Exhausted from only dating low-consciousness women

[Monke]

Has anyone else had the experience of developing enough charisma, social skills, etc. to get decent amounts of attention from women but being put off by how shockingly low consciousness most of the women you meet are? 

I know it sounds horribly judgmental but nearly every date I've been on and every woman I've slept with in my life except maybe one didn't actually DO anything other than endure wage slavery (without trying to plan an escape), scroll tiktok, and engage in petty drama on social media. That's literally it. 

Most gen z women are utterly incapable of even a basic level of self awareness, even if they are otherwise perfectly sweet and kind people. I've genuinely enjoyed spending time with some of them but It was also incredibly obvious to me that they have an external "locus of control" and outsource all critical thinking to talking heads online. They also tend to have zero interest in personal development, spirituality, or even developing a sense of passion for life in general. Zero.

I also find that the whole "women don't take accountability" trope to be shockingly accurate. especially with younger women. It doesn't seem like a choice to avoid truth but rather that they have no idea how to even understand "accountability" on a conceptual level. 

I find that other Gen z men who actually face difficulty in their lives and think for themselves (no goofy incel ideology, etc.) are much more common and are at a significantly higher level of development than the vast majority of women of the same age. 

The men having the most success are physically attractive but also the most low consciousness. It seems that stage green women often pursue stage red men.

It's difficult to see the types of men that modern women flock to and still feel that it is even remotely worth it to pursue relationships as a young man who is actually interested in developing genuine maturity. 

How can you succeed in dating when modern women overwhelming flock to low-consciousness behavior?

 

 

 

 

[Sugarcoat]

I’ve also passed my phase of social anxiety in my life and developed enough social skills to be able to socialize and attract partners (but I’m still very much introverted)

I think when you come to this point it’s mostly a matter of just exposing yourself to more people, at the right places, taking opportunity to talk. Maybe you do that enough already so sorry if I’m stating the obvious. But let’s say you’re a guy like yourself and you go to nightclub then maybe chance is very low you’ll find a woman of your wavelength , but if you look at the right places the chances are higher.

Also maybe obvious again, but have you tried to have deeper convos with women or do you more just vibe as usual and kinda wait for them to show signs of depth. Because sometimes people might reveal it when someone else goes to that place first.. idk. Like you might not notice the depth of someone if you don’t initiate that type of convo first 

I hope mods don’t remove this topic thinking it’s offensive or something because it’s genuinely interesting and we need to be able to talk about flaws of humanity, in respectful manner ofc🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

Edited 5 hours ago by Sugarcoat

[Monke]

@Sugarcoat  I could probably try meeting people in different environments. It's just difficult when the "default" is bars, clubs, etc. But you make a good point that perhaps I haven't fully considered. 

I guess I haven't really explored "initiating" more depth-oriented conversation with the women I date. I've honestly avoided that because I've assumed that if she's obsessed with tiktok/influencer drama she probably won't be interested in my attempts to connect on deeper level. But people are different. I guess its a balance between reading the room and not making unfair assumptions about people lol. 

Also I agree that it's important to be able to discuss this sort of thing as long as it's free of judgement. I think people get really wrapped up in wanting to feel superior to others or more  "advanced" or some crap. 

But it's also a trap to ignore the fact that committing to this sort of personal dev stuff will make you super unrelatable to significant percentage of people. 

I wish this forum/Leo talked about this topic more often. Meeting your needs for connection and community becomes significantly more difficult as you grow and develop yourself. Sometimes shockingly so. 

[aurum]

1 hour ago, Monke said:

They also tend to have zero interest in personal development, spirituality, or even developing a sense of passion for life in general. Zero.

Women are going to have a different relationship to these things than you.

Don't look for women who are deeply into spirituality or personal development. Look for women who are wanting to be in your frame.

[Hojo]

Theres a reason we have hormones. Cause women are boring. If a man is indoctrinated a woman is 3 x more indoctrinated. They literally just talk to themselves ,you can have a conversation with very basic answers and they will think an exchange of ideas is happening. 

The easiest way to talk to a woman is to not pay attention to anything they say then play back the last sentence and ask a question about it.

Oh thats interesting why do you think that.

I was once so high talking to my mother and I couldn't focus on anything. I was just seeing God flicker in and out of my awareness, so I just tried to pay attention to  the last sentence my mother was saying and I realized that if I just paid attention to that and asked a question she wouldn't have any idea. Meanwhile nothing was filtering through.

Women like to complain alot so you gotta deal with that. If you want high conciousness you need to find a millennial woman.

I dated a woman who would come home from work and sit in my lap and complain for hours on end while I pretend to listen and gamed. It worked pretty good.

Edited 2 hours ago by Hojo

[Natasha Tori Maru]

23 minutes ago, Hojo said:

Theres a reason we have hormones. Cause women are boring. If a man is indoctrinated a woman is 3 x more indoctrinated. They literally just talk to themselves ,you can have a conversation with very basic answers and they will think an exchange of ideas is happening. 

The easiest way to talk to a woman is to not pay attention to anything they say then play back the last sentence and ask a question about it.

Oh thats interesting why do you think that.

I was once so high talking to my mother and I couldn't focus on anything. I was just seeing God flicker in and out of my awareness, so I just tried to pay attention to  the last sentence my mother was saying and I realized that if I just paid attention to that and asked a question she wouldn't have any idea. Meanwhile nothing was filtering through.

Women like to complain alot so you gotta deal with that. If you want high conciousness you need to find a millennial woman.

I dated a woman who would come home from work and sit in my lap and complain for hours on end while I pretend to listen and gamed. It worked pretty good.

I mean, you can approach it this way. Sure.

But you will attract women who are boring and screen out those who are more interesting.

The smart ones will see how you are barely paying attention and drop you instantly. 

Self fulfilling prophecy.

[Hojo]

@Natasha Tori Maru I've have never met an interesting woman in my life. If I want to talk about my feelings I talk to my friends. Woman cant help men with existential problems. Men don't have social problems like women have. If they do its because they are indoctrinated into womanhood. My hormones tricked me into pursuing them.

Edited 1 hour ago by Hojo

[Monke]

@aurum

1 hour ago, aurum said:

Women are going to have a different relationship to these things than you.

Don't look for women who are deeply into spirituality or personal development. Look for women who are wanting to be in your frame.

This is interesting. I haven't considered the possibility that frame is actually more important. 

Perhaps I've set an unrealistic expectation here. 

[Monke]

@Hojo this reeks of resentment towards women. 

[Hojo]

@Monke Your post sounds more like resentment towards woman than mine. You are literally saying you can't find high conciousness woman.

Edited 1 hour ago by Hojo

[Monke]

@Natasha Tori Maru  

9 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

I mean, you can approach it this way. Sure.

But you will attract women who are boring and screen out those who are more interesting.

The smart ones will see how you are barely paying attention and drop you instantly. 

Self fulfilling prophecy.

Men don't realize that their own broad generalizations about women pre-select for experiences that foster even more resentment and bitterness. It's easier to believe all women are a monolith that you can understand with 100% accuracy than to realize that the good ones just don't like you. Hence the entire redpill/manosphere. Grateful to have escaped that ideological trap in my early 20s. 

[Hojo]

@Monke You just made a broad generalization of men. Are you a woman or are you being hypocritical? You just trapped yourself.

Edited 1 hour ago by Hojo

[Natasha Tori Maru]

4 minutes ago, Monke said:

Grateful to have escaped that ideological trap in my early 20s. 

Yeah, fuck yeah! Genuinely glad for you as well

It is hell to try to guide men out of that sort of thinking/cognitive bias. You must have pretty good meta-cognition to have made it out.

Nothing worse than self-filtering out the best women there are that match you well, and having no idea you are doing it.

[Monke]

@Hojo I mean not really?

All levels of "consciousness" are valid and none are inherently any better than any others. It would be absurdly ignorant to think everyone should conform to my worldview or share my values just because I've done more spiritual/personal dev work than some of people. That basically defeats the entire point of doing this work to begin with. 

But yeah people are just at different places spiritually, etc. It's obvious than an Evangelical Christian from rural Alabama is almost certainly operating at a lower level of consciousness than Ram Dass. Extreme example but still. 

So my post was more about my frustration with finding women that see the importance of growing and challenging yourself in general regardless of where they are along their own path. The point is that I want to find a woman willing to walk that path with me. 

[Hojo]

@Monke Yes you've met 1 woman in your entire dating history that wants to grow and expand themselves spiritually i get it. But i reek of resentment.

[aurum]

45 minutes ago, Monke said:

@aurum

This is interesting. I haven't considered the possibility that frame is actually more important. 

Perhaps I've set an unrealistic expectation here. 

Yup, you got it.

Being in your frame is the core of her femininity.

Then you lead her where you envision the relationship going.

[Schizophonia]

Because you are not of ””high consciousness”” yourself, no matter what story you tell yourself.

 

[Monke]

@Natasha Tori Maru

15 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Yeah, fuck yeah! Genuinely glad for you as well

It is hell to try to guide men out of that sort of thinking/cognitive bias. You must have pretty good meta-cognition to have made it out.

Nothing worse than self-filtering out the best women there are that match you well, and having no idea you are doing it.

Thanks! Yeah it was a rough climb out of that hole. Lots of regret for opportunities missed. 

Dating is frustrating in general hence my post lol but yeah turns out women aren't super stoked to sleep with you if your entire self concept is so fragile it immediately crumbles if she doesn't want to. 

It's a shame because it really sets men up for failure with male friendships too. I'm so glad I didn't know many of my friends when I was indoctrinated because like how embarrassing lol. 

Just hoping my 15 year old cousin doesn't fall down the pipeline. Gonna lose my ever loving shit the second he mentions Tate and his bugatti. 

 

[Monke]

@Schizophonia

7 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Because you are not of ””high consciousness”” yourself, no matter what story you tell yourself.

 

I mean yeah definitely possible. I suspect I'm late stage green/early yellowish but could always be wrong. A lot of women I've dated appear to be heavily orange. 

[Leo Gura]

Exhausted from only dating raccoons. They never understand me