Need motivation to quit bad habits

[Sugarcoat]

I am addicted to music and social media and sometimes food

I know it’s super common, and some wouldn’t even consider it a problem but rather just the modern lifestyle. But for me it’s not that I wanna get to a point where I never do those things ever. It’s just I don’t wanna be addicted to them and feel the need to do them to excessive degree

I realize that every moment I indulge in an addiction, I have the choice to step in, take control and stop

What I think is important from my own experience is having strong enough desire to stop for it to overpower the urge

And that I feel I lack sometimes.

When I was younger, there was certain things that bothered me a ton. So I was driven by a strong desire to change them and I managed to do that.

When you have strong desire to change something, and that desire is ever present and it doesn’t just pop up occasionally like “4 am motivation” . Then it’s much easier to change because it’s like a powerful driving force

I have a vision in my mind of how my mental state would improve further from unhooking myself from these addictions. But I feel the vision is sometimes not compelling enough to motivate me. 

When you stop an addiction, what you meet is this “urge”. And it seems it takes time for the urge to go away, so you gotta hold on to receive the benefit, and sometimes when the desire isn’t strong enough I’m just like “fuck it” and give in and get pulled back into the same habit

I’m not gonna limit myself tho and I think I need super strong desire to change something. Something like simple mindfulness could work too. It is in a way as simple as just not doing something. But when something feels like a force it might feel like you need a counter force to overpower it…

Could someone share the genuine benefits they have received from ending addictions like this? Maybe it could inspire me

[UnbornTao]

What do you mean by addicted to music and food? 🥝 🥑 Is it functional? 

[Sugarcoat]

8 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

What do you mean by addicted to music and food? 🥝 🥑 Is it functional? 

I am able to stick to my diet plan significant amount of time. But sometimes I overeat on weekends, on sweets for example, and sometimes I find myself going back and forth to the fridge and snacking 

Regarding music. It gives me significant dopamine. So almost immediately upon waking I crave it. And I find myself listening when I’m on my way somewhere. When I’m getting ready for bed. Sometimes I’ll procrastinate studying and instead vibe to music

So basically it is a problem to a certain degree. It’s not super major. But I feel I wanna get to point where there isn’t such a frequent urge to indulge . By addiction I mean I feel a very frequent urge and it can feel hard to stop 

Edited 16 hours ago by Sugarcoat

[Schizophonia]

If you developed a habit at an early age of being inhibited because you didn't feel good enough (especially during the Oedipus complex), you'll tend to be dysthymic and listen to a lot of music to daydream; usually daydreams about power.

That said, you have to look on the bright side; it's great to be addicted to this when there are others addicted to drugs, gambling, etc.

The benefit of getting rid of music and repetitive behaviors like watching Sophia Rain videos and her big breasts is better concentration; It's also easier to work.

Edited 16 hours ago by Schizophonia

[Sugarcoat]

@Schizophonia I agree I think daydreaming and using music to support it, is partially caused by an unstable or lacking sense of self irl and that you’re not expressing yourself how you want and are insecure. So it’s important to work on those things 

I will try and see what benefits unhooking myself gives me

 

[Schizophonia]

17 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

@Schizophonia I agree I think daydreaming and using music to support it, is partially caused by an unstable or lacking sense of self irl and that you’re not expressing yourself how you want and are insecure. So it’s important to work on those things 

I will try and see what benefits unhooking myself gives me

 

👍 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

Hmm there is a big difference between a bad habit and an addiction. 

Are these addictions or just 'unthinking indulgences? '

When I quit all substances (weed, drinking, drugs) and junk food, my personal mantra was: 

The feeling and desire passes, whether I act on it or not.

The act of indulging or not was irrelevant to the abating of the craving. It always naturally ended like everything. This really helped me!

[Sugarcoat]

1 minute ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Hmm there is a big difference between a bad habit and an addiction. 

Are these addictions or just 'unthinking indulgences? '

When I quit all substances (weed, drinking, drugs) and junk food, my personal mantra was: 

The feeling and desire passes, whether I act on it or not.

The act of indulging or not was irrelevant to the abating of the craving. It always naturally ended like everything. This really helped me!

Ok I notice we occasionally use words without knowing the proper definition. I googled addiction and it sounds more severe than I have. So I could perhaps say I am mildly addicted . 
 

“Unthinking indulgences “ is good description, because it’s like you’re acting from impulse 

Acting from impulse is in a way one of the nicest feelings, because it feels effortless and natural. It’s just sometimes our impulses drive us to do things that might interfere with obligations and can feel like our mind is all over because we’re so stimulated

So id like to get to a point where my impulses feel more balanced

Yes it’s a good mindset. Even if it takes some time the craving will probably pass

[UnbornTao]

5 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

I am able to stick to my diet plan significant amount of time. But sometimes I overeat on weekends, on sweets for example, and sometimes I find myself going back and forth to the fridge and snacking 

Regarding music. It gives me significant dopamine. So almost immediately upon waking I crave it. And I find myself listening when I’m on my way somewhere. When I’m getting ready for bed. Sometimes I’ll procrastinate studying and instead vibe to music

So basically it is a problem to a certain degree. It’s not super major. But I feel I wanna get to point where there isn’t such a frequent urge to indulge . By addiction I mean I feel a very frequent urge and it can feel hard to stop 

With food, you're obviously always going to feel a frequent urge to eat. So why establish an antagonistic attitude toward that impulse?

Occasionally practicing controlled fasting for half a day, or trying time-restricted eating, might help you manage your eating habits. I don't see a problem with eating sweets or snacking in moderation, like on weekends; it doesn't sound like a major issue, as you said. Perhaps the real issue is feeling guilt from pleasure, thinking that you aren't worthy, or something along those lines.

As for music, again, what's the problem? You could limit it to certain hours, but I see it as mostly beneficial. It's generally not considered an addiction or harmful habit unless it starts interfering with your daily life.

[Sugarcoat]

7 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

With food, you're obviously always going to feel a frequent urge to eat. So why establish an antagonistic attitude toward that impulse?

I’m not always sure where that urge comes from. It’s hard to identify sometimes if it’s real hunger or simply boredom and a desire for quick pleasure. 

In the latter case, I don’t expect those urges to dissapear completely, because nowadays food is tasty and the brain knows, so it’s maybe unrealistic to expect to not crave it even if you’re relatively full. I just wanna stick to eating my plan irregardless of them

7 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

 

Occasionally practicing controlled fasting for half a day, or trying time-restricted eating, might help you manage your eating habits. I don't see a problem with eating sweets or snacking in moderation, like on weekends; it doesn't sound like a major issue, as you said. Perhaps the real issue is feeling guilt from pleasure, thinking that you aren't worthy, or something along those lines.

 

Yes I will try that.

I don’t think it’s a problem to eat sweets occasionally either, it’s just sometimes I overeat on them.  Sometimes I can be attracted to the idea of limiting it severely though 

I don’t feel guilty from pleasure, rather that it feels messy, kinda depleting  when it’s excessive in the moment, and sometimes it takes my focus away from tasks 

7 hours ago, UnbornTao said:

As for music again, what's the problem? You could limit it to certain hours, but I see it as mostly beneficial. It's generally not considered an addiction or harmful habit unless it starts interfering with your daily life.

Yes I’d agree. It occasionally interferes when I procrastinate sleep and study to listen instead. 
 

I sometimes daydream when I listen to music and it makes me more absorbed in my thoughts which I don’t find as an optimal state 

Edited 2 hours ago by Sugarcoat

[Schizophonia]

1 hour ago, Sugarcoat said:

I’m not always sure where that urge comes from.

The urge of being chubbier as I adviced you 

😏