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Loreena

Judging Is So F Insane

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Judging others is so bad. When you feel like people around you are judging you and you know you did nothing wrong. And they keep telling you it's your fault all the time. Positive criticism is okay, But someone who doesn't really understand you, doesn't have the right to judge you. Have you ever encountered such experiences with your family, friends or coworkers. Has that impacted your performance or job in any way.

I think these days we see a lot of celebrities being targeted unfairly on social media twitter and instagram for the comments they make, even for the clothes they wear. One of the reasons why being on social media is so tough.

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I like this quote that says a friend is a person who listens. It's so true.

 

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In our struggle to keep toxic people away, we have to be careful around judgmental people and avoid them at best, There's no point in constantly trying to defend yourself when nobody understands or cares. So how do you deal with such situations if you are currently experiencing them or have encountered them before.

 

I personally try to avoid and not give a damn. But sometimes it's not that easy.

The other day I came across this video and it resonated so much with whatever I have experienced often, although on a much much smaller scale. But when such small experiences are magnified, look what they can lead to - damage to reputation, lawsuits, lost endorsements, lost jobs etc. Even when this nba player in the video didn't do anything, people judged him beforehand, even without waiting for the real story to come out he lost so much because of stupid accusations made against him. He eventually was back on track, but he suffered needlessly.

This video is so important because it opened my eyes to how judgmental people can be. And how it can impact someone's life seriously so it's not just about "who cares," you have to care when your reputation and money is on the line. It's so easy for people to make accusations and just run to the law, like the girl here never understood the consequences of her actions and what impact it  would have on the guy's career. She went public even before trying to verify things and sorting it out.

In a scenario, when we judge people(even before hearing them out ), we only have victims and no winners. I think the real victim in the above story was Chris and his story reflects the nature of things in society, He must have never dreamed that such a small thing would lead to such a big issue.

This case and similar others is a representation of a society quick to judge. I think that some initial investigation and verification would have easily prevented the damage Chris suffered but it was all blown out of proportion because everyone involved never really cared to hear the other side or even check the facts.

It's important for society to be more open-minded and adopt a more neutral attitude towards each other, instead of being quick to point fingers.

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We need to create healthy societies, and for that we need to be understanding. We shouldn't be getting too much into each other's businesses especially when we know nothing about the facts or the people involved on a closer level.

In the end, the philosophy or the approach that people need to draw out of all of this really boils down to this "You mind your business and I'll mind mine." Until that doesn't happen, we can't expect change and incidents like these will continue.

 

Edited by Loreena

  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

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So what's this about?

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1 hour ago, Annetta said:

So what's this about?

This is about dealing with situations of judgment by people around you in different social environments like maybe classrooms, workplaces, family, social media and how it impacts you on both minor and major scale. On a minor scale, it's easier to say "who cares," but on a major scale,  what happens if your job is in jeopardy as a result of people judging you. So if you have encountered such situations, how have you dealt with them. And what do you think in relation to the video in point. What steps should society/people take in future to avoid the damage caused to Chris and reduce such occurrences ?


  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

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@Loreena How do you get over the fear of judgement?  Is this something you've been able to master?  It seems to be causing me a lot of problems.

Edit:  i didn't watch the whole thing, gimmi a few.

Edited by Annetta

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Just now, Annetta said:

@Loreena How do you get over the fear of judgement?  Is this something you've been able to master?  It seems to be causing me a lot of problems.

No I haven't been able to get over it myself because this is not as simple as it seems. When a person at your workplace is involved, it's always easy to ignore them. But it's hard when a huge group is doing the same because you won't be able to convince everyone about your innocence. 

Although it's important to be positive, it is disheartening no matter how strong you try to be while going through it. 

 


  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

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7 minutes ago, Annetta said:

@Loreena How do you get over the fear of judgement?  Is this something you've been able to master?  It seems to be causing me a lot of problems.

And I want to know what steps people take both to remove the fear of judgment as well as to deal with the situation when it arises. 


  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

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@Loreena Are you being bullied by a large group of people?

Watching the video, this is the second time I have heard about catfishing.  I feel really bad for the dude.  I feel bad for the troll chick, too, I know what it's like to be isolated and feel immature.
 

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Easier said than done, but it's a good video.

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19 minutes ago, Annetta said:

@Loreena Are you being bullied by a large group of people?

Watching the video, this is the second time I have heard about catfishing.  I feel really bad for the dude.  I feel bad for the troll chick, too, I know what it's like to be isolated and feel immature.
 

Yeah, I feel bad for her too, because I realized that she wasn't being intentional. By the way, she appears quite intelligent and could have used her internet skills in better ways. The catfishing is not a big deal imo, because it happens often and there are laws to deal with fraud. But it's essential to consider that there are no laws to prevent people from judging. And I thought it's a situation where one should learn to deal with on their own, however what people don't understand is the fact that one cannot deal with it on their own, especially when their job is at risk. This is where the cooperation of the law enforcement is required. It's easy for society to say "deal with it  " but it's not as easy as it looks. 

I was not bullied by a large group. But I have faced instances of bullying by groups that eventually faded with time. But they didn't cause me such harm. But as I was browsing through videos, I came across this and it dawned on me that when things happen on a magnified scale, they're no longer in the control of the individual and it's wrong to expect him to deal with it. This is where the law is required to deal with it. Also the other thing that can help is a social change where people should learn to invest less energy in witch-hunting and more energy in seeking the truth. A neutral non judgmental approach on society'part would have certainly done a great favor to Chris. 


  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

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What I feel is this. Celebrities should raise awareness about such issues especially when it can cause so much damage to their careers. Plus there should PSAs regarding this. There is need to increase social consciousness and awareness about how vicious judgment can be on a bigger scale. Also it's necessary to create awareness about the fact that people are merely wasting their  energy in blowing things out of proportion and in judging others. Just like there are laws for infringement of privacy, there should be laws to protect a person's reputation and prevent social pressure from harming his/her job, resources and health. 


  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

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Quote

Actions have reactions, don't be quick to judge
You may not know the hardships people don't speak of
It's best to step back, and observe with couth
For we all must meet our moment of truth

 


Can you bite your own teeth?  --  “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.

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On Friday, May 05, 2017 at 6:10 PM, Prabhaker said:

@Loreena Don't waste your Life Energy in Judging Others! Osho

 

 

Its a bit diificult for me to catch this accent, hindi english (loool). 

But I guess these guys are having some wise words for us. Must listen!

Edited by egoeimai

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What the fuck.

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This will be your face when you'll realize how pointless judgments are (for real) :P

eddie_murphy_wtf_gif.gif

@Annetta Yes, that would be a nice thing to do.

You will be so PEACEFUL when you won't judge anyone (even yourself) and anything anymore.

It's like night and day :)

Edited by Shin

God is love

Whoever lives in love lives in God

And God in them

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Maybe it's time to delve into my fear of judgement...

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@egoeimai It's nothing... I'm just going to work on my fear of judgement and negative evaluation sometime tomorrow so that things don't affect me to such a degree.

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5 minutes ago, Annetta said:

@egoeimai It's nothing... I'm just going to work on my fear of judgement and negative evaluation sometime tomorrow so that things don't affect me to such a degree.

It's gonna take at least a few weeks of intense work, probably months.

Be patient and don't forget to forgive/love yourself in the process ;)

Edited by Shin

God is love

Whoever lives in love lives in God

And God in them

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