Insights from my first two psychedelic trips

[Staples]

Hi there. 

I've been watching Leo's content for close to 6 years now. Not actually sure how long. I've been interested in psychedelics since Leo started making videos on them, but I was too young and immature to try them years ago.

I have recently come across a good LSD supplier. So, what I hope to write today will show you the power of the proper use of psychedelics for personal development. I do not use them for recreation, I sit in my room and contemplate and enjoy what my mind can create.

Prior to both of these trips I had chemically tested my substances and verified it was an LSD analogue. It was sold to me as LSD, but it could be AL-LAD, 1P-LSD, whatever. I had cut a quarter tab and ingested to test how my body would react. It did not taste metalic, as is commonly report with 'bad acid'. I felt normal microdose effects, so was confident the drug was safe to use.

 

TRIP 1:

Trip 1 was a tester trip to get used to the psychedelic headspace. I dosed 80 ug. 

I did not notice any effects until about an hour and a half in.  Visually it looked as if the saturation of everything had been turned up 20%. Colours are more vibrant. I also got a fair bit of motion sickness. The motion sickness lasted most of the trip, so I laid down in bed for most of the trip. I imagine I would have had a very uncomfortable trip if I had tried this in a party setting. I was glad I had done this at home on my own. 

I dosed during the day, and I had decided that I needed to be in a dark room. Luckily, I have an ensuite. So I turned off the lights and shut the doors and created my own little blackout room. I was stunned by the ability of my mind to visualize things. Sometimes my conscious mind was in control, other times I would visualize things I wasn't consciously creating. 

I will skip to the end of the trip - throughout the trip 'detail' was a big theme. I was noticing all the little scratches on my desk, the dust particles in my carpet, the dandruff on my shirt. This prompted and inspired me to start cleaning and looking after my own space more. Clean your room as JP says. I would say I already take good care of my house, but this experience made me want to improve that even more. 

Another theme was masculinity. To take more responsibility and live with more intent. I only got a little taste of this, so I set it as something to contemplate for my next trip.

 

TRIP 2:

Trip 2 occurred 4 weeks after trip 1. I had intended to do it the follow week, but trip 1 had been pretty intense so I didn't touch it until the time was right.

The goal of trip 2 was to up the dose to 100ug and contemplate on what I will do for 2023. What to focus on for career/relationships. And masculinity.

Trip 1 was a great foundation, as this time I had very little motion sickness. I only felt it for about 20 minutes during the come up, then I felt great. 

I was able to focus much more on contemplation this time, as I was less distracted by the visuals. Despite dosing higher, I would say this trip was less intense.

At the peak of my trip, I was contemplating masculinity and kept getting light visions of demons/jesters/evil faces. I expected this to scare me more, but I was quite unemotional towards it. I knew they were interested in doing violent things by the way they looked, but since it was a relatively low dose, I still felt safe. At first it was if they were trying to intimidate me, but I held firm. Eventually I won their respect by being unphased and showing them I was dangerous too. This was quite a weird and alien way to go about it, but it felt a bit like the scene from Dune, where Paul fights Jamis in the desert. Paul wins the fight and is accepted into the tribe. 

This taught me that a key element of masculinity in simply holding firm and asserting your will when you know you are right. 

Later, I was contemplating on relationships/my career as an artist. I had two big takeaways:

1 - Finite VS Infinite pursuits. You may have many interests and potential life purposes. The one you should focus on is the one you can see yourself doing for the rest of your life. For example, aside from my main creative job I also have an interest in creating music, but only so much to release one album and then put the craft down forever. This is a nice goal, but since it is only something I wish to do for a short amount of time I should not prioritize it. I can do that when I decide to spare the time, but I shouldn't feel bad about not pursuing it when I have something else I wish to explore to the end of my life. Same goes for relationships, you will know you've found the right partner when you can see yourself with them for the rest of your life. Not just a for a quick fuck, or a couple year long relationship. 

2 - Treat the final product of your work as if it already exists, and must simply be revealed over time. - The truth is that your life is like a block of marble. You can chisel it however you wish, and by the end of your life you will have a beautiful sculpture, and the form that sculpture takes is up to you. For example, in my career I work with clients doing creative work. With this perspective in mind, I can be confident that by the end of the project everyone will walk away satisfied with the work. The small creative choices we make in the middle of the project don't really matter, it's just personal preference. By the end of the contract, they will have a finished product, and you will be paid, so make the journey from point A to point B fun and exciting for all parties. There's no point in stressing about if what you're doing should be different in some small way, the end result will be created and sold regardless.  

--

And that wraps up my insights from my first two psychedelic trips. If this post gets some good attention, I will start a journal on the forum and keep writing these trip reports. 

 

Edited December 18, 2022 by Staples

[Leo Gura]

Excellent work!

Thanks for sharing.

[MarkKol]

21 hours ago, Staples said:

my career as an artist. I had two big takeaways:

1 - Finite VS Infinite pursuits. You may have many interests and potential life purposes. The one you should focus on is the one you can see yourself doing for the rest of your life. For example, aside from my main creative job I also have an interest in creating music, but only so much to release one album and then put the craft down forever. This is a nice goal, but since it is only something I wish to do for a short amount of time I should not prioritize it. I can do that when I decide to spare the time, but I shouldn't feel bad about not pursuing it when I have something else I wish to explore to the end of my life. Same goes for relationships, you will know you've found the right partner when you can see yourself with them for the rest of your life. Not just a for a quick fuck, or a couple year long relationship. 

2 - Treat the final product of your work as if it already exists, and must simply be revealed over time. - The truth is that your life is like a block of marble. You can chisel it however you wish, and by the end of your life you will have a beautiful sculpture, and the form that sculpture takes is up to you. For example, in my career I work with clients doing creative work. With this perspective in mind, I can be confident that by the end of the project everyone will walk away satisfied with the work. The small creative choices we make in the middle of the project don't really matter, it's just personal preference. By the end of the contract, they will have a finished product, and you will be paid, so make the journey from point A to point B fun and exciting for all parties. There's no point in stressing about if what you're doing should be different in some small way, the end result will be created and sold regardless.  

Wow you're using psychedelics to contemplate life Purpose, I thought that would be counter productive for some reason.

I "contemplated" a similar question, and got the same answer: I should definitely look for something that I'm gonna be interested in 30 years. With the way our society evolves jobs and businesses are constantly changing, so what will happen when something you do morphs into something else? When that happens you really have to love what you do to keep going. 

An example of jobs & businesses evolving is actually in your ball park, the standard way of doing art is being threatened by A.I. and A.I. is probably going to wipe the floor with people who don't care much about it. While people who love art are always going to fight for it, they're always going to innovate and do it better than A.I ever could. People who don't love their jobs aren't going to jump through extra hoops or run an extra mile to do it better.

I'm assuming you're a digital artist so what tablet do you use for it?

Edited December 19, 2022 by MarkKol

[Pudgey]

Beautiful trip report - especially Finite VS Infinite pursuits

Quote

You can chisel it however you wish, and by the end of your life you will have a beautiful sculpture, and the form that sculpture takes is up to you

Great insight. 

Keep going. 

[Staples]

@MarkKol Close, not a digital artist though. I like Wacoms but often prefer a mouse and keyboard for what I do.

I’m being non-specific as to what I do so I don’t give away who I am.

AI will definitely impact what I do, but I think a lot of people are overreacting to deleting our jobs. Robots can’t run McDonalds yet, so they definitely can’t run a creative studio.  We will still require a conscious human to tweak what has been done by the machine. It just means our work gets easier and cheaper, so using these tools our output must increase to remain competitive.

[Manusia]

This is gold, I print it.