PenguinPablo

In my short 27 years on this planet, I've had tremendous opportunities... I was obsessed with pickup for some time and I literally got to work alongside some of the top pickup artist in the world. They saw something on me and took a chance. There were several reasons why I left. Some were the pickup guys fault but I also just felt like I wasn't holding up my weight. Next to these guys, I felt like an imposter. So I felt guilty even being around them. Before this, I was in college for industrial engineering. I failed almost every class one semester (the semester I transferred from community college to a university) and I felt so bad I moved back home with my parents. I felt bad because my mom was working long hours at a factory to help pay for my education (I also took on loans but felt terrible about having her work in a factory, meanwhile I am pissing away the opportunity). In the end, abandoning the 3.5 years of effort I put into my engineering education. Now, I am in a similar situation working with very high level people in the solar industry. I've had flashes of excellence over the last month but I have nothing to show for it. The same familiar feeling of unworthiness prevails my mind. Although, here it's worse because you need a certain amount of belief and confidence to do well in sales. Something, I conjure the will to go out and make things happen. But most of the time, I'm dropping the ball. I feel like leaving once again. One of the guys on the team decided to take me under his wing and help me out. Now I feel like an asshole again since I don't feel like I am putting my best foot forward. The urge to abandon this endeavor is blossoming once again. Emotionally, I kind of feel like moving back with my parents and locking myself in my room for weeks at a time. There's a weird sense of comfort in laying in bed most of the day feeling sorry for myself -- every few days conjuring the will and the vision to strive for excellence. And then relapse. I joined this sales team because I felt that the accountability aspect would help. In some ways it has but I have not made any money and I am fucking stressed. I guess I am trying to find a solution. Whether pragmatic or psychological. I'm not sure what the answer is exactly.

yo mama

get into sales bro. high ticket stuff -- solar, roofing, software... and so on. easy $100k in a year if you work your ass off (if not way more)

why so condescending... unnecessary

Interesting, Dr Ramani has made a whole ass career of doing that on YouTube. Pretty much every video revolves around shitting on narcissist with absolutely no leeway. Personally, I think such a one-sided approach has it's drawbacks. You shouldn't reduce a person to a psychological construct and vilify every one of them. Vakim is dope. Found him a couple months ago.

you can change 100%, don't short change yourself

@integral you're putting her on a pedestal. So if a raging narcissist like Trump says something with absolute conviction you just praise them for autheNticiTy ??? In his mind, that's his truth... He's better than everyone else... The guise of spirituality does not change the underlying dynamic.

Integrate your shadow.

I just ask myself: Is this guy about that life or he is full of shit?

@mr_engineer One thing is for sure... the documentary team cannot be trusted. Still, regardless the clip with Simon and Teal and episode one (the real one Teal just released) still makes both of them seem like assholes. Teal still basically says "I am all knowing because I am God; therefore I don't need outside feedback." -- I understand at the ultimate level this is true but seems like a dysfunctional way to utilize these spiritual truths and bypass your own issues Secondly, it seems like Simon is there with an agenda. The framing of his questions is kinda confrontational as well. To me it seems like he's playing ego games and is trying to bait Teal. It's complicated... I would say. No one is all good or all bad.

@Matthew85 what's the difference?

To be fair, Leo says and still holds strong attachments to the physical world. i.e. women.

fuckin awesome bro. I'm trying to save a million or two and then do the same as you

I had an enlightenment my first ever meditation session following the breath for 5 minutes

Leo Gura Eckhart Tolle Adyashanti Oliver Wright Michael David Larsen

appreciate it homie I been on that health revamp as of late

Love PT and Steven Wilson

@SgtPepper I think you might enjoy Pink Floyd. I'd give them a go on your next trip.

Lysergic bliss - of montreal

agreed but no one is perfect

@PepperBlossoms I get what you're saying. Why don't you partner up with one of your girlfriends?

Looking for accountability buddies also.

Completely agree. Video courses are insanely over-priced. Books tend to be more thorough as well because consider how much info you can condense into even a 100 page book, versus 5-10 minute video clips that you regularly see in video courses. The problem is video courses are typically associated with higher price tags, whereas books stay in the $5 - $25 range. TLDR; courses are overrated and overpriced. Read more books.

What is your favorite game? Chess What is your favorite co-op game? Don't have any... What is your favorite retro game? Super Mario Bros 1985 What is your favorite online FPS? Black Ops

Chess Reading Shamatha Practice