youngshinzen
Member-
Content count
613 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Posts posted by youngshinzen
-
-
@How to be wise In the first few sentences in The Power Of Now he talks about being depressed since his early childhood. That day when he disidentified with his "self", he had even more emotional and physical pain than ever, which shows the connection between enlightenment and suffering. It's a sudden change of brain activity, going from the most powerful self-blame to complete innocence.
That happened to me too. But I just became aware of infinite determinism, which implies a lot of good stuff regarding insights, but I'm still in ego mode.
Maybe because he was 29 when it happened and I was 22... Damn, only 7 years more left in hell
-
@Alex K If it does not get better with using techniques, you should try to get some psychedelics. There will be a huge gap between the experience and your everyday life, which creates a tension between the two. I just had one trip 4 years ago and it still motivates me to a very high degree.
-
@Fredrik Andersson There's evolution and then there's spirituality. Do you want to serve the first or the latter?
-
@Joseph Maynor Who has mentioned a "need to know"?
Edit: Even after your edit, I still don't get it.
-
@How to be wise I don't know. Depends on the definition of a sleep state, maybe it's a fluent transition, in that case we're not sleeping, nor being awake. Why?
-
@Captain Flint You should not take my example literal, the kid just represents simplicity of thinking and a minor treasury of words. Leo basically talks about infinity, nothingness and experience. Maybe it's like a puzzle, the "kid" and Leo both completed it, but the kid had one with less pieces and Leo with a lot more. The core of my question was: Is the level of satisfaction the same? And if communicated, could the kid achieve the same effect on the audience?
-
So I have a question and an idea that came up while listening to Leo's "Everything Understood" Video, maybe he can answer to these.
1. Could it be that deep knowledge about reality is not necessary to have the same level of insight as Leo had? Let's say a 10 year old kid, has just learned about basic mathematics/physics and took a substance. Leo and the kid are thinking with the same speed and clarity now. Then we put that kid in front of the camera. Would we "learn" just as much as if we watched Leos video?
2. Idea: Leo talks about the importance of thinking about the essence of reality every moment. Could it be that -feeling the body- for example, produces a fear and fear just means, something that's not understood entirely? So it is natural for every conscious creature to have the desire to understand this experience, because it's fear driven. It's like a tornado, some will be more off center and search for peace in more indirect things, some will get to the bottom, but basically it's one force.
-
@Nahm Thank you. I'm already noticing how that answer changed me.
-
Info:
- I'm currently writing an essay and started drinking caffeine again after 3 months.
- I've been obsessed with the thought of doing psychedelics in the last few days, haven't done any yet, just read a few reports and so on.
- I've been meditating daily for almost a year now.
So after a few hours of writing I got tired, went to bed and slept for 3 hours. In my dream, I had the exact same situation:
(dream is in italic script)
I knew I drank two red bull, I layed in my bed and wanted to sleep, but I couldn't. I rolled on my side, closed my eyes and saw the darkness behind my eyelids. I became aware of the fact that even when I close my eyes and I'm alone, I have a thought running which is basically a self image of me lying in bed with closed eyes (huge insight, I checked this when I was awake and it's the most subtle ego thought ever). I suddenly felt how the feeling of my body melted across the bed, down to the floor, like slime. My thoughts were: "Holy shit, it's happening, everything I heard Leo talk about and the trip reports I read, it's happening to me right now!" I knew I was going to "die" and stop existing (felt more like becoming infinite nothingness...). I became anxious and started focusing on my breath to bring my awareness back to the body, which worked. I then reached for my phone to call an ambulance cause I knew something was really wrong mentally, but realized it's not my phone, ran outside to search for help and so on...
Then I woke up and I knew even though it was a dream, it was the most intense experience of my life. The more time passed, the more I forgot how it was, but I'm not going to forget the importance of the initial thought of it being intense. I know these words won't give any of you the feeling of this, but holy shit I'll wait with tripping for a while now...
The other thing is the insight I got. It's like all these subtle thoughts of us being in the body and what we are, hold us back from being open. The ego is working all the time and we're only little aware of it, but the more alert we become, we start to see these small sneaky thoughts and realize that this is not actually us. By that we can erase the boundaries and really start to connect with people.
(I realized Im saying the same shit everyone else says
But it's not words for me anymore, there are mental pictures now linked to the experience in the dream, which partially completes the knowledge about it.)
-
@Geog Haha that's really messed up that you have to meditate to not be aware of your breath:D But I have done a few months of solely breathing meditation too and focused on it automatically during the day.
Try "chaotic breathing" (Elliott Hulse) whenever you feel anxious about it, that will help to lose control and become more relaxed.
-
@Nahm I feel like it's a long way to get to where you are on a being level, but let me start by telling you what I became aware of:
1. I was intimidated by the amount of words you wrote.
2. I thought, wow that's a really cool guy, he's embodying this to the fullest!
3. Wait...what if he just...
4. Copied a part of your answer, pasted it in google to check if you already wrote that to someone else.
5. Feeling guilty for being so skeptical...
6. Nothing relevant came up, realized I had to put it in quotation marks to get the exact same text.
7. It was hard to edit the marks with my iPhone, had to play around a lot with the magnifying glass to get the marks on the right position.
8. Nothing found. I was certain posts from this forum are available on google, but maybe it won't show up there, so I tried to search it directly on this forum.
9. A huge list of "maybe you were looking for "first word" or "second word" or ...
10. I was reading the list with Leos voice, actually thinking he made it right that second. Which is infinitely stupid...
11. Read your answer again, became more aware of how specific it was.
12. Then I was even more greatful then before, but to even this feeling out I thought, it's just a brain and electric signals typing words nonstop. Again feeling guilty for not letting you be superior in my imagination?
Crazy to see the amount of shit I think, thanks! ?
I'll focus more on those negativ thoughts from the past. It really feels like I'm always wearing this heavy coat, packed with things I've done "wrong". When I think of my face it's like it's made out of crumbling clay. Can you recommend any techniques from your experience to feel fresh and free again?
And I'm much younger than my profil says? And already wanting to cease to exist?
-
@MsNobody That really inspired me, especially the part with nature being a teacher. That's something Wim Hof talks about a lot, but he tends to repeat the same phrases over and over again, which gives me the feeling of him being too unconscious while talking. But hearing this from you or a source of higher thinking is much more acceptable for me :-) Thanks for sharing!
-
@Nahm I think that it´s an accumulation of suppressed negative emotions from the past, but the core might be fearing death, which should partially dissolve having ego death experiences with psychedelics.
I have been meditating almost daily for a year now, but I´m stuck in the concept of determinism and still feeling like an entity, which also leads to a cognitive dissonance.
Yes, I´m looking forward to participate in retreats, but I am really enthusiastic when it comes to psychedelics due to my intense hash experience, so this is something I´m thinking about every day. But I´m judging people who try to find peace with external things like relationships, partying, talking... And now I see myself in that position, maybe on a more conscious level, but the mechanic is the same, isn`t it? I would tell "those people" to first become content themselves and then strive for these external things. So should I wait until its indifferent to me to use psychedelics or is it ok to have a mostly negative emotion (mixed with curiosity and excitement also) as a catalyst?
-
I am longing for a spiritual experience.
I`ve had three before: one near death experience, a hash-cookie and realized I´m very sensitive to those (9 hour trip to realizing infinity) and a deep insight of determinism and no free will after a long depression.
Today I have realized more than ever that I want my friends to have spiritual experiences, through long meditation or drugs, just to satisfy my longing for it. I sat down and became aware of what I felt. I was hungry and felt an inner vacuum, which is nothing new to me. But the fact is, that this seems to be my motivation to have a peak experience. So the question is: Should I find ways to realize a strong spiritual experience or should I face this emotion more often?
But there might also be the option, that this feeling (fear) can be reduced through taking a substance and it might end the vicious cycle.
What are your opinions and experiences?
in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Posted · Edited by youngshinzen
equal rights
@Nahm I ask because I had a 9 hour long trip (thinking non-stop in causal chains) when I ate a hash-cookie 3 years ago.
The only things I remembered is that:
When that last insight came to me, I opened my eyes and everything was understood. After 9 hours of ultra rapid thinking, the thoughts just stopped.
Now the most interesting thing is: at that point I was not interested in religion, philosophy, physics, biology, nor did I know about spirituality. Let alone enlightenment. Now how can my experience be so congruent if it's unique?
I've used the "kid-example" to represent a state of mind without knowledge. Could it be that everyone of us has the absolute answers within him/her?