Creepy Male Behaviour Examples Thread

[mmKay]

I'd like to compile all the behaviors that resemble poor social skills and trigger creepiness in women. 

This thread is for male behavior 

NO PERSONAL IDEOLOGY DEBATING. Post examples and you can discuss on that 

[mmKay]

The fux did I just watch. How does no one notice it's a dude. The end is hilarious though.

So many creeps

 

 

[mmKay]

Creepy dude at gas station. 4:45

 

[nhoktinvt]

all of this is game i'll say ppl with no game is more creepy, the 'creepy dude at gas station' ? he could be OR the 'brave dude that approached the wrong girl' how would you know the difference ?

[Consept]

 

[Buck Edwards]

The thread above this thread. 

[Emerald]

Here are some creepy behaviors that I've experienced from guys...

• Giving "friendly" hugs that are really an obvious excuse for copping a feel (there is one guy in particular from high school that I'm thinking of who used to be like "where's my hug"? And whenever he'd hug me or my female friends, he'd caress the sides of our waists by grasping his fingers around our sides in a tickling motion. I was in a very huggy friend-group, so we'd tended to hug a lot (guys and girls). But this particular guy was always trying to get really sexual with it.
• Saying "I would (date/fuck) you if you weren't so ____" I had one guy tell me me that he "would fuck me if it wasn't for the fact that I had such fucked up teeth". I also had another guy who said a similar thing... but it was "if your face wasn't so flat".
• Making inappropriate comments This has happened quite often. But one instance that comes to mind is when I was in college and busking in the pedestrian area near my school and this random middle aged man came and sat next to me while I was playing the guitar. And he just motioned his hands in front of his chest and said "You have really big boobs." I told him to stop and go away and with a pained look in his face he said, "I guess I'm just a small doses person then."
• Making threatening comments I was also busking one night and this man (maybe in his 50s) saw me there playing my guitar and he was making advances which I turned down. Then, he got really threatening and said "You better start getting used to running from me."
• Stating his requirements/likes about what he wants about a woman to a woman who hasn't expressed interest This sometimes is creepy and sometimes is just a red flag. I know it's happened to me before but I don't have a clear memory in my mind about it. But I usually see some version of it online where a guy is saying he wants a "submissive" woman. And as a woman who generally likes to have some elements of a more traditional man/woman pairing where the man is leading a bit more, it just gives off this icky immature vibe. 
• Following/stalking One time, I was walking back to my apartment from college and there was a guy that was on one of the last roads I had to turn down to get home. And he was clearly on something as he wasn't making much sense. He kept saying to me over and over "I write grants." I think he was trying to impress me by bragging about his job. But he was like a zombie and kept on following me and repeating over and over "I write grants" like a zombie repeats over and over "Brains!"
• Putting too much emotional weight into the conversation One time in my early 20s, I was out at this cigar bar that I still occasionally like to go to from time to time. And I always go up to the top floor because they have a chess set there, and I like to try to find people to play chess with me. So, I went there one time and I went up to the top floor and there was a bigger guy up there. And he and I started playing chess and at first it was. a pretty normal conversation. But he slowly revealed more and more his self-esteem issues and a kind of bitterness towards women for rejecting him. And I started having to walk on eggshells because I was afraid of hurting his feelings. He was like an open wound that I had to be very gentle with. It was kind of like a dynamic I had when I was in elementary school where no one wanted to be my friend, so when someone did, I would cling onto them too hard. I felt bad for him and felt empathy towards him, but it did put me off as he couldn't just talk to me like a regular person.
• Feigning concern as a means to get laid There have been a handful of times this has happened. When I was busking, I had a bunch of guys come up to me and ask me "Are you okay?" only to offer me money or a place to stay in exchange for sex. Another version of this was when this one guy that knew me and my then-boyfriend... and he was friends with my then-boyfriend. And I broke up with my bf, and he found me on campus and said "If you need a shoulder to cry on or someone to talk to, here's my number." And this guys was very obviously be opportunistic as he wasn't a very emotionally supportive person.
• Not taking no for an answer One time in college, I was going to walk back to my apartment from a party and it was just right down the street. This is right after I had broken up with my then-boyfriend and lots of guys I was acquainted with had caught wind of it and were trying to swoop in. There was this one guy who I had a lot of friends in common with, but that I hadn't personally met until that night. And it's not like we even talked or anything that night, I was literally just introduced. And I was going to go back to my apartment and this guy insisted on walking me home. And I kept telling him "No. I prefer to walk back alone." And he kept pushing and pushing and pushing and refused to let me walk back alone. So, I buckled and he walked back with me. And on the short walk there, he kept pressuring me and pressuring me and pressuring me to kiss him. And I kept refusing, and he kept badgering me. And then, he wanted to give me his number. And I said no a bunch of times. But I eventually put his number into my phone to get him to leave me alone.
• Comparing me to prettier girls to get me interested in him There was this one guy who used to ride my bus who used to talk a lot about this other girl to try to make me jealous. One time he said something like, "I used to like you but now I like her. So, I guess you're old news." But to me, he and I never had anything going on, and I was never interested in him. So, I found it kind of funny/creepy that he thought he could get to me like that. There was another instance when I was busking  where this older (creepy looking) guy in his 50s (I was 20) came up next to me while I was busking. And he was saying "Wow. You're just some hippie chick. I like that." and he kept repeating that over and over. Then, this beautiful woman (maybe my age or a little older) who was wearing a short skirt and had her hair and make-up done came out of the nearby bar. And this guy then starts comparing me to her like "Wow! She's really hot and you're just some hippie chick." and it was clear he was trying to win me over by getting me to feel a need to compare myself to the woman.

There are other examples of creepy behavior I've experienced over the years. But these are the ones that come to mind off-hand.

[Princess Arabia]

On 4/6/2024 at 5:41 PM, mmKay said:

The fux did I just watch. How does no one notice it's a dude. The end is hilarious though.

So many creeps

 

 

Any woman watching and reading this, just name a ridiculous price and they'll keep on going. That simple. Real hookers are safer from this type of harassment.  This happens a lot but not to hookers, only regular women who even pay these guys any mind. "Are you going to take care of me" "what do you mean" $1000. Oh OK, never mind. Some will think taking care of means doing it good, they'll say "sure, how do you like it". That's how ridiculous some men are. Thinking you're going to enjoy some random stranger off the street. Not saying women can't enjoy one night stands, but it really ever happens like this.

[Princess Arabia]

Creepy for me is way worse than some of what you guys stated, except for the hugging and touching inappropriately. I would describe them differently and use other words. Creepy for me is a guy playing with his dick in public or pulling it out. A guy sticking his tongue out and wiggling it like an ass as if he's performing cunnilingus. A guy coming up to me saying he's got a big dick do you want some. A guy coming up to me and grabbing my ass. A guy talking sexually explicitly to me and don't even know me or that just met me and i gave no inclinations of wanting to hear that. 

Maybe the guy that said, get used to me chasing you. That's also creepy. Even a guy you met and thought you liked, gave him your number and he's right off the bat sending you pictures of his private parts and asking you to do the same - this is even before you guys even got to know each other a bit - this never happened to me but it's something I'm thinking of that would be creepy. A guy that follows you around and just stares at you without saying anything. Stuff like this.

[mmKay]

@Princess Arabia Creepiness comes in a degree. From poor eye contact to borderline sexual assault 

@nhoktinvt learning game is creepy AF. But not learning game is even more creepy.  Hence that video

 

 

Edited April 8 by mmKay

[Princess Arabia]

15 minutes ago, mmKay said:

Creepiness comes in a degree. From poor eye contact to borderline sexual assault 

That's why I said "for me".

[Emerald]

2 hours ago, mmKay said:

@Princess Arabia Creepiness comes in a degree. From poor eye contact to borderline sexual assault 

To some degree that's true.

But I notice that a guy might be thinking a woman thinking he's creepy if she's just not interested and says no. And I can get why it would feel that way. But most of the time it's just a lack of interest and even annoyance at her flow being interrupted.

So, most women have been subject to genuine creepiness and aren't going to look at a guy who just isn't that good at small social cues as creepy unless he is going over other boundaries. They'll probably first just assume he's awkward or shy. 

That said, if it's cold approach then it may come off as creepy because of time and place being an inappropriate factor in conjunction with small awkwardnesses. To talk to a random woman in public (when it isn't a bar or club), it requires good social skills to still come off as normal.

[aurum]

Creepiness is about violation of autonomy, comfort and consent.

If fundamentally you respect all those things in a woman, then almost nothing you do will seem creepy. Alternatively, if you don't respect those things, then trying to mimic non-creepy behavior is still likely to fail.

Making the internal switch will help more than anything else if you struggle with creepiness.

Use examples to help program your mind with the right attitude, not to mimic.

Edited April 9 by aurum

[mmKay]

@aurum that is definitely a part of it but I'd argue the core of "creepiness" is  poor understanding, misunderstanding  and misinterpretation of social dynamics aka bad social skills. You can think you're being respectful but much of socialization is intention vs perception 

Not understanding social norms ( they depend on culture/context, not knowing how to " read the room" ), lack of self awareness ( how do you potentially come across to people, not understanding physical communication ( cues of discomfort, lack of reciprocity , consent , poor calibration, not understanding boundaries...) poor emotional intelligence 

So given the crucial role of social skills throughout evolution, back then but also nowadays if women sense a serious degree of any of this, it will feel creepy, not only because they personally don't feel comfortable but because their genetics pull the kill switch  on any potential attraction BY DESIGN , and scream " don't have offspring with this man!! , the child will have bad social skills !!

[numbersinarow]

(Speaking as a male.)

Having zero social skills and being sexually up-front out of nowhere after acting obnoxious or cold and not being friendly.

Oh and these same men have been absolutely loved by women.

[MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI]

On 4/7/2024 at 11:27 PM, Emerald said:

Here are some creepy behaviors that I've experienced from guys...

• Giving "friendly" hugs that are really an obvious excuse for copping a feel (there is one guy in particular from high school that I'm thinking of who used to be like "where's my hug"? And whenever he'd hug me or my female friends, he'd caress the sides of our waists by grasping his fingers around our sides in a tickling motion. I was in a very huggy friend-group, so we'd tended to hug a lot (guys and girls). But this particular guy was always trying to get really sexual with it.
• Saying "I would (date/fuck) you if you weren't so ____" I had one guy tell me me that he "would fuck me if it wasn't for the fact that I had such fucked up teeth". I also had another guy who said a similar thing... but it was "if your face wasn't so flat".
• Making inappropriate comments This has happened quite often. But one instance that comes to mind is when I was in college and busking in the pedestrian area near my school and this random middle aged man came and sat next to me while I was playing the guitar. And he just motioned his hands in front of his chest and said "You have really big boobs." I told him to stop and go away and with a pained look in his face he said, "I guess I'm just a small doses person then."
• Making threatening comments I was also busking one night and this man (maybe in his 50s) saw me there playing my guitar and he was making advances which I turned down. Then, he got really threatening and said "You better start getting used to running from me."
• Stating his requirements/likes about what he wants about a woman to a woman who hasn't expressed interest This sometimes is creepy and sometimes is just a red flag. I know it's happened to me before but I don't have a clear memory in my mind about it. But I usually see some version of it online where a guy is saying he wants a "submissive" woman. And as a woman who generally likes to have some elements of a more traditional man/woman pairing where the man is leading a bit more, it just gives off this icky immature vibe. 
• Following/stalking One time, I was walking back to my apartment from college and there was a guy that was on one of the last roads I had to turn down to get home. And he was clearly on something as he wasn't making much sense. He kept saying to me over and over "I write grants." I think he was trying to impress me by bragging about his job. But he was like a zombie and kept on following me and repeating over and over "I write grants" like a zombie repeats over and over "Brains!"
• Putting too much emotional weight into the conversation One time in my early 20s, I was out at this cigar bar that I still occasionally like to go to from time to time. And I always go up to the top floor because they have a chess set there, and I like to try to find people to play chess with me. So, I went there one time and I went up to the top floor and there was a bigger guy up there. And he and I started playing chess and at first it was. a pretty normal conversation. But he slowly revealed more and more his self-esteem issues and a kind of bitterness towards women for rejecting him. And I started having to walk on eggshells because I was afraid of hurting his feelings. He was like an open wound that I had to be very gentle with. It was kind of like a dynamic I had when I was in elementary school where no one wanted to be my friend, so when someone did, I would cling onto them too hard. I felt bad for him and felt empathy towards him, but it did put me off as he couldn't just talk to me like a regular person.
• Feigning concern as a means to get laid There have been a handful of times this has happened. When I was busking, I had a bunch of guys come up to me and ask me "Are you okay?" only to offer me money or a place to stay in exchange for sex. Another version of this was when this one guy that knew me and my then-boyfriend... and he was friends with my then-boyfriend. And I broke up with my bf, and he found me on campus and said "If you need a shoulder to cry on or someone to talk to, here's my number." And this guys was very obviously be opportunistic as he wasn't a very emotionally supportive person.
• Not taking no for an answer One time in college, I was going to walk back to my apartment from a party and it was just right down the street. This is right after I had broken up with my then-boyfriend and lots of guys I was acquainted with had caught wind of it and were trying to swoop in. There was this one guy who I had a lot of friends in common with, but that I hadn't personally met until that night. And it's not like we even talked or anything that night, I was literally just introduced. And I was going to go back to my apartment and this guy insisted on walking me home. And I kept telling him "No. I prefer to walk back alone." And he kept pushing and pushing and pushing and refused to let me walk back alone. So, I buckled and he walked back with me. And on the short walk there, he kept pressuring me and pressuring me and pressuring me to kiss him. And I kept refusing, and he kept badgering me. And then, he wanted to give me his number. And I said no a bunch of times. But I eventually put his number into my phone to get him to leave me alone.
• Comparing me to prettier girls to get me interested in him There was this one guy who used to ride my bus who used to talk a lot about this other girl to try to make me jealous. One time he said something like, "I used to like you but now I like her. So, I guess you're old news." But to me, he and I never had anything going on, and I was never interested in him. So, I found it kind of funny/creepy that he thought he could get to me like that. There was another instance when I was busking  where this older (creepy looking) guy in his 50s (I was 20) came up next to me while I was busking. And he was saying "Wow. You're just some hippie chick. I like that." and he kept repeating that over and over. Then, this beautiful woman (maybe my age or a little older) who was wearing a short skirt and had her hair and make-up done came out of the nearby bar. And this guy then starts comparing me to her like "Wow! She's really hot and you're just some hippie chick." and it was clear he was trying to win me over by getting me to feel a need to compare myself to the woman.

There are other examples of creepy behavior I've experienced over the years. But these are the ones that come to mind off-hand.

Very insightful! Thank you for this reply.

For clarification purposes can you explain what the word creepy is or can you provide a list of terms that help me to understand the word 'Creepy'?

Edited April 15 by MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI

[LambChop]

On 4/7/2024 at 11:27 PM, Emerald said:

Here are some creepy behaviors that I've experienced from guys...

• Giving "friendly" hugs that are really an obvious excuse for copping a feel (there is one guy in particular from high school that I'm thinking of who used to be like "where's my hug"? And whenever he'd hug me or my female friends, he'd caress the sides of our waists by grasping his fingers around our sides in a tickling motion. I was in a very huggy friend-group, so we'd tended to hug a lot (guys and girls). But this particular guy was always trying to get really sexual with it.
• Saying "I would (date/fuck) you if you weren't so ____" I had one guy tell me me that he "would fuck me if it wasn't for the fact that I had such fucked up teeth". I also had another guy who said a similar thing... but it was "if your face wasn't so flat".
• Making inappropriate comments This has happened quite often. But one instance that comes to mind is when I was in college and busking in the pedestrian area near my school and this random middle aged man came and sat next to me while I was playing the guitar. And he just motioned his hands in front of his chest and said "You have really big boobs." I told him to stop and go away and with a pained look in his face he said, "I guess I'm just a small doses person then."
• Making threatening comments I was also busking one night and this man (maybe in his 50s) saw me there playing my guitar and he was making advances which I turned down. Then, he got really threatening and said "You better start getting used to running from me."
• Stating his requirements/likes about what he wants about a woman to a woman who hasn't expressed interest This sometimes is creepy and sometimes is just a red flag. I know it's happened to me before but I don't have a clear memory in my mind about it. But I usually see some version of it online where a guy is saying he wants a "submissive" woman. And as a woman who generally likes to have some elements of a more traditional man/woman pairing where the man is leading a bit more, it just gives off this icky immature vibe. 
• Following/stalking One time, I was walking back to my apartment from college and there was a guy that was on one of the last roads I had to turn down to get home. And he was clearly on something as he wasn't making much sense. He kept saying to me over and over "I write grants." I think he was trying to impress me by bragging about his job. But he was like a zombie and kept on following me and repeating over and over "I write grants" like a zombie repeats over and over "Brains!"
• Putting too much emotional weight into the conversation One time in my early 20s, I was out at this cigar bar that I still occasionally like to go to from time to time. And I always go up to the top floor because they have a chess set there, and I like to try to find people to play chess with me. So, I went there one time and I went up to the top floor and there was a bigger guy up there. And he and I started playing chess and at first it was. a pretty normal conversation. But he slowly revealed more and more his self-esteem issues and a kind of bitterness towards women for rejecting him. And I started having to walk on eggshells because I was afraid of hurting his feelings. He was like an open wound that I had to be very gentle with. It was kind of like a dynamic I had when I was in elementary school where no one wanted to be my friend, so when someone did, I would cling onto them too hard. I felt bad for him and felt empathy towards him, but it did put me off as he couldn't just talk to me like a regular person.
• Feigning concern as a means to get laid There have been a handful of times this has happened. When I was busking, I had a bunch of guys come up to me and ask me "Are you okay?" only to offer me money or a place to stay in exchange for sex. Another version of this was when this one guy that knew me and my then-boyfriend... and he was friends with my then-boyfriend. And I broke up with my bf, and he found me on campus and said "If you need a shoulder to cry on or someone to talk to, here's my number." And this guys was very obviously be opportunistic as he wasn't a very emotionally supportive person.
• Not taking no for an answer One time in college, I was going to walk back to my apartment from a party and it was just right down the street. This is right after I had broken up with my then-boyfriend and lots of guys I was acquainted with had caught wind of it and were trying to swoop in. There was this one guy who I had a lot of friends in common with, but that I hadn't personally met until that night. And it's not like we even talked or anything that night, I was literally just introduced. And I was going to go back to my apartment and this guy insisted on walking me home. And I kept telling him "No. I prefer to walk back alone." And he kept pushing and pushing and pushing and refused to let me walk back alone. So, I buckled and he walked back with me. And on the short walk there, he kept pressuring me and pressuring me and pressuring me to kiss him. And I kept refusing, and he kept badgering me. And then, he wanted to give me his number. And I said no a bunch of times. But I eventually put his number into my phone to get him to leave me alone.
• Comparing me to prettier girls to get me interested in him There was this one guy who used to ride my bus who used to talk a lot about this other girl to try to make me jealous. One time he said something like, "I used to like you but now I like her. So, I guess you're old news." But to me, he and I never had anything going on, and I was never interested in him. So, I found it kind of funny/creepy that he thought he could get to me like that. There was another instance when I was busking  where this older (creepy looking) guy in his 50s (I was 20) came up next to me while I was busking. And he was saying "Wow. You're just some hippie chick. I like that." and he kept repeating that over and over. Then, this beautiful woman (maybe my age or a little older) who was wearing a short skirt and had her hair and make-up done came out of the nearby bar. And this guy then starts comparing me to her like "Wow! She's really hot and you're just some hippie chick." and it was clear he was trying to win me over by getting me to feel a need to compare myself to the woman.

There are other examples of creepy behavior I've experienced over the years. But these are the ones that come to mind off-hand.

I agree with all of this. I've had experiences very similar to yours. 

I think, aside from the obvious ones like stalking or making sexual comments, feigning concern is something that really creeps me out. It easily leads into a conversation that leaves me feeling kind of vulnerable and awkward. even if, you probably don't want to mess with a woman who is super keen on opening up about her life problems to strangers. 

Men who keep the cold-approach convo lighthearted and level-headed seem more charming to me in my opinion. They're also the same type who don't act weird after I tell them I have a boyfriend, and they just move on kindly. It's quite pleasant!