Vytas

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About Vytas

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  1. I also felt that. Its like in actuality he is trying to drill the truths to himself, because subconscious part of him doubts it
  2. Myke Tyson got so much more humble over the years, he is definitely becoming aware of his ego. What a hero.
  3. And btw, this video (link below) captures nicely the theme of your journal. Keep up the good work man
  4. I find him very helpful on the path. If you resonate with what he says/does then follow the sadhana and see how your being changes in a month
  5. I find the app very helpful. Almost done with 10 basic lessons and thinking about purchasing annual subscription
  6. @Gabriel Antonio Thanks for advice. Yeah, I definitely realized that I am not ready for it. My mind is too much of a worrying-type. But I was kind of okay with my mind being stressed, I was prepared to meditate and let go. The problem was that I wasn't prepared for 67+h trip (still dizzy). I mean I had lots of work planned for the days after. Anyways, its been now 67h after smoking and I can finally drive and do stuff in a manageble manner So good to be back into my body again to some extent. Its like 90-95% normal now. Two things to take away from this experience: Thc has 3-4 days half life, so if it is very potent - prepare to be stoned for half a week, and have no work planned. Some bodies have hard time metabolizing it. Yesterday i ate yogurt at breakfast and thats all. I have been fasting now for ~26h just because my digestion process stopped and food is stuck with thc in the body. Case closed i guess Weed is just not for my body type
  7. Chronological order: +0h: feeling great, we walked outside with brother, discussing about life and what not. +0.5h it kics in - disorientation - like I do everything very coordinated if you look from aside but from my point of view I just can't locate where my body is in space very well. Also little anxiety +1h First peak. Anxiety intensifies as I have to encounter parents. Not fun. Much paranoia, praying that this would end. +4h. Peak fades as I can again locate my body parts in space and monkey mind slows down. An iety disappears. Only light symptoms. I go to sleep. +13h I wake up. I still feel light symptoms. Also dry eyes and mouth but nothing too worrying. +13-+21h. I go about my day. +21h. Just as I thought it ended - nope. Second wave. It happened as I eas walking for my 3rd hour outside and suddenly time slowed down and snap my body - I didnt know where my arms were (at that moment they were in my jean's pockets. This middiocer-intensity "high" lasted all evening. It was tough as I had to do lots of stuff in city and home. +29h. I went to sleep hoping that this 2nd wave will pass. I had lots of work and driving planned for next day. +38h. Morning - high didnt went away, but wa smanageble. I got used to not feeling where my arms were, I did alright with all the work I had to do. +44h. I thought why not to go running, maybe it will sober me up, plus I was tired an dnjmb, and thought blood circulation might help me get alert. +45h. During the run itself (7km) I was feeling good, felt grounded. But then, after showering oh boy. +46h 2nd peak. I felt dizzy. Lost. Anxious. Parents ask me why I am not doing my duties at home. Man, I wish I could be honest and tell them I smoked weed (they dont look at it very happily...). +48h I was sitting numb and tired and high and anxious. Thinking about wtf is wrong with my body, when my brother told a joke and I just bursted into laughing. To the point of tears. Lol. Now its almost +50hours. Fuck. Its like I can't do shit and I have work. Ehh. I am thinking about telling my parents I am feeling like meditating thus evening. So I can just ease into experience. Hope it will pass soon. But who knows, I mean its +50h now. P.S if you are wandering my first marijuana experience lasted 21h, but it was heavier weed. This time I inhaled only for 2-3 times only.
  8. Before this I thought weed isint harmful, but shit... Is my body different? It is my second time i smoked it, the first was half a year ago and it was weird as well (simmilar sympthoms as now just to lower extent). I smoked weed and it was alright a lot of anxiety because of how my mind works, lots of paranoia - nothing too suspicious. Everything past after 6-12 hours expect!!! Expect that its been 46-48hours and my hands still feel weird - dizzy, disoriented and extra sensitive. For example if I thouch my face I dont know where I touched and exact texture of my face just hyper-tingly sensation. Its really hard when I need to tigh my shoes or do some persice work with my hands. I thoufht this will pass, but its been ~47hours now! Maybe some of know why this is happening and what it is?
  9. Also the video I did: https://vimeo.com/302458457 I know very poorly filmed, but that is what I've got
  10. ***This was my second attempt, I haven't posted my first one, because it was as much scientific as this one. Maybe I will share it that one as well later. Out of curiosity I did this experiment and this is what happened Process: 1) Preparation. I started the experiment on 2018.11.07 (Wednesday). I tried to do everything as precise as I could. I took 3 identical* jars, washed them really well, waited them to dry, then cleaned with 3 separate clean paper towels (picture a.). On the covers wrote 'Love', 'Hate' and 'Ignore'. Then I boiled some rice. I don't have scales, so the only way to place exact amount of rice in each jar was with a tool. And the tool was sort of a metal scoop. So I placed 2 coops of rice in each jar and closed them. Placed them on top of the shelf and covered with wardrobe curtain. The reason I pulled the curtain was that during the experiment I wanted to absolutely not even look who must be ignored, but if I place one jar in the closet and not the rest of them, the amount of light they receive would be different. So I placed all of them behind the curtain and started the experiment (picture b.). * - the only difference was that on one white cover it had date - 2014, I couldn't wash the it away. But thought this should not make any difference for the experiment. 2) Execution. Every day I would open enough curtain, so that 'ignore' jar would still be ignored, while I spend around two minutes for the rest two. One minute I would look at 'love' jar and send loving thoughts and emotions to those rice. Another minute I would look at 'hate' jar and send negative thoughts and emotions to those rices. 3) During second week. After sending thoughts of love to the 'love' jar, it was very hard to then almost bully and hate the 'hate' rice. Therefore, I would spend less than 10-15 seconds for the hate jar. 4) End of experiment - 2018.11.23. I couldn't wait longer for results (initially planed to do this for 3 weeks) and after 16 days I ended the experiment. picture a. picture b. Results: Things that I observed: (due to lack of space, I will post pictures of results in the post below) Condensation and moisture: loved jar was the least moist, actually no drops of water on the glass. Meanwhile the other two were condensed. Also 'hate' and 'ignore' jars had more moisture, rice was laying on this gelatinous-like bottom. Color: all rice was quite similar in this regard. Perhaps hated rice was more of a darker-orange color and ignored rice was more of a darker-grey color. Specific differences: 'love' rice didn't had any special defect. While 'hate' rice had very dark (pure black) spot on one of the areas. Also 'ignore' rice had this spot of greenish mold. Moreover, It seemed to me that loved rice had least bad smell, although I wasn't paying that much attention to the smell. Position: because I wasn't rotating the jars, I was only able to send either hate or love towards one side of rice. What is interesting, for some unknown reason, the black spot in 'hate' jar appeared on the other side than I was perceiving, meaning I couldn't see it during the whole experiment. Maybe: the only mistake of this experiment might be that I MAYBE closed the jars not equally strongly. I can't think of any other reason why in love jar the condensation disappeared during 3-7th day. Conclusion: Very interesting phenomena I observed. Ignored and hated rice had two very distinct and different defects - one having mold and the other black spot. Between all of 3 jars, loved rice were looking slightly better. This was one experiment and I shouldn't draw any conclusions from it, more experiments are needed to be done before making any judgment, BUT. But if this is what is seems to me, then love is truly truly powerful. One should be very mindful of the thought and emotion process, because mental manifestation may impact the physical world, or. Or perhaps even more important to have open-mind because no matter what we think, nature is so complex that it seems we don't know anything yet. The best thing of this experiment that I have got opportunity to witness such thing first hand for myself. One thing is when you look this woo-woo things on youtube, the other thing is when you do it yourself. Very eye opening results. *** Consideration for myself when doing such experiment again: make sure I close all jars very very well. put only one scoop of rice send love or hate thoughts and emotions to all sides of rice, instead of one add 'normal' jar, to which I would look for 1 minute, therefore I would know if there is any difference between ignorance and paying silent attention. Final Note: It would be nice that you guys could also do some similar experiment for yourself and share it here so we could see if thoughts and emotions can affect the world or not for sure
  11. All of the lil peeps pumps and other dudes like xxx took orange to its extreme. Materialism which brings depression, madness and desperaty
  12. @ajasatya thanks. Yeah I feel like some sort of outlet/ tool is needed. Some say that running has done that for them, others that interacting face to face with family members and friends more often. I can see the benefits of hatha yoga. Disturbances in dopamine levels do actually cause not only mental but also physical unease. I will add surya namaskar and some form of pranayama exercise to my routine and will reach for 60+ days
  13. @ajasatya I am wondering how long one must go till urges subside. At least in my last attempt from day 30 to day 33 the thought patterns and my energy levels were so f***ed up that I couldn't bear it. How long it took you for your mind to calm down and dopamine levels equalize?
  14. It is siad that passion cycles go every two weeks. According to my observations it is more or less true. First week was hard. Then 2nd and 3rd was relatively easy. Currenty in the 4rth week and its hard as hell. Lust came back. Have horny dreams and thougths. Damn. Still staying strong. Try to witness dreams without indulging in them. Also some physical work helps to stay sane. Lets do this! I am the master of the body, not a slave! It is time to regain the freedom of choice good luck to all