SOUL

People tend to think of it as an absolute, either there is free will or there isn't. I recognize how there is both in my consciousness.

I never really used that word for it but I am on that path spiritually. Although there definitely is some thick ironic paradox all over self taught enlightenment. We can use different methods for different areas of our life, one area may be more "auto" than another, some may be very formal in the learning process while another not at all. There is something to be said for having someone or something give insights and specialized understanding that may take much longer to find on our own if we find them at all. There is also something to be said for the process of discovering something intuitively and through our own natural process that makes the insight or revelation much more valuable to us.

Fine, don't change then. I bet you can't not change. I dare you to not change. Go ahead, triple dog dare.

Enlightenment is like a light...hence why it's referred to as enlightenment. It;s a light for our consciousness. What is this consciousness light useful to illuminate? Anything and everything. You have already been accessing the consciousness light pretty effectively if you have done all those types of meditate work. It doesn't have to mystified or be made esoteric, it's an innate part of our consciousness if we are simply aware of it.

Have you had your contemplator calibrated by a certified technician lately? It might be out of alignment and your insights will be skewed. Just kidding, some subjects are just more of a challenge to acquire insights on than others. Keep contemplating, sounds like you are doing something that works for you, the illumination process can be quite abstract sometimes.

Our intuition is just a means the self has to deliver us information, the ego is another one those means. It's up to us to contemplate the information we receive by all means to assess if it's of value to the moment. If we contemplate the input we can see the hallmarks from the method it came to us and ego naturally will frame it in our identity.

Fixed it for you, you're welcome.

@Barna Simply put, the desiring for something can be a source of discontent even if it's for "enlightenment". In some ways it's like game theory. Video games have many levels and there are rewards associated with each level. If the game has 100 levels and I'm on level 2 I cannot attain the level 100 rewards, I need to get to so be on that level to get those rewards. Just getting a glimpse of the level doesn't allow me to attain the rewards of that level. So, spiritually speaking, spending so much time trying to get glimpses of a level I'm not on only slows my progress in getting to that level. Every day I work on raising my level then when I get to it I am on that level and can attain the rewards of it. So, I look to the now and raise the awareness of the moment and what level or what states will take care of itself in due time. The glimpses are exciting and can inspire but can also distract from immediate inner work to be done in the moment right now that will lead us to those higher levels of illumination. Or use the "cheat code" to be there right now.... Do you know the code? It's that we are already on every level but the ego just doesn't want to know it so distracts us. Ironic, isn't it? You may wonder if I know the cheat code why aren't i always at the higher levels? Complicated life can make the "infinitely enlightened being" lose their keys... or crash the car....or not get the bills paid. It would be amazing to have such a simple life that sustaining the body wasn't a distraction from enlightenment and both could be done simultaneously. I'm working on making it that simple.

...um... ok.

@Barna As cliche as it sounds, as soon as I attained my initial goal it was then I realized the journey really has no beginning or end, it just is. So the "end goal" is something I had all along the way, I just didn't notice I had it because of all the other stuff cluttering my consciousness. There is no way to retroactively go back and tell my miserable self that I already have it but don't know it and I'm not sure my miserable self would have believed it anyway, it may be just part of the process.

I agree with nearly everything you said except....... enlightenment isn't rare. It's a very common thing but it is often overlooked and we fail to notice it because we are looking for the esoteric, deep "thing" we are told, so think is enlightenment. Every day everyone has an enlightenment moment but then the phone rings, the dog barks, the kid cries, the boss yells, we distract ourselves with anything and everything or our own ego goes 'Hey look at me! Me me mememe loooook at mmeeeeeeeeee!!!!!' We miss the simple enlightenment in the moment so instead of amplify it throughout our being and let it echo through our life it gets lost in our junk drawer.

@Barna It started because I "woke up" to myself as a miserable preteen just wanted to be happy and I was about 13ish when I started to meditate. It took more than a decade to achieve the goal even though along the way the words evolved from "happy" to "at peace and in joy".

@Shin I tend to gravitate towards the simple as well and it works so I don't complicate it. The K.I.S.S. method... keep it simple seeker!

Well, I don't know what "the basic" is, I know what my basic is. Mostly focusing on the breath, I will also incorporate visualizations if I'm intending to create or change a mindset but still breath is part of that. Let's say I'm out doing tasks and I'm losing my peaceful center I will take a moment to quiet the mind by focusing on breath. I will also simultaneously visualize me breathing in tranquility and breathing out anxiousness. I even have kind of a funny one for when my ego has whipped the monkey mind into a frenzy and it doesn't want to settle down. I will visualize the observer, petting the ego as if it's a dog to comfort it. It works surprisingly well, the ego gets the attention it craves so it settles down and my mind gets quieted. Then as it sleeps at my "feet" I can do my inner work. Haven't used that in awhile though, the ego is better trained now...haha I would recommend to just find what works for you in both practice and with whatever symbols, images or concepts you connect with., then employ them with your inner work. What works for me may not work for you and you won't learn which does for you until you examine your own self conscious and stretch the meditative muscle in every way you can.

I may not have reached the highest state, I have attained what I have and i have no basis for comparison. I use just basic meditative practices, nothing intricate or exotic. The practices aren't the key, it's the actual inner work we do. I don't have many labels for what I experience, I have tried to equate it to some of the words on ideas people use for the different things I hear from them but I don't know if they really do. So pardon me for my vagueness. Any chance you can find, clear and focus the mind on the now in a small meditation moment. It doesn't matter where and it doesn't have to last long. in the shower, standing in line at the store, waiting for a stop light to change even on the toilet. Anytime the mind would normally wander off and churn around on the tedium of life, instead use the moment to meditate. This will bring a heightened illuminated state to normal daily life, as I did this I found that my overall more awakened state stayed with me through more complicated tasks. It also allowed me to meditate deeper and deeper. It is a challenge to focus on the moment while our brain is needed for normal life tasks so this illuminated state fluctuates through the day depending on how much my mind has to focus on a task. Tasks that are well practiced behavior and the subconscious mind can do it so I pretty much run on "auto pilot" so allows for a heightened state to be maintained. Obviously when the task involves the safety of yourself and others like operating dangerous equipment or driving those heightened states can limit the ability to accomplish the task safely so the mind should be attuned to the task. Although I will admit there were some long road trips across vast empty distances that I had some incredible meditative moments....but i wouldn't suggest it.

The reason I intentionally keep my life simple is so I can stay in a more illuminated state of being. When life is complicated and we are rushing around with lots of complicated tasks to complete staying in fully illuminated states is a challenge. Bringing some of the illuminated state with me into typical life routines is what I seek to do.

I don't claim to be "enlightened", I am at peace and live in joy. Through mediation and contemplation I observe and know the nature of existence, even the conditions and state of existence that gave rise to the manifest universe that we are in. So whatever that is, I am. I can say this much, to get to the most illuminated states of consciousness where existence reveals itself, then first be at peace and in joy. Living every day life with a seed of those illuminated sates of consciousness at the core of our awareness will allow someone to function in the world, being fully immersed in those illuminated states of consciousness and attempting to live a typical human existence in this day and age is a challenge.

When drumming at a drum circle I have found a well timed howl kicks up the intensity a notch and can set off e frenzy that creates a literal buzz in the air.

Well, it sounds like you have some powerful inner work happening. Although, I think you may be ready to allow yourself to appreciate the positive input that comes your way, that doesn't mean to build yourself around it or "need it" but it's ok to share in a positive way with others.

I live a very simple life and enjoy it. I intentionally arrange it that way. As soon as it's not working for me I will do what I can to change it to what does. While still enjoying the trip. What are you seeking? That will answer your unasked question

@LRyan People tend to seek out an "evil". They want to place blame, find fault, call it bad and wrong, it's false. not real and use it as a reason why they aren't what they think they aught to be. It's the mind still being gripped by dualism. There will always be a scapegoat found in that mindset that must be defeated for everything to be "good", right, true, real and will be the reason why they can be what they think they aught to be. The problem is there will always another scapegoat that mindset will find. Releasing that mindset is stepping away from the war in ourselves and a step towards inner peace if that's what you seek for your life. Just don't make it another scapegoat in the process....release it without using it's vices to justify it is a challenge. hehe

Is there any living other than now? Maybe it's that you just are intimately aware of it.....now. Embrace it!

When it happens, it will be now and I may still be to experience it.

It seems like you spend quite a bit of time and energy questioning others of their personal methods. Much can be learned from asking questions and critical thinking can be a benefit of skepticism, although, doubt can be a detriment of it.

I prefer the word solitude, alone sounds like wanting to be with others but denied it, solitude sounds more like intentionally being there. Something as simple as a slight shift in a seemingly insignificant way can wind up being a very impacting change.