Why The Male And Female Are At War With Each Other

[Princess Arabia]

Why? Survival and fear. We see sex as survival. Having our needs met. "You're a threat to that", each says. 

"What we don't understand we fear. What we fear, we judge as evil. What we judge as evil, we attempt to control; and what we cannot control, we attack". - Unknown

Our best defense is knowledge. - Tuvok

We don't understand each other. Instead of attacking, why not try to understand. Not just about the sexes, but why there is fear present. Is it vulnerability. Loss of control. Do men feel a loss of control and do women feel vulnerable. Investigate these feelings. This requires self-awareness, evaluating our motives and agendas. 

Of course, most won't do this or even see it as essential or necessary to combat this issue. "I just want my needs met and you are getting in the way of that. I have no control over what you say or do, and I feel threatened by this so I'm going to retaliate and show you where you're wrong and i'm right". Now, the battle begins. 

This doesn't just starts and ends on an individual basis; now all men are this and all women are that - no exceptions. All are categorized and lumped into the same bag. The veil is on and the perceptions gets skewed in all cases - unless we become emotionally intelligent enough to see through the veil of perception. To see through our fears and survival mechanisms.

But first we have to care. We have to want to understand. The more selfish one is, the less they will care to and will also blame the other sex for this and "invent" reasons why they shouldn't or need not care. It's your fault, why should I change for you, each will say. Then we join and form groups to join in with the battle. Yeah, this pill and that pill and this ism and that ism and we call them "ists" as in feminist and narcissists, and somewhere in between.

Men will get angry at all women because one rejected them and women will call all men cheaters if they got cheated on. All these negative traits we label unto both sexes and then we look for reasons to see them as true without investigating why we believe it to be true. Believing is seeing. That is how Reality works, not the other way around.

So maybe we can start to get an understanding of why we war amongst each other so much and to see if it is just our own fears and insecurities we are fighting against and to understand that we are projecting those fears and insecurities unto the opposite sex and how can we change the way we see them with awareness.

We cannot say everything is Consciousness but fail to consciously see everything.

Edited March 4 by Princess Arabia

[Yimpa]

I’ve come to the realization that I am at war with myself, fundamentally. 

[Princess Arabia]

2 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

I’ve come to the realization that I am at war with myself, fundamentally. 

Smart. Me too.

[Bazooka Jesus]

War, when seen from the highest perspective, is a dance.

Imagine how boring a dance would be without friction, separation, opposition. Why is it more fun to dance with another than to dance alone? Because the other is (seemingly) autonomous from you, has his/her own mind, own style, own moves. And the best and most exciting dances are a constantly fluctuating game of mutual pushing away and pulling towards, of teasing, tempting, provoking, challenging, allowing, denying, drawing in and brushing off.

Of course, this doesn't mean that it's not a good idea to strive for a healthy amount of harmony amid all of the tumultuous back and forth. But true harmony comes from the recognition of the underlying cosmic harmony that is always present... even in battle.

[Princess Arabia]

13 minutes ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

War, when seen from the highest perspective, is a dance.

Imagine how boring a dance would be without friction, separation, opposition. Why is it more fun to dance with another than to dance alone? Because the other is (seemingly) autonomous from you, has his/her own mind, own style, own moves. And the best and most exciting dances are a constantly fluctuating game of mutual pushing away and pulling towards, of teasing, tempting, provoking, challenging, allowing, denying, drawing in and brushing off.

Of course, this doesn't mean that it's not a good idea to strive for a healthy amount of harmony amid all of the tumultuous back and forth. But true harmony comes from the recognition of the underlying cosmic harmony that is always present... even in battle.

Ok. I understand, maybe that's why I'm single. I don't want to be battling with my loved one. I was in both and the loving one felt much less stressful. I'm not really referring to normal day-to-day disagreements that couples have; every couple has challenges, I'm more referring to the differences we have that are not accepted by either sex or the slurs we use for them as in women are shallow and men are pigs. Amongst others.

Edited March 5 by Princess Arabia

[Leo Gura]

Because peace is too boring

[Bazooka Jesus]

11 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

the slurs we use for them as in women are shallow and men are pigs.

Hey, can't argue with facts.

[Princess Arabia]

5 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Because peace is too boring

Well, if peace in a relationship is boring, give me boring please. I've had exciting relationships without the drama before. It's because people don't know how to be exciting with each other, so they feel bored if they aren't arguing. 

The point of the thread though, is the constant putting down of each of the sexes by the opposite sex. Not necessarily in relationships. Like the different pills and sits and isms.

[Princess Arabia]

Guys, my heart is open again for a relationship and you're not helping. Hehe. Don't need the help anyway, cause I'm my own person.

[LordFall]

I like your post and perspective, it's refreshing. I think the greatest lesson and goal to strive toward is that we can win this war. Men and women have never been closer than today I'd say. The fact that we can have mass gender discourse online and collectively "expose" eachother and learn together is of the the best cultural developments of the century so far I'd say, 

[Princess Arabia]

38 minutes ago, LordFall said:

I like your post and perspective, it's refreshing. I think the greatest lesson and goal to strive toward is that we can win this war. Men and women have never been closer than today I'd say. The fact that we can have mass gender discourse online and collectively "expose" eachother and learn together is of the the best cultural developments of the century so far I'd say, 

Nice perspective. You are seeing beyond the seen. Things have to be shifted before we can clean up house; but it starts from within.

[Bandman]

modern society does everything to increase male desperation while simultaneously doing everything to lower their chances with the opposite sex as much as possible.

The solution is more monogamy and less sleeping around for both men and women. this is simple math. 

with polygamy, society becomes a free-for-all battle for who can be the most attractive. women and men, when unbound by social systems, like in current day western civilisation, are also extremely hardcore and superficial in their sexual selection. women are even pickier and more hypergamous than men in this regard. this causes a hardening of society. a prisoners dilemma ensues, causing humankind to be in intense competition with each-other. 

notice the fact that modern western society has no alternative lifestyle for incel men. back in the day you could become a monk or something like that. if you were celibate anyway there were legitimate roles you could take on in the world. 

nowadays the term "incel"  only exists because your entire role in the world is that of an incel. no longer are you a virtuous monk, you are now more akin to the role of the "intouchable" in India. Since no woman wants you, you are denigrated to either be a worker for the rest of society or just a failed person as a whole. no longer is your celibacy virtuous or of any use to society, it is simply a signifier that you are a genetic failure and do not fit in society, because society is about unlimited sex with whoever you want. society says it is good to be desperate, and bad and backwards to have any idea of sexual conservatism and incentivizing monogamy. 

We're simply in pagan days. people are at war psychologically and this is because of the current sexual market in the west. women are watching the men kill each other and then decide to sleep with the top men. It's a hardcore evolution process, but since many of young women are attracted to non-spiritual, sociopathic men, the next generations will be even less spiritual and more wordly focused than we are. until a time will come again were polygamy will reduce and monogamy will increase again, by means of men organising again and being less desperate for women. 

I'm not saying the patriarchy should or will return or something. clearly that shit has gone too far in the past.  but the current sexual marketplace in the west is highly dysfunctional for society and individual human psyches. that is as clear as day.  

 

[Bandman]

many women incentivise men doing psychopathic behaviour. and men incentivise women to do this by being psychopathic men. all of this shit is a prisoners dilemma and we won't reach the cooperative position until individual men and women decide to be less selfish for sex. since our current society is so consumerist, materialist and devilish, most people are driven crazy by default and cant find love and refuge in things like spirituality. in a hyper competitive environment, it is not rewarded to act cooperatively. 

If both men and women were able to sit in a room quietly, it would be a lot better.

[Bandman]

a lot of women judge men according to the winner/loser paradigm in some hyperdarwinist way. if women would do less of this it'd be a lot better. I mean actually spiritually go in your psyche and decide that a 5'6  janitor is not more of a loser than a 6'2 famous DJ. it requires spiritual maturity, and i'm not saying you have to actually find attractive whom you don't find attractive, but already making the spiritual commitment to not think of men as losers and not think only selfishly goes a long way.
 

now, tell me what men should do for a better society.

Edited March 5 by Bandman