Working With A Delusional Spiritual Person, Feeling Unsafe

[pursuitofspirit]

So I work at a vape shop and about a month ago an employee was transferred from a sister shop to work at our shop for a few months before he goes on to manage a new shop opening in a few months in a different town. Our first shift together was really odd, I intuitively picked up on a weird energy from the guy but I wrote it off as nothing and figured it was just because I didn't know him well yet. As time went on I became more interested in him because he claimed to have experienced awakenings and seemed to have a decent grasp of spiritual ideas, but something always felt a little off, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It's also important to note that he also identifies as a "Juggalo" and everything about him tends to slant in a dark psychopathic direction, from his juggalo tattoos of the hatchet man logo to even the clothes he wears often having words like "psychopath" written right on them. Whenever we listen to his music at work, it's often that very dark ICP style rap about killing people.

We work three 8-hour shifts alone together each week, and every time we are together our conversation usually ends up going in the philosophical direction, and although he tends to have decent insight at times and can say some interesting things regarding spirituality, I've noticed he is very attached to his worldview and ideas. Specifically his ideas of awakening and enlightenment, which differ dramatically from mine. I even kindly disagreed with his interpretation of awakening one time and he became very emotionally reactive and defensive. He also constantly references the human design system and seems to worship it as being the "key" to awakening and spirituality, which I also disagree with. The map is not the territory.

Regardless, it has been relatively tolerable working with him up until a shift last week where he disclosed some pretty dark and delusional ideas to me. What he said to me was this:

"I watched a human design reading of Jeffrey Dahmer and its pretty crazy that his spiritual purpose was to awaken humanity through his murders, you know, we usually think of awakening and enlightenment to be a positive and good thing but Jeffrey Dahmer is an example of how awakening can be different for everyone!"

He then went on to say:

"It kind of crazy because me and Jeffrey Dahmer have the exact same human design types!" 

"You know, I really relate to serial killers, I always have. My human design charts are exactly like theirs!"

I instinctively responded in a neutral way, saying something like "yeah, that's crazy man"

But inside I was in shock by his claim - that murdering people can be a "path to awakening" and that he relates to serial killers and always has. The energy I was picking up on was very dark and distorted. It was similar to what I felt to when I first met him, only now I had insight into what that intuition actually was. It was like he was romanticizing serial killers and delusionally thinking that murdering people can be a legitimate path to "awakening". Crazy.

A few hours later he confided in me again, and said this:

"You know I think about killing people a lot. It's a big part of my shadow. I've always delt with it and its been a huge battle of mine to not do anything stupid."

I responded: "That's interesting man, if you think about it that darkness is within all of us". Just trying to find common ground and keep it neutral.

Again I was shocked, partly by his honesty, but also by the dark nature of what he was sharing with me. Needless to say I felt quite unsafe the rest of the night but was able to play it cool, and eventually our shift ended and I headed home. 

So I'm curious what the forum thinks: How would be the best to proceed knowing I have to work alone with someone like this for 8 hours a shift? Eventually he will leave and transfer to a new store but in the mean time I need to be wise about how I handle this situation. I never felt totally comfortable with him and now I have even more evidence that points to why I feel that way. This guy seems to be a perfect case study for how the ego can distort ideas of spirituality and awakening to fit a delusional worldview or paradigm.

Any responses are appreciated. Thanks.

Edited 17 hours ago by pursuitofspirit

[Sugarcoat]

Him saying those things is a legit reason for concern. One idea I got is if you’d report to the manager the worst things he’s said so he would maybe have to quit the job even if it’s short, but maybe that’s stupid because if he finds out the reason he got fired he might react badly who knows. I think id keep doing like you and staying calm and chill and not too opposing in responses to keep the vibe okay. Then maybe if it’s possible to have company after work or something or even at work by someone…
 

One thought is also that since he openly admitted to you his homicidal thoughts, maybe he wouldn’t directly target you, maybe if someone has homicidal thoughts and is legit targeting someone they wouldn’t tell them anything suspicious to not raise suspicion. Or he just can’t control himself and over shares regardless …

Edited 16 hours ago by Sugarcoat

[Aaron p]

Maybe call the authorities mate, that's not a normal conversation. 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

I have experienced something similar when I worked in retail.

I transferred away to another store - which in retrospect, I was VERY fortunate to be able to do.

I worked with them for 2 months before that. They had a psychotic break a year after all this.

Look up 'grey rock' technique to use in the meantime before another solution can be found. This helped me with hard boundaries, and I used it as a way to protect myself.

I've been around dangerous and violent people for most of my younger years. Addicts, mentally ill. Violent, troubled people - but these types have compassion still. The type of person you describe could be a sociopath/psychopath similar to the one I dealt with. They have a different sort of brain wiring that almost comes across as inhuman and devoid of compassion and empathy. At the time I lived with a very violent individual that did me a lot of harm, and he met this disturbed man I worked with: 'Tash you need to get away from that person. That is not a person' This came from someone who had their own troubles.

Can you alter shifts at all? Overall I would advice against challenging this individuals worldview....

[Breakingthewall]

99,9% he's a clown with very low self esteem trying to impress you and thus see him selfreflected as "important" and alleviate his horrible feeling of inadequacy. He's what is called a narcissist. Can be dangerous? 99,99% no . Barking dog doesn't bite .

[cetus]

8 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

The type of person you describe could be a sociopath/psychopath

Exactly! I lived with one for 17 years, so I know all too well the signs. They are wired completely different. Sure, in the public eye they will appear to be completely normal but that's all a well-honed performance to hide the evil within.

6 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

99,9% he's a clown with very low self esteem trying to impress you and thus see him selfreflected as "important" and alleviate his horrible feeling of inadequacy. He's what is called a narcissist. Can be dangerous? 99,99% no . Barking dog doesn't bite .

You are correct about the low self-esteem. But they know how to bite without leaving marks. They thrive by watching the expression on your face change when they say something they know is unsettling and disturbing. And they love it.

Edited 7 hours ago by cetus

[Hojo]

Maybe he wanted you to be honest with him too and tell him what you think honestly. He was honest you lied. A juggalo is a baby. Just be like bro when you talk about killing people its fucked up im people, essentially threatening me.

Edited 6 hours ago by Hojo

[Breakingthewall]

2 hours ago, cetus said:

You are correct about the low self-esteem. But they know how to bite without leaving marks. They thrive by watching the expression on your face change when they say something they know is unsettling and disturbing. And they love it.

2 hours ago, cetus said:

 

Agree, that's true, people like that enjoy making an impact, and some can go to dangerous extremes. But those who talks about it, I think they won't act. You never know of course 

[pursuitofspirit]

12 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

Him saying those things is a legit reason for concern. One idea I got is if you’d report to the manager the worst things he’s said so he would maybe have to quit the job even if it’s short, but maybe that’s stupid because if he finds out the reason he got fired he might react badly who knows. I think id keep doing like you and staying calm and chill and not too opposing in responses to keep the vibe okay. Then maybe if it’s possible to have company after work or something or even at work by someone…

Yeah I plan on playing it cool and remaining neutral.

13 hours ago, Sugarcoat said:

One thought is also that since he openly admitted to you his homicidal thoughts, maybe he wouldn’t directly target you, maybe if someone has homicidal thoughts and is legit targeting someone they wouldn’t tell them anything suspicious to not raise suspicion. Or he just can’t control himself and over shares regardless …

And I agree. It seems like he felt safe enough to share all that with me so hopefully that means I'm not a symbolic target... but still very unsettling.

[pursuitofspirit]

12 hours ago, Aaron p said:

Maybe call the authorities mate, that's not a normal conversation. 

If it escalates I may just do that.

[pursuitofspirit]

12 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

I have experienced something similar when I worked in retail.

I transferred away to another store - which in retrospect, I was VERY fortunate to be able to do.

I worked with them for 2 months before that. They had a psychotic break a year after all this.

Look up 'grey rock' technique to use in the meantime before another solution can be found. This helped me with hard boundaries, and I used it as a way to protect myself.

I've been around dangerous and violent people for most of my younger years. Addicts, mentally ill. Violent, troubled people - but these types have compassion still. The type of person you describe could be a sociopath/psychopath similar to the one I dealt with. They have a different sort of brain wiring that almost comes across as inhuman and devoid of compassion and empathy. At the time I lived with a very violent individual that did me a lot of harm, and he met this disturbed man I worked with: 'Tash you need to get away from that person. That is not a person' This came from someone who had their own troubles.

Can you alter shifts at all? Overall I would advice against challenging this individuals worldview....

I'll look up the technique, thanks for sharing. And currently am not able to alter shifts, but it's all good. I'm just going to remain as neutral as possible and like you said, avoid challenging him. Within a few months he will be transferred to a new store so I'm hoping to just hold out until then.

[pursuitofspirit]

10 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

99,9% he's a clown with very low self esteem trying to impress you and thus see him selfreflected as "important" and alleviate his horrible feeling of inadequacy. He's what is called a narcissist. Can be dangerous? 99,99% no . Barking dog doesn't bite .

Yeah I'm not sure. What he shared with me seemed very delusional and dangerous - all my intuitive fibers were ringing with alarm. But I think it's best to just play it cool and be neutral around the guy. I do think he has some sort of self esteem issues, that's a good point.

[pursuitofspirit]

3 hours ago, Hojo said:

Maybe he wanted you to be honest with him too and tell him what you think honestly. He was honest you lied. A juggalo is a baby. Just be like bro when you talk about killing people its fucked up im people, essentially threatening me.

No that was not the vibe at all. When he told me it was like he was excited by delusional fantasy. I think how I responded was instinctive and appropriate. 

[Hojo]

@pursuitofspirit never fear a retarded juggalo, guy cant even tie his own shoes. Just say woop woop you are instantly friends.

Edited 2 hours ago by Hojo