LittoDitto

I'd like to see more art.

I've been in the "Now" before, but life hit me and now I just don't know anymore. Not really sure if I've progressed or regressed basically. mmm, maybe that's what I need to find out.

I'm not sure how to know what comes after physical death when I haven't physically died before.

If weed harms you in a sufficiently, unexpectedly, possibly permanent way, you will lose interest in it (traumatization). This of course is not a ideal method, but it is what happened to me. (Don't try and harm yourself with weed.) I am open to maybe eating edibles again one day, but I have a extremely low probability of ever smoking it again.

Do you think civil war is possible whether or not trump is elected eventually? Who would be the opponents? When would it happen?

So i'm going on vacation in the next couple of weeks, and i've been researching about bed bugs and how they can be in hotels. I've been watching this bed bug exterminator guy on youtube, and he recommends spraying a pesticide in my house (and maybe vehicle) before leaving as a preventative measure so bed bugs will die if you bring them home. Do you think this is worth doing? I'll be staying at a few hotels.

@QVx I have not yet. But it's on the to-do list =) @Cheese Uhm, previously I thought Psychotherapy was wrong, then I thought I could do it by watching videos and researching and what not, now I think you don't really know what it is unless you experience it first hand. Unfortunately the suicidal thoughts remain. @Schizophonia Thank you!

Today I'm having a normal day which I probably experience once every 150 days or so. Why do you think this is, and how can I create more of these days? I've asked this question to myself on these rare days, but I haven't come up with anything particularly conclusive. All of my current traumas are dormant. Thus creating a normal day. I have never gone to therapy, taken psychedelics, or taken anti-depressants. I do consider doing these things on a daily basis. For about 6 months I have taken small steps everyday to try to help/heal my traumas. My other days I would consider as major depression. Finally I've been in major depression for about 3 years.

Great clip. I think of this video often. I used to watch it a whole lot, but I've definitely been weening off of it. Not because i've forced myself to do so, but because of let's say, "the power of time". I find in the process of healing, when you don't have to do things that you were absolutely forced to do previously, due to trauma, that could be the bread and butter of healing trauma.

The music genre of Chillstep has a good amount of Alan Watts in it.

I think if you feel like you're gonna cry, or you're crying, that's good.

I find life is better with out negative thoughts arising, but when one comes up, it usually cascades into more negative thoughts until I am overwhelmed and there is no fixing it when it gets to that point. I could try loving the negative thought, but what does that mean? Do I say "go away negative thought" or "I accept you negative thought" or "this might not be true, negative thought" etc? If you know how to love a negative thought, or another productive way of dealing with a negative thought, it would be a pleasure reading what you have to say. Thank You. Edit: Also under the same topic, what do I do with a negative emotion?

If we're saying, More advanced school system = Less cheating than that's fine, but if what is written above is true, that means there will be less people who cheat, and those who do, have to create more advanced strategies to do so, thus making it harder. Would that benefit the cheater in the long run? I would say it's possible. It's how the cheater interprets what they did, and what it means. Cheater's are not aware of the big picture of what they are doing until after they are done cheating, whether by being caught, or graduating (or ceasing to cheat, I suppose). Even then, the big picture can be kinda murky. I don't think there is a way to make the system so perfect that no one ever cheats in school. Is a cheater a part of the system, or separately trying to defeat the system? I would say both.

For what it's worth, I've watched the "Spiritual Perspective On Suicide" video many times over. It has helped me.

Well, when I have wrote down questions on a index card, I found it's pretty effective at addressing personal fears/concerns to a doctor. The last time I saw a doctor, I didn't write down anything and just told myself I would bring up my questions naturally. I chickened out and didn't ask any questions. You can put your questions on your lap so the doctor will address the index card, or it will encourage you to go forward and ask your questions.