Mario

My family is bringing me to a neuropsychiatrist , that says that this channel is bullshit and that this is ruining my mental health. Now , i've watched too many leo's videos at once and i'm starting to recognize that i'm disasociating from reality because of confusion . I don't know if i should follow self development in the years to come ( my parents are planning to block this site from my computer ) or if this is just bullshit and i'm gonna become mad if i continue. I need your perspective , what should i do?

Is it okay if i continue ( meditation ) stage 3 of " how to meditate deeper " or should i start other lighter practices ? Even though I'm having some results ( and the "rules" say that i should do it for at least 30 straight ) i don't know if i'm bypassing and i should practice other "superficial" methods... Also , i'm a teen so is it okay if i start to heal my traumas right now?

Well , i'll have to rely only of the internet for my pitfalls for at least another 4 years

Can you find good teachers on the internet? Like you contact them / their temple and you take an appointment ( i'm talking like they're doctors ? )

I'm from Italy so you can call me pasta pizza and mandolino ?. Sorry if my posts can be obvious but i have a crippling fear that the things that i see on my computer will damage me because i have no guidance I hope that my posts are valid and they're not a waste of time.

I started studying self-development 3 months ago. Until now i haven't missed a week of Leo's videos. I'm young and my mind is quite flexible and i'm starting to recognize that Actualized.org is becoming an obsession and i felt different from the world around me. I've tried to take distance from it ( while still considering it a good source of information ) but thoughts and thoughts of hopelessness kept coming in my mind. I thought that it would be beneficial to talk to someone. I talked to a techer and she's kind of knowledgeable. She reccomended me to talk to a priest about it and doing discernment ( if it doesn't make sense in English it means judging and verifying morals and intellectual concepts that i , alone , can't do ) and she gave me a book of Anthony de mello. By talking to the priest i don't think that it will be fully beneficial because he will not probably 100% comprehend these concepts ( altough if he could listen to English it would habe been no problem ). I' ve started to read the book and the first few pages were practically the same as some Actualized.org concepts. I can see that spiritual concepts regard always always a little bit of non-attachment and that i'm not really taking distance from Actualized.org . So , with that being said, is my "obsession with non-attachment" a natural and healthy consequence and , if not , do you have any other spiritual practice that has not concepts of non-attachment that has brought you happiness and peace that you can share with me ?

Ok , by letting out my thoughts i just realized that i'm procrastinating by dwelling on what i can't control. Btw can someone give me some certainties about this work and how it has affected your life? Sometimes it's hard to ignore confusion and just work . I often worry that actualized.org is just a fraud

Ok... but in 3 to 4 years i'll have to enter in the job market . I mean... i could pick a job and earn money to buy books and courses but it would be far better if i had kind of figured out what i want to do right now that i have more free time . I don't know even if i can earn money right now because of how suspicious my parents have become The school system in Italy doesn't allow it and there are no decent libraries in my town

Fifteen. I can't buy anything . Furthermore i wrote another post in relationships where i explain how the situation is evolving

Sorry i wrote another post similar to this . You can reply if you want to

I'm fifteen and my parents have crippling fears about self-actualization work . I tried to convince them but it didn't work very well and i asked (naively ) to a family friend to help me persuade them . She said that this work could bring me to suicide because i'm too young and imprudent . Now I fear this work too and i can't buy Leo's books nore the life purpose course wich i was so optimistic about. I've acknowleged that trying to convince my parents to buy these things right now is useless and i need to be more prudent and cautious with this work. Furthermore my parents are extremely aware of any unusual behaviors such as sadness and i'm scared that they could take my internet. I know that this goes against integrity but i need to know the most subtle and prudent ways i can approach this work right now ( apart from meditation and yoga )

My family , friends don't appreciate my efforts in self-actualization. They are afraid that this work is going to bring me to loneliness , depression ando so on.. Yesterday my Dad took my wi-fi and if i continue with this work and don't obey to him he's going to beat me up . It's like a piece of me was robbed and I don't know what to do. I was so optimistic about this work. I thought that if i continued i could have a happier life in the long run. I mean , i can continue meditating and i've got still some internet on my phone , but i can't buy books , take notes and learn (or at least i can do it secretely ) . I feel trapped abd very misunderstood , please tellmme something to get out of this mud

Ok, so i should just be patient and work?

So , a lot of newbies when doing meditation face this problem of not knowing how to not control their breaths . Fornunately i've kind of learned how to not control it trough observing how the air passes trough my nostrils . The problem is that when doing concentration with a particular sensations that is not my breath , i usually put my concentration on my breath too. I've tried to concentrate just on my breath but i tend to control it more easily , since my mind needs to be like a laser. How can i not control my breath more easily or ,at least, how do i eliminate my obsession with my breath during concentration ?

So, the fact that i'm ashamed by the fact that i judge others or/ and the fact that i felt humiliated shows that i don't love myself ? (If Leo or other topics explain this you don' t have to reply)