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About Ryan_047

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  1. Okay, so, someone(probably) just killed himself /herself and all I see is mocking, memes, jokes and all sort of individuals showing off their "knowledge" and spiritual egos... I find this interesting, yet horrifying. Honestly, I can't see how you can make the decision to kill yourself out of a place of consciousness and enlightment,most of the time it would come from a place of suffering and loneliness. The truth is that no of you personally knew him/her, so you don't know what kind of person he/she was or what kind of problems he/she was facing, so you should shut up. You are just making assumptions about his "conscious death" that came from a "place of free will". Also, please imagine you are one of his/her relatives and you discover this particular post... You'll see people making jokes and memes instead of trying to help or at least get to the reasons behind this action.Isn't it a bit weird why he hasn't fully expressed his reasons for committing suicide? I highly doubt that most of you are enlightened, yet most of you claim to know what happens after death and claim to have knowledge about the mechanics of the existence itself - _-...when in fact they are just beliefs. Spiritual egos are indeed dangerous. I'm pretty sure people will start mocking me subtly. Go ahead, I'm not near the level of personal and spiritual development that you have attended, I surely need your valuable insights. Personally, I no longer see any purpose in continuing this thread, I would advise the mods to close it.
  2. Your journal inspires me to start my own journal..I admire your courage to actually use a picture of yourself as the profile picture(you're cute by the way).I've barely got myself to upload my profile picture,which is not me. I'm currently paralyzed by the fact that I know I'll have to speak out in class in the following weeks.I felt either stress or anxiety all day long and I couldn't study anything to actually get ready for school.
  3. I try to do basic shadow work by writing.I start off with a question like "How do I feel?","Why am I lazy?" and then just start asking "why?" to the answers that I generate.This way you can get in touch with different parts of you and find out what they truly want and create integration.Not as effective as child work or diving deep into your emotions and asking them directly why they arise,but it helps you gain awareness regarding certain parts of yourself.I might feel a little "lighter" after some writing sessions,so I guess it's effective at some degree.
  4. @Commodent Thank you very much,I've done this unconsciously a few times and I noticed it working.I'll try to turn this into a conscious process.
  5. @Commodent Thank you so much for this post, it's eye opening. I'd like to ask you what practical things you do to bring up your emotions and grieve them.Most of the time I feel numb and when I sit down and start journaling feelings may come up,but very weakly and they go away fast.
  6. Could someone recommend a book that explains what emotions are,what they mean and their overall mechanics? Edit:Concrete answers please...-_-
  7. @Elysian Thank you for the article,it made me understand my situation better.Just finished my today's meditation session and the body movements got stronger.I moved my legs and my back.It was weird,but felt like I was healing.I feel lighter in some areas of my body.Do I have to worry about spontaneous movements throughout the day?I don't want to have body spams at school or something.
  8. I see,so it's a good sign,thank you all. @SFRL I am using a pillow and the back of my head still hurts after long sessions.
  9. @SFRL I see.How much time are you meditating per day?I meditate for 30 minutes lying down and I notice that the back of my head my start to hurt because I don't change my head position.Do you experience the same problem?
  10. @Hellspeed Thank you for your answer.I Googled Muladhara,since I don't know what it meant,and found out it's the root chakra located at the base of the spine.I can see how you deduced that energy is released from Muladhara since my spine jumped.However,does that explain the rest of the movements,like my arms and chest muscles ones? Also,if energy is being released from Muladhara,is that a good thing?As you can see, I'm new to this domain of chakras.I'd appreciate a brief explanation.
  11. Recently,while meditating,some of my body parts started to suddenly move.For example,the pectorals and the deltoids are "jumping",so to speak.My biceps may either jump,or move sideways.Sometimes,my feet start to move,or even my fingers(from my hands) might perform subtle movements.Today,my shoulderblades moved at the same time and the base of my spine jumped,if that makes any sense.Worth pointing out I meditate lying down. Am I doing something wrong?Today,the frequency of the movements has increased,compared to the previous meditation sessions.They are not violent nor disturbing,yet I don't know what they ought to represent.
  12. This morning,after I ate my breakfast,I decided to meditate.I was sitting on a chair,straight up spine,hands on my legs facing up.I'm meditating for 30 minutes using the do nothing technique.I usually center myself by breathing deeply a few times.Today I felt a tightness in my chest,and I couldn't breathe deeply because of it(this happens often,but it goes away relatively fast).So I started breathing deeply at a regular pace,and I noticed a tingling and numbness sensation appeared in the middle of chest, above of where the tightness was present,and it has gotten rapidly more intense. I decided to breathe normally until the sensation would go away.However,it kept growing in intensity and that tingling and numbness sensation made it's way to my head(in the area of the Phone Bone).As it was getting worse,I freaked out a bit and stopped.It has been 10 minutes of meditation.I took a 2 minutes break and started again.This time, the sensation reappeared in my left foot and right hand simultaneously,and yet again it made it's way up the middle of my chest and head(this time the face's muscles were involved too).I also felt like there was something rising up from the base of my neck (kind of like the sensation you feel before vomiting,but not that bad).5 minutes later,I have taken another 3 minutes break.I tried standing up and I felt lighter in the extremities of my body,and also my chest felt heavier.After that I started again,the sensation was there,but not with such high intensity,it was bearable.When my meditation session was over I felt lighter in the whole body and the numbness was gone. I'm not sick,or taking medication of any kind.Have I done something wrong when I meditated? It's the first time this happened to me..also,for some reason I started to dream a lot at night.. sometimes I have 2-3 different dreams.
  13. Hello! Could meditating while lying down be harmful? I'm meditating 30 minutes per day lying down in my bed.My head is on my pillow and my body is facing the ceiling.Recently I've noticed that the back of my head starts to hurt because of this.Not dizziness or head pain,but the exterior back of my head hurts because of the pressure on the pillow during the meditation session.How should I continue meditating so this problem will go away?(I want to continue to meditate lying down because of reasons).