Twin Flames

[decentralized]

They are just delusions, right? Has anyone in this forum experienced this?

Nowadays members are discussing psychedelic delusions in this forum. Though Ketamine is not a psychedelic, it has psychedelic effects on some people and it made me believe some guy is my twin flame. Turns out I have (or lets say, had) anxious attachment style and he has an avoidant attachment style, that was the cause of the push pull dynamic between us. Or maybe simply he was not as interested as I was. I mixed kundalini yoga with ketamine (very bad idea) to read his mind because I firmly believed there was an inherent connection between us. This guy kept ghosting me though, which made me even more obsessed. I stopped taking psychedelics since almost 2 years and I am still healing from my delusional thoughts about twin flames, solipsism, God, Truth etc. Psychedelics definitely amplify whatever delusions you have if you are not careful. 

[theleelajoker]

I bet:

• Look inside and the silence will answer all your questions
• No other answer will ever give you peace on this, because every answer will create new question

[Salvijus]

Not sure about twin flames but I do believe in God arranged relationships. If you're in tune with your heart, it will lead you to the right people, not just the romantic relationships but of every kind. It could be the right group of people "accidentally" meeting and they are perfect for the project you're working on. It happens all the time. If God sees you need a relationship to fulfill your life's purpose, he will give you one. Look at Stephen Hawking

Edited June 2 by Salvijus

[Hojo]

They could he real but in the sense that they are meant to be together forever is bullshit. If you have a twin flame it probably won't end nicely. You both are on fire for eachother that results in burning eachother. Twin flames are probably there to break eachother. In the sense God put them together to absolutely ruin one or more parties and that party was the only one the other will allow to do it.

Edited June 2 by Hojo

[Natasha Tori Maru]

5 hours ago, Hojo said:

They could he real but in the sense that they are meant to be together forever is bullshit. If you have a twin flame it probably won't end nicely. You both are on fire for eachother that results in burning eachother. Twin flames are probably there to break eachother. In the sense God put them together to absolutely ruin one or more parties and that party was the only one the other will allow to do it.

This is similar to my understanding of Twin Flames.

It is the type of relationship you attract that triggers all issues to rise to the surface. This process happens usually when one person has some sort of trauma or attachment wound - and attracts another with a similar opposite attachment/trauma. Both parties will experience an intense attraction and limerence, as each individual carries the blueprint of the wound the caused the others issue. If the relationship plays out as it should - and it is not meant to last - it is supposed to 'break' all attachment issues and heal wounds. 

But due to the volatile energy between the parties it does not last. It is a short-cut healing relationship that forces accelerated growth.

This is just my understanding.

Twin Flame relationships seem to be a trendy thing - like it is something to aspire to. I don't think many people understand they are actually very very painful.

Edited June 3 by Natasha Tori Maru

[Xonas Pitfall]

“Twin Flames” is a term often used to describe a connection where both people deeply trigger one another in ways that catalyze growth. The cliché example might be a shy, anxious, people-pleasing “good girl” with an avoidant, rebellious “bad boy”... or a BPD drawn to an NPD, or a dependent personality entangled with a narcissist or sociopath. But it can also be more subtle, like a hyper-responsible, clean-freak eldest daughter meeting a laid-back, carefree youngest sibling. These aren’t rigid stereotypes, but you get the idea.

Pairings like these can be powerful for self-awareness and growth because they highlight each other's blind spots. But more often than not, both people are too stuck in their patterns to give the relationship the breathing room needed for actual transformation. For example, a chronic people-pleaser might never learn to set boundaries or stop overgiving, so the narcissistic partner never faces the consequences of their actions or grows from them. And on the flip side, the narcissist may never learn to truly attune, give, or show up for someone else. The dynamic stays stuck and eventually breaks.

These types of relationships only work if both people are self-aware and willing to put in real effort. Without that, it’s just pain and wasted time, especially for the more attached partner. If someone doesn’t care enough to reach out, show interest, or take accountability, please don’t wrap it up in spiritual delusion. That’s not a twin flame. Real twin flame dynamics involve mutual triggering and growth. If it’s one-sided, that’s not it.

Also, sometimes the person isn’t even “avoidant,” they’re just not that into you. It’s harsh, but true. A lot of people will casually flirt, hook up, or talk without ever feeling the depth the other person does - and that mismatch can send someone down a spiral. While we are at it, be careful as well not to label someone as 'avoidant' just to soften the blow. Sometimes people aren't struggling with attachment issues - they're just careless, selfish, or plain inconsiderate. You had a real, intimate connection, and he ghosted you without a word. That’s not a psychological pattern - that’s being a cu**. Really sorry that happened to you, you don't deserve any of it.

This dynamic is backed by a classic psychological experiment by B.F. Skinner, the founder of operant conditioning. In one of his most famous studies, he placed mice (and later pigeons) in what's now called a "Skinner Box," where they could press a lever to receive food. When the food was given consistently, the animals would press the lever only when they were hungry. But when the reward was given randomly or intermittently, the animals became obsessed. They would press the lever compulsively, ignoring sleep, food, and even basic survival needs. This pattern is called intermittent reinforcement, and it's been shown to be the most addictive reward schedule.

This same principle explains why gambling is so powerful - and also why toxic relationships can feel like a drug. When love, attention, or validation is offered unpredictably, your brain becomes wired to chase it, hoping for the next hit. Just like those mice, we can find ourselves fixated, neglecting everything else in life for the chance of that emotional payoff. Sound familiar?

Often, the people we become most obsessed with are the ones who are unavailable or uninterested, simply because the reward is uncertain. If they liked us right away, or if they never engaged with us at all, we wouldn’t be limerent or obsessed in the first place.

What I’d suggest for you is to look into the concept of limerence. Right now, I don’t think it’s helpful to dive too deeply into spiritual concepts, as they can sometimes worsen the delusion and intensify the limerence (as you saw in the thread), things can get pretty wild. What you really need is exposure to more people, so you can hopefully find a mutual connection.

Your brain is simply addicted to the intensity of love and connection it once felt, and it’s craving more of it, especially in a way that feels safe this time. It is possible to find someone who feels right and truly reciprocates your energy. When that happens, you’ll be shocked at how quickly the obsession can dissolve, or even just fade into a strange, distant memory. Alternatively, time can help too, but it’s a slower and less predictable path.

One positive thing about these kinds of experiences is that they can give you valuable insight into what you want and don’t want in a partner. Now you have more information about the kind of connection you’re looking for.

Ask yourself:

• What genuinely drew me to him in the beginning, before all the avoidance and mixed signals started?
• Was there a real attraction from the start, or did the inconsistency make me more obsessed over time?
• What were some red flags I overlooked that seem obvious in hindsight?

Reflecting on these can help you better understand your patterns and preferences moving forward. Good Luck, I believe in you. Spiritual hugs!   

Edited June 3 by Xonas Pitfall

[Natasha Tori Maru]

2 hours ago, Xonas Pitfall said:

“Twin Flames” is a term often used to describe a connection where both people deeply trigger one another in ways that catalyze growth. The cliché example might be a shy, anxious, people-pleasing “good girl” with an avoidant, rebellious “bad boy”... or a BPD drawn to an NPD, or a dependent personality entangled with a narcissist or sociopath. But it can also be more subtle, like a hyper-responsible, clean-freak eldest daughter meeting a laid-back, carefree youngest sibling. These aren’t rigid stereotypes, but you get the idea.

Pairings like these can be powerful for self-awareness and growth because they highlight each other's blind spots. But more often than not, both people are too stuck in their patterns to give the relationship the breathing room needed for actual transformation. For example, a chronic people-pleaser might never learn to set boundaries or stop overgiving, so the narcissistic partner never faces the consequences of their actions or grows from them. And on the flip side, the narcissist may never learn to truly attune, give, or show up for someone else. The dynamic stays stuck and eventually breaks.

These types of relationships only work if both people are self-aware and willing to put in real effort. Without that, it’s just pain and wasted time, especially for the more attached partner. If someone doesn’t care enough to reach out, show interest, or take accountability, please don’t wrap it up in spiritual delusion. That’s not a twin flame. Real twin flame dynamics involve mutual triggering and growth. If it’s one-sided, that’s not it.

Also, sometimes the person isn’t even “avoidant,” they’re just not that into you. It’s harsh, but true. A lot of people will casually flirt, hook up, or talk without ever feeling the depth the other person does - and that mismatch can send someone down a spiral. While we are at it, be careful as well not to label someone as 'avoidant' just to soften the blow. Sometimes people aren't struggling with attachment issues - they're just careless, selfish, or plain inconsiderate. You had a real, intimate connection, and he ghosted you without a word. That’s not a psychological pattern - that’s being a cu**. Really sorry that happened to you, you don't deserve any of it.

This dynamic is backed by a classic psychological experiment by B.F. Skinner, the founder of operant conditioning. In one of his most famous studies, he placed mice (and later pigeons) in what's now called a "Skinner Box," where they could press a lever to receive food. When the food was given consistently, the animals would press the lever only when they were hungry. But when the reward was given randomly or intermittently, the animals became obsessed. They would press the lever compulsively, ignoring sleep, food, and even basic survival needs. This pattern is called intermittent reinforcement, and it's been shown to be the most addictive reward schedule.

This same principle explains why gambling is so powerful - and also why toxic relationships can feel like a drug. When love, attention, or validation is offered unpredictably, your brain becomes wired to chase it, hoping for the next hit. Just like those mice, we can find ourselves fixated, neglecting everything else in life for the chance of that emotional payoff. Sound familiar?

Often, the people we become most obsessed with are the ones who are unavailable or uninterested, simply because the reward is uncertain. If they liked us right away, or if they never engaged with us at all, we wouldn’t be limerent or obsessed in the first place.

What I’d suggest for you is to look into the concept of limerence. Right now, I don’t think it’s helpful to dive too deeply into spiritual concepts, as they can sometimes worsen the delusion and intensify the limerence (as you saw in the thread), things can get pretty wild. What you really need is exposure to more people, so you can hopefully find a mutual connection.

Your brain is simply addicted to the intensity of love and connection it once felt, and it’s craving more of it, especially in a way that feels safe this time. It is possible to find someone who feels right and truly reciprocates your energy. When that happens, you’ll be shocked at how quickly the obsession can dissolve, or even just fade into a strange, distant memory. Alternatively, time can help too, but it’s a slower and less predictable path.

One positive thing about these kinds of experiences is that they can give you valuable insight into what you want and don’t want in a partner. Now you have more information about the kind of connection you’re looking for.

Ask yourself:

• What genuinely drew me to him in the beginning, before all the avoidance and mixed signals started?
• Was there a real attraction from the start, or did the inconsistency make me more obsessed over time?
• What were some red flags I overlooked that seem obvious in hindsight?

Reflecting on these can help you better understand your patterns and preferences moving forward. Good Luck, I believe in you. Spiritual hugs!   

Well said! 

[Leo Gura]

God told me my twin flame is a crocodile in a Mississippi swamp.

Her name is Gertrude.

Edited June 3 by Leo Gura

[Xonas Pitfall]

@Leo Gura What color is your crocodile hot witch girlfriend? 

[manuel bon]

In my opinion it's not about twin flames, they don't exist, even if you might feel that way.

It's about the people you meet in your life, and realizing that everyone plays a specific role, that helps you shape the person you are and will be. A twin flame is probably when you have enough experience, and you know what in a person resonates with you and what doesn't, and that twin flame will help you shape yourself to something that you want to be.

But maybe idk what I'm telling about