ThePoint

@King Merk That’s the entire issue - I don’t enjoy the things I used to enjoy a lot. I can’t enjoy anything at all. Nothing makes me feel alive and engaged anymore, including the things that used to make me feel alive and engaged. @StarStruck I wish I could be angry. I think anger can fuel passion and purpose in a way. But literally nothing angers me. Everything just feels so flat...

I know this post/thread is many years old, but this is timeless and still rings true to this day. I think a lot of people on this forum, including myself, need to be reminded of this. I want to use this as an example of timeless wisdom that was posted many years ago that should still be applied today. If moderators want to lock this then feel free to do so, but I want to see other people’s perspective on this.

@Leo Gura If you close your account, do all of your comments, posts, and private messages get deleted?

@StarStruck What are some examples of acts of compassions towards oneself?

@StarStruck This sounds a lot like David Hawkin’s scale. Did they work together or something? I’ll check out the book anyway. I’ve been stuck at Apathy for the past year and a half. I’ve tried to take it one step at a time, and tried to go up to Grief by regretting my decisions etc. But it doesn’t last for long because I just don’t care. I’m indifferent to everything. Even regret can be somewhat motivating but I can’t even feel that. In fact anything on that scale above apathy can be motivating in their own ways. I should be caring more but I don’t. I should be more frustrated that I don’t care but I’m not. I’m just completely flat. That’s exactly why I knew Andrew Tate would be brought up in this thread. He incites hunger and anger in men, which may work for some people who are apathetic because it nudges them enough to go from apathy to something higher. But maybe my brain is so apathetic that even those nudges don’t work. @BipolarGrowth Thanks. I’ll listen to the audiobook. @Eyowey I didn’t mention working out in my post. But thanks for sharing. I do work out by the way. Thanks.

@kylan11 Are you a software developer?

I need to be taking a lot more action than I currently am. The fact that I am not taking as much action as I should be taking is going to catch up with me. In general, I am becoming weaker. I want to become strong again. Before this guy gets brought up, yes I have watched and listened to Andrew Tate, and still do to an extent. He just doesn't make anything 'click' in me the same way it seems to do for others. It is likely due to a difference in values, e.g. I have little to no interest in girls or relationships. I don't care about getting rich anymore, but I used to care about getting rich. Maybe if I saw Andrew Tate before I lost myself to anhedonia and emotional blunting I would resonate with some of what he says, but I don't really feel 'normal' or even 'human' the way I currently am, I think there is something wrong with my brain, so the things he teaches doesn't currently resonate with me. I am looking for a kick in the ass. I need something to kick me into motion. I'm in a rut, and I need to start moving ASAP.

@A Fellow Lighter Thank you. That's the problem. I can't seem to muster up a new vision. I redid the LP course all over again since this issue started. Still couldn't feel any spark. My values list doesn't spark me anymore. Also, it's not like my vision was old. It's relatively recent, even now (not even 2 years old yet). I suddenly lost complete interest in it when it was around 8 months old, when it previously got me moving and made me feel alive and was what made me love life. While this is true, the frequency of my masturbation was much less. I averaged around 3-5 times a month. Now I do more than that in a week alone. Now my average is like 30-40 times a month. That's like a 10x increase in frequency compared to when I still had my 'old self' and wasn't neurotic. I still had some problems with food when I wasn't masturbating as much, but I am open to this being a possibility. See, that is one of my main goals at the moment. The only reason I have to live, is hope. Hope that I will get better. Hope that I will get out of this. But I don't know if hope alone is enough. I wish there was just one thing that I could still enjoy, that would get me through every day. But I don't have that right now. So I just need to continue researching and implementing things. May I ask you what is your reason to live?

@Osaid @thisintegrated @LSD-Rumi I would like to see what you think about this video: What are your thoughts?

@A Fellow Lighter I do believe I’ll find a solution to it. I refuse to believe that this will be the rest of my life. So Bramacharya is abstinence from ejaculation right? How do you jerk off during the day without ejaculating? Is that even satisfying for you? An internet search shows that Mula Bandha is a type of yoga. Is there any particular exercise or video you follow?

@thisintegrated ??

@thisintegrated A link to any comment of that discussion would be nice.

@thisintegrated Bro, your journal has 1865 posts and 94 pages... I asked a few simple questions.

@BlessedLion How did you get to this point?

@LSD-Rumi So fapping does indeed decrease energy? @Osaid That is true. If that thought was absolutely true and taken literally, then I wouldn't be alive right now because I wouldn't eat or move. I'm not taking action on what I should be doing. I'm at the same position I was a year ago. I have not made any progress in my life in the past year and a half. That sounds about right. I don't take enough action relative to want I want to do, which is to solve my health problems. I should be experimenting and researching more but I'm not. Yes, there is not a single thing inspiring to you. I know what inspiration feels like. I wasn't just born without being able to feel inspiration. The last time I felt inspiration was about 2 years ago. Anhedonia + emotional blunting stripped inspiration away from me. I don't have any real hobbies anymore, and my previous passions + crafts don't have any spark to them anymore. It's like I lost who I am. I genuinely wish there was at least just one thing out there that I could enjoy, or that inspired me. That alone would probably get me through every day. Now I can't feel emotions the same way I used to, and I don't care about anything anymore, it's like I have lost a part of my humanity. If I can't feel emotions, then why live at all? I think it's more in the multi-millions. The r/NoFap subreddit alone has over 1 million members. So the actual amount of people who subscribe to it or similar things like semen retention is likely a lot more. Look at how many views the topic gets on websites like YouTube. Given how many people are a part of these circles, and how widespread it is, this does sound quite far-fetched. I am open to the possibility that these circles are indeed groups of people with masturbation-related illnesses, it just sounds very unlikely. Almost every person I talk to this about relates to at least some of the symptoms after masturbating, like less energy.