wrote the script and pressed play. All the observer can do is argue with it.

That's fine if you're satisfied with using that justification to cope with the problems in your life I can't change your life. I can change mine and tell others that what you're saying is toxic and gaslighting and victim mindset fundamentally. 

Edited 3 hours ago by LordFall

[Hojo]

@LordFall You are the one making me the victim. If I smoke and like it you come to me and say its bad. I say I have no free will. Who made the victim there? You did moron. I never said it was bad I said go for it. I love God I dont do anything God is doing everything via intelligence. You are demonizing it making the smoker a victim as if there is something to victimize.

Edited 3 hours ago by Hojo

[Majed]

@LordFall Imagine snorting coke then rationalizing it telling yourself it's not your fault but God's design. Lmao. This shit can't be more ridiculous.

[LordFall]

Just now, Hojo said:

@LordFall You are the one making me the victim. If I smoke and like it you come to me and say its bad. I say I have no free will. Who made the victim there? You did moron. I never said it was bad I said go for it.

You said questioning bad behaviour goes against the will of God and that you are fundamentally powerless to change your bad habits. Which is victim thinking combined with insanity imo.

@Asia P That "real pain" and sadness you felt wasn't you being crazy or destroying your relationship, it was your intuition screaming at you that you were in an unstable environment. Heavy binging and cocaine use inherently create volatility, unpredictable mood shifts, and danger, no matter how much someone "treats you like a princess" when they're sober. You had the self-respect to choose a stable, healthy future over a toxic present. You dodged a bullet. Don't second guess yourself on this one IMO. 

[Hojo]

@LordFall Theres no such thing as bad. You saying bad makes a victim and demonizes God. You are the gaslighter.

If you deemed smoking 'good' there wouldnt be a victim. You are insane and dont know it.

You are trying to turn me into a victim.

Edited 3 hours ago by Hojo