Matiyos

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About Matiyos

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    Poland, Bydgoszcz
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  1. Thanks everyone for your replies @consept It's funny, I feel like I know in my heart everything you wrote but in a way I needed to read this and remind myself of that. I've had some experience with PUA in the past and I know for sure it's not something I'm interested with right now. On the other hand I also read Way of superior man and now as I recall it's content it also helps me get some distance to this entire situation. Thanks for your input. Also regarding India, for sure there are lot of things I haven't got over yet, the point of this travel would be to get into enviroment where my growth would accelerate and I could get over some of those things faster. I feel like I'm too immersed in everyday regular life, hence I forget about all those concepts from books etc.
  2. Hey, recently I've bumped into this video in which a yogi talks about negative impact of tattoos on your bodys energies. Do you have any thoughts on this, ever heard anything similar from another sources?
  3. @aurum What I'm looking for from going to ashram is to completly change my lifestyle, make meditation and yoga my primary direction in life, hoping to attain more control over my mind, and hopefully find a direction and purpouse about which you are asking. Speaking of which I've been thinking more about buying Leo's life purpose course lately, hoping it would help as well.
  4. @ajasatya it's great to hear that thank you for reply, glad to see input from a person who has experienced living in a place like this
  5. @Athena Thanks for the feedback, seems honest and I can imagine why you would think so @bejapuskas Thanks for the reply, I see what you're saying and I agree. I might have to take some time to make the decision. Altough don't you see the travel to India as a viable route at all or do you think I should put more thought into it?
  6. Hey, if you'r reading this and you're 30+ years old please keep reading to the end, altought input from anyone is more than welcome. You can help a real person change his life for better. What I'm looking for is an advice from grounded and mentally stable people as I propably am not all that stable right now. Backstory: Around 2 hours ago my gf of 2 years broke up with me. I am 25 years old guy who still lives with parents, altough I have relativly good job with a lot of potential as a webmaster. It's not my first breakup and I'm aware of the proccess, it hurts now, soon it will get better, and then after a while maybe I won't even mind meeting and talking with her as friend, I've been trough this before. And what I will say now is also propably very typical of my situation, but right now it's 100% honest. She was the best person I have met in my life, and it's hard for me to imagine ever wanting to create a family with anyone else. I could write an essay on how she was different than all the other girls and how it's true that I won't find anyone who will make me fell the way she did, but you all propably know the drill. Another part of my life is that is very important to me is self improvment. What I'd love to believe is that according to spiral dynamics I am propably around 55% green, 44% orange and 1% yellow. I'm past the point where I was attending all kind of toastmasters groups etc. right now I'm more about meditation etc. Except for Leo my biggest authority and inspiration is Sadhguru. For the last 2.5 months I've been practicing yoga, not only hatha yoga but also the ones requiring meditation and more self awareness. So right now I am completly broken, but I know that it's at the same time a great opportunity for me to change something about my life in a huge way. Right now I see only 3 options for myself: 1) Stay in separation with my ex gf, she suggested that we stay in touch untill the new year and see how things work out, maybe she will decide that she wants to come back to me. As I'm writing this I know how pathetic it sounds, as if I was a dog waiting for her to make up her mind, but I know it was very hard for her as well. She has been dealing with clinicly diagnosed depression for propably at least half a year now and she is on medications. I've been helping her get through her worst time and I know that I still mean a lot to her. I'm writing this to make the situation clear that it's not just my desperate hope and wish for her to come back but a potentially real option. Out of all 3 options I know on this one I'm not the only person who has something to say as she might decide that she doesn't want to come back. 2) Forget about my ex, and start new life looking for a new girlfriend, and cultivating my career as a web developer. Right now I cannot possibly imagine being with another girl, but I know it will pass and after a while I'll start looking around for a new gf. At the same time, I can save up money and finally move out of my parents house. It's been difficult for me to do it before as I have some loans that keep me back from doing this. If it was possible earlier I would propably be living with my ex. Most of you are propably aware working in IT has huge potential, and could allow me for having a bigger impact on the world, financial stability and many other benefits, altough if I were to be 100% honest, deep inside me I know I'm not very passionate about web development and that it can hold me back from truly achiving a great career. 3) Last option, save up money, pay back my loans, and buy a one way ticket to India and join a yogic ashram, and commit myself to practicing yoga there. It is not some kind of desperate reaction to the breakup. It's something I've been considering for a while now, altough I didn't take it all that seriously as I've been planning to spend the rest of my life with my gf. Right now, it is reallistcly possible for me to do that, I have no real bounds holding me in my home, I have almost no friends that I would miss and I don't really get along with my parents. I've been watching Sadhgurus videos almost religiously, I think he is a great and wise person, and if that's what it takes to attain similar mastery over my body and emotions then I am ready to do this. I see that the state I am in right now is not due to my girlfriend breaking up with me, but rather me having no control over whats going on in my head, and as long as I won't change it I can chase my tail for the rest of my life trying to find a perfect girlfriend and a perfect carieer and still not being happy. What I'm looking for is an insight and maybe an adivce from people more expierienced from me. I know that in a way I'm at a crossroads in my life. I can impact rest of my life in a huge way, and I know in the end nobody can make a decision for me, I will have to do it myself. But I don't want to relly only on my limited experience, and perhaps very emotional attitude towards this whole situation. Also, in a way I'm exactly sure which outcome I wish for from this entire situation, first of all I wish my girlfriend would come back to me and that we would spend rest life together. Maybe it sounds naive, but I know I could find another girl relativly easy, I just think she was just the perfect match for me and no matter what happens I will never stop loving her. Second best option in my mind is me going to India and practicing yoga there. I know I could just stay where I live and practice anyway, but what I'm looking for in this option is to fully transform myself. If you read it all, thank you for your time, I hope you can give me an insight on this situation from another perspective. I really need this.
  7. I'm also interested with opinions on Sadhguru's courseif anyone has taken them Altough there are plenty videos online of meditations guided by Sadghuru which might be also usefull if you don't want to spend money on courses. @TheSomeBody
  8. Ask yourself a question, why do I need confirmation from others? Give yourself some time to answer it. It might be because you don't feel like you're good enough, or that your opinion matters. Whatever it might be remember that it's ok to feel that way. Knowing the source of that feeling is in my opinion first step to dealing with it.
  9. @Leo Gura I haven't read all of the responses to the topic so I'm sorry if this was suggested before. How about you remove all of the reputation and thumbs up, but instead give something like "thank you" button, which would work as following: - Any user can click it but it has no appearant impact, nobody would see how many or if any people "thanked" someone for their post - User whos post got "thank you" will see it in notifications but nowhere else What's the goal of that function? Person who would see their post has been helpful to someone else will be motivated to help others in the future again and put effort in their posts, but there will be no more ranks and other reputation to motivate spammers
  10. What @Nexeternity said. Leo has more than rich list that covers I think all of the topics you mentioned. I'm sure you wouldn't be disappointed. Also a good way to give back for all of the work he gives for free
  11. Sounds very familiar to what some people experience while trying to exit body (OOBE) which you might have been close to even though you might never have heard of it. Which btw is also achived by "conciouss falling asleep". It also happened to me once that after trying to exit my body which I tried to do in a very similar fashion to what you described, I woke up paralised and saw a demon right next to my bed. Also the fact that you had a bad day might have been importat, often I read that your intentions might be key to what you experience during OOBE. If that's not it then I have no other ideas.
  12. Hey, I'd like to describe to you recent experience I had and at the same time ask for a guidance. So I was very often wondering about the whole notion of being everything / nothing. Long time ago have I realized I am not my body, as I started meditating more often and contemplating this stuff I also started realizing I am not my mind or thoughts. But when I listened to Leo or anyone else say that we are everything / nothing there was one thing that was holding me back from fully giving into this notion, and that was a question I kept asking myself - "if that's really the case, why am I perceiving reality from perspective of this body?". It was really hard for me to get over this. But two days ago something kinda clicked in my head and I thought to myself, it's true that I am perceiving life/reality from perspective of this body, but I also perceive it from every other perspective possible, I just cannot access all of those perspectives at once, I just perceive them each in it's seperate body and in a way I for the first time realized how it might be true that I am in fact everyone. What I mean by what I just wrote is that, obviously there are different physical bodies and different people, but when we strip our core self from body and then from mind and thoughts, then what is left is that consciousness that is universall for every physical body and mind and that in fact thats exactly what I am, and if in fact it's universall for everyone then it means "I" am everybody. As you propably might know from your own experience it's often hard to put realizations like those into words but I hope it's more or less understandable. Okay, so now I'm getting closer to the core of this post and I will give you example which might also make what I wrote more clear. During this realization, I started thinking of everone on this planet as of "me". Like if at that moment I walked out of the door and greeted my neighbour I would really feel like I was greeting myself, as if entire world was just one big interaction of me with myself under different disguises. And then I thought of my girlfriend, who suffers from clinicly diagnosed depression, and I recalled many things she told me about how she feels terrible sometimes and how she doesn't want to live. I obviously always felt very bad about it but in that moment, I realized it was also really my suffering. I literally started crying because I felt like I could feel her depression and her suffering, but I wasn't crying out of misery of what it might feel like to have depression, i was crying out of what felt like infinite compassion I started feeling towards others. And then I had another realization, that I cannot be truly happy as long as there is suffering in this world and that it obviously must be my highest goal to help other people, there is no other way around. Right now when I think about it, even though I was very sad during that experience I find it as something great and I'm glad it happened to me. And now that I explained more or less what the experience was about I will try to explain what kind of guidance I'm looking for and what are my thoughts about all of it. Obviously, I'm not feeling the way I felt then all the time, but when I focus I can kinda get into that state of mind of infinite compassion again. But even though I don't feel like this all the time it's still clear in my head I have to be helping other people to make them suffer less. But now here I start to wonder, if I were to get into state of mind where I cannot be happy when other people suffer then obviously I will never be happy because there will always be other people suffering. I also recalled Leo saying that there is no "bad" things and that everything what is, must be the way it is, in other words just to accept what is and not fight with it. So now I am kind of split apart, should I let that experience lead me into this "helper to everyone" attitude or can it be just a superficially deep distraction from what I really should be after. Or maybe it's just one of many other signs to come that I am on the right path and I should be glad that it happened but not fully give into it? I am very confused about, and I know it's not necessarly a bad thing to be confused but I don't want to waste my life, time and energy into something that might be potentially a dead end. If you're still reading I'm thankfull that you've come this far and if there are any advices or comments that come to your mind I'd be very happy to read them
  13. Depends a lot from friends you have, having a good wingman can be very helpfull. Also I agree with 30secs, being out with your friends puts you in more relaxed and playfull mood which is good than being there alone, though it's also bit personal so you have to decide for yourself.
  14. Leo has made a video about positive affirmations which are very powerfull tool that you can use to set your mindset right. I am still very lazy myself and I'm far from doing them correctly everyday but I can already tell that they can make a huge change in your head, you should definetly look this video up.