Michael Paul

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About Michael Paul

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  1. Mantak Chia’s The Multi-Orgasmic Man
  2. After watching Leo’s latest video on death, I think I finally understand why I’ve been struggling with spirituality and suffering through the pain of confusion. It has to do with the fact that I haven’t seen that death is actually love. I spent much of the early part of my life fearing death, trying to run from death, until I had a full awakening into the nature of death — it’s nothing but love. When I was two years old, we lived in a 3 story house. My room was on the top floor and our chimney ran down the outside of the wall of my bedroom. One night as I lay in my bed, lightning struck the chimney and completely blew out the wall of my bedroom. I remember being so terrified that I couldn’t even speak or see anything. I had tunnel vision for a few hours. The noise is what scared me the most. I’m pretty sure that experience altered my unconscious reality and made me more sensitive to suffering and death than the average person. But now I’m able to recontextualize this experience and realize that this early brush with death was important because it gave me a new appreciation for life.
  3. @silene I’ve felt more able to forgive myself at different times in my life than this time period, and I’m not exactly sure why. It’s something I need to work on. And I’m not against sex per se, but a certain kind of unhealthy attachment, addiction and lustful pursuit of it.
  4. I’ve struggled with spirituality for my entire life. Even to this day I still have trouble grasping certain ideas and dealing with the ego’s fears surrounding my true divine nature. I feel a lot of pain, depression, and shame for certain actions I’ve done in the past, and I want to do better in the future. I don’t want my life to veer off into a negative direction where I’m chasing unhealthy pleasure to avoid pain and suffering, yet I find myself engaging in activities that I don’t think are good for me. Some of which include pornography and sex. I guess I just want to say that I’m not perfect but I want to do better.
  5. I left this thread alone for a few days as I was traveling and had some pretty interesting revelations during that time period. I’m not quite sure why I even asked this question on this forum, I guess I just was in a different state of mind and thinking about people in a unique way. I don’t actually think other people exist in the way I used to, even a week ago.
  6. @Leo Gura How come I’m imagining extreme levels of suffering if I don’t want to suffer at all?
  7. By this I mean, could some people be totally lacking consciousness and higher intellect? Are there some people who look and act like conscious beings but on the inside they have no subjective experience of reality? And how would we ever know? I ask this because I also wonder whether everyone possesses Kundalini and if that determines whether they have a subjective consciousness. I’m not claiming this to be the case of every human, or even the majority of people. But some segment of the population.
  8. Also, for anyone following this thread, Spinoza claims that humans and all finite beings are “modes” or expressions of God. So there is no contradiction here with what Leo teaches.
  9. The ultimate truth can be pointed to through language and philosophy, but I agree with you that getting lost in philosophy won’t ultimately lead one to realization. I think it’s good, however, to find people who share common views to you who have a general understanding of how nature works. Even if they’re no longer alive and were from a different time period. Confirmation of knowledge through various sources can prove to be a great way to solidify understanding, in my opinion.
  10. Spinoza was a European philosopher in the 17th century who was one of the first of his time (in his culture) to propose a pantheistic understanding of God or Nature. His magnum opus, Ethics, directly challenged fundamentalist, traditional Judeo-Christian religion (and all religion in general) and tenets of God being an anthropomorphic being with characteristics of man. His understanding of God or Nature was that of an all-encompassing, eternal, infinite substance. He denied humans and even God as having free will, as everything is dictated by causes. Is anyone familiar with his work? If so, what are your thoughts on this great philosopher? It is my opinion that he had a certain degree of spiritual enlightenment.
  11. @Buba I’ve been through something similar. It’s hard. You have to keep going and not give up, eventually it gets better and you learn how to live with it.
  12. @Buba Everyone is on a unique path. Some people are being elevated through different experiences, some of which are dark. These can be an extreme catalyst for growth. @bobbyward Masturbation can be grounding during the kundalini process. Just don’t over saturate yourself with it.
  13. @Nahm Another deep insight for me to contemplate Nahm! Thanks!
  14. @Nickyy We have to talk about free will as if it were an attribute of being human. It would be inaccurate to say that “we are” free will, rather it would be a part of us if it existed. So, how would this part of us come to a place of choosing something? We say “we choose”, but in reality it would be our free will choosing (if we had it), not us. That’s the point I was trying to make.