First time 5 meo trip report

[emil1234]

So i finally had my first 5meo trip, after years of spiritual development and build up.

Some background knowledge

I've had spiritual practice for 3 years roughly , meditating for 1-2 hours daily, practicing mindfulness 24/7.

I've had 12 LSD trips, 3 ayahuasca trips, and 2 dmt trips (and now one 5meo trip).

I also do breathwork on a regular basis, eating healthy and excersicing nearly every day.

The trip

I will be skipping the setup and buildup, for the sake of relevans. I was guided by an experienced facilitator.

We had agreed that at first, i'd be given an intro dose (15mg) in order for me to have a feel of what its like, before diving into the larger dose. Note that I am EXTREMELY sensitive to psychedelics. this was the toad, BUFO, not synthetic, which has very different dosage scalings.

The first puff

So I took one big puff, 15mg, held it in for roughly 15 seconds and exhaled. I was quickly surprised by the amount of visuals, since 5meo is known for its lack of visuals. But the visuals felt like a side effect, or a biproduct of sorts. they seemed to have little relevans to the overall experience of the trip. What i noticed was that the idea of past and future completely dissappeared, nearly instantly. it was like i was completely locked into the moment. I very quickly understood what leo was talking about when he talked of consciousness like a knob that could be increased infinitely. I dont know how to explain it, but taking that vape of 5-meo felt like i was injesting pure life into myself. Everything became crystal clear, like i had 8k vision, very similar to other psychedelics. At this point however, the psychedelic imagery / visuals had dissappeared, and what i was left with was an extremely clear picture of reality, and the overwhelming experience of "I AM".

I laughed hard at the idea that i had every feared anything. because all fears, and ideas of good and bad were just that; ideas. nothing is inherintly good or bad. the idea of fear, death, just seemed so ridicolus to me.

I felt like i merged completely with my "core". all my conditionings, my ideas, thoughts, traumas were removed, and what i was left with was just my own pure being, completely unaltered. I felt an extreme love, a love that is so remeniscant of my childhood, because thats what i fundamentally was before all my conditionings of society. a being of love, joy and curiosity.

I also had the common psychedelic experience of "oneness" of course, but nothing much more intense than what i've experienced on LSD or ayahuasca.

All in all, the experience lasted roughly 15-20 min. It was a rather mild experience, but still very intense comparatively to the dose i took. the facilitator said he hadnt seen anyone react this intensely at such a low dose.

The second puff

Due to my relatively intense reaction to the low dose of 15 mg, I decided that i would go for a second dose of no more than 25 mg, roughyl 20 min after the first puff. And this should prove to be a clever choice lol.

I felt very confident, because the first puff wasnt scary AT ALL, it felt completely comfortable and safe.

So i went in confidently, and was disproven rather quickly. The experience was COMPLETELY different from this first one, at first at least. I was emersed completely in visual imagery. I felt very scared, and like i had finally managed to break my mind. I had trouble letting go, especially because i couldnt feel myself breathing, or at least, it was like I had to actively remember to breathe, otherwise i would just suffocate. it was like my breathing had switched to manual gear lol, it was very weird.

But after some time, i managed to surrender to the experience, and all the fear and dread dissappared completely in an instant. all of my ideas and expectations had gone completely away.

This is where i had the epiphany. The love that was inside of me was not only inside of me. My very core. it was inside EVERYTHING else as well. it was a very personal experience, because it was not something foreign at all, it was ME, who i'd always been, but had been clouded by ideas, society, perceptions and misidentifications. 

It felt so fucking nostalgic and home like. I had finally come home to myself. and ME permiated everything else. I truly understood what is meant by Atman is Brahman. it was so fucking beautiful.

At this point i had completely given in, and trusted the experience fully. it was like I connected COMPLETELY with everything else that was happening, like i was a piece in a puzzle that just fit in COMPLETELY with everything else, the sounds, the sensations of the bed, everything. everything was orcestrated so unbelieveably masterfully, litterally incomprehensible for the ordinary human mind. but its what we're surrounded by all the time, we just lack the perception to acknowledge it. at that point i felt like i got the cosmic joke, or a taste of enlightenment. and i will not try to put into words, because i cannot. but it felt like for a fraction of a second I not only became one with the Now, but i actually merged INTO the Now. like i had a peek inside of it.

but i can tell you that i broke out into the biggest laughter i ever had. and i couldnt stop laughing.

the trip was at its end, and i was so cleared about everything, so fucking ready to tackle life head on. i just wanted to go out and hug and love everyone so much. i truly felt like i was a child again, like there was no fucking doubt, that that state was my natural state back when i was a child, before all of my conditionings.

Looking back

So there it is. As mentioned, i only took rather small doses, but due to my sensitivity i still had relatively intense experiences. I had no direct God realizations, no direct insights into infinity or infinite intelligence, or anything of that sorts. But I truly feel like the experience was the perfect experience for me, right now at this moment. I could have gone for a higher dose, trying to get deeper, but after my first puff, I felt very clearly that today was not the day I was gonna realize God or infinity. But that day will come

Im so filled with awe and joy for life, i cannot put it into words. life is too good to be true. 

team in love with consciousness <---- 

thank you for reading!

 

Edited December 28, 2024 by emil1234

[Jowblob]

Fantastic, glad it worked out for you and you enjoyed it.

[emil1234]

@RightHand @Jowblob ty friends!

[Davino]

1 hour ago, emil1234 said:

taking that vape of 5-meo felt like i was injesting pure life into myself

Yes

Sometimes it feels like ingesting consciousness or light

1 hour ago, emil1234 said:

This is where i had the epiphany. The love that was inside of me was not only inside of me. My very core. it was inside EVERYTHING else as well. it was a very personal experience, because it was not something foreign at all, it was ME, who i'd always been, but had been clouded by ideas, society, perceptions and misidentifications. 

It feels so natural, right?

1 hour ago, emil1234 said:

but i can tell you that i broke out into the biggest laughter i ever had. and i couldnt stop laughing.

[emil1234]

17 minutes ago, Davino said:

It feels so natural, right?

 

Literally the most natural thing i've ever experienced. Nothing new was added at all, illusory filters were simply removed

[Leo Gura]

Nice report. Great. You entered the gate.

But you have yet to be skull-raped by Infinity.

Edited December 29, 2024 by Leo Gura

[Vynce]

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Nice report. Great. You entered the gate.

But you have yet to be skull-raped by Infinity.

If Leo is ever going to open a Bufo Alvarius retreat center its gonna be called "Skull Rape To Infinite - Residence". 

[emil1234]

On 29.12.2024 at 1:54 AM, Leo Gura said:

But you have yet to be skull-raped by Infinity.

yes i will be looking forward to this

[LoneWonderer]

🙏🙏🙏