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334 Unbelievable!

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About Christian

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  • Birthday 10/27/1998

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  1. It's not your looks that is the problem. It is a self image problem which requires real growth to change. Maybe you have low self esteem. The only reason your looks hinder you is because you think it does and it has everything to do with you, not reality. Take responsibility and accept yourself first, try to contemplate why you feel this way. How come you feel like your looks hinder you? You could sit down for 10 hours and contemplate and still wouldn't get to the root of the issue. It requires deep inner work so get started!
  2. @Paradigm I don't think there are any magic keys in life that lead to fast growth. Maybe psychedelics, but can't speak from personal experience. However, I know if you keep building positive habits, you will see some growth in the end for your efforts. They come as a natural consequence, but it takes months and years before you notice a difference. Keep meditating, that is a great habit to have established. Build some habits that are related to your life purpose once you find it and keep working your way up Maslow's hierachy of needs. Handle the basics first as they are critical to sustain your development. My best advice to do this effectively would be to focus on the proces and be detached from outcome. Realize this is difficult to do in practice, but that means it is a valueable skill to acquire. Nothing worth having ever comes easy my friend
  3. @Spiral If someone does something hurtful to you, don't fight back in an egotistical manner. Realize that that sort of behaviour will bite you in the ass through karma counter intuitively. Karma is NOT some law in the universe which states that every time something negative happens to someone, that person has to be punished in some external manner. That is a moral framework which human beings construct and use to gain control and power. What karma really is is selfish action. Every time you act in a selfish way, karma hits you. It leads to suffering in your life. Selfish actions come in active and passive forms. If you ignore someone for selfish reasons, karma will bite you in the ass. Even if you get revenge, you still lose in the end. Retreat and have enough self respect to stay out of drama. Stop spending time aroundwith those who hurt you. Video reccomendations:
  4. Self actualization can be used to satisfy the ego. It can be counter-productive, it depends on which mental and practical approach one takes and how it connects to their personality type, gender, strengths, etc. If done incorrectly, self actualization can make you more egotistical. There are many traps as well on the path of self actualization and these traps function to serve the ego/self by keeping it stuck in homeostasis. But I think awareness/understanding of these traps on the journey can make one more aware and function as a map to self actualization. The problem that gets most people stuck is lack of open mindedness and self-honesty and accurate understanding of themselves.
  5. Start small. Maybe just study for 5 minutes and take a 5 minute break and repeat this cycle until you're finished. Work yourself up from there, but make sure that you concentrate during those 5 minutes and in general when you study. On a scale of 1-10, let your concentration be within the range of 8-10 when studying. I really like this formula from the book "How to be a straight A student" by Cal Newport: Work accomplished=time spent*intensity of focus If your focus is at a 10, and you work for 5 min, you will more work done than if you work for 45 min with a concentration of 3. See the importance of focus? Other points: -Remove distractions -Clean your room -Create a space to study - Have water and healthy snacks within hands reach Good luck
  6. @Tendani I agree with a lot of the things you say here. Firstly, in order to achieve any goal, one needs to first have an idea of what you want to achieve. It can't be a vague idea like I just want to lose weight. It has to be a measurable, concrete goal because then you can more easily make course corrections along the way. Also, when you have your vision, it helps to visualize having achieved the goal in the present moment. But action still needs to be the main priority because no one can ever achieve anything without hard work and sacrifice which you also said. Just visualizing a goal without having an executable plan is more like having a dream. It's nice to have aspirations, but that in itself is a cult. The distinction between a goal and a dream is a goal -- if it is a real goal -- is backed up with an executable plan for how to get from A to B. Essentially how to realize the goal/manifest it
  7. Becoming an autodidact - what does that mean in your case? That sounds rather abstract. You need to be more concrete here if you want to actualize your career choice of become an autodidact. To begin your question of specifying your purpose, Start studying the things you LOVE and develop a plan for how you can turn that into a career and gain lots of knowledge within that field. 10.000 hours is what it takes to build mastery in anything. Just get started. If you want to leave school you need to be VERY clear on what you want first. Clearly define what your purpose is. Then you can work toward it and make small bets. Don't leave school without a clear realistic knowing of what you want and create a stable income. Show that you can financially support yourself doing what you love. But until then, my suggestion would be to stay in school even though you may dislike it until your purpose starts to yield results. You gotta know that plan B is tangible and brings in results before quitting plan A essentially. When there is a well-thought out decision for why you should leave school, leave then and only then. Until then, balance school and work on your life purpose simultaneously
  8. @Martin123 Haaahaha, fair point. No one expected Trump to be president where I am from too so when he became president, everyone was in shock. But back on topic: The guy just seems like he has the conceptual understanding of enlightenment, but his life does NOT reflect his understanding. If you are truly enlightened, you would have passion, be loving, care about the people around you, be authentic, do what is best for everyone, not just yourself. He does clearly lacks these characteristics, but he seems to use enlightenment as a way to dive further into delusion. Watch the full video and you will see what I mean:
  9. @Martin123 What do you mean?
  10. I just watched an episode on doctor Phil and interestingly this time it was about enlightenment. For some background knowledge: There is this guy who has neglected his family, lost 200.000$ for his family and now spends most of his time pursuing enlightenment. What fascinates me is that he got scammed out of 200.000 dollars and he did not give a fuck. Literally. He did not even try to go to court or anything. He just called it "bad karma" and that trips me the fuck out. His wife thinks he is going insane and to the average observer, he is. What scares me though is the amount of incongruence in the way he lives life and what he says. He also seems very arrogant/close minded. He claims to know everything and it seems like he's just a complete dick. However, what is fascinating is that he uses many of the correct terms for enlightenment and has a certain understanding of spirituality. But it is intellectual understanding and he clearly does not embody the principles. In my opinion, I think he is psychologically unstable and a clear example of false enlightenment. Just watch the video and you will know: Questions for a discussion: When do you think people are ready for enlightenment? What are the dangers/traps along the path to enlightenment? How do you evaluate whether or not you are ready for enlightenment? He clearly did not and look what happened What is the distinction true and fake spirituality and how to avoid fake spirituality? Would love to hear your opinion on this, especially @Leo Gura . What do you think?
  11. In self development there is a paradox. On the one hand, you need to accept yourself fully, but on the other hand you also need to develop yourself. It is important that you get the self-acceptance component right. Because if you change yourself from a sense of lack, that will lead to all sorts of disaster down the road because the motivation is not stable. If you are motivated to change your financial situation because you lack money and you then become rich, you will no longer have a desire to keep striving. It creates a yo-yo effect. However, if you decide to change yourself from a foundation of self acceptance, the motivation you tap into is authentic. Authentic motivation is a lot more stable than neurotic motivation in the long run.
  12. @blacksapp This is not a problem with you not being able to attract people. It is more about how you may lack self esteem and confidence. You probably believe that it is your looks that hold you back from attracting the right people. But this whole focus on appearance is just a part of the social matrix and our culture, but it is all an illusion. You were fed this whole idea that some people are beautiful and ugly at a very young age when you had no awareness of how to differentiate what is right and wrong. So you simply believed what people around you told you and used that to place yourself somewhere on that beauty scale - toward the uglier end.And now who is paying the price? But how do you overcome this? Existential inquiry is my suggestion, could be right or wrong, but nevertheless, I think it will help.' I have some things I want you to think about to really transcend this idea of beauty and hopefully get rid of it all together. I want you to get rid of the idea of beauty like a cancer patient would extract his tumor. Heartlessly, brutally and efficiently. Try to understand this: No one is beautiful or ugly in the absolute sense. TRY TO GRASP THIS: NO ONE IS BEAUTIFUL OR UGLY IN THE ABSOLUTE SENSE. BEAUTY IS ARBITRARY. TRY TO ACTUALLY FIND THE BEAUTY. IS IT REAL OR IS IT SIMPLY YOUR MIND LABELLING PEOPLE AND THINGS WITHOUT BEING CONSCIOUS THAT IT IS ALL A GAME, A FALSE GAME? Even our justifications of why someone/something is beautiful is arbitrary. It stems from our preferences as a species and who says our preferences are right? WHAT JUSTIFYES THAT OUR HUMAN PREFERENCES ARE RIGHT/TRUE? TRY TO HONESTLY ANSWER THIS. Look at what is going on existentially and I am willing to bet that it is not your physical looks that really hold you back, but the fact that you BELIVE they do. This belief has probably messed a little with your self esteem and I think it is time you throw this whole beauty thing out the window. If it does not help you to believe that you are physically attractive, why do it is my question? If you actually do the investigation, I am willing to bet you are going to laugh your ass off at how stupid this whole notion of beauty is and possibly get rid of it.
  13. @NicAndStuff I have a theory about why we sometimes behave in inauthentic ways and it goes like this: You are a human being. A human being has certain needs and desires. If these needs and desires are not met at the proper time in the right amount, you face internal wounds and begin to feel like something is missing and you begin to crave that thing which you lack . When you crave something, you begin to want it and act as if you do not already have it. Through the law of attraction, lack attracts lack meaning if you think about lack, that is what you get. On another level, you sabotage yourself and maybe even indulge in victim thinking to prevent you even more from having what you desire. That could be through acting inauthentically or out of integrity with our values. Commonly, when we are in a state of lack, we also tend to manipulate and play games with other people which is inauthentic. Maybe we play the victim role, the tough guy/girl, the looser, the shy one, etc. These roles are by definition a overcompensation for an internal wound that we had received earlier in life maybe in childhood. So your psyche protects you from facing that pain because your psyche is designed to avoid pain at all costs. That is part of the story why we can sometimes behave in inauthentic ways according to my theory.
  14. I feel you man. I am in a similar situation myself and it sucks. In our journey, we expect things to be easy and just get better, better better, but then life hits and you are back to square one. That is the way it may seem, but it isn't the truth. All your meditation, self inquiry and other positive habits will contribute to your life on the bigger picture level over years and decades. They are not pointless. But there will be times where you fall into a negative spiral and get angry, sad, depressed. Don't blame yourself for it because there is no self to blame and you have zero control. I would claim it is part of the process and also a neseccary step for you to realize and explore new "darker" aspects of yourself. Backsliding happens as a natural consequences of spiritual purification in consciousness work. This video may clear some things up:
  15. I think maybe it is time for you to find some new friends. And show your old lazy friends how much fun you are having, then when they want you back, just be like: Nope, you lazy bitch". You could join a sports team or maybe sign up for a meditation retreat? Maybe the reason why your old friends are not willing to go out is because they are afraid of the present moment. They would rather escape it through social media, smartphone, drinking, etc. It's hard for many people who are not into consciousness work to even go out in nature and have conversations. It's just too boring for them. But if you find someone at a meditation retreat then: a) they are probably much more psychologically stable b) They are more likely to want to be out in nature with you so It's a win-win. Of course only if you're friends. Make it a win-win situation in a nutshell